My Youth Romantic Comedy Is Wrong, As I Expected

No man in the world could refuse a girl's request like that. They had their own considerations. After all, it was a joy to be asked for help; when a girl clasped her hands together to make a request, her swaying chest could make one lose all judgment; and everyone had a childhood dream of becoming a hero who saved others someday... In short, there were many reasons.

Hayama was no exception. He shrugged and replied, "I get it. If it's for that reason, then there's nothing we can do. I'm not exactly enthusiastic, but I'll give it a try... Yui, you work hard too."

After he finished speaking, he gently tapped Yuihama on the head. Wait, you're the one who needs to work hard, aren't you?

"Th-thank you..."

Yuihama touched the spot Hayama had tapped and replied.

And so, Yuihama's "Gigolo Hayama's Heart-Pounding Rom-Com Grand Operation" officially commenced. Who came up with that name? It's totally a Showa-era style.

The operation was simple.

Hayama was to use all his might and charm to capture Kawasaki's heart. That was all. Incidentally, "all his might" and "charm" were puns (Note 36: In the original text, both words are pronounced "moteru").

After packing our bags, we moved to the bicycle parking lot to wait for Kawasaki. Of course, it would look suspicious if we were seen with Hayama, so we observed secretly from a distance.

Then, the moment finally arrived.

Kawasaki, just as listless as yesterday, dragged her tired feet to the bicycle parking lot and stifled a yawn as she unlocked her bike. At this moment, Hayama seized the opportunity and appeared.

"You must be tired. You look sleepy."

He greeted Kawasaki gently. Although it was likely an act, it seemed so natural that even I, watching from the side, almost responded, "Oh, you must be tired."

"Are you heading to work? Don't push yourself too hard."

Such subtle concern... My god, Hayama is such a good guy. I was almost falling for him myself.

However, Kawasaki just yawned, then sighed and said, "Thank you for your concern. I'm heading home now."

Kawasaki's reaction was cold. She led her bicycle away. At this point, Hayama's voice called out from behind her again. His voice was so gentle, it seemed to melt the listener's heart.

"Um..."

Kawasaki stopped abruptly and turned to look at Hayama.

A cool early summer breeze blew between them. It seemed their rom-com had suddenly descended upon them. Yuihama eagerly leaned forward, clenching her sweaty hands; Zaimokuza, consumed by jealousy and hatred, clenched his fists filled with murderous intent.

When the cool breeze subsided, Hayama spoke to Kawasaki:

"Actually, you don't need to push yourself so hard, right?"

At this moment, he looked radiant, exuding a large amount of negative ions.

"Oh, I don't need your concern."

Clatter, clatter, clatter... Kawasaki pushed her bicycle and gradually moved away.

At this moment, time in Hayama's space completely froze. After about ten full seconds, he, left behind, awkwardly smiled and walked towards us.

"I feel like... I just got dumped."

"Ah, you must b-hehe..."

I was going to say "You must be tired," but the last two words got stuck in my throat, and an indescribable feeling brewed in my abdomen. Damn it! Hold it in, hold it in! I desperately tried to suppress this budding emotion, but the guy beside me broke first.

"Pfft, pfft-pfft... Gahahahahaha! Look at you, look at you! Showing off and then getting dumped! Pffft-hahahaha!"

"Stop it, Zai-hehehe..."

"You two, you can't laugh!"

Totsuka admonished us. I tried hard to restrain myself, but with Zaimokuza's burst of laughter, I couldn't hold back any longer.

"Oh well, it's fine, Totsuka. I won't mind."

Hayama said with a wry smile... He truly was a good person. He was willing to help us despite not being enthusiastic, and he even suffered unnecessary harm because of it.

Zaimokuza also felt Hayama's gentlemanly demeanor and stopped laughing. He cleared his throat and spoke again, "This Hayama... you don't need to... Pfft! You don't need to push yourself so hard! Wahahaha!"

"Idiot! Zaimokuza, you're not allowed to say that again! Don't make me laugh anymore!"

Zaimokuza and I burst into laughter again. Yuihama looked at us, her face completely stiff.

"These two are terrible..."

"This plan failed too. Well, we'll check out another place tonight."

"Yeah..."

Hoo... This was so much fun.

This was the first time I felt glad to have joined the Service Club.

× × ×

The hands of my watch pointed to 8:20.

We had agreed to meet in front of the pointy landmark at Mihama Ward Station. I was currently leaning against this thing everyone called the "pointy weird thing."

The place we were heading to tonight was "Angel's Ladder," a bar on the top floor of the Hotel Okura.

This is the last shop in Chiba City with "Angel" in its name that stays open until dawn. Moreover, this might be the first and only time I'll ever step foot into such a high-class establishment.

I adjusted the thin jacket I wasn't used to wearing, a garment I'd "borrowed" from my dad's closet. Fortunately, since we're roughly the same size, it fit me perfectly.

A colorful shirt with a black stand-up collar paired with jeans, and pointy leather shoes on my feet—this is not how I'd normally dress. To be honest, I don't pay much attention to clothes; besides the jeans I'm wearing, everything else is borrowed from my dad. I'd also tidied up my hair.

The stylist was Komachi Hikigaya.

I'd asked Komachi to help me put together an outfit that made me look more mature. After she rummaged through the closet, this is the result.

"Brother's eyes look like those of a tired office worker, so if we just do a little something with your clothes and hair, you'll look like an adult."

Hearing her say that, I didn't know how to react. Were my eyes really that bad?

The first to arrive at our meeting spot was Totsuka Saika.

"Sorry, did you wait long?"

"No, I just got here too."

Totsuka's outfit was full of androgynous sporty vibes. A T-shirt that fit just right, paired with loose work pants, and a beanie worn low on his head, with a pair of headphones hanging around his neck. Every step he took in his basketball shoes made the slightly shiny leather chain wallet jingle.

This was the first time I'd seen Totsuka in casual clothes, and I found myself staring without realizing it. For some reason, he bashfully pulled the brim of his hat down, trying to hide his eyes.

"N-no, don't keep staring at me... Is, is it weird like this?"

"No, it's not weird! It suits you really well."

I felt like this conversation was something out of a date scene, but unfortunately, Totsuka and I weren't on a date.

The evidence for this was Zaimokuza's subsequent arrival.

For some reason, he was wearing a matching set of work clothes and had a white towel wrapped around his head, so I decided to pretend I didn't see him for a moment.

"Hmm~ I remember the meeting spot was here... Oh! Isn't that Hachiman?"

He spoke in a deliberately affected manner, which only annoyed me further. But since he'd spotted me, there was no way I could keep playing dead.

"...What's with the outfit? And why do you have a towel wrapped around your head? Are you a ramen shop owner?"

"Hey, weren't you the ones who said I should dress like an adult? So, I chose work clothes and a headscarf to dress like an adult who's working."

Oh... so that was the concept behind his attire. Well, since he was here now, there was no point saying anything else. I could just ignore him later, so I didn't need to worry about it.

Just as I reached this conclusion, Yuihama's "tap, tap" footsteps approached.

She looked around as she pulled out her phone. Huh, she hadn't noticed us?

"Yuihama."

As soon as I called out to her, she jumped in surprise and looked over here guiltily. Hey, you were looking this way just now, weren't you?

"Y-you're the shut-in? No way! You've really dressed up, I almost didn't recognize you..."

"What? Don't laugh."

"I-I'm not laughing! It's just that you look so different from usual today, I was surprised..."

She stared at me intently for a long time, letting out various exclamations before finally nodding, as if she'd understood something.

"Komachi picked this out for you, didn't she?"

"Yeah, you know me so well."

"I knew it..."

She looked like she understood perfectly, but what exactly did she understand?

I felt like I was being inspected by Peeko, so I returned the favor in the style of Yoshiyuki Konishi (Note 37: Peeko's real name is Katsuaki Sugiura, a Japanese entertainer and fashion critic. Yoshiyuki Konishi is a male fashion designer.).

Yuihama was wearing a strapless tube top, with the plastic strap on the right side resting on her shoulder while the left one dangled freely. The heart-shaped necklace around her neck swayed slightly; she seemed quite fond of it. Over her upper body, she wore a denim short jacket, and for her lower half, she had on black hot pants made of work pants material, adorned with gold buttons. On her feet, she wore high-heeled sandals that seemed to wrap around her like vines, and her anklet jingled with every step.

"It doesn't really feel very adult..."

"Huh? What part isn't adult?"

Yuihama nervously looked at her hands and then her feet. Well, given this outfit, she at least looks like a college student...

Now that everyone had pretty much arrived, only one person was left. Just as I thought this, a voice called out from behind me.

"Sorry, am I late?"

In the dimness of the night, her white summer dress stood out, and the inner leggings on her lower half highlighted her slender, elegant legs. Her small sandals were simple in design but perfectly complemented her firm ankles.

When she raised her wrist to check the time, the pink face of her small watch looked incredibly cute against her fair skin. The metal band wrapped around her gleaming wrist, like a piece of silver craftsmanship.

"You're right on time."

Yukino was like a small white flower blooming in the night, exuding a cool charm.

"Ah..."

All I could manage was a single sound; I couldn't say anything else. The memory of being stunned by her beauty when I first stepped into the Service Club room resurfaced.

If only her personality were a little more normal...

"Have you ever heard of a 'wasteful ghost'?"

"How foolish. There's no such thing as a ghost in this world."

Yukino ignored my question and scanned everyone present.

"Hmm..."

Then, starting with Zaimokuza, she pointed at everyone in sequence.

"Fail."

"Huh?"

"Fail."

"...Eh?"

"Fail."

"Eh?"

"Your character is a fail."

"Hey..."

Everyone was inexplicably deemed a failure, and my evaluation was particularly different.

"Didn't I tell you all to dress more maturely?"

"Weren't you supposed to look like adults?"

"If you're not dressed formally enough for where we're going, you'll be turned away at the door. For guys, a collared shirt and a jacket are the absolute basics."

"Th-there are rules like that...?"

Yukino nodded at Totsuka.

"Higher-class restaurants or hotels often have such rules, so you'd best remember them quickly."

"You seem pretty knowledgeable about that sort of thing."

Normally, high school students wouldn't know these things. After all, the places we usually frequent are mostly limited to Bamiyan and Saizeriya; if we wanted something a bit more upscale, it would probably only go as far as Royal Host.