Idiot

After thanking the streamer, Zhao Yu sang the Japan version of "Fairy Tale Town" as well. This time, Yuuka finally understood it.

"It's so lovely. It reminded me of my childhood. Grandpa loved telling me fairy tales." Yuuka's voice was somewhat subdued. Zhao Yu's song had made her homesick.

"What was Yuuka like as a child?" Zhao Yu asked.

"I'm not actually from Tokyo. My hometown is in Kansai, and back then, I was always with my grandpa and grandma..." Yuuka began softly recounting stories from her childhood.

"Later, so that I could have better opportunities, my parents had me transfer schools to Tokyo. But I didn't like this city at all. Everyone always seemed to be rushing to do something, never stopping for even a moment."

"I'm too stupid. Just keeping up with everyone is already exhausting for me. Sometimes I wonder... if I hadn't come to Tokyo, would things have been much easier?"

"But running away like this is wrong. I can't just give up..."

Just as he thought, Yuuka really did have many stories. Zhao Yu let out a soft sigh.

A girl had come with her parents to a big city where she knew no one. Everything here was utterly unfamiliar to her.

She clumsily yet earnestly tried to fit in, only to discover that no matter how hard she chased after them, she could only barely keep pace with everyone else.

"It's lonely, isn't it, Yuuka?" Zhao Yu asked quietly.

Yuuka did not answer him. She had calmed down a little now. If she admitted it just like that, the emotional walls she had worked so hard to build would completely collapse.

A large part of why she got along so well with Zhao Yu was because he was Chinese. Other than online, they would never cross paths in real life.

That was why Yuuka could tell him without hesitation what was troubling her, and could be friends with him without any burden.

But she absolutely did not want to show Zhao Yu her vulnerability.

Even if she was a silly, airheaded girl, Yuuka still had the pride of not wanting anyone to pity her.

"I can tell how hard Yuuka works. Even while being a video creator and doing part-time gaming companionship, you've never fallen behind in your studies. Yuuka, you're amazing..." Zhao Yu continued.

"But this much effort isn't enough..." Yuuka interrupted him.

"I have to... I have to work even harder..."

Her parents' faces surfaced in her mind. Their expectant gazes were something Yuuka still could not forget.

"Yuuka, you're a child of the Ueno family. You must be better than everyone else!"

"We put in a great deal of effort to get you into Ochanomizu."

"Don't disappoint your father and mother's expectations..."

That was right. No one had ever asked what Yuuka wanted. Her father had sent her away from home without telling her grandparents.

Yuuka had come alone to unfamiliar Tokyo. Whether she was mocked for her strange accent or excluded because she was not from Tokyo, Yuuka could only endure it all by herself.

But she had not given up. If her accent was wrong, she practiced it diligently. If people excluded her, she looked for chances to fit in with them. In short... she could not let her parents' sacrifices go to waste.

Over time, Yuuka had forgotten when her father had last praised her. All she knew was that she could not bring shame upon her family.

"If working hard isn't enough, then I'll just work twice as hard..." Yuuka murmured.

Fairy Tale Town was wonderful, but people always grew up. The more Yuuka grew up, the more she wanted.

She wanted to rise above the rest. She wanted freedom. She wanted to live up to her parents' expectations. But all of that was simply far too distant from her.

"Yuuka..." Zhao Yu suddenly spoke.

"You can't keep doubling your efforts."

"Huh?" Yuuka made a puzzled sound.

"You're just an ordinary person. You need to learn how to balance work and rest. If you stay taut like a bowstring, one day, you'll break," Zhao Yu said.

"No, you don't understand... I..."

"No, I'm not telling you to give up. Not working hard doesn't mean giving up. When you're tired, you should rest. As long as you pull yourself together and stand back up again, that's enough."

Although Zhao Yu did not know why Yuuka was pushing herself so hard, he was certain that she was not doing it purely for herself.

Only someone carrying the expectations of others would suppress her own nature and choose to numb herself with hard work.

"If you keep pushing yourself like this, in the end, you'll only end up with nothing. People aren't machines. You need to know how to cherish yourself and think about yourself."

This was the first time anyone had ever said something like that to Yuuka. For a moment, she did not know how to respond to Zhao Yu.

"Sorry, Lord Yu... I'm a little tired today. Let's play together again next time." Yuuka forced herself to speak, then hung up.

[What's wrong with Yuuka?]

[It feels like something she's been suppressing for a long time suddenly burst out.]

[Everyone has their own difficulties...]

"Everyone, that's it for today's stream. I'm ending it too..." Zhao Yu was in no mood to continue streaming. After hurriedly saying a few words to his viewers, he shut down the stream at lightning speed.

In her apartment, Yuuka lay on her bed, staring blankly at the ceiling.

"I think I messed up..."

She had rudely interrupted Lord Yu like that. Would he be angry with her?

"Forget it. I'm just an idiot anyway. I can't do anything right..." Yuuka sighed.

The soft mattress was like a swamp, and Yuuka felt herself sinking deeper and deeper into it.

Bzz, bzz, bzz... A phone vibrated.

Yuuka picked up her phone and glanced at it. It was a message from Zhao Yu.

"What are you doing?"

"Getting ready to sleep. Lord Yu, let me have some peace and quiet."

"I'll only say one last thing."

"What?"

"Excessive expectations and effort are, in themselves, a form of self-abuse. You need to learn to accept your own imperfections."

"I understand. Then, that's it..."

Ring, ring! The phone rang, and Yuuka could only answer it.

"What else do you want to say, Lord Yu?"

"Nothing much. Let me tell you a story..." Zhao Yu said softly from the other end of the line as he stood on the balcony, looking down at the street below.

"Go ahead..."

"Once, there was a man. Like you, he believed he carried certain expectations on his shoulders. He always wanted to fulfill them, but in the end, he still became an ordinary corporate drone." Zhao Yu recalled the distant past.

"He had wondered too—was someone like him really worthy of other people's expectations? Later, he realized that everyone was actually like that. Ordinary people were the majority in this society."

"So what are you trying to say?" Yuuka asked.

"What I'm saying is, if those expectations aren't something you're good at, or if they make you suffer, how can you possibly fulfill them? Your life shouldn't be planned out by other people..." Zhao Yu said.

"No one can control you. Most of the time, expectations are something you force upon yourself. Don't let certain expectations make you overlook the love of other people..."

"But... does anyone really care about me?" Yuuka was somewhat lost.

Her parents never stopped talking about the family's honor. Many of her friends in Tokyo were only passing acquaintances. No one in this world cared whether she was tired, and no one loved her.

"Have you forgotten? Your grandfather, who often told you fairy tales—at least he wouldn't be happy to see you like this, would he?" Zhao Yu reminded her.

If it were Grandpa and Grandma, would they worry about her pushing herself too hard?

The kind faces of her grandfather and grandmother surfaced in her mind, and Yuuka could not help thinking that.

The answer was naturally yes. After all, if that were not the case, her father would not have secretly sent her to Tokyo without telling them.

A faint light gradually appeared in Yuuka's eyes. At the very least... at the very least, she could not make Grandpa and Grandma worry.

"And aren't we friends? I'd be worried about your mental state too," Zhao Yu said.

After spending the past two days with her, he had more or less figured out Yuuka's personality. She was a very innocent girl with convictions of her own.

He did not want to see her keep exhausting herself like this.

"Honestly, I don't know what to do with you. Fine... I'll get some proper rest lately..." Yuuka's heart suddenly felt warm.

So this was what it felt like to have someone care about her? Somehow, she felt a little happy...

"Come to think of it, Lord Yu, aren't you acting a little too concerned about me?"

"Huh? Not at all. I just don't want you to work yourself into the ground."

"I see~" Yuuka teased.

"What about you? You cared so much when I went to play games with someone else," Zhao Yu retorted.

"Idiot." *2

They said it at the exact same time, then burst into laughter together.

"Thank you, Lord Yu. I'll adjust myself properly," Yuuka said after laughing for a while.

"That's good. Good night..." Zhao Yu hung up.

Yuuka, meanwhile, went over to her computer desk and pulled up the recording from the livestream. Listening to Zhao Yu's singing, she smiled faintly.