Ted's apartment.
"Impossible!"
Lily refused to believe the victims' families would do something like that. Gritting her teeth, she said, "You're a liar too, just like him!"
"Come on!"
Barney spread his hands. "Lily, public opinion has shifted lately. Who would dare pretend to be a victim's family member? Aren't they afraid they'll become a victim themselves?"
"And you aren't?"
Lily sneered.
"I'm different."
Barney held the T-shirt up against himself, pinned the badge to his chest, and straightened up. "I'm just grieving. I never said I was a victim's family member. I could simply be someone who bought memorial merchandise made by the victims' families. A bleeding-heart liberal passerby grieving over their grief. Though they might not grieve forever, I'm too emotional. I might never recover for the rest of my life! Whenever I think of it, my sorrow flows backward into a river..."
"And every time, it takes a hot chick to soothe that sorrow, right?"
Ted was speechless.
"As expected of my wingman. That's the heart of it."
Barney's expression instantly shifted from sorrow to smugness as he tossed the T-shirt back to Ted. "Trust me, this move is a classic. Ted, how long has it been since you got any? A few months? Half a year? A year? Doesn't matter. They all count as forever! Ted, you need to get back on the battlefield. And as your best friend, I'm giving you, a man who's practically forgotten how to make a move, the war god's guide. Guess how many times this guide has been tested in real combat?"
As he said this, his gaze swept across Marshall, Lily, and Ted one by one. Seeing that none of them spoke, he answered himself, "Two hundred and thirty-three times! I'm freaking amazing!"
"Two hundred and thirty-three times?"
Ted