How could a dignified imperial prince go stealing lamp oil?!
Dantai Mo was utterly speechless.
Even with half his body paralyzed, he still had his pride. He disdained such sneaking and pilfering.
The Black Tortoise System: [Your Highness, my level is high enough to check other hosts' missions. I just discovered that the Jinyang Marquis's Residence's Fifth Miss has a mission to win you over. You can simply hold your position and wait for the prey to come to your door. Once she arrives, we can...] steal lamp oil.
Dantai Mo: "..."
Just listen to that haughty tone.
Was stealing lamp oil really something to be so proud of?
And "we"? Since when had he and this useless system become "we"?
[Win me over? What does that mean?]
The Black Tortoise System: [It means gaining your affection. I think her ultimate goal should be to marry you.]
Dantai Mo gave a cold snort, indicating that he understood.
The fourth prince, Prince Rui, was a renowned handsome man in Great Xia. He had inherited all of Consort Yan's finest qualities, with striking features, graceful manners, and an extraordinary bearing.
As the Book of Songs said: "There stands a refined gentleman, like ivory cut and polished, like jade carved and ground." (1) Dantai Mo deserved to be called a gentleman as fine as jade.
Before he lost sensation in his lower limbs, Dantai Mo had been the dream lover of every noble young lady at court. Even after his misfortune, some still declared that they would marry no one but him.
Dantai Mo considered that the Marquis of Jinyang's Fifth Miss might also be a shallow person who cared only about appearances.
Since she would come looking for him of her own accord, the proud, reserved Dantai Mo put his mind at ease and went about his daily routine.
Yet day after day passed, and he never saw so much as the shadow of the Jinyang Marquis's Residence's Fifth Miss.
The Black Tortoise System: [Your Highness, the Marquis of Jinyang's Fifth Miss seems to be a lazy bum. Perhaps you should take the initiative after all.]
Dantai Mo: "..."
The Black Tortoise System: [Your Highness, trust me. Once you experience this system's capabilities, you'll be hooked!]
Dantai Mo: "..." Who would get hooked on stealing lamp oil?!
Jian Ruonan had no desire whatsoever to do missions. [Win over the fourth prince] sounded simple, but in practice, it was harder than climbing to the heavens.
An imperial prince was so exalted. How could winning him over possibly be easy?
She certainly wasn't going to become a bootlicking puppy.
Wasn't eating, drinking, and lounging around like a salted fish at the Marquis's Estate a much sweeter life?
She couldn't stomach the bitterness of love.
After the system's interruption, Jian Ruonan had even lost her appetite for juicy gossip.
Min and Jian Xilu were still waiting for their share of the gossip!
Being left halfway through a juicy story was truly unbearable.
Staying too long in Shi-shi's room risked catching athlete's foot. Min felt as though she were sitting on needles, and when Jian Ruonan stopped serving up gossip, she hurriedly took her two daughters and said her farewells.
As it happened, the duke's residence was hosting a grand banquet that day. According to the gatekeeper, His Highness Prince Rui had arrived, and the guests were already waiting in the reception hall.
Jian Ruonan hadn't expected to encounter the fourth prince here. She intended to take a look and see just what sort of divine being he was.
As for winning him over, she would leave that to fate.
But before Jian Ruonan even caught sight of him, the familiar mechanical voice sounded in her head again, just as she sat down in the reception hall.
[Ding-] [Congratulations, host. You have attracted the fourth prince's attention. Points +5.] [Your points have reached ten. Congratulations, host. You are now eligible to open the Points Mall.] [Would you like to open the Points Mall?]
Two red squares floated in the air, one marked [Yes] and the other [No].
Jian Ruonan promptly tapped [Yes].
A dazzling, multicolored Points Mall immediately appeared in her mind.
Only then did Jian Ruonan belatedly ask, [Hey, system, I haven't even seen the fourth prince yet. How did I spark his interest?]
She was certain she wasn't a Mary Sue heroine. Even a Mary Sue heroine couldn't spark someone's interest before they had so much as met, could she?
The system: [Heh-heh, I'm not too sure about that either.]
Jian Ruonan: Trash.
Jian Ruonan had long since grown accustomed to the system's uselessness. She simply chalked it up to a bug or an erroneous operation and happily began admiring the Points Mall.
The system's aesthetic taste apparently remained stuck in the eighties. The entire Points Mall resembled an eighties disco, with neon lights in every color flashing wildly.
Jian Ruonan became even more convinced that the system was garbage.
The system: [This is a dopamine color palette. The whole point is to make people unable to resist.]
Jian Ruonan: [Keep blowing your own trumpet!]
At the center of the shop stood a large wheel. Spin it, and a small steel ball inside would spin along with it. Whichever slot the ball landed in, she would receive the item inside. The wheel was divided into thirty-two slots, each holding a different item.
Jian Ruonan took a look. The slots held potatoes, corn, sweet potatoes, chocolate, milk tea, gold, cosmetics... and modern medicines, among other things. Most amazingly, the items in the slots changed along with the flashing lights.
What really got Jian Ruonan's dopamine flowing were the toilet paper and sanitary pads in the slots.
When Jian Ruonan first arrived, she had been at the Farm Estate. Since she had gone hungry for three days and nights, she hadn't needed the toilet. After returning to the Marquis's Estate and eating well, however, that particular need had arisen.
The chamber pot at the Marquis's Estate was very comfortable to sit on. Incense ash lined the bucket, and incense burned in the corner. There wasn't the slightest unpleasant odor; it even smelled lovely. In terms of comfort, it rivaled a modern toilet.
What she couldn't bear was the toilet paper. It was so hard and rough that it had nearly rubbed her tender bottom bloody. She had tactfully suggested to Min that perhaps she could be given some soft fabric to use instead.
Instead, Min brought her a box containing smooth bamboo slips carved with all kinds of flowers.
Jian Ruonan, in her ignorance, assumed they were flower divination slips or something similar. She picked one up and examined it for quite a while. "What's this?"
Min taught her how to use it. "These are toilet sticks. You can wash them and use them again."
Jian Ruonan nearly flung the box away.
Min hurriedly explained, "These are all new and unused. Everyone in our household has their own toilet sticks. After you use them, have a maid wash them, then ask her to bring them out when you need them again. If you don't want them washed, just throw them away afterward."
Jian Ruonan: "..."
In the end, she still chose toilet paper. Rough as it was, scraping her bottom with a toilet stick chiefly reminded her of scraping putty during home renovations. She was afraid one careless scrape would leave her bottom bleeding.
At the sight of the toilet paper in the slots, Jian Ruonan's eyes gleamed green with hunger.
[Can I exchange points for this?]
The system: [No, this is the Wheel of Fortune. It's for prize draws. Each draw costs two points. Want to try, Nannan?]
[Yes!] Jian Ruonan thought it over. Today, she absolutely had to win some toilet paper!!
After two points were deducted, the wheel began spinning. The Points Mall's neon lights flashed incessantly, stimulating dopamine production. It was thrilling.
"Good fortune comes, wishing you good fortune! Good fortune brings joy and love..." Swept up in excitement, Jian Ruonan burst into song.
"...May you prosper and flourish across the four seas!" (2)
As her singing ended, the ball stopped in an orange-red slot.
The familiar mechanical voice sounded: [Good fortune has come to your door! Congratulations, you have won one "potato"!!]
The system: [Congratulations, host. You won a potato on your very first draw.]
A potato?
What was she supposed to do with a potato?
Jian Ruonan suspected the system was taking a sly dig at her.
The system: [This dynasty doesn't have potatoes. They come from foreign lands. Potatoes are extraordinary-their yield per mu is dozens of times that of rice or wheat. They can solve food shortages...]
Jian Ruonan: [Quit yapping. Again.]
What she needed most right now was toilet paper. As for the potato, she could keep it to braise with some pork ribs.
The system immediately displayed a prompt: [Draw again?]
Jian Ruonan decisively selected [Yes].
This prize draw was just like drawing cards in a game: there were only zero draws or countless draws. Once you became hooked, there was simply no pulling yourself out.
The system was exceedingly considerate. After Jian Ruonan used up her ten points, it even offered a lending service, loaning her points so she could keep drawing.
At the final tally, Jian Ruonan had won four potatoes, two ears of corn, two boxes of ibuprofen, one packet of salt, one packet of potent aphrodisiac, plus ten "Thank you for playing, please come again" results... She hadn't won a single box of toilet paper, and now she owed the system thirty points.
Jian Ruonan: [...Why do you have things like potent aphrodisiacs?]
The system: [Nan Nan, let me tell you, this stuff is amazing. With this packet, you can have the fourth prince in minutes!! Nan Nan, you're so lucky!! My bending the rules to let you buy on credit wasn't wasted!]
Jian Ruonan: *[...]*
Just shut up already!!
Garbage really was garbage!!
Was that the kind of thing people could just take casually?!
Useless!
[Host's points: -30. Interest of three points will accrue daily. Please actively complete missions and repay your debt promptly.]
Jian Ruonan: "..."
A black-hearted system! How could the interest be so high?!
Jian Ruonan had every reason to suspect that the purpose of this game was to put her in debt, leaving her no choice but to do missions!
This useless system was playing mind games with her!
Before you continue