The clouds churned above the South Heaven Gate, while golden light filled the sky. This was the seat of power in the Three Realms, a place of supreme authority that none dared to defy.
On duty today were the Four Heavenly Kings of the Mo Family, who hailed from the Interception Sect. The four of them were bored out of their minds, leaning against a pillar with their eyes closed, half asleep.
Suddenly, a streak of red light tore through the peace stretching across millions of miles.
It was so fast that even the Demon-Reflecting Mirror, which monitored the celestial phenomena, failed to detect it.
Xiruan smashed through layer upon layer of clouds and barreled straight toward the South Heaven Gate.
"Enemy attack—!"
The eldest, Mo Liqing, reacted the fastest. His Qingyun Sword rang as it left its sheath. His three brothers hurriedly brought out their magic treasures, each bracing for battle.
After all, the South Heaven Gate was the face of the Heavenly Court. Who would dare force their way in like this?
The red light abruptly halted, and a fierce wind swept away the clouds and mist.
But the peerless Demon King or three-headed, six-armed fiend they had imagined was nowhere to be seen.
Instead, a tiny little thing, not even as tall as Mo Liqing's knee, stood there quietly.
Xiruan sniffed, eyeing the four strange-looking figures before her with distaste.
"Hey!"
She tossed her Milk Bottle to the ground. It landed with a thunderous crash, and the floor of the South Heaven Gate trembled three times.
"Why does this village committee charge an entrance fee?"
Xiruan pointed at Mo Liqing and cried out in her baby voice, "You, the uncle with the sword, and you, the one holding a rat—hurry up and open the gate!"
"I'm looking for your village chief, Haotian! I've got some personal business with him!"
Village committee?
Village chief?
The Four Heavenly Kings of the Mo Family exchanged baffled looks, their heads buzzing.
This was the Heavenly Court, which ruled over the Three Realms! And its ruler was the Jade Emperor, the Great Heavenly Venerable!
How had the Great Heavenly Venerable become a village chief in this little girl's mouth?
"You insolent brat!"
Mo Liqing's face darkened. Feeling insulted, he pointed the Qingyun Sword at her brow.
"What family are you from, little girl? Did you stop nursing and run off on your own? This is the Heavenly Court, a place of great importance! Get lost now, or I'll teach you a lesson on behalf of your parents!"
"Teach me a lesson?"
Xiruan tilted her head, her little face full of earnestness.
"Daddy said that when you're away from home, if someone points a sword at you, then..."
[Ding! The God-Tier Brat System has activated!]
[Option One: Back down. Reward: One top-grade pacifier.]
[Option Two: Throw a tantrum. Reward: One cotton candy.]
[Option Three: I'm here to collect! If you don't open the door, I'll smash it down! Reward: One drop of Pangu's blood essence!]
Pangu's Essence Blood?
She had no idea what it was, but it sounded delicious!
"I choose option three!"
Xiruan's lips curled into a little devilish smile, revealing her sharp baby canines.
"Then I'll break your sword!"
As the words left her mouth,
a burst of savage, primeval power erupted from her tiny body.
Whoosh!
Xiruan picked up her Milk Bottle and swung it at him.
"Oh no!"
Mo Liqing's scalp prickled. It felt as if an ancient divine mountain were bearing down on him!
He had no time to dodge and could only raise his sword to block.
I have to stop it! This is a top-grade Postnatal Spirit Treasure!
Crack!
The sharp snap made everyone's teeth ache.
The Qingyun Sword, which had once struck terror into the armies of Xiqi, was no match for the Milk Bottle. It shattered on the spot!
Mo Liqing didn't even have time to scream before the Milk Bottle sent him flying, slamming him into the golden pillar behind him.
Silence fell.
The magic treasures in his three brothers' hands nearly dropped from fright.
One move?
A top-grade Postnatal Spirit Treasure shattered, and its wielder was finished?
This little thing was only three years old?!
"Big brother!"
Mo Lihong was the first to recover. He brought out his magic treasure.
"Absorb!"
The Hunyuan Umbrella spun, darkening the sky. A mighty force of suction enveloped Xiruan, trying to pull the terrifying baby into it and dissolve her into sludge.
"That busted umbrella looks like it leaks."
Xiruan gave a disdainful snort.
She shot into the sky, ignoring the Hunyuan Umbrella's suction, and charged straight at Mo Lihong.
Riiip—!
The Hunyuan Umbrella, impervious to water and fire and capable of manipulating Qiankun, was torn apart by her bare hands!
"Since it's broken, you don't need it anymore!"
Xiruan whipped around and slapped Mo Lihong across the face.
Smack—!
Mo Lihong spun eighteen times on the spot, his teeth flying everywhere, before he toppled face-first onto the ground.
"Second brother!"
Mo Lihai trembled with fear. He was just about to pluck the Jade Pipa and launch an attack.
"You're so noisy! You think you're good enough to play music?"
Xiruan casually picked up a piece of sword from the ground and flung it.
The broken blade struck the pipa dead center. Its tremendous momentum sent Mo Lihai flying dozens of meters along with it, pinning him to a pillar.
In the blink of an eye,
only Mo Lishou remained of the Four Heavenly Kings, along with the Purple Gold Flower Fox Mink trembling in his arms.
"I-if you come any closer..."
Mo Lishou's legs were shaking with fear.
"Chitter!"
The Flower Fox Sable, at least, was loyal. It sprang out at the fastest speed of its life and instantly transformed into a giant beast, opening its bloody maw to bite Xixi.
"Wow! A big kitty!"
Xiruan's eyes instantly turned starry.
She slid right up to the Flower Fox Sable, stretched out her chubby little hand, and grabbed it squarely.
"Up!"
With a sweet cry, she put her arms to work.
She lifted the giant Flower Fox Sable clean off the ground, then swung it in a full circle through the air.
"Here you go!"
She used the Flower Fox Sable like a meteor hammer and slammed it into the stunned Mo Lishou.
The man and mink collided. Both rolled their eyes and passed out.
All done.
Xiruan clapped her hands, though there wasn't a speck of dust on them, then picked up a glittering Storage Bag someone had dropped. She swept it with her divine sense.
"There isn't even much money in here. What a poor guy."
She pursed her lips in disgust, then looked up at the enormous plaque marked [South Heaven Gate].
It glittered with golden light, bright enough to hurt her eyes.
"That sign's hung too high. It makes my neck hurt to look at."
Remembering the system's reward, Xiruan grinned.
She raised her Milk Bottle high above her head. Pangu's Power surged through her body as she swung it hard at the plaque, the very symbol of the Heavenly Court's authority!
"Open up for me!"
Rumble—!
The blow shook heaven and earth.
The golden plaque, which had received offerings for millions upon millions of years, was smashed into a shower of golden dust!
The entire Thirty-Three Heavens began to shake violently.
Lingxiao Treasure Hall.
The music played and the dancers whirled.
The Jade Emperor, Haotian, sat high upon his dragon throne, drenched in immortal wine.
"What's going on? An earthquake?"
Before he could lose his temper, a disheveled figure came tumbling into the hall.
"Report—! Your Majesty! We're in trouble!"
The Patrolling Spirit Officer in charge of the rounds was pale with terror.
"Your Majesty! The South Heaven Gate... Someone demolished the South Heaven Gate!"
"What?!"
Haotian shot to his feet. His imperial robes billowed, and the pressure of a quasi-sage swept through the hall, sending the dancers to their knees.
"Who did it? Has Xingtian attacked? Or is it some remnant of the Yao Race?"
"N-no..." The officer stammered. "It was a... a three-year-old girl! She was carrying a Milk Bottle, and she said... she said..."
"What did she say?!"
"She said you were... a village tyrant, and that she was here to collect a debt on her father's behalf!"
A village tyrant?
Collect a debt?
The muscles on Haotian's face twitched. He was so furious he laughed. "How audacious! I've ruled the Three Realms for countless kalpas, and this is the first time anyone's called me a village tyrant!"
"Prepare the imperial carriage!"
He swept his sleeve aside, his expression so dark it looked ready to drip.
"I want to see which family's brat dares to tear down my gate!"
The ruins of the South Heaven Gate settled beneath a blanket of dust.
Xiruan sat on a broken golden pillar, holding a dark-red bead of blood in her hand—the Pangu's Essence Blood awarded by the system.
"This candy bean doesn't look very sweet."
She muttered, then opened her mouth and tossed the drop of essence blood inside. Its energy was potent enough to make a Da Luo Golden Immortal burst apart.
"Crunch."
She bit it like a candy bean and swallowed it.
Then a boundless wellspring of life erupted within her tiny body.
Anyone else would have burst apart on the spot.
But her strange constitution instantly absorbed all that power, leaving only a milky-scented burp.
"Burp~"
Just then,
the Nine-Dragon Chariot appeared, golden light flooding the sky.
Haotian sat upon the dragon chariot. Behind him followed the Pagoda-Bearing Heavenly King and Taibai Jinxing as they descended upon the ruins in a grand procession.
Looking at the destruction below and the little girl sitting amid the rubble, swinging her feet, Haotian could hardly believe his eyes.
She was so tiny!
Had she really caused all this trouble?
"Who goes there?" Haotian suppressed his anger, his voice crashing across the sky like thunder. "Why have you destroyed my heavenly gate and injured my generals?"
Xiruan looked up at the man who was glowing from head to toe.
"Wow, a giant lightbulb."
She pointed a chubby little finger at Haotian's nose.
"Hey, you! The one in the carriage!"
"You're Haotian, the village tyrant who won't repay his debts and likes to imprison lonely old people, aren't you?"
Silence descended over the entire scene.
Taibai Jinxing's jaw nearly hit the ground.
A lightbulb? A village tyrant?
Was this child crazy?
Xiruan didn't care in the slightest. Her Milk Bottle grew larger than she was, and she pointed it at Haotian as she shouted righteously:
"Hand over the keys to your Peach Garden! And Daddy said that if you don't pay up today, I'll tear apart this piece of junk you're riding and sell it for scrap!"
Before you continue