Knocking the Mountain

When Chen Ping'an arrived at Iron Lock Well with his water buckets, he passed several breakfast stalls in Apricot Blossom Alley, and his stomach began growling without so much as a warning. But with his purse empty, the young man could only grit his teeth and queue for water. Three households stood ahead of him. When his turn finally came, Zhi Gui suddenly cut in with a small bucket in hand, and those behind her immediately took offense.

They did not quite start cursing, but their words were far from pleasant. Especially Granny Ma, a hunched old woman. Both her sons had made something of themselves, each owning a Dragon Kiln. Though their kilns were tiny, ranking at the bottom among the thirty-odd Dragon Kilns, they still counted as towering wealthy households in Apricot Blossom Alley. Yet for some reason, the old woman got along poorly with both daughters-in-law. Her sons and their wives had long since moved to Taoye Lane, while she continued living alone in the ancestral house in Apricot Blossom Alley. In the eyes of Chen Ping'an, Liu Xianyang, and their generation, Granny Ma had always been a terrifying elder. Her tongue was vicious, and she was especially stingy. Even the snow piled outside her courtyard gate in the dead of winter, she wished she could scoop into her own home. If children used the snow outside her door for a snowball fight, or snapped off the icicles beneath her eaves, she could chase after them with a broom, cursing and beating them through several streets without tiring.

Back in the day, among the alleys on the western side of town, only Gu Can's mother could probably suppress Granny Ma's arrogance. Now Widow Gu had supposedly followed some distant relative of her dead husband back to her husband's hometown. Granny Ma, who had grown a little more kind-faced over the years, immediately sprang back to life and returned to the fray. She found everyone displeasing. Now that Song Jixin's maidservant had pulled this stunt, Granny Ma instantly began speaking in a sarcastic, yin-yang tone. Her voice was not loud, and her smile did not reach her eyes. Deliberately chatting with the women beside her, she said that certain young ladies could finally have their faces opened and plucked. After all, they could not even walk with their legs together anymore. What a joyous occasion. At last, they no longer had the body of a miss and the fate of a maidservant; now they could openly be called Madam.

Chen Ping'an's scalp prickled, but he could not very well drive away Zhi Gui, who had been in the wrong first. They had been neighbors for so many years, after all. After filling Liu Xianyang's two buckets, he quickly hauled up a bucket for her as well, thinking to leave this nest of chattering women as soon as possible. Seeing that the little bitch of a maid from the Song Family was pretending not to hear, Granny Ma became even more enraged.

This was how masters crossed blows: what they feared most was an opponent who refused to take the move. No matter how superb one's martial arts, there would be nowhere to set one's feet.

Whenever the old woman had quarreled with that slutty fox, Widow Gu, she might have lost, but afterward she always felt her skills had improved, certain that next time she could win back her dignity. How could she compare to this little slut from Mud Bottle Alley? Every time, the girl deliberately kept silent. Yet every time the girl left, the look in her eyes carried an implication that made the old woman intensely uncomfortable. It made Granny Ma's teeth itch with hatred. She dearly wanted to rush over and claw the girl's face into a mess, so that the young men and sturdy grown men of the nearby alleys would stop wishing they could hang their very souls from that shameless maidservant's waist.

Especially her grandson. Though everyone else saw him as a fool, lately even she, his grandmother, felt that the boy had truly gone mad. All day long, he spouted nonsense, forever saying that one day he would marry this maidservant from Mud Bottle Alley as his wife, then punch a hole through the heavens.

When the hateful girl showed no response, Granny Ma turned her attention to the impoverished young man. Clicking her tongue, she said, "You worthless mud-born wretch. You got your parents killed and still have the face to live in this world. Knowing you're destined to never amount to anything or marry a wife, you shamelessly cozy up to someone else's maidservant. You really are a heaven-made pair of dog man and dog woman. You might as well get together. Mud Bottle Alley is where trash and lowborn bastards live anyway. Maybe the children you have in the future will truly be able to rule Mud Bottle Alley like kings."

Chen Ping'an thought for a moment, then bent down, about to set down the carrying pole on his shoulders.

But maidservant Zhi Gui had already set down her bucket and strode toward the fearless old woman. Without a word, the girl slapped her. The blow spun Granny Ma around on the spot, leaving her dizzy. Only the women beside her caught her before she fell. Before the old woman recovered her senses, Zhi Gui stepped forward again and smacked her across the face. The girl cursed, "You old thing that should have died long ago! I've put up with you for a long time!"

The old woman shook her head, smoke practically pouring from her seven orifices with rage. Just as she was about to strike back, perhaps it was an illusion, but the support of the two women beside her was simply too attentive, leaving her unable to break free. As a result, she suffered a third humiliation. The maidservant struck for a third time, curling her fingers and rapping the old woman's forehead as hard as she could. "If you dare curse people again, I'll rip out the tongue of you long-tongued shrew. For every word you curse, I'll prick you once with a needle!"

The old woman was badly frightened. She actually forgot to curse back, much less retaliate.

The girl turned and hurried away. Discovering that her neighboring young man was already carrying her water bucket for her, she smiled and returned with him to Mud Bottle Alley.

Before Chen Ping'an could speak, the girl cut off his words. "Don't thank me. My cursing had nothing to do with you."

Chen Ping'an had no reply.

With empty hands, the girl muttered to herself, evidently never having considered taking her water bucket back from the straw-sandaled youth.

Beside the pulley at Iron Lock Well, the old woman sat on the ground and wailed, "That little bitch deserves to be chopped into a thousand pieces! Heaven will punish her... My life is so bitter! Heaven has no eyes! Why doesn't it send down a bolt of lightning to strike that little slut dead..."

The girl's steps were light and brisk. Her hands pushed upward toward the sky, over and over, in a very strange gesture.

Fortunately, Chen Ping'an had been neighbors with her for so many years, so he did not find it strange.

When the two passed the breakfast stalls, Chen Ping'an saw a familiar figure from behind. She was not tall, dressed in green, and was buying freshly steamed meat buns. Steam billowed from them, their fragrance drifting down the entire street.

Chen Ping'an

This morning, sometime without anyone noticing, the clouds had sunk low. They were exceptionally thick, like a rich family's enormous quilt spread out there in the sun.

Rumble! Thunder boomed over the little town.

At Iron Lock Well, Granny Ma nimbly scrambled to her feet and hurried home. Her small bucket swayed back and forth, spilling well water all along the way. By the time she got home, there probably would not be half a bucket left.

Perhaps the old woman knew perfectly well that if Heaven truly opened its eyes, the first bolt of lightning to strike would most likely land on her head.

After hearing the thunder, Chen Ping'an raised his head and looked up, somewhat puzzled. It did not seem like rain was coming.

The girl smiled sweetly. "My young master said he read in a book that at the beginning of every spring, a Heavenly God clad in golden armor beats drums amid the clouds, bidding farewell to the old and welcoming the new, intimidating all evil to herald the new spring."

Chen Ping'an nodded. "Your young master really has read a lot."

The girl sighed. "Everything about my young master is good, except that he's a little lazy. Also, he likes cursing at Heaven. I don't think that's good."

Chen Ping'an was not in the habit of speaking ill of others behind their backs, so he said nothing. His neighbor Song Jixin had a strange habit he had maintained for years: cursing at Heaven. He was much the same as Granny Ma, always cursing that thieving Heaven for having no eyes and the like. But scholars had a scholar's particular rules. On snowy nights, during thunderstorms, and when colorful clouds filled the horizon, those were Song Jixin's three times when he would not curse. He said he wanted to curse Heaven while it was dozing, so that Heaven would not hear and would not get angry. Then Song Jixin himself could vent his anger and feel better. Killing two birds with one stone.

Seeing that Chen Ping'an was not joining in, Zhi Gui said seemingly casually, "You didn't go home last night. You went to Liu Xianyang's place?"

Chen Ping'an nodded. "There were guests at home. It wasn't convenient."

She suddenly asked, "By the way, did Mr. Qi meet with you and say anything?"

Chen Ping'an asked in return, "Why do you ask?"

She smiled with innocent sweetness. "Just asking. When I went out for water this morning, I happened to run into Mr. Qi. He said he was taking a morning walk, and he asked whether you were home. So I answered truthfully."

Chen Ping'an smiled. "I ran into Mr. Qi by chance before, and he spoke with me about a few ordinary matters. More or less, he meant that Liu Xianyang and I should have gone to the school to study back then. I could only say that my family was poor and there was nothing to be done. Otherwise, I would have wanted to study too."

Zhi Gui asked doubtfully, "Is that so?"

Chen Ping'an looked into her eyes and asked with a smile, "What else did you think it was?"

She merely smiled it off.

The two parted at the street corner. Zhi Gui took the bucket and headed for Mud Bottle Alley, while Chen Ping'an returned to Liu Xianyang's home. After that, he still had to go to the East Gate to collect family letters. One letter cost one coin. If he had gotten this business earlier, with the strength in Chen Ping'an's legs to run through the mountains within a hundred li, he probably would have already saved enough for a wife.

At the entrance to Mud Bottle Alley, Zhi Gui saw her young master standing there, yawning.

She hurried over and asked curiously, "Young Master, why did you come out?"

Song Jixin slowly stretched his body and said lazily, "It was boring staying there."

She asked softly, "Young Master, when will the new Supervising Official return to town? After that, can we go to the capital?"

Song Jixin thought for a moment. "Within ten days or so."

Zhi Gui hesitated, and the little bucket in her hand swayed along with her.

Song Jixin asked with a smile, "What's wrong? Got a Heart's Matter?"

She said timidly, "Young Master, could you lend me that local County Annals to look at? Just for one or two nights. I want to learn some characters, so that when we get to that capital, people won't look down on me. Then I might make Young Master a laughingstock too."

Song Jixin laughed in surprise. After considering it briefly, he said, "What's there to be embarrassed about? But remember to wash your hands clean before opening the book. Don't get dirt on the pages, and be careful not to drip candle wax on it. Other than that, there's nothing else to mind. It's just a lousy book that says 'and that was the end of it.'"

Zhi Gui beamed. "This slave girl thanks Young Master!"

Song Jixin laughed heartily. "Come, come, I'll carry your water for you."

Zhi Gui dodged aside and said solemnly, "Young Master! Didn't we agree that a gentleman stays far from the kitchen? How can Young Master touch these trivial chores? If word gets out, the neighbors will point at my spine and curse me!"

Song Jixin laughed in irritation. "Rules, principles, rites—those things can fool and frighten other people. But this young master of yours..."

At this point, the Reading Seed who had grown up in a shabby alley did not continue.

She asked curiously, "What is Young Master?"

Song Jixin resumed his carefree smile and pointed at himself. "This young master of yours is really just a farmer. Divide a field into ridges and rows, then have people sow the seeds and divert water to irrigate it. I just sit and wait for the harvest. Year after year, that's all there is to it!"

She was thoroughly confused.

Song Jixin burst into laughter.

The young man suddenly reined in his smile and said earnestly, "Zhi Gui, did the one surnamed Chen carry your water bucket all the way?"

The maidservant nodded, her eyes innocent.

The young man said with great sincerity, "A Sage once said that treating a little kindness from strangers as a rare treasure, yet regarding all the efforts of those close by as only natural and turning a blind eye to them, is wrong."

The maidservant looked even more bewildered. "Huh?"

The young man rubbed his chin and muttered to himself, "She didn't even catch the meaning beneath my words. How is this young master supposed to continue? When we get to the capital, do I need to replace her with a prettier, cleverer, more thoughtful little maidservant?"

The maidservant could not help laughing aloud. She paid no heed to her young master's threat and exposed the truth. "Young Master actually wanted me to ask who this Sage of great learning was, right? Young Master, I know. It was you!"

Song Jixin laughed openly. "The one who knows me is Zhi Gui!"

Inside the school study, the middle-aged Confucian scholar sat upright and proper. All the black and white Chess Pieces on the board before him turned to dust amid the spring thunder.

When the children of the little town caught Stone Flatfish in the creek, they had a method: strike the stones in the stream heavily with an iron hammer, and the fish hiding beneath the rocks would be stunned and float to the surface.

It had much the same marvelous effect as the saying, knocking the mountain to shake the tiger.

But if one wished to warn a Sage not to defy Heaven and act against the great principles of the Dao,

then among Heaven and Earth, the only Heavy Item worthy of such a status was likely the mighty thunder of Heaven.