For Xue Mushi, it was only a fleeting, unconscious moment.
As his consciousness gradually awoke from the chaos and void, the first thing he saw was that small cluster of flames. Deep within his soul, the tiny flame sat in stillness and grace, like a motionless painting, yet it drew him ever closer.
Xue Mushi sat cross-legged before the strange fire, gazing at it in silence. In its warm, bright glow, he saw fragments of his past.
He could not remember his earliest childhood. His memories from the ages of three to five were only a few hazy fragments, with no clear causes or consequences. It seemed he could learn about many things only from his elders, and sometimes even wonder, Was I really like that as a child?
There were many things Xue Mushi could not remember.
While the children his age chased their parents' approval, their friends' favor, or goals in cultivation, he let his mind go blank. Each day, he followed the same routine, repeating a dull, monotonous life.
Xue Mushi expected nothing of others and aspired to nothing himself. When he first learned he had a fiancée chosen for him in infancy—and that she was the gifted, highborn Yin-Yang School Saintess, loved and respected by all—his only thought was: Oh.
I'm probably not good enough for her.
What a hassle.
How about we just break off the engagement?
He watched his parents beam with pride over the engagement and silently swallowed his words.
Xue Mushi's life was simple. He went to lessons in the courtyard during the day, then returned home in the evening. He would meet his siblings, chat with them for a while, and share a meal before going back to his room to rest.
During breaks, he stayed in his room and read.