Type-Moon's Problem Child from Collapse

The waiter looked at the dishes they had ordered. Given his position, he normally wouldn't say anything, but the three of them were simply too good-looking.

"Um, the dish this Father ordered has a very strong flavor. Are you sure you want this?"

Fu Yuan looked at the waiter as if he didn't believe him. He was about to scoop another spoonful when he suddenly noticed that the Mage of the Mapo Tofu had already placed his hand over his own bowl, so naturally that it wasn't awkward at all.

Fu Yuan glanced at it, confirmed he had no chance to scoop any, and then said helplessly to the waiter, "Yeah, that's the flavor. Make it very, very spicy."

The waiter still hesitated. He had tried this dish himself out of curiosity before, and ended up lying in bed for several days. But under the direct gaze of the bishoujo in front of him, he finally nodded.

"Understood. Your food will be ready soon."

"A Yuan, are you sure you can eat that?" Irisviel looked at the thick layer of red chili oil on top. Just looking at it felt spicy.

Little Illya, on the other hand, was very curious and secretly made a decision—she would definitely sneak a spoonful later.

While Fu Yuan and the others were chatting, Kirei Kotomine was also watching them from the shadows. After all, the man he had always wanted to meet, Kiritsugu Emiya, was part of their group.

Fu Yuan tilted his head, looking at Kirei Kotomine with some confusion. The [Child of Purity] talent had always felt rather useless to Fu Yuan, but it did have some use in small matters like this.

"Mister Mage of the Mapo Tofu, is something the matter?" But if he had doubts, he voiced them; if he didn't understand, he asked—that had always been Fu Yuan's good habit.

"...Is it really alright for you to bring a child to participate in the Holy Grail War?" Kirei Kotomine was silent for a long time before finally deciding to ask. In his view, that man shouldn't do something so pointless.

'No, it's not alright. But there's no better way.' Faced with this question, Irisviel didn't know how to answer.

"Why don't you give it a try, Mister Mage of the Mapo Tofu?" Fu Yuan, on the other hand, had no such concerns and instead asked back with some interest.

'Try what? Bringing up a child? A pointless thing.' Kirei Kotomine thought of his own daughter, but he didn't take Fu Yuan's words to heart at all.

'Wait. Was there something strange about how he just addressed me?'

Fu Yuan didn't notice his expression at all, instead growing more excited as he spoke: "Really, Mister Mage of the Mapo Tofu, children are angels! Especially daughters!"

"Children are simply treasures bestowed by heaven." At this point, Fu Yuan paused, then looked at Kirei Kotomine and said with sudden seriousness.

"Especially for someone like you! Just like Kiritsugu, they can truly save a person!"

Kirei Kotomine heard Saber's somewhat meaningful words and reluctantly stored them in his heart. 'That man can be saved too?'

"Children, huh?"

'Maybe I could try it. Kallen is six years old now, isn't she?'

Kirei Kotomine suddenly became interested and was about to ask Saber about children when he saw that he had already started eating.

He fell silent for a moment and quietly filed the matter away in his mind.

Irisviel looked at Fu Yuan speechlessly. That wasn't what you said when you offered to buy homework for Illya before.

Illya: ?! 'Is this what Dad always calls differential treatment?'

Little Illya didn't yet know what this behavior was called. When she grew up, she would learn a new word for it—double standards.

Chapter 16: So This Is What They Mean by Signing Means Going Off the Shelves! I Understand! I Want to Cultivate Immortality!

Fu Yuan lay alone on the bed, curling himself into a small ball while covering his head with the blanket, as if that would block out the thunder outside.

The mission was already complete. Because of the bad weather, he hadn't even stopped at any shops along the way. After slaying the demon beast, he quickly returned to the mountain, but unfortunately, he was still a little late. He could only make do for the night at this inn.

His master had a knack for choosing timing. His senior sister had her own matters to attend to, and his senior brother wasn't willing to help him, so this time down the mountain, he was alone.

He didn't blame his master. After all, his master ultimately meant well for him. But thunder was really terrifying! Every clap seemed to send him back to the moment of his transmigration.

Shennongjia. This was the first time Fu Yuan had traveled alone since he was a child—if one ignored the dozen or so bodyguards lurking in the shadows.

The beautiful mountain scenery, the tall trees of all kinds—Fu Yuan felt as if he had been set free.

Ding. Gods System beginning to bind.

Bind? Yes/No

Fu Yuan blinked. He realized that even with his eyes closed, he could still see this light screen. He felt a little excited. Although he was often called an idiot by others, he still read novels, especially the very popular system novels of recent years.

'A system! It can definitely fix my fear of thunder, right?'

Bind? Yes/No

"Mhm mhm!" Fu Yuan quickly nodded his head. To be safe in case it was voice-activated, he even said it out loud.

Binding started.

1%

10%

50%

Fu Yuan stood there dumbly, staring expectantly at the data only he could see.

Ding. Extremely high-quality talent detected. Requesting inspection permissions.

'So polite!' It probably wasn't one of those old-school systems from Qidian. Fu Yuan compared it to the novels he had read and came to a conclusion.

"Mhm mhm!" Who wouldn't like such a polite system?

75%

Talent: [Eternal Memory (Fragmented)]: Because it is incomplete, the body does not have the function of constant memory, nor can it even permanently fix memories. However, it still grants high Soul Resistance and extremely superior memory.

Ding, detected a ?-quality talent. Requesting permission for in-depth inspection.

'As expected, A Yuan is no ordinary person. Next up should be saving the world, right?' Fu Yuan began to fantasize about his future while feeling even more grateful to this polite system.

"Mm!"

Ding, inspecting. In-depth coverage in progress...

Ding, inspecting. In-depth coverage in progress...

Ding, inspecting. In-depth coverage in progress...

As if frozen, the entire interface stalled on that single line. Fu Yuan suddenly had an ominous premonition.

Ding, coverage complete.

The interface stopped completely at that moment, with no further movement afterward.

But Fu Yuan no longer cared about that. Every hair on his body stood on end as the greatest sense of crisis he had felt since birth flooded his mind.

Then, from a clear sky, a bolt of Heavenly Thunder—or rather, Heavenly Punishment—struck down, enough to kill a person countless times over!

His whole body went rigid. Even though his mind kept telling him to dodge, he stood frozen, utterly incapable of resisting.

'Move! Move!'

And that perception he had always been so proud of—at this moment, he loathed it with all his being.

He could clearly sense the lightning striking his body, yet for some reason, he did not die instantly.

It hurt terribly, but he could not make a sound. His body's Electric Particles went haywire, and he distinctly felt the destruction of his throat, blood vessels, and liver, the charring of every muscle, the separation of every piece of flesh and blood.

By scientific logic—no, ever since he got the system, this had ceased to be scientific.

He felt himself slowly disappearing, decomposing step by step. Despair, collapse—all of it wrapped around him.

It seemed slow, but to the outside world, it all happened in an instant. Even the bodyguards had no time to react before Fu Yuan vanished completely from this world.

And the system, having fulfilled its mission, began to self-destruct.

The energy that had kept his body from disintegrating in that instant seemed to have some left over, and it played its final role.

At the foot of Honkai Taixu Mountain

An unconscious infant suddenly appeared there, falling from half a meter in the air and hitting the ground hard. Strangely, the child inside did not cry or even make a sound, making one wonder if it was a stillborn.

'It hurts!' That was Fu Yuan's first reaction. Even though it was not his first time experiencing it, the pain was still hard to bear. But fortunately, he had some resistance.

So Fu Yuan quickly came to his senses, immediately broke free from Archer's embrace, and ran to his own spot. He crossed his arms over his chest and stared warily at the Archer across from him.

His childish face was filled with three parts shyness, three parts anger, three parts confusion, and ninety-one parts grievance. Having his soul attacked really hurt.

Archer slowly came back to her senses, rubbing her head with her delicate white hands. Then, with three parts anger, three parts amusement, three parts pleasure, and ninety-one parts curiosity, she looked at the Saber she had just ravaged.

"I must say, Saber, you've successfully piqued my interest."

Unlike before, this time it was genuine interest—not sexual interest!

Beside them, Irisviel had no idea how to interject. She sat there dumbly, then belatedly covered Illya's eyes.

Illya: ?

"...Pervert." Fu Yuan's expression twisted. After all, a minute ago, the two of them had been 'fiercely embracing and kissing,' and he had been forcibly kissed for the first time by a non-human who had been a man just a minute earlier. He had always thought his heart was strong enough to handle many things, but reality told him he had been overthinking it.

Archer let out a light snort at this, then leaned her entire body forward, her two heavy mounds pressed and deformed by the table.

"Mongrel, have you thought about how to compensate This King?" Archer assessed the current situation. The Fountain of Youth was among the highest-tier treasures in her treasury, and while she had things that could cancel other treasures, none were of a higher grade than the Fountain of Youth.

So, she could not change back—at least not during this Holy Grail War. Logically, something beyond her control should have been interesting, but only if it did not happen to her.

Still, she forcibly suppressed her anger. Crisis management was a necessary skill for a king, so as compensation, Saber was hers for the taking.

"Pervert! Hentai!"

Fu Yuan had thought through many unexpected scenarios for the Holy Grail War yesterday—like some overpowered interloper barging in, or an agent of the Counter Force coming to erase him... but having his purity sullied was something he had never considered.

'Ugh—don't think about it! So embarrassing!'

His small, fair hands suddenly covered his face, giving off an air of 'if I can't see you, you can't see me.'

'...Junior Disciple Brother~' Fortunately, Fu Yuan had his own alarm system. Whenever he started acting a little off, Senior Sister would always remind him in time—though her methods were a bit rough.

"Another soul. How increasingly interesting!" Archer said this in a perfectly calm tone, something even Caster could not see through, then thought of her close friend.

Speaking of close friends, Archer suddenly remembered why she had come here. She looked around and realized Kirei Kotomine had already left.

Archer frowned, mentally marking Kirei Kotomine with an X. Then she looked at Saber, and without waiting for Fu Yuan to respond, she spoke arrogantly, uttering words that would make any pure-hearted warrior's heart ache.

"So, Saber, you're mine. Let's see if that close friend of yours can stop me!"

Then she vanished into spirit particles. Fortunately, Irisviel had set up Suggestion Sorcery around the area beforehand, or tomorrow's headlines might have been something else.

"Shock! A certain woman ascends to heaven on the spot after a passionate encounter. Is this a moral elevation or an evolution of humanity? Tune in to Fuyuki City's Punching Science (not a typo)."

Fu Yuan rubbed his head and slowly recovered from the second wave of stabbing pain. This really is a huge mess I've gotten myself into!

"Mom, that big brother... sister left without eating! Is she an idiot?" Just then, clever Little Illya spotted the blind spot. Gilgamesh had sat in the restaurant for so long, yet left without eating anything at all.

As for spiritualization, Illya had already seen it on Fu Yuan, who acted like a child himself, so she wasn't particularly surprised.

"Big brother... sister might not be hungry right now." Irisviel didn't know how to answer that either. Though she felt it wasn't simply a case of forgetting while putting on airs, Heroic Spirits were beyond common sense—who knew if they could even hear them talking!

Little Illya was a bit confused. If she wasn't hungry, why come to a restaurant! Illya tried to sort out the sequence of events with her little mind:

Big Sister came to the restaurant + willing to wait a while = hungry

Confessed to Big Brother + kissed = no need to eat = not hungry

Greedy Big Brother didn't finish the leftover food = full

!!! Illya felt she had discovered the truth. So kissing could fill your stomach! Was it that amazing! No wonder she often saw Dad and Mom doing it!

Irisviel watched Illya's slightly odd expression and fell into confusion again. She felt there might be something wrong with her factory settings, because otherwise, how could so many things happen that she couldn't understand?

Fu Yuan didn't notice Illya's strangeness. Right now, he was coaxing his Senior Sister, who had clearly been the one to hit him. So, I'm the one who got hurt here, alright.

You have a problem with that?

No, I swear, really!

Chapter 17: Lemon Head Evolves—Calm Lemon Head

At Fuyuki Bridge, a man with a lemon-shaped head and an extremely irritable expression was pondering how to withdraw from this war reasonably. Behind him, a handsome man whose behavior was as chivalrous as a knight stood guard seriously beside the lemon-headed man.

Meanwhile, a woman in extremely gaudy attire ignored the lemon head's displeased glare and continued to pester Diarmuid, whose expression remained unchanged.

Ever since Lancer had nearly fallen in battle the night before, Sola's behavior seemed to grow more aggressive. She completely ignored her fiancé's displeasure, and this situation left him so agitated that he couldn't think at all.