This Chat Group's Vibe is a Bit Off
Chapter 14

Kiana, Become Schicksal's Overseer / Team Member Tomori, No One Can Match Her Participation Rate

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26d ago•

"It's a little difficult to max out the download speed without subscribing, but cracking the subscription system is pretty easy. I can get you a hundred-year subscription first," Ksitigarbha said.

"Ling, do you think your brother can't afford a subscription?" Qianyi said. "I was just curious whether renewing it could break the download speed limit. Come on, it's time to give you some maintenance."

He drew Ksitigarbha, fetched a wool cloth, wiped away the marks left on the blade from battle, then began gently applying sword oil to every inch of Ksitigarbha's surface, carefully wiping it down to ensure every spot was evenly covered.

Feeling the sensations transmitted through Ksitigarbha, Ling couldn't help but give off a subtle tremble, and even her voice turned soft and syrupy. "Mmm~, that feels so good. Please take care of the hilt too."

How could she describe this feeling? It was like bathing with her sister in the past, when her sister used those cool hands mixed with cherry blossom body wash to scrub and massage her back. A tingling, numbing pleasure spread through her, all her worries and exhaustion gradually melting away beneath that warm touch, leaving behind only pure delight and satisfaction.

Following Higokumaru's request, Qianyi began focusing on maintaining the hilt. While he was at it, he checked the shop for anything useful.

His physical strength was far too weak. Without Stigmata support, just exchanging blows with Durandal had broken his arm. He needed to get stronger, though considering it had been Durandal, he felt better about it.

Even if he got stronger, he couldn't possibly become Durandal's opponent in the short term. What he needed should be sealing-type skills. If he had something like that, dealing with Durandal would be much easier.

He opened the chat group shop and discovered that it even had intelligent search. So he entered keywords such as "seal," "skill," and "Persona."

System searching! Search complete!

Skill: Great Seal

Skill Description: Unleash the power of one's inner universe. Can even seal Nyx, the mother star of death. (Compatible with the Persona system.)

Price: 1000 points

A thousand points for a skill capable of sealing even gods was undoubtedly an incredible bargain. He could buy it without thinking, yet Qianyi's eyes filled with terror in an instant.

Because he had heard of this skill. The last person to use it had been a senior named Yuuki Ryou, and the result of that person's final use of the skill had been his body gradually dissolving into butterflies while his soul hung on the moon forever.

In other words, he had died completely. Revival was basically impossible.

But after looking through the other items, he found none worth buying. They were either outrageously expensive or complete garbage even after purchase. Then, he suddenly noticed a very conspicuous star icon in the shop. The moment he clicked it, an exceptionally luxurious page popped up.

Dimensional Leap

By injecting points, you can draw skills, items, and abilities from various dimensions.

Current Rate-Up: Heracles (Click for details)

"There are even details?"

Qianyi clicked on them, and immediately lost it.

A single draw cost 300 points. Ten draws cost 3,000 points. (One additional draw included.)

The Rate-Up pool guarantee was 350. The next Rate-Up pool would not inherit this pool's pity count.

Rate-Up Details: ① Heracles' martial arts, ② Heracles' achievements, ③ Heracles' weapons...

Brother B!

How had he fallen so low?!

In the Type-Moon World, he had been reduced to a powerless ocean dweller. Everything on his body had practically been dismantled and taken away. He had become a scattered Grand Servant. How was it that even in the Dimensional Chat Group, they still couldn't put together a complete Heracles?

But then Qianyi thought of a certain intense and thrilling command-card gacha battle game that still didn't have auto-battle in 2025. It took five copies of the same character to max out their Noble Phantasm, yet unlocking extra skills and reaching level 120 required at least six copies. With that, he smiled in understanding.

Kids, FGO does it too!

Still, if he could pull Heracles' Body, the boost to himself would be immense.

Don't underestimate Heracles just because he was a powerless ocean dweller in the Type-Moon World!

"My turn! Pull!"

First pull: Pure Origin Stone ×1

Second pull: Elixir of Love ×1

Third pull!

With a light tap of his finger, the magic circle at the center of the screen slowly rotated. The white orb abruptly burst into golden light, the background music suddenly surged and quickened, flashing beams converged into a pillar of light, and a golden card appeared within it, revealing its true form.

Hundred Head Slayer (Nine Lives)

Holy shit! I got it!

Although it wasn't Heracles' Body, which he wanted most, Hundred Head Slayer (Nine Lives), the representative of Heracles' martial arts, was absolutely one of the best things he could get.

You can steal my weapons, armor, and achievements, but can you steal the skills I forged through countless trials?

Steel Prison Big: Brothers, I pulled this from the gacha. Is it any good?

Steel Prison Big: Pull result.jpg

Lower District Flying Head Barbarian: ?

Talulah: No, bro.

Customer Service Xiangzi is at your service: You went and pulled the gacha pool? That thing is a complete scam. Stay away from it. Reject gambling addicts. Starting with me... Wait, how did you get a pull?!

Child of Prophecy: I'm so jealous. If only I had luck that good.

Steel Prison Big: It's nothing special. By the way, where's Kiana? Isn't she supposed to be lucky? She can give it a try. Maybe she'll get something.

I want to eat Mei-flavored instant noodles: Damn it, why didn't anyone warn me? You guys can all retreat, but I can't! Durandal is hanging me up and whipping me!

I want to eat Mei-flavored instant noodles: I've learned my lesson, please spare me.jpg

Kiana was currently being hung up and whipped by Durandal.

The instant she realized something was wrong, she had planned to open a Space Gate and run, but Durandal grabbed her and refined it in an instant.

Black Abyss White Flower was gone. That was a huge matter for Durandal. To obtain this Divine Key, she had no idea how much effort she had put in before House of Sanyate allowed her to use it. Yet after going out on one mission, Black Abyss White Flower was gone. How was she supposed to explain this to House of Sanyate, and to Cecilia, the Valkyrie she admired most?

I might be the most useless, most worthless, most unreliable Valkyrie in the world.

Thinking this, Durandal hung Kiana up and whipped her while demanding the whereabouts of Black Abyss White Flower.

Seeing that torture was imminent, Kiana begged repeatedly. "Sis! You really are my sister! Born from the same roots, why must we torment each other so?"

"Return Black Abyss White Flower to me, and everything can be discussed," Durandal stated clearly.

"No way." Kiana thought she had worked so hard to get it. Why should she return it just because Durandal told her to? She should at least get some interest, right?

Then Durandal whipped her for a full hour. It wasn't that Kiana was stubborn and refusing to talk. She had already passed out from the first punch, slept for a full hour, and then been beaten awake.

I want to eat Mei-flavored instant noodles: I've learned my lesson, please spare me.jpg

I want to eat Mei-flavored instant noodles: Shoko, can you return Black Abyss White Flower to me? (Black and blue all over)

Customer Service Xiangzi is at your service: This isn't my personal spoils. This is everyone's shared glory.

Talulah: What happened?

I want to eat Mei-flavored instant noodles: My sister caught me. She's hanging me up and whipping me like crazy, telling me to return Black Abyss White Flower or give her your coordinates.

Talulah: Where is Miss Raiden Mei?

I want to eat Mei-flavored instant noodles: She's standing to the side watching me get whipped, because my sister thinks your disappearance must have been caused by me, the Herrscher of the Void. (Crying cat face)

Lower District Flying Head Barbarian: I can't handle this.

Steel Prison Big: I can't handle this.

Maple Sugar Commander: I can't handle this.

Customer Service Xiangzi is at your service: So does that mean we have to give it back?

Steel Prison Big: If we surrender, can we return only half of it?

If surrendering meant they could return only half, they could give back Black Abyss while keeping Abyss Flower.

After all, Black Abyss White Flower's strongest point was not its combat ability, but its power of creation. Its Zeroth Rated Power could even repair living beings from the genetic level onward, allowing those at death's door to regain new life.

In the visual novel "Anti-Entropy," Schrödinger used this Divine Key at the cost of quantumizing herself, curing Einstein, Tesla, and Welt of the decay effect inflicted by Black Abyss. She broke Einstein and Tesla's lifespan limits so that they would never age, and allowed Welt to grasp the mysteries of creation.

I want to eat Mei-flavored instant noodles: You can surrender and only give back half?

Steel Prison Big: There's a rule where I'm from called "lose half when you surrender." Ask her whether you can give her Black Abyss first, get her to release you, then decide afterward whether to give her Abyss Flower.

I want to eat Mei-flavored instant noodles: Alright, I'll ask.

Two minutes later,

I want to eat Mei-flavored instant noodles: My sister said yes, but we have to go back to Heavenly Mandate with her and become Valkyries.

Customer Service Xiangzi is at your service: How can that work? Haven't we been working this hard precisely to keep you and Raiden Mei from falling into Heavenly Mandate's hands?

Steel Prison Big: No, Shoko. Consciousness changes along with changes in the objective world. Heavenly Mandate is not a monolith either. As the child of Siegfried and Cecilia, Kiana possesses inheritance rights to both Kaslana and Sanyate. In other words, among Heavenly Mandate's Three Great Families, she can inherit two of them. As for the head of the remaining House of Apocalypse, she is Kiana's aunt.

Steel Prison Big: Ever since the Second Eruption, Theresa and Otto have only kept up appearances. If Theresa learns that you, Kiana, her niece, are still alive, she will definitely do everything in her power to prevent you from falling into Otto's hands. Raiden Mei can contact Anti-Entropy. Then we can begin preparing for rebellion. Heavenly Mandate is dead. Let the yellow heavens rise!

Steel Prison Big: Kiana, for a better future, become the Overseer of Heavenly Mandate.

I want to eat Mei-flavored instant noodles: Huh? Me, the Overseer of Heavenly Mandate?

What virtue or ability do I have to become the Overseer of Heavenly Mandate?

Steel Prison Big: Otto can do it, but you can't?

I want to eat Mei-flavored instant noodles: I can't handle that much official business!

Steel Prison Big: That's easy. When the time comes, you can be the Overseer in name, while I'll be the Overseer with actual power. Once we unify Heavenly Mandate, defeat the Honkai, and occupy Earth, I'll immediately launch the Great Expedition and levy Band Dissolution Tax across the entire world, the universe, and the multiverse!

At this stage, Qianyi's goal was to study hard, get into the University of Tokyo, enter politics, then run for Prime Minister of Japan, impose the Band Dissolution Tax, and form a band of his own.

He would play bass into the Budokan and blow up Tokyo Tower for the party to hear.

Of course, he wasn't some rigid person. If there was a faster way to accomplish his goals, why wouldn't he do it?

Customer Service Xiangzi is at your service: Band Dissolution Tax?

Steel Prison Big: Anywhere in the world, any act of arbitrarily doing whatever one pleases and attempting to disband a band without the consent of every band member, relying solely on one person's will, will receive a tax penalty starting at over one million.

Talulah: Taxes in other worlds have reached this extent already?

Lower District Flying Head Barbarian: Agricultural taxes, commercial taxes, heating taxes, mining taxes, and all kinds of other taxes weren't enough for you, so now you can even come up with such blatant robbery as Band Dissolution Tax?

Maple Sugar Commander: Hard to imagine the boss's family was actually this kind of force.

Customer Service Xiangzi is at your service: No, I think this guy was simply having fun playing in a band, only to discover that someone had disbanded his own band. He holds a grudge, so he wants to do this.

Customer Service Xiangzi is at your service: Qianyi, why is a man like you so narrow-minded?

Cold sweat broke out on Shoko's forehead. Fortunately, Qianyi wasn't in the same world as her. Otherwise, before she could even disband CRYCHIC, she would probably face an astronomical tax fine, making her already poor family even worse off.

I want to eat Mei-flavored instant noodles: Is this really the time to talk about that?! My sister is still hanging me up and whipping me!

Steel Prison Big: Calm down. I know you're in a hurry, but don't rush. If rushing helped, I would have rushed already.

Customer Service Xiangzi is at your service: Black Abyss White Flower is with me. Do you need Gene Reaper too?

I want to eat Mei-flavored instant noodles: I don't know. Return Black Abyss to my sister first, so she stops whipping me. As for the other half, I'll decide whether to return it after seeing if she keeps whipping me.

Lower District Flying Head Barbarian: If she doesn't whip you, you'll return it to her?

I want to eat Mei-flavored instant noodles: How could that work?! If she stops whipping me and I still return it, wouldn't that mean I got beaten for nothing?!

Steel Prison Big: ...Kid, you're invincible.

So you really can't be soft-hearted with her.

You have to whip her twice before she'll cooperate.

After resolving Kiana's problem, Qianyi put away Ksitigarbha, took off his shoes, and turned to walk down the long corridor. The floor was laid with cherry wood planks, spotless from years of cleaning.

He pushed open the door to his room. A kotatsu table stood in the middle, bedding lay on the right, and a desk was ahead. The room was spacious and sparsely decorated, with only three portraits hanging on the walls: Amaterasu, Tsukuyomi, and Susanoo, figures from Japanese mythology.

Amaterasu stood amid countless rays of sunlight, holding the Yasaka Magatama. Tsukuyomi stood beneath a pitch-black crescent moon, holding the Yata Mirror. Susanoo held the ultimate divine sword of Japanese mythology, Ame no Murakumo no Tsurugi. Beneath Susanoo's portrait stood a rack for storing swords, and Qianyi placed Ksitigarbha upon it. Looking around the empty room, he decided to buy some things tomorrow to fill it out.

But before buying anything, he needed to hire an auntie to clean the house first.

Qianyi lay on the bed, planning what he needed to do tomorrow. Then a crisp, pleasant ringtone that sounded particularly hateful to him rang out.

He took out his phone. It wasn't a message from anyone he knew, so it was obviously someone from the chat group. When he opened it, he immediately lost it.

Talulah: You there?

Toyokawa Shoko, your party participation rate is unmatched.

Starting with "you there?" always means you're about to look like a clown.

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