My Youth Romantic Comedy Is Wrong, As I Expected

This was truly miserable... Seeing the teacher looking so pitiful, I couldn't help wanting to say something to encourage her.

"Sensei, please rest assured, I won't become that kind of person! I'll do the housework properly and become a gigolo even greater than a gigolo!"

"What the hell is a Super Gigolo?!"

My dream for the future had been rejected, bringing me to a crossroads in life. At the critical moment when my dream was about to be destroyed, I tried to reason with her.

"Calling someone a gigolo does sound awful, but I think it wouldn't be so bad if we changed the name to house husband."

"Hmm?"

Hiratsuka-sensei glared at me, and her chair creaked. That meant, "Let's hear what you have to say."

"Modern society advocates gender equality. Naturally, women are becoming increasingly active in society, and Hiratsuka-sensei being a teacher is proof of that."

"...Yes, that's true."

It seemed my opening had succeeded, so I could continue.

"It goes without saying that as large numbers of women enter the workforce, men will face a situation where there are too many monks and too little porridge. After all, throughout history and across the world, job openings have never been unlimited."

"Mm..."

"For example, suppose a company had one hundred employees fifty years ago. The proportion of men would probably have been one hundred percent. But if the company then hired fifty female employees out of obligation, fifty men would naturally have to seek work elsewhere. Even with such simple calculations, that many men would lose their jobs. And if we also consider the economic downturn of recent years, the number of male employees would inevitably become even smaller."

When I got that far, Hiratsuka-sensei stroked her chin and fell into thought.

"Go on."

"Modern companies don't need as many employees as they used to. The spread of computers and the development of the internet have made them prioritize efficiency, while individual productivity has risen dramatically. As a result, society now has a situation where people say, 'You're working too hard.' Isn't that why concepts like job sharing exist?"

"That certainly does exist."

"Furthermore, household appliances have advanced considerably. Anyone can rely on them to handle housework, even boys."

"Hey, wait."

Just as I was speaking with great enthusiasm, Sensei suddenly interrupted me. After giving a light cough, she stared at my face and said:

"Well, those machines aren't that easy to use... Things don't always go so smoothly, you know."

"You're the only one who can't use them, Sensei."

"...What?"

Sensei spun her chair around and kicked me in the shin. That hurt like hell! And she glared at me fiercely, too. I hurriedly changed the subject and continued.

"A-Anyway! Everyone worked so hard to create a society where people wouldn't need to work, yet now they demand that others work or complain that there aren't enough jobs. Don't you think that's ridiculous?"

The perfect conclusion: Working means you lose! Working means you lose!

"Honestly... you're still the same hopeless case."

Sensei let out a huge sigh, but then she smiled as if she had remembered something.

"Maybe if you eat some food cooked by a girl, your way of thinking will change..."

She stood up and shoved me out of the office by the shoulders.

"W-Wait! What are you doing, Sensei? It hurts, it hurts!"

"You're going to the Service Club to learn the value of hard work."

My shoulder felt as though it had been clamped in a vise, and in the end, my entire body was shoved forcefully outside.

When I turned around to protest the way Sensei had treated me, she mercilessly slammed the door shut with a BANG. That meant, "I will not listen to any arguments, resistance, complaints, dissatisfaction, or backtalk."

Should I just leave?

The moment I thought that, a sharp pain shot through the shoulder Sensei had grabbed earlier. If I ran away, I'd probably get beaten up again... She was a terrifying teacher, making me develop a conditioned reflex in such a short time.

I had no choice but to show my face at that strange club I'd only recently joined, called the "Service Club" or something. It was supposedly a club, but I had absolutely no idea what its activities were. And for that matter, I understood its president even less.

What exactly was her deal?

Yukino was reading in the clubroom as usual.

After exchanging a simple greeting, I moved a chair to a spot somewhat farther away from Yukino and sat down, then took several books out of my bag. The Service Club had now completely become a reading club for boys and girls.

So what exactly was this club supposed to do? What happened to that competition we were supposed to have?

Suddenly, the answer to that question arrived together with a visitor's faint knock on the door.

"Come in."

Yukino stopped turning pages, carefully placed a bookmark in her book, then looked up and responded toward the door.

"E-Excuse me."

The visitor seemed nervous, and her voice was a little shrill.

A girl opened the door only a crack, then slipped through the narrow gap as though she didn't want anyone to see her coming in.

The girl had shoulder-length wavy brown hair that swayed with every step she took. Her gaze constantly darted around as though she were scouting the place, and the moment our eyes met, she let out a small scream.

...Was I some kind of strange creature?

"W-Why is there a shut-in here?!"

"...I'm a member of this club."

Was shut-in referring to me? And who was this girl?

Honestly, I had no memory of her whatsoever.

Still, she looked like a typical High School Girl of the current era—the common sort of girl who celebrated youth and looked bright and glamorous. She wore a short skirt, and three buttons on her long-sleeved shirt were undone, exposing a slight glimpse of cleavage adorned with a pendant bearing a heart-shaped accessory. Together with her bleached brown hair, her appearance flagrantly ignored school rules from every angle.

I had never interacted with girls like this. No, it would be more accurate to say that I had never interacted with any girls at all.

But she seemed to know me, so I didn't quite dare ask, "Excuse me, but who are you?"

Then I noticed that the ribbon on her chest was red. Our school uniforms had ribbons in three different colors to distinguish grades, and a red ribbon meant she was a second-year like me.

...No, I noticed the color of her ribbon not because I was looking at her chest, but because it happened to enter my field of vision! By the way, she was pretty well-endowed.

"Anyway, have a seat first."

I casually pulled out a chair and invited her to sit. I should emphasize that I wasn't deliberately acting like a gentleman to cover up my lewd thoughts; this was natural, unforced kindness from the bottom of my heart.

Ah, I really was the model of a gentleman. The fact that I often wore gentleman's clothes was the best proof.

"Th-Thank you..."

She hesitated, but still sat down as I had said. At that moment, Yukino, sitting across from her, met her eyes.

"You're Yuihama Yui, aren't you?"

"Y-You know me?"

The moment Yuihama Yui heard her name, she immediately brightened up. To her, being recognized by Yukino seemed to be some sort of status symbol.

"That's amazing... Don't tell me you've memorized every student's name in the school?"

"That's not the case. I don't know yours, for instance."

"I see..."

"You don't need to be discouraged. This is my fault. You were so insignificant that I failed to notice you, and my heart is too weak to ignore your existence."

"Hey, are you trying to comfort me? That is an awful way to comfort someone, isn't it? It somehow ended up sounding like I was the one at fault!"

"I wasn't comforting you. I was mocking you."

Without even looking at me, Yukino brushed aside the hair that had fallen over her shoulder.

"This club... seems pretty interesting."

Yuihama looked at Yukino and me with sparkling eyes... Did this girl have flowers blooming inside her head?

"It isn't particularly interesting... In fact, I'm rather displeased by your misunderstanding."

Yukino gave Yuihama an icy look. Seeing that, Yuihama hurriedly waved both hands in clarification.

"Ah, no, that's not what I meant! I just thought you two looked really comfortable together! And, um... the shut-in is completely different from how he is in class. So he can talk after all~"

"Come on, of course I can talk..."

Did I really look that bad at communicating...?

"Now that you mention it, that's true. Yuihama-san, you're in Class F too, right?"

"Huh? Really?"

"You didn't know?"

At Yukino's words, Yuihama's body stiffened.

Crap!

I understood better than anyone the pain of not being remembered even by classmates. To keep her from suffering the same blow, I decided to muddle through somehow.

"I-I knew that."

"...Then why did you look away?"

Yuihama glared at me.

"So you don't have any friends in class, do you, shut-in? You always look so sneaky, and you're gross-looking too."

Ah~~ I recognized that look of treating someone like an idiot. The girls in class did often look at me like I was something filthy. She must have been one of those girls who hung around with the Soccer Club all day.

So she was my enemy after all. And here I was, worrying about her feelings.

"...You slut."

I couldn't help muttering the curse under my breath, and Yuihama immediately protested angrily.

"What does 'slut' mean?! I'm obviously still a vir—u-ugh, ah! N-Nothing, nothing!" Yuihama's face flushed red as she frantically waved her hands, trying to take back the word that had nearly slipped out. It seemed she was just an idiot. Yukino appeared to want to help after seeing her panic so much, and said:

"There's nothing to be embarrassed about, is there? At this age, still being a vir—"

"Wah~~ Ah~~ What are you saying?! It's embarrassing to have no experience when you're already in your second year! Yukino, maybe you just aren't feminine enough?"

"...That way of thinking is truly beneath contempt."

Oh? For some reason, Yukino had become even colder.

"Still, saying things like 'feminine enough' only proves that you're a slut."

"You said it again! How can you call someone a slut?! You really are so vulgar, shut-in!"

Yuihama let out an angry whimper and looked at me with tears in her eyes.

"Calling you a slut has nothing to do with whether I'm vulgar. Also, don't call me shut-in."

She made it sound like I was some guy who never left his house... Ah, so that was an insult? This was probably some awful nickname my classmates had given me.

...That was so cruel, I was almost crying.

It was wrong to talk badly about someone behind their back.

So I would say it right in front of them. Only by making them hear it with their own ears could I cause damage!

"You slut."

"You... You... You're the worst! You're disgusting to the extreme! Go die!"

Those words even made me, normally mild, courteous, and accommodating as a safety razor, fall silent. There were many things one should never say in this world, especially words concerning human life, which had an especially strong impact. Unless you were prepared to bear responsibility for another person's life, you shouldn't say such things lightly.

To correct Yuihama, I was silent for a while before speaking solemnly with anger.

"Don't casually tell people to 'go die' or say things like 'I'll kill you.' Watch out, or I'll slaughter you."

"Ah... R-Right, sorry, I didn't mean it like that... Huh? You said it too! Aren't you exactly the same?!"

Yuihama looked incredibly foolish when she realized she was at a disadvantage. Still, unexpectedly, she was willing to lower her head and apologize. My impression of Yuihama began to change somewhat. I had assumed that the people always around her—the Soccer Club members and her other companions—were all like that, with nothing in their heads but having fun, sex, and drugs. Was this a Ryu Murakami novel?

Yuihama seemed tired of arguing, so she let out a soft sigh.

"Um... Hiratsuka-sensei told me this place could help students make their wishes come true."

"Is that so?"

I had thought this was just a club where we killed time reading books all day.

Yukino completely ignored my question and answered Yuihama directly.