New Concept: Dao of Weirdness Ascends to Immortality
Chapter 23

Believe in Holy Light! Annual Leave Starts at 4 Days

2,303 words•8 min read•8 views
27d ago•

Walking to City Second Hospital, Yuan Zhu found an eighteen-story building painted white, utterly out of place amid the surrounding dark steam-industrial aesthetic.

In front of the medical building lay a spacious garden and fountain, while beyond them stood gates teeming with people. Business looked booming.

He even saw tall, burly brown Orcs lowering their heads and carefully queuing to enter, doing their best to tuck away their sawn-off tusks, terrified of brushing against anyone nearby.

Hmm... it had the flavor of America's civil rights movement in the 1950s. Mere Orcs actually had the money to visit a human master's hospital?!

Sure enough, if one looked carefully, one could spot Half-Elf mixed-bloods among the crowd, with pointed ears and more delicate skin. Unfortunately, their looks were utterly unremarkable, not much different from ordinary people.

Congcong, four hundred years had truly flown by in the blink of an eye! The descendants of those first-generation ancestral old elves had long since blended into this planet, becoming entirely new "Crystalline Wall Descendant Natives."

"If you're not going in, please don't block the way. Thank you!"

A faint pain shot through his calf, followed by a child's voice behind him. He turned around and saw nothing at first. Only after lowering his head did he discover a cat-eared little girl in a white nurse's uniform, hugging a small wooden box and glaring unhappily at him for blocking her path.

"Eh? You look so strange. So cute."

It was his first time encountering this sort of catgirl, and he found her incredibly novel. It was like a large plush doll suddenly opening its mouth and speaking. His soul of petting cats ignited in an instant.

The cat-eared nurse rolled her eyes in fury. "If you don't know how to compliment people, then don't. Thank you! And move aside!"

Yuan Zhu stepped aside and made way for the strange little catgirl nurse. "Um, are you an adult? No, I mean, how do I get to the Holy Light Department?"

The little catgirl stomped away angrily. Thump, thump, thump... Her steps were quick, but her legs were too short, so she still moved slowly. "I'm an adult already! The Holy Light Department is on the third floor. Turn left at the stairway exit. There are signs on the wall. Look for yourself."

"Thank you." Yuan Zhu had no idea how he had offended her. He suppressed his soul of petting cats and watched the little catgirl leave with great reluctance.

The Little Elf suddenly popped out and said regretfully, "I really want to Rua her hard!"

Once he reached the third floor, Yuan Zhu observed his surroundings as he walked. He found that Running's hospitals were not all that different from those back on Earth. Aside from the mainstream Chinese and Western medical systems, there were also additional, rather unconventional systems such as the Holy Light Department, Witch Doctor Department, Inner Fasting Department, Spirit Communication Department, and Alchemy Department.

Because gods existed in this world, these departments all possessed genuine abilities. From different fields, they could treat evil spirit possession, lost-soul syndrome, contamination infections... and so on.

If they encountered difficult, complicated, and baffling illnesses, multiple departments would conduct joint treatment. Acupuncture, scalpels, spirit dancing... a multidimensional, three-dimensional assault to eradicate the Disease Demon right there in the operating room.

After Yuan Zhu showed his medical card to a nurse, an ordinary-looking aunt led him into a consultation room.

An incense burner sat on the table in the center of the room, with a stick of thread incense that calmed the mind and soothed the spirit. Against the wall on the desk stood a rosewood shrine, housing a white jade Bodhisattva statue.

The attending physician across the table was a blond, blue-eyed Caucasian man in a white coat, wearing gold-rimmed glasses and holding a cup of fragrant tea.

"Please sit. I'm your attending physician, Lucius, a dispatched deacon from the eastern New Continent. Since I graduated from medical school, I hold consultations at City Second Hospital while spreading faith for my lord as a side job. Where do you feel unwell? This medical card of yours was issued jointly by our Holy Temple and the Security Bureau. Ordinary people cannot possess one." Lucius spoke the local language without the slightest accent, sounding like a true local.

"I..." Yuan Zhu opened his mouth, unsure what to say.

"There's no need to worry. I've seen too many patients whose bodies were contaminated and who had unspeakable secrets. Not only did I graduate from the medical department and possess professional medical literacy, but I also studied at the Holy Temple for many years and have extensive experience expelling things with Holy Light. Finally, professional ethics require me to keep my patients' privacy confidential, so you needn't worry about me leaking your situation."

Lucius wore a kind and amiable expression. His smiling face seemed to radiate the light of humanity, making people instinctively want to draw close to him.

Beep beep beep! Mental intrusion detected. Blocked.

Having grown accustomed to all this, Yuan Zhu's expression did not reveal the slightest abnormality. Smiling politely, he replied, "For certain reasons, I became involved in an anomalous case. I previously underwent testing at the Security Bureau, and they all said I was very healthy. In the end, they gave me this medical card and told me to receive Holy Light treatment. If there are hidden dangers, treat them; if there's no problem, treat it as prevention."

Lucius raised an eyebrow. "I understand. Then shall we begin treatment directly, or would you like to chat first and let me sort through your mind and spirit? Oh, do you drink tea?" He pointed to his own teacup as he asked Yuan Zhu.

Yuan Zhu, who had never had a habit of drinking tea in either this life or the last, asked curiously, "Is tea also popular in your country?"

"When in Running, do as the Running people do. After I came here, a monk friend introduced me to it, and that's how I developed the habit. Once you get used to it, the flavor is quite nice." Lucius enthusiastically recommended it.

Yuan Zhu waved his hand in refusal, then looked at the white jade Bodhisattva on the table. "Was this also a gift from that friend? Can deacons of your Holy Temple worship Outer Gods from other religions?"

Lucius refuted him in confusion, "Freedom of belief—why not? According to New Federation regulations, a person may declare eleven legal beliefs each year. Although I am a Holy Temple deacon who wields Holy Light, since I live and work in Running, I can also believe in Outer Gods outside religion. Such as this Great Joy Bodhisattva."

What did you say? Where was she big? Where was she joyful? Yuan Zhu turned to look at the dignified, solemn white jade Guanyin statue. Only the tentacles exposed beneath her robes seemed slightly different from an orthodox Guanyin. And yet Lucius was telling him this was the "Great Joy Bodhisattva"? "Is your friend doing all right?"

Lucius shook his head. "Sigh, I haven't contacted him in two years. He was reported and wanted during the previous anti-Buddhist movement because he bewitched believers and personally explained the teachings to resolve their doubts, so he fled south. We still exchanged letters a few years ago, but then contact was cut off. Enough about him. The fact that you chose to come to the Holy Light Department to examine hidden dangers shows that you recognize the Holy Temple and recognize Holy Light in your heart. Then, are you interested in learning more about the Holy Temple and adding it to your list of legal beliefs?"

Yuan Zhu recalled that, because gods of all kinds ran rampant on Du Ling Star, a landscape of multiple pantheons coexisting had emerged in modern times.

Because the history of extraordinary powers spanned only a little over four hundred years, monotheism had found it difficult to survive and had not yet developed to the point of one dominant power in a region.

Once a divine civilization tried to shut its doors, lock its country away, and eat alone in a particular region, it would suffer a righteous gang beating from other righteous and evil gods. Thus, it had become common knowledge for ordinary people at the bottom of society to worship several gods at once, and even religions would not stop them.

In Running and Taixi, citizens could declare up to eleven legal beliefs. In truth, ordinary people could believe in as many gods as they wished. This declaration was mainly aimed at employees—those with jobs.

That was because "declaring legal beliefs" was directly linked to an employee's annual leave, and it was paid leave.

Different gods held festivals corresponding to their respective functions. Once someone took an interest in the theme or timing of a particular festival, they could look up information on that god in reverse, then include that god among their legal beliefs for the year and complete the declaration.

Then, when the following year's "XX Festival" arrived, they could not only enjoy the corresponding holiday, but also receive an additional blessing from that god when participating in the festival carnival. Best of all, it was paid leave, arranged by a god! That made it the biggest.

For example, there was a bachelor god codenamed God IIII, who held a fanatical hand-chopping festival every year on 11/11. Those who wished to participate only needed to add God IIII to their "annual belief list," and they could enjoy a legal holiday the next year to revel in the hand-chopping festival, along with a god-given buff of "Rationality -90%, Discounts × 9.8."

Running's citizens all had the right to select three to eleven legal gods according to their differing needs, forming their annual belief lists. Belief was not merely connected to the distribution of annual leave; it also came with additional divine buffs.

For example, people preparing for pregnancy would choose gods who governed fertility and health, but once the newborn was born, those gods would be abandoned.

Farm Owners, meanwhile, long favored gods who protected seeds, or the Whip God who increased Orc work efficiency. Once they believed, they believed for life, never regretting it even unto death.

Parents liked choosing suffering festivals for their children, things like "Raise IQ," "Ensure Passing," and "Zhang Xianzhong." Such beliefs often lasted throughout the child's entire student life.

Afterward, graduates would pick the Singlehood Escape God, the Contraception God, Rotten Peach Blossoms, the Beer God... and engage in retaliatory belief until their dicks could no longer stand proud. Only then would they return to the embrace of the Fishing God, the Six-Flavor Emperor God, the Anti-Hair-Loss God... and the like.

Lucius said, "According to Running's Holiday Act, believers in the Holy Temple are guaranteed three days of New Year's leave, plus the Festival of Light in July. That alone means annual legal leave starts at four days. In addition, as long as you believe in the Holy Temple, you receive one free Holy Light physical examination every year. If you maintain faith in the Holy Temple for more than three years, you may attend one internal secret sermon each month, with a ten-percent discount on additional purchases. Maintain your faith for nine years, and you become a true believer: one free physical examination every month, several bottles of Holy Water as a gift, and one annual family Holy Light checkup package. Maintain it for over twenty years, and you or your descendants may directly participate in the Holy Light Trial, come into contact with, and master Holy Light Power."

A sense of annual VIP membership packages, consecutive annual subscriptions, and corporate loyal-user plans rose before Yuan Zhu's eyes. The gods and beliefs of this world were simply too flexible, just like membership services launched by major websites on the Internet.

If you believed in a certain god, you could not only take part in the corresponding festival, but also enjoy festival benefits and divine buffs. Such buffs generally lasted only a short time.

But if you became a loyal believer-user, persisted year after year, and continuously accumulated faith points, the gods' blessing buffs would gradually solidify and become long-term passive effects.

As long as you did not switch to another god, the points in your account would not be reset to zero.

If this were Earth, Yuan Zhu felt that his QQ account alone could probably grant him an extraordinary buff and solidify it into a passive state similar to a "trait," ever accompanying his body. (The wealth he had spent recharging games all those years had truly changed into another form and accompanied him.) One major benefit of believing in the Holy Temple was that ordinary believers of over nine years could gather the weakest "Holy Light Protection buff" upon themselves without paying much, causing other evil spirits, when given a choice, to attack others first.

That alone attracted many latent believers. Furthermore, after maintaining faith in the Holy Temple for twenty years, one would have a chance to come into contact with Holy Light. Thus, if one registered a newborn infant under "Holy Temple faith," allowing the child to be steeped in and grow close to the Holy Temple from a young age, then after turning twenty, the child might have a chance to ascend to the heavens in a single step, joining the Holy Temple and coming into contact with and mastering Holy Light.

Yuan Zhu sighed. Why had he never possessed such luck? The beliefs of him and his brother changed every few years, all for the sake of taking advantage and freeloading benefits. No one had ever told him that persisting in Holy Temple faith meant an Extraordinary System would be taught to him for free.

End of Chapter
Novel
How was this translation?

Explore the wiki