This Chat Group's Vibe is a Bit Off
Chapter 42

Koschey, You Absurd Woman / Hey, Wait-How Did You All Die?

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26d ago•

Under Koschei's arrangements, Qianyi and the Reunion cadres arrived at Saint-Junburg in the shortest possible time and smoothly took over all the assets Fyodor had left behind, such as the Imperial Trio.

The Crown, the Scepter, and the Coronation Robe.

When they arrived at Saint-Junburg, the items symbolizing imperial authority were all sitting on the throne, untouched.

"Fyodor's actually pretty decent. He's making me feel too bad to dig him up and beat him senseless." Qianyi pressed the Crown onto Talulah's head, but it did not fit at all because her horns were in the way. It suited someone like him, whose head did not have any strange decorations growing from it, much better.

Looking at Qianyi wearing the Crown and sitting on the throne, Talulah could not help asking, "How does it feel?"

Qianyi shook his head and gave his assessment. "A shabby hut in the dead of night can easily lull one to sleep, but a comfortable palace is like a ship's helm amid raging waves. The King, like a sailor watched by Bleach amid wind and thunder, cannot rest. A head that wears the Crown cannot sleep peacefully upon a pillow."

He stood, removed the Crown, and casually tossed it to FrostNova beside him, signaling that she could take a seat too. And so, for the first time, Koschei—the long-serving Grand Duke of Ursus—saw the throne of Ursus treated like some iconic check-in photo spot, with everyone taking turns sitting on it.

She found it hard not to break down, wondering how Ursus had become like this.

After everyone had taken a turn sitting on it and experiencing what it felt like to be Emperor—even Sarkaz Mercenaries like Frost, Ines, W, and Mudrock—Koschei finally gave Talulah a complicated look and motioned for her to put on the robe, wear the Crown, take up the Scepter, and proceed with the formal coronation. "I shall ring the Tsar Bell for Your Majesty and summon the grand dukes and nobles to pay their respects."

When a new Emperor ascended the throne, the nobles should naturally come to pay their respects.

Yet after Koschei rang the Tsar Bell, everyone waited quietly for a full five hours. From dawn until the sun stood high at noon, not a single noble came to pay respects.

With an awkward expression, she immediately sent Snake Scale to investigate. The result was that all those nobles had indeed come. But seeing that someone had already beaten them into the Saint-Junburg palace, most of them were now watching from outside Saint-Junburg, while some had even begun mobilizing troops.

"What are these grand dukes and marquises trying to do?" Koschei was rarely angered.

Could these brain-dead nobles not tell what the situation was?!

Could at least one of them hurry up and come over with some sense?!

Just as Koschei's heart was sinking to rock bottom, and she was even tempted to drag out a group of commoners to play nobles before sending all those idiots to their deaths afterward, good news finally arrived from the gates of Saint-Junburg Palace.

"Report! A noble has come to pay respects."

Koschei was delighted.

Was it Islam Witt, the Empire's Minister of Finance? No, that man was shrewd. He was probably still observing the situation from the shadows.

Grand Duke Vanya was possible. If he came, that would carry weight.

Marquis Boris would not be bad either. If it was him, she would raise his position later. Viscount Kerk's rank was a little too low; if he came, it would not carry enough weight. She could only promote him two ranks on the spot, from viscount to marquis.

But when she heard her subordinate's report, her face darkened.

Fuck! What the hell was the "leader" of Originium Pool?!

Koschei, You Nonsensical Bitch

Koschei was completely stunned.

No, sister, did Ursus even have a place called Originium Pool? And what the hell was the leader of Originium Pool? What, remnants of the Tara Dynasty that Victoria had weeded out?

A country mutt had come to Ursus to beg for food? Beat them out with clubs!

These days, every random cat and dog dared to come and latch onto Ursus.

Though that was what she thought, when she saw Qianyi and the others standing below for a full five hours, their expressions clearly beginning to sour, Koschei could only resign herself to it.

A mutt was still better than no one.

At that moment, a carriage entered the palace. Its body was crafted from jet-black ebony, smooth as a mirror, inlaid with exquisite metal ornaments, with golden trim outlining elegant curves. It looked as if it had rolled straight out of a royal court.

Koschei had arranged this carefully. If only two nobles walked in on foot, it would look too shabby. The driver bent down and opened the door, shielding the upper edge with his hand so the distinguished guests would not accidentally hit their heads.

A purple high heel lightly touched the ground. Above the slender calf was beauty that took one's breath away. Unlike the matronly impression given by those heels, the one stepping out of the carriage was a young girl. She wore a purple Victoria gauze dress, tailored close to her body and tightly wrapping her full chest, slim waist, and shapely hips. Her skirt was long, but its side slit ran all the way up to her hips, revealing her rounded buttocks and fair, long legs with the slightest movement. The slender tail behind her swayed as she walked, lending her the air of a noble queen.

Following behind her was a blonde "Wyvern" with her head lowered, dressed and styled similarly. The distinction had been made deliberately.

Wildfire.jpg

Under normal circumstances, Aibrana would never have allowed her younger sister, who served as her Kagemusha, to appear before others. But this situation was special. Sisters might be an extra advantage. If she wanted to defeat Talulah and rise to power, she had to use every means available.

Hehe, I'm definitely going to win!

I will seize control of Victoria! I will revive the Tara Dynasty!!! I will reclaim everything that belongs to the Drac!!!!

"Aibrana, accompanied by my foolish younger sister Lavhini, offers her respects to Your Majesty, the great Red Dragon." Aibrana bowed toward Talulah on the throne, making no effort to conceal her Drac traits as her gaze continuously swept over the people around her.

"You are Drac?" Talulah recognized the sisters' race at a glance.

"In answer to Your Majesty, we are." Aibrana studied Talulah. Her heroic face, paired with a male-style Coronation Robe and that masculine aura, made her an absolute top-tier woman killer.

So who was the real Emperor? She surveyed those present from the corner of her eye.

Very quickly, her gaze settled on Koschei beside... Qianyi.

As the leader of Originium Pool, she could tell at once that this woman radiated an extraordinary presence. It was the aura possessed only by someone who had long held an absolute advantage from a high position. Was this the mastermind behind Talulah?

Troublesome. She had assumed it would be a man, but it turned out to be a woman.

Looking at Koschei, who radiated feminine charm, then at Talulah, who seemed like a fusion of a fairy-tale Prince Charming and knight, Aibrana began to sweat profusely.

Damn it, she had been working in the wrong direction!

Was it too late to abandon the sexy route and go for the woman-slaying route instead?

"Come forward."

Talulah beckoned the Aibrana sisters closer so she could see them more clearly. Upon examining them carefully, she was delighted. She had not expected to encounter members of her own kind. She had once believed that the Drac Clan had died out until only she remained.

If other Drac still existed, then she seemingly had no need to enter a political marriage with Qianyi. Though it was sad to say, she really did not have much feminine charm. She could not let someone like herself, who lacked femininity, ruin her good friend's first marriage. These Drac sisters, however, were both exceptionally beautiful. Even if it was merely a political marriage, he definitely would not lose out.

At the thought of soon introducing her good friend to an excellent match, Talulah could not help humming to herself, then looked toward Qianyi and sought his opinion with her eyes.

Why was Ata looking at me?

Qianyi, noticing Talulah looking at him, wore a puzzled expression. Only after meeting her eyes for quite a while did he discern the plea in them.

Did Ata want to catch up with Banana Sister and Wildfire, the two Drac sisters, at close range? Then she could just pull them over beside the throne, right? Forget it. At a time like this, all he needed to do was smile and nod.

He smiled back. Talulah immediately nodded, understanding her dear friend's intentions.

Got it. Qianyi had taken a liking to the sisters. She would find a way to send them to her good friend's bed later.

Aibrana below noticed from the corner of her eye that Talulah was communicating with someone through their gazes, which made her even more certain of her guess.

Talulah was seeking that white-haired woman's opinion. She had to be the mastermind who helped Talulah seize the throne of Ursus!

"Qianyi, why is Talulah looking at you?" Kiana asked softly. After standing for five hours, she was bored to death.

"Maybe she wants to catch up with the Wildfire sisters," Qianyi guessed.

"You've met these two little sisters too?" Kiana was shocked. "Why do you know everyone, Qianyi? Are we going to test these sisters on their educational backgrounds next?"

"I've met them, but we aren't that familiar. Also, why does that sound so weird coming from you?"

"That must be your imagination. I'm a very pure child." Kiana nodded as though affirming something.

"..." Qianyi suddenly wanted to beat Kiana up, but with so many people here, it was not convenient to act out. He could only find an excuse. "Are you bored? If you are, let's take a walk around Saint-Junburg."

"Sure, sure." Kiana agreed immediately without suspecting anything.

She had long since had enough of standing.

While no one was paying attention, she quietly retreated behind Patriot and opened a spatial gate. Qianyi also took the chance to retreat behind Koschei, his entire body tensed as he entered combat mode, planning to kick Kiana in the face later.

"What are you doing? Don't stand there... Aaaahhh!!!" Startled when someone suddenly came around behind her, Koschei instinctively clamped her legs together and straightened her body. Like Hajime in a stress response, she let out a scream, instantly shattering the palace's harmonious atmosphere.

Her scream startled Talulah as well. Her body swayed, and the Crown, which had never fit properly to begin with, fell off as a result, clattering down from the throne.

Patriot, FrostNova, Mudrock, and the others assumed that an enemy had invaded. They hurriedly drew their weapons and immediately...

Formed a cylindrical formation around Qianyi, protecting him in the center as they glared furiously in every direction.

Aibrana also put on a display of rushing to defend the sovereign. Taking the opportunity, she picked up the Crown from the ground and blended in with the group. But it was not out of kindness. It was born of her ambition to rule the world, as she wanted to touch the Crown that symbolized Ursus's supreme authority.

But whether the Crown had triggered some mechanism from hitting the ground or carried some Origin Stone Arts, the moment she gripped it, an overwhelming gravity nearly suffocated her. It was as though the weight of the entire world had fallen upon her shoulders. Her chest sank, her body was pressed down by an irresistible force, and her limbs became nearly impossible to move.

After holding on for several seconds, the taste of blood rose in her throat. She forced herself to swallow it without making a sound, but the violent sensation of weightlessness still made her collapse to her knees with a thud. The Crown slipped from her clenched hand and struck the floor with a crisp clang.

But everyone's attention was elsewhere at the moment, so aside from her sister Lavhini, no one noticed that she had used the opening to pull off another terrible stunt.

"???"

Unable to understand how the atmosphere had suddenly become so tense, Qianyi looked speechlessly at Koschei, the culprit behind it all. "Koschei, what the hell is wrong with you?"

Why had she screamed like some woman?

"Don't... don't stand behind me..." A faint, delicate flush appeared on Koschei's face. She was clearly recalling something unspeakable, her voice low and slightly panicked as she made the request cautiously.

What are you, Madara Uchiha? You can't pee when someone stands behind you?

Koschei did not want to be this way either. But Talulah's dual wielding of Fire of Joy and Frost of Sorrow had directly shattered Koschei's dignity and pride, leaving an indelible scar on her mind. Thus, whenever someone appeared behind her now, she became like a snake gripped by its vital point—her head unable to move while her body twisted frantically in a stress response.

Hey, Wait, Why Are You All Dead?

The misunderstanding was cleared up.

No enemy had attacked, and Qianyi had not been assassinated. Haji Snake had merely suffered a sudden stress response.

But after that incident, the atmosphere became extremely awkward.

The Aibrana sisters stood there, embarrassed beyond measure and unsure what to do. In truth, they were simply afraid their terrible stunt would be discovered.

Qianyi, who had originally wanted to leave, could only pick up the Crown from the ground and prepare to put it back on Talulah. Since that outfit did not fit her, it would fall off the moment Ata stood up, so she could only sit there like a piece of ancient cured meat and not move.

The moment he picked up the Crown, gravity descended upon him in an instant. It felt as though the entire Thirteen Territories of Ursus rested on his shoulders.

Noticing what was happening, Koschei reminded him, "The Crown of Ursus carries an Origin Stone Art called Regal Authority. He who wishes to wear the Crown must bear its weight. If one lacks sufficient breadth of spirit to bear the title of Emperor, they will be crushed by it. But if its bearer is an Emperor capable of leading Ursus toward greatness, this weight will crush every enemy standing in Ursus's path."

"An interesting ability. Why didn't I feel it before?" Qianyi thought of the Star of Eden, the Divine Key capable of controlling gravity. He had very much wanted to get his hands on it, but it had been shattered too thoroughly. Only the Herrscher of Reason could repair it quickly. Unfortunately, Welt had run off, while Seele was still studying hard, so it could only be left to Heavenly Mandate's technical department to repair slowly.

"Because people die," Koschei said. If one did not possess an Emperor's breadth of spirit, one would die before crushing any enemies.

Not every Emperor possessed the ambition to rule the world. Most of the time, the throne was chosen by bloodline rather than ability. Thus, throughout history, the lower limit of most Emperors was so low that one might wonder whether they were even human.

Should I turn it off?

Koschei had just been about to suggest it when Qianyi put the Crown on his head, intending to test its effects.

At that instant, the mountains and forests fell silent, ancient bells thundered, and a great, ancient voice echoed across the skies above Saint-Junburg.

Koschei's eyes widened. In her thousand-plus years of memories, even Ursus's most brilliant rulers had only managed to cover the entire Saint-Junburg palace. More often, the Crown would be sealed away by casters the moment some stupid pig heard that it could crush him to death.

Yet this Regal Authority, which covered all of Saint-Junburg, was simply unprecedented. She did not dare blink even once, determined to engrave this magnificent moment upon her soul.

The sacred Emperor of Ursus was about to unleash his sacred Origin Stone Art.

A massive spiritual pressure descended from the heavens. The nobles gathered outside Saint-Junburg all felt an irresistible force, a power that nearly tore their consciousness apart. Their backs bent involuntarily, their knees seemed nailed in place, unable to move. Every living thing had to lower its head, submit, and kneel. If they did not kneel, their leg bones would shatter. If they did not prostrate themselves, their spines would snap. If they did not lower their heads, black blood would flow from their eyes, mouths, and noses.

But Regal Authority's aggressive side targeted only enemies. Subjects who followed the Emperor would not suffer the oppression of authority and power. Only enemies and traitors would have their spines and knees shattered by the hammer formed of authority and power, becoming homeless dogs.

After wearing it for a while, Qianyi gave his sharp review. "It feels... inferior to ten-thousandfold gravity."

"Do you need me to turn it off?" Koschei asked carefully.

"No. This thing seems to have voice recognition." Qianyi removed the Crown and shouted at it, "Xiao Ai, turn off."

The invisible pressure vanished, and the distant, great voice faded along with it, returning everything to silence.

Koschei: "???"

What the hell was that?!

"Not particularly useful, but it's pretty interesting as a toy." Qianyi walked up the steps to the throne and placed the Crown on Talulah's head. Since she sat there stiffly because the robe would fall off if she moved, she barely dared to move at all.

But no matter which direction he put it on from, her horns were especially obstructive. In the end, Qianyi simply hung the Crown sideways from one of Talulah's horns.

Seeing Talulah looking uncomfortable all over, Qianyi looked around and realized that, apart from the Aibrana sisters, everyone else was one of their own. He said simply, "Looks like no other nobles are coming. We're all friends here, so relax."

Talulah sighed in relief and asked, "Can I take this coat off? I've been holding myself like this for five hours. It's really uncomfortable."

Without waiting for anyone to agree, Talulah lifted the Coronation Robe, folded it, and tossed it onto the floor. She rose from the throne, plopped down on the steps beside it, then kicked off the golden high heels Koschei had prepared with alternating feet and began rubbing her aching ankles. Qianyi, who had long been tired from standing, naturally sat down in the newly vacated throne, like someone eagerly snatching an empty seat when another passenger stood up on a crowded subway.

Seeing this, everyone else also relaxed and sat directly on the floor, then began fiercely condemning the evils of feudalism. It did not even provide chairs for people to sit on. Koschei broke into a cold sweat upon hearing that and hurriedly ordered people to bring chairs.

The sight nearly made Aibrana spit out blood. She felt that this group possessed none of the solemn, glorious sense of destiny that came with "passing the imperial examination and ascending to the heavens in one step." Instead, they resembled bandits taking office in Goose City, radiating the same sneaky air as a phantom thief crew.

But the one who angered her most was Talulah.

Fuck! They were both Drac, so why was this tomboy so lucky!

You had encountered a father who let you sit on the throne rather than letting you end up like us, nearly having our bloodline exterminated by the Aslan Clan. Yet not only were you not properly grateful and quick to contribute your value, you were acting so delicate. You could not even stand sitting on the throne for five hours. You had absolutely none of the self-awareness a puppet Emperor should have.

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