Black Tortoise System: [The Fifth Miss looks delicate and gentle, but underneath, she's ferocious. Your Highness, marrying a woman like her would truly be beneath you.]
Dantai Mo: [...When did I ever say I would marry the Fifth Miss?]
When had this useless system taken it upon itself to arrange his marriage?
Black Tortoise System: [The Fifth Miss's mission is to win you over, and you need her Lamp Oil. Marrying her would be an alliance of two powerful forces. The deeper your involvement with her, the faster my Lamp Oil replenishes. Marrying the Fifth Miss is the best possible strategy.]
[With her family background and character, marrying you would mean blue smoke was rising from her ancestors' graves-a sign of tremendous ancestral fortune.]
Dantai Mo: [...]
If the Fifth Miss heard that, she might rip your balls off.
Dantai Mo: [Leaving aside when your Lamp Oil will be fully replenished, we still need to confirm whether the Fifth Miss's mission is actually to win me over.]
Black Tortoise System: [My level is so high. Your Highness, please trust my expertise. There is absolutely no way I could have misjudged this!]
Dantai Mo: [Then tell me, has the Fifth Miss done a single thing to try to win me over so far?]
Not only had she done nothing, she even looked down on him for being crippled!
This supposed mission was almost certainly nonsense the useless system had cooked up.
Black Tortoise System: [...The Fifth Miss has indeed done nothing to win you over, but that only proves she's lazy. It doesn't prove I'm wrong!]
Dantai Mo: [Shut up!]
Useless thing!
As soon as Prince Rui appeared, Commissioner Zhang hurriedly ordered the subordinates to separate Madam Song and Censor Cao, then immediately presented the seized gold, silver, and jewels to Dantai Mo. "Prince Rui, how should we handle this?"
"Take Censor Cao back to the Embroidered Uniform Guard. We'll decide what to do after I enter the palace and report to my imperial father." Dantai Mo swept his gaze across the scene and immediately spotted where Jian Ruonan and her brother were hiding.
Jian Ruonan had a taro leaf perched on her head and held another two in front of her. Beneath her was a head.
Teng lay on the ground, willingly serving as his sister's seat cushion.
The Fifth Miss really never let herself suffer the slightest discomfort.
Having finished watching the drama, Jian Ruonan and Teng planned to wait until everyone left before emerging.
Watching the Embroidered Uniform Guard bow and scrape before Dantai Mo, Jian Ruonan felt puzzled.
[The Embroidered Uniform Guard answers directly to the emperor. They don't even give imperial relatives the time of day, so why are they so respectful toward the Fourth Prince, reporting every little detail to him?]
[Huh? So Emperor Deyuan dotes on the Fourth Prince this much? He actually gave him command of the Embroidered Uniform Guard.]
[Anyone who commands the Embroidered Uniform Guard is definitely the emperor's trusted confidant. If the Fourth Prince weren't crippled, he'd absolutely be a candidate for crown prince.]
[Sigh, how did such a handsome man, as radiant as clear moonlight after rain, end up crippled?]
Dantai Mo: "..."
Enough! Why did she keep dwelling on the word "crippled"?
Teng turned his head and gave his sister a long, sidelong look.
What cripple?
That was His Highness Prince Rui, accomplished in both letters and martial arts!
Teng idolized the Fourth Prince. At the sight of him, his eyes practically glowed green, and he struggled to crawl out and pay his respects, abandoning his duties as his sister's cushion.
Jian Ruonan glared at him and whispered, "If Father catches us sneaking around like thieves, you'd better watch your hide."
Teng declared righteously, "A real man takes responsibility for his own actions. I'm not afraid."
The moment they spoke, the nearby Embroidered Uniform Guard discovered them.
"My lord, there are two children hiding in the grass!"
Jian Zhang hurriedly hauled them over. "These are my daughter and son. Teng, hurry and pay your respects to His Highness Prince Rui."
Jian Huateng brushed the grass off his clothes and bowed to the Fourth Prince with his hands clasped. "Jian Huateng greets His Highness Prince Rui. Your Highness is indeed as elegant as a jade tree in the wind and as radiant as the rumors say."
[This brat really was born to be a treacherous courtier. His bootlicking skills are next-level!]
Jian Huateng: "..."
Jian Zhang: "??"
What? A treacherous courtier?
Teng would become a treacherous courtier someday?
Jian Zhang's brows knitted tightly. Perhaps he hadn't beaten the boy enough.
He pulled Jian Ruonan closer to him. He couldn't let Teng corrupt Nannan.
Jian Huateng: "..."
Father, I only just turned six!
After hearing Sister's thoughts, shouldn't you be worried about her corrupting me?
Before long, news arrived from the Embroidered Uniform Guard. There really was a woman surnamed Qin living in Kitten Alley. A little intimidation had made her confess everything: she was indeed Censor Cao's mistress. The concubine's brother had also been apprehended, and a substantial amount of illicit money had been recovered from his home.
Once the case was wrapped up, Commissioner Zhang invited Jian Zhang home for tea. "We've recently encountered a difficult case. I'd like to ask Vice Minister Jian for some advice."
Who knew what secret sources Vice Minister Jian had? He knew every detail of things even the Embroidered Uniform Guard had failed to uncover.
"I wouldn't call it advice, but I can offer you a few ideas, Commissioner." Jian Zhang summoned his personal servant. "Take the Fourth Young Master home."
Teng: "?? I'm going home alone? What about Fifth Sister?"
Jian Zhang: "Your fifth sister is coming with me."
Teng: "...Why?"
Jian Zhang: "...Children shouldn't meddle in grown-ups' business."
Deciding that pleading with his father was useless, Teng turned to his fifth sister instead, presenting his chubby little face. "Fifth Sister, I can't live without you."
Jian Ruonan: "..."
This little treacherous courtier!
In the end, Jian Zhang took Teng along after all. And it wasn't just Teng-Prince Rui, Dantai Mo, came too.
Dantai Mo oversaw the Embroidered Uniform Guard and had heard something of the case Commissioner Zhang mentioned. It had remained unsolved for almost a month, without a single lead.
The group arrived at Commissioner Zhang's residence.
Commissioner Zhang's name was Zhang Ying, courtesy name Hanyu. She was the Earl of Ningyuan's eldest legitimate daughter. The earl had earned merit supporting the emperor's rise and enjoyed his deep favor. Barely into her twenties, Zhang Ying had already become a commissioner of Principal Fourth Rank.
The Earl of Ningyuan's residence stood in Four Crossways Alley, beside the Five City Garrison Command. It was a five-courtyard mansion, and since the countess hailed from Jiangnan, its grounds had been built with something of a Jiangnan garden's charm.
Zhang Ying led them into the reception hall and served pastries, fruit, and fragrant tea. With food available, Jian Ruonan naturally had no complaints.
After sitting down and lifting her teacup, Zhang Ying recounted the case.
The case was actually quite simple: an imperial consort had secretly drugged Emperor Deyuan in hopes of conceiving an imperial heir.
Emperor Deyuan had flown into a rage and ordered a thorough investigation. Yet even after turning almost the entire harem upside down, they still didn't know how the drug had entered the palace or who had administered it. Most absurdly, they didn't even know where it had been placed.
Extra guards had been stationed at the palace gates, and everyone entering was rigorously searched. During that period, relatives of the imperial consorts had been forbidden from visiting.
The palace walls were also heavily guarded, ensuring not even a bird could fly in.
Extra guards had been assigned to the Imperial Kitchen as well, and the cooks were watched even while stir-frying dishes.
Despite all these measures, Emperor Deyuan had been drugged again within a few days. He had labored for an entire day and night before the effects finally wore off.
It had left Emperor Deyuan wary even while eating, terrified that he might fall victim again at any moment.
Since the case concerned Emperor Deyuan's sexual happiness and health, it had been assigned the highest priority and had to be solved within the month. Yet the month was nearly over, and the Embroidered Uniform Guard still had no leads.
The Imperial Kitchen had been searched from top to bottom, revealing nothing. Every time palace maids and eunuchs returned from outside, the Imperial Guards made them strip completely for inspection before allowing them through. Still, no one knew how the forbidden drug had been brought into the palace.
Jian Ruonan ate as she listened, offering a running commentary in her mind.
[Is Emperor Deyuan having trouble getting it up? His consorts actually have to drug him in secret? Tsk, tsk, tsk.]
[Whoever's doing this is ruthless, feeding the emperor drugs every few days. Are they raising him as a breeding stallion?]
[I wonder which is stronger-the drug the emperor took, or my potent aphrodisiac?]
Jian Zhang: "..."
Fortunately, no one else could hear such outrageously disrespectful words. If the Fourth Prince heard them, it would be a crime punishable by confiscation of their property and extermination of their entire clan!
[The imperial consorts really have it rough, risking beheading just to have a son... But consorts with children and those without really do receive vastly different treatment. No wonder they're willing to walk such a dangerous path.]
After the emperor died, consorts with sons could accompany them to their fiefs and enjoy their remaining years in comfort. Those without children would all be sent to an imperial temple, spending the rest of their lives with a dim lamp and ancient Buddha statues.
Women in the imperial harem didn't live nearly as glamorous a life as people imagined. Those who fared poorly could even be bullied by palace maids and eunuchs. No wonder every one of them sharpened her head to squeeze her way to the emperor's side.
Jian Ruonan considered whether selling her Multiple-Birth Pills and potent aphrodisiac to the imperial consorts might let her rake in a fortune.
[Father had better not send me to a consort selection! Not even to become a prince's consort!]
Teng thought, Fifth Sister, you're so lazy and greedy for food. You sleep until late morning every day and don't have a single artistic talent. Don't worry. No prince would fancy you.
Jian Zhang had never considered marrying Nannan to a prince either. The imperial family's scheming and infighting wouldn't suit such a pure, lovely girl.
He made a show of analyzing how the forbidden drug might have entered the palace, while actually listening closely to Nannan's thoughts.
[How did they get this drug inside? Come on, let me take a look.]
Excellent. The case would be solved any moment now!
Jian Zhang half-closed his eyes, pretending to ponder.
Solving this case would bring him to the emperor's attention. He might even become one of the emperor's favorites.
Teng held a pastry and nibbled it in little bites, his big, dark eyes darting about.
[Huh? It wasn't an imperial consort who administered the drug...]
Dantai Mo cast a casual glance at Jian Ruonan.
The Embroidered Uniform Guard had focused on the imperial consorts from the very beginning. So it hadn't been one of them after all.
Jian Ruonan was eating a yellow pea cake, crumbs covering the corners of her mouth. Whatever she saw made her suddenly open her mouth, and the cake fell out.
[??? A eunuch administered the drug...]
Dantai Mo: ??
[They actually brought the drug into the palace like this!!]
[No wonder stripping them naked didn't reveal anything. They hid the drug in their "chrysanthemum" to smuggle it into the palace!]
Dantai Mo: ??
Chrysanthemum?
How could a chrysanthemum conceal drugs?
It was only August, and the case had begun in July, before chrysanthemums bloomed. There hadn't even been any chrysanthemums. How could they have hidden drugs in them?
Jian Zhang's brows drew tightly together.
[The emperor took the drug, and the drug was stuffed up someone's chrysanthemum. So that more or less means the emperor ate shit?]
[Pfft-]
Before you continue