In the Hokage Building next to the Ninja Academy, the Third Hokage was making strange noises in the restroom.
"Heh heh heh..."
"Heh heh heh heh..."
Ahem. The correct answer was that the Third Hokage was squatting on the toilet, reading a thin little book.
As for its contents, well, that was the sort of thing that could not be spoken of.
"Heh heh, Jiraiya really understands me. How could Orochimaru's research reports possibly be as good as this?"
"Shocking! The Third Hokage hid in the restroom to read a book like this!"
"Teacher C's new photo collection is really bold..."
(No need to say what kind of teacher she was, or you might search it up and end up malnourished.)
"The Ninja Academy is on fire!"
The sudden booming shout made the Third Hokage's hands jerk, sending the little *book he had barely begun reading straight into the toilet.
"???"
The Third Hokage stared blankly at his empty hands, completely stunned.
"What Ninja Academy?" He reached into the toilet and found that it had not fallen too deep.
"Huh? What's on fire?"
"The Ninja Academy is on fire!"
The Third Hokage, who had just picked up the little *book, had his hands twitch again.
This time, he was not as lucky as before.
That book, which was nothing but mosaics in the eyes of children, fell directly into the bottomless pit.
"Pfft... My Teacher C..." A grief-stricken howl came from the restroom.
Not long after Nishinodera shouted about the fire, Anbu members arrived at the scene.
"What exactly happened? How did a perfectly fine school suddenly catch fire?" The Third Hokage arrived shortly after the Anbu.
"I only just found out myself. The students told me when they were leaving. Luckily, nearly all the students had already evacuated," Nishinodera answered blankly.
The Third Hokage immediately asked anxiously, "Then do you know what happened?"
Only then did Nishinodera snap back to his senses.
He looked at the classroom being devoured by flames and gritted his teeth. "It was Uchiha Shin. That brat even said he set the fire himself, and that anyone with a problem should come straight to him."
"???"
The Third Hokage and the Anbu all wore expressions like black guy question mark.JPG.
"But Akimichi Heiji said all that. I have no idea whether it's true or not," Nishinodera added.
"Why does this feel so strangely familiar?" The Third Hokage felt like he had encountered something like this before.
"Right, wasn't he the one who said that young master Senju liked men?"
Realizing this, the Third Hokage immediately ordered the Anbu, "Go put out the fire! If it keeps burning, the whole school will be gone!"
Upon receiving the order, the Anbu vanished one after another.
They were all going to moonlight as Konoha firefighters now.
"My head hurts, my head hurts. Haru only reminded us yesterday to take proper fire prevention measures, and the school caught fire today?"
"That child really knows how to cause trouble..."
The Third Hokage rubbed his temples, looking utterly exhausted.
Over the past month, from the abnormalities in Amegakure, to the collapse of Uchiha Commercial Street, and now the Ninja Academy fire.
Why did bad things keep happening one after another?
"Third Hokage, the fire has been extinguished." An Anbu member knelt on one knee and reported the situation.
The Third Hokage could only put aside his worries and deal with the immediate matter first. "Good. Have you found the cause of the fire?"
"There are traces of a large number of Fire Release ninjutsu at the scene. Based on visual estimates, at least ten Fire Release techniques would have been needed to cause such a blaze."
"More than ten? Haru, do you think a five-year-old child could possess that much Chakra?" The Third Hokage asked to no one in particular.
"If it were anyone else, I would not dare say for sure. But if that child really set the fire, I would not find it strange at all." Haru appeared beside him.
"Your basis?"
"Based on the intelligence currently available, that child seems to have been born with a rather nasty personality..."
"And a few weeks ago, the Anbu received intelligence that the Uchiha Clan Head chased that child around the clan grounds for an entire night..."
In the same emotionless tone as ever, Haru concluded, "Perhaps he harbored resentment because of that and committed such a retaliatory act."
"He burned down the school just because he felt wronged? He really is a child." After hearing the analysis, the Third Hokage could not help shaking his head with a bitter smile.
"Third Hokage, should I bring this child in?"
"What would you go for? It was just a child venting his frustrations. Besides, no students were hurt. Another day, just invite Chiken Clan Head to the office for some tea."
In the Third Hokage's eyes, this was merely a little incident of a child lacking fatherly love setting fire to vent his anger.
Looking at it that way, even that slap from the sky that wiped out the Shopping Street last time seemed explainable.
If Shin knew that his carefully planned Plan B had been interpreted by some headache-ridden old man as a child's tantrum, who knew what he would think.
"Pull a squad from the construction team at Uchiha Commercial Street and renovate the school..."
"Take this opportunity to give the school a thorough refurbishment. Also, notify the teachers that the children will be on holiday for the rest of the month."
"Yes!"
After properly handling the matter, the Third Hokage left the Ninja Academy, its outer walls blackened by soot.
He planned to go back and see whether he could still fish that little *book out.
At the Uchiha Clan Head's home, Mikoto was reporting the day's events to Chiken and Aoko.
"That is what happened, Clan Head." After finishing, Mikoto took her leave.
Why stay? To wait for the grim-faced Uchiha Clan Head to explode?
After Mikoto left, Chiken's fists clenched so tightly that his knuckles cracked.
Words were probably no longer enough to describe his anger at that moment.
"Dear..."
"Aoko, don't even think about pleading for him. It's only been one morning, and that brat has already caused more trouble!" Enraged, Chiken swiftly cut her off.
"No, I wasn't going to plead for him. It's just that, based on what Mikoto said, Shin seems to have gotten together with that little girl from the Hyuga clan?"
Aoko's attention was clearly not on her younger son setting fire to the school.
Chiken was utterly defeated by her. "The point isn't that little girl! It's the trouble that brat caused!"
Aoko curled her lip at him in disdain. "That's all? I thought he blew up the school. Wasn't that what he sang this morning?"
"Right, what's going on with that brat? He only set a fire and left it at that?" Chiken came to his senses and began to wonder.
"Maybe it was too difficult? We can ask Shin when he comes back."
Aoko's tolerance was clearly much higher than Chiken's.
Compared to wiping out an entire street, she considered this a minor problem.
"My head hurts! Even the school can't keep that brat under control. What are we supposed to do?"
Having accepted reality, Chiken decided that if the Third Hokage came looking for trouble, he would just play dumb.
When Fugaku returned from the training grounds, he saw his parents wearing troubled expressions. "Father, Mother, did something happen?"
"It's Fugaku. Nothing major. Your younger brother set fire to the school and burned it down."
Hearing Chiken state such a shocking matter in such a calm tone, Fugaku could not help marveling inwardly at how surreal the world was.
What kind of person could calmly say something as major as setting fire to a school?
It could only be said that their family had grown accustomed to such things lately.
If Konoha were blown away one day, their family would probably be able to face it calmly too.
(Deva Path Pain: How many floors do I need to carry a sack of rice up?)
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