Good lord, after hearing Melinda's opinion, Coulson could only cry out, "Good lord!"
Because according to Melinda, Evenson was about to become a god. As someone with at least some Christian faith, Coulson found that hard to accept. What was that supposed to mean? Was not acting like a human being some shortcut to godhood? Besides, what god could Evenson possibly become? The god of bankruptcy and ruined households? Or the god of bad luck and stinginess?
"He'd better choose godhood!" Melinda said decisively. "If, after examining himself, he decides that he's human, then we'll have a huge problem!"
Why? Because even animals at the top of the food chain were still animals. Gods, however, had completely transcended that relationship. They simply couldn't be bothered to keep playing along with the human world anymore. I'm flying off, suckers! As for gods loving all people, it sounded wonderful at first, but when you thought about it carefully, it made no sense at all.
When mortals became gods—when they cultivated immortality—what were they after? In the legends Melinda had heard, it was usually immortality. And why seek immortality? Because of a mortal's inferiority complex and disgust with being mortal. In those legends, such people would first seek wise masters and noble friends. After suffering countless hardships, they would encounter an enlightened master in some ancient forest that might as well have been a nature reserve. Then came kneeling for ages, then sincere devotion moving heaven, and finally the master pinching his fingers and declaring, "This child is fated to be my disciple." Only then could the immortal pat his head and shatter his crown—uh, no, tie his hair and grant him longevity.
After entering the sect, there were no years in cultivation. Scholar, maiden, painted-face, clown; immortal, tiger, dog; emptying the master's