Konan: Too Perverted!

"Tch, if you won't let me know, then I don't want to know either!"

"With time to waste like this, I might as well pray to Lord Jashin again."

Still cursing under his breath, Hidan eventually walked out of the cave.

Once outside, Hidan found a comfortable spot, clutched the Jashin Pendant, and began his routine prayer.

Inside the cave.

Kakuzu, who had seen Hidan out, returned.

"He's praying right now. He definitely won't come over to eavesdrop, so you can speak now."

Kakuzu kept his eyes fixed on Shirozumi.

There seemed to be an invisible pressure in his gaze.

If anything went wrong later, Kakuzu would immediately begin to doubt whether Shirozumi's earlier "empty promises" had also been a problem.

"No problem."

"Before I begin, I need to confirm something. Everyone knows about Hidan's ability, right?"

Shirozumi carried over a wooden frame and set it up somewhere elevated.

Pain silently stepped aside, yielding the central position.

"I know."

Kakuzu answered flatly.

"What a stupid question. Of course we know. That guy has no intention of hiding anything—he's arrogant as hell! Doesn't he know that intelligence is the most important thing for a shinobi?"

Deidara complained with a look of disdain.

"You're not much better."

Sasori's hoarse voice came from within Hiruko.

In short, after going around the circle, everyone knew about Hidan's ability.

They even knew Hidan's personality and weaknesses.

For example, Hidan was praying outside right now, and everyone knew that this guy would never disrespect his "Lord Jashin" by coming over to eavesdrop.

As for how Shirozumi, a newcomer who had suddenly appeared, knew about Hidan's ability, the Akatsuki Organization members assumed that Leader Pain had told this "prospective Strategist" the relevant intelligence.

So they did not find it strange.

"Hidan's Death Possession Blood is extremely powerful. As long as he obtains an enemy's blood, he can transfer any injury he suffers onto that enemy.

"And since he won't die even from fatal wounds, the key to his ability lies in one thing—how to obtain the enemy's blood."

Shirozumi took out a stack of papers he had prepared and began pinning them onto the wooden frame one by one.

A low-budget PPT.

"My initial idea was to find a way to acquire the Aburame Clan's insect secret technique from Konoha and have Hidan contract a mosquito Summoning Beast..."

"My god, that's so perverted?"

The moment Shirozumi described his discarded plan, Deidara, who was currently swatting mosquitoes away inside the cave, was stunned.

"The problem with this plan is that if the Aburame Clan's secret technique were stolen, Konoha would definitely become alert and take special precautions against related insects.

"Even Aburame Clan insects have extremely poor concealment against sensory shinobi.

"If there were too few mosquitoes, the blood they sucked wouldn't be enough for Hidan to use his ability even once.

"If there were too many, they would be easily exposed.

"And considering Hidan's devout faith in Jashin, whether he would even be willing to contract a Summoning Beast was another question.

"So I quickly rejected this plan."

"After that, there were several other ideas, such as disguising ourselves as a neutral medical organization and promoting free blood donations. I rejected those one by one as well."

As Shirozumi spoke above them, even though he had gone on for quite a while without reaching the main point, the Akatsuki Organization members listened with great interest, not growing impatient in the slightest.

Perhaps it was because of the "PPT," or perhaps because Shirozumi's ideas were novel and his logic meticulous.

"In the end, I settled on a perfect plan. Its only flaw is that Hidan cannot be allowed to know about it."

"Zetsu."

Shirozumi suddenly pointed at the "pitcher plant" below.

"Hm?"

Black White Zetsu looked puzzled.

"Zetsu is responsible for gathering intelligence in our organization, and he's also the best at infiltration and concealment, right?

"Zetsu, can you infiltrate the Five Great Shinobi Villages?"

Shirozumi knew full well how terrifying White Zetsu's infiltration and disguise abilities were. The others in the Akatsuki Organization, however, did not know just how capable Zetsu was in that regard.

Shirozumi had asked Zetsu the question mainly so the others would understand.

"Sure, no problem. So what am I infiltrating the Five Great Shinobi Villages for?"

White Zetsu answered Shirozumi.

Even though all Five Great Shinobi Villages had Perception Barriers, White Zetsu could slip in while the barriers were being rotated or repaired.

Even if there were no rotations or repairs, White Zetsu could approach a Konoha Ninja who had gone out, copy his Chakra, disguise himself as a Konoha Ninja, and safely pass through the barrier.

In the original story, during the Fourth Shinobi World War, White Zetsu's disguise ability would have made it nearly impossible to distinguish friend from foe if Naruto Uzumaki had not gained the ability to sense malice.

"Just do one thing: go to the public restrooms in the Five Great Shinobi Villages, as well as the toilets in important ninjas' homes, and collect a few things..."

"Huh? Toilets? You're not asking me to collect shit, are you?"

White Zetsu looked somewhat delighted, even a little shy.

"Uh, no."

Shirozumi's mouth twitched.

Why the hell are you blushing?

"As everyone knows, women have a few days every month..."

"Don't look at me."

Konan's expression darkened when Shirozumi turned his gaze toward her.

But there was no helping it. The Akatsuki Organization was overwhelmingly male, with only one girl among them.

Shirozumi withdrew his gaze and continued his PPT presentation.

"In other words, Zetsu only needs to collect this discarded sanitary waste. Combined with Hidan's ability, it would be like holding the lifeline of the Entire Shinobi World in our hands!"

The moment Shirozumi finished speaking, the entire cave abruptly fell so silent it was as if everyone had died.

Konan, the only woman there, especially so.

She had practically stopped breathing.

Almost instantly, Konan decided that she would burn all future trash on the spot, lest it fall into the hands of a pervert like Shirozumi.

"No, White Tiger, what's with that look you're giving me? I'm seriously proposing a plan here! Do you think there's something wrong with it?"

Shirozumi became dissatisfied when he noticed Konan looking at him as though he were a pervert.

"There is. What about the male ninjas?"

Konan took a deep breath, calmed herself, and asked the question.

"As everyone knows, nine out of ten men have hemorrhoids. Someone like Tsuchikage Ōnoki, who could throw out his back just from walking, definitely has hemorrhoids.

White Zetsu just needs to collect the bloodstains from when he wipes his ass.

As for someone like the Raikage, who is strong and healthy and may not have hemorrhoids, that doesn't matter.

As long as we have enough samples, it's the same as having countless hostages. Even those whose blood we can't obtain will still be intimidated—unless they're emotionless loners with no one to care about."

Shirozumi explained.

"Yes, yes, yes! That old man Ōnoki has hemorrhoids! I know that!"

Deidara danced excitedly with his hands waving in the air.

"...That's way too perverted."

Konan sighed.

"No wonder you had to keep it from Hidan. With Hidan's personality, if he found out where the blood came from, he'd definitely think it was an act of 'desecration against Lord Jashin' and refuse."

Kakuzu did not find it particularly perverted and calmly analyzed the matter from the side.

Sasori did not say a word. Crouching inside Hiruko, he was simply glad that he had already abandoned his fleshly body and would not have to worry about a pervert like this targeting his hemorrhoids.