It was not until I woke up in the morning that I realized it had been a dream. Thinking it over carefully, it should have been my Primordial Spirit that drove the ghost away in the dream.
Normally, when I slept, I could sense the things around me and wake up at any time. Those were all real circumstances, not dreams.
I figured that because I had possessed this ability before, I sensed other things even in the dream and woke up within it.
There was another time when I knew I was dreaming. How did I know?
Because when I was in my teens, after an accident, I had lucid dreams every day. I knew I was dreaming, then played around in my dreams, flew through them, and could change my form however I pleased.
But later I got addicted. During the day, I wanted to sleep and go play in my dreams too. I was only awake three or four hours a day, so I got a little scared. Every time I entered a dream, I would wake myself up and go back to sleep. Gradually, I lost that ability, and only had one or two lucid dreams now and then.
This time, I knew I was dreaming. Then, in the dream, I discovered a ghost that looked like Chen Haonan causing trouble at my doorstep, constantly rattling my door for fun.
He was rattling the door on the first floor, so I kicked it open and started cursing at him. "Fuck your mother! Are you out of your mind? You even dare come into my dreams?"
"Sword, come!"
I had wanted to imitate those novels, summon the treasured sword upstairs, and beat the shit out of him. But after shouting twice, nothing happened. Fuck! I remembered it working when I practiced in dreams before. No idea why it had failed now.
So I asked my girlfriend to help me get it.
Who would have thought Chen Haonan had no martial virtue at all?
I had been careless. I had not dodged. Give me a smile.
He suddenly attacked me from behind! A sneak attack! Smack! A right roundhouse kick. Smack! A left front kick. Smack! A five-whip combo. I stopped at the point of contact and did not hit him.
Catch! Deflect! Release!
Later, we leaped onto the roof of the second floor and fought tooth and nail.
Just then, my girlfriend came out and tossed me the sword. I raised it and slashed.
The moment Chen Haonan saw the sword in my hand, I became extraordinarily fierce, as if I had turned into a different person in an instant.
If the unarmed me had seemed like an expert to him, then the sword-wielding me was an expert among experts—an expert's expert.
After more than a dozen exchanges, Chen Haonan had been hacked into having no power to fight back. Even several strands of his handsome, androgynous long hair had been cut off by yours truly.
The moment he saw things were going south, he did not continue the fight. He turned around, jumped off the roof, and ran.
Fuck, let me tell you something. Was my place of Cultivating Buddhism and understanding the Dao somewhere he could come and go as he pleased?
If I did not make him recognize who I was today, then every stray cat and mongrel would come swaggering around here in the future. How fucking annoying would that be?
"Little thief! Do not run! This old man will battle you for three hundred rounds!"
I chased that motherfucker for more than two li.
And I had to admit, this guy's combat ability was not much to speak of, but his running speed really was no joke.
I chased after him howling, yet I still could not catch him.
Fine, no more chasing. If I kept after him, he would delay my proper rest. I still had work tomorrow morning.
Even though it was a dream, if I messed around in one for too long, I would still be tired as hell when I woke up!
Many times, when I had not realized I was dreaming, I would wake up absolutely exhausted afterward.
"Fuck your mother! If you dare come to my home again, I'll break your legs!"
I cursed desperately from behind him. I did not know whether that bastard could hear me.
Either way, I did not want to chase him anymore.
I felt as if there was a bladderful of piss inside me, with a slight swelling sensation in my lower abdomen, so I woke myself up.
And sure enough, that guy really never came again after that.
This was not some story I was telling, okay? It really, truly happened. It was pretty interesting.
Life went on as usual. Half a year later, my cultivation had improved noticeably.
One day, while I was asleep, my Primordial Spirit went to a nearby factory to exterminate ghosts.
I knew that factory very well. It was where I worked every day, mainly producing automotive electronic parts of all shapes and sizes.
The only thing that felt different was that the factory had four floors, and at every elevator entrance stood a statue of Guanyin Bodhisattva. Judging by the incense offerings, it seemed that someone came to burn incense every day.
Even during the day, I had felt that something was off. No matter how devout a Buddhist the boss was, surely he would not place one statue on every floor, right?
And there it was. After my Primordial Spirit arrived at the factory, I found many black, clumped-up things drifting around inside. My Primordial Spirit called them wandering souls and wild ghosts.
I had seen humanoid ghosts before, but it was my first time seeing these black clumps of ghosts that looked like smoke and mist.
As the saying went, since ancient times, righteousness and evil could never stand together. If it did not enter hell, then who would?
Without another word, I grabbed one in my left hand and stomped one under my right foot. As usual, I shouted "Sword, come!" several times. Damn it, the sword still did not fly over.
I casually pulled a short sword from my sleeve. "Pshk! Pshk!" One ghost per strike.
Just as I was killing to my heart's content, an old man in black robes suddenly appeared. He reached out to block my sword stroke and said, "Fellow Daoist, please show mercy."
I raised an eyebrow and replied in a questioning tone, "Show mercy? Mercy my ass! Since ancient times, righteousness and evil have never stood together. For cultivators like us, to exterminate demons and protect the Dao is our sacred duty. Get out of my way!"
"Fellow Daoist, fellow Daoist, please show mercy for this old man's sake. These spirits are innocent too. They are all people who died unjustly in accidents. They do not want to drift about like this either. I hope Fellow Daoist can open a net on one side and leave them a sliver of life. Consider it... consider it a favor this old man owes you, all right?"
Normally, I definitely was not such an unreasonable person, and the old man was not without reason. Whether these wronged souls lingered was not something they could decide themselves; special circumstances had caused it.
But looking at the countless black clumps drifting everywhere inside and outside the building, I knew I could not spare them. Even if they did not want to, because the living and the dead walked different paths, yin souls would still passively affect living people's bodies. If something happened, it would be too late.
So I gave the old man no face at all.
"Why the fuck are you wasting words? Get out of my way. If I leave them alone today and they cause a huge disaster someday, when those above hold someone accountable, who will take the blame? You?"
The old man gritted his teeth, seeming as if he had made an enormous decision.
"If anything happens, I'll take responsibility!"
Seeing him insist like that, I wanted to give him some face too. But I knew full well how serious the consequences of this sort of thing could be, so I remained forceful.
"You'll take responsibility? What the hell can you take responsibility for? Get the fuck out of the way!"
After shoving the old man aside, I prepared to continue.
Who would have known that this old man was no ordinary person either? He immediately attacked and started fighting me.
I thought to myself, I'm a peerless sword immortal, a proud genius of my generation who cultivated and attained enlightenment on my own. How could I lose to some old man?
Guess what happened? Fuck, I really could not beat him. We had only exchanged a dozen or so moves, yet I already felt I was no match for him. Maybe it was an illusion, but I always felt that the old man had not truly used his full strength and was merely circling around me. I had only understood the Dao not long ago, and my strength was nowhere near as high as it was in immortal cultivation novels. I truly could neither beat him nor do anything about it.
In the end, I had no choice but to compromise, though I still had to put on a front.
"Hmph! Old man, I'm only giving you face today! If an ordinary person dared block me like this, I would have broken his legs long ago."
The old man seemed to know I was putting on an act. He could not be bothered to respond, merely smiling and cupping his hands toward me.
That meant he was thanking me.
Only a month after this incident, just as expected, someone really died at the factory.