That Could Work

No-Brain and Unhappy set off on their return journey—

—just as the BOSS had said, the trip was very safe. Even without a safety officer looking after them, it had only been a close call.

Supporting each other, they climbed into the back seat of the black Volga.

The car started up again. Amid safety officer David Byrne's curses, the two young men nodded like pecking chicks and promised Mr. David they would never do anything like that again.

Jiang Xueming watched the rocky mosslands flash past outside the window. They were still hidden within the dense fog, their true forms impossible to make out.

Fang Feng grew farther and farther away, while the temporary station marked Sweet Wind drew ever closer.

Xue Ming did not ask any further questions. He solemnly bid Mr. David farewell.

He and Bu Liuxing passed through the ticket gate, changed into new clothes, and immediately boarded the train home without stopping.

He was desperate to get home, worried about his younger sister's illness. This brief, bizarre journey was nearly over, and only once they sat in the warm, comfortable carriage did the two begin talking more.

"Want me to tell you in detail what happened in that Western-style house?" Bu Liuxing propped his chin on both hands and looked at Mr. Xue Ming with great interest.

Jiang Xueming said seriously, "Go ahead. I'm listening—even though I'm not that interested. But it's really great that you came back safe and sound."

"Oh-ho-ho! You care about me? You care about me? Hehe!" A Xing laughed in a sleazy manner. "I knew it. You look all cold and icy, but you've definitely got a warm heart!"

Jiang Xueming remained silent, expressionless.

Bu Liuxing put on a solemn air and got to the point. "Ming Ge, you saved me once on the tunnel wall, and then once again from The Faceless Lady."

"The second one doesn't count." Jiang Xueming interrupted to argue. "That woman was trying to catch you. I wanted to escape with you, so I didn't think much. I didn't even have time to think before I knocked you aside. I wasn't deliberately trying to save you. My body just moved that way."

"Hmph, explain it however you want." Bu Liuxing smiled with pursed lips, deliberately building suspense. "At the time, The Faceless Lady really did want to drag me into the house. Do you know why?"

"You can start from when Pangu split heaven and earth. This train still has over two hours before it reaches Nine Realms Station." Jiang Xueming curled his lip and turned to look out the window, appearing entirely unconcerned.

"She chose me only because she was afraid of you." Bu Liuxing turned serious. "Ming Ge, you seem to have some kind of detached, mad quality about you that made her instinctively want to flee from you."

Jiang Xueming watched the rainy scenery outside gradually turn into vast plains.

Then he said, "Why do I feel like she didn't think that way when she twisted my arm out of its socket?"

"In that house, she and I formed an unusual mental connection." Bu Liuxing explained. "We were the first natural humans in over a hundred years to come into close contact with The Faceless Lady—she wanted to connect with other intelligent species."

The dining car passed beside them. Jiang Xueming casually took two cans of coffee, opened one for Bu Liuxing, and pushed it in front of A Xing—telling him to take his time and explain everything clearly.

A Xing looked melancholy, as though he had remembered something sad.

"The Faceless Lady can affect our brains, manipulate our dreams, and influence our optic nerves, turning her appearance into whoever we know best and are least guarded around—she wanted to have a friendly meeting with us. She was actually pretty friendly."

Jiang Xueming calmly asked, "So she twisted my arm off?"

Bu Liuxing deliberately lowered his voice and explained sincerely, "She can understand us. When she heard us say we were going to use Dump Truck Iaijutsu on her, she was actually pretty nervous, because if we really did it, she couldn't guarantee that we'd still be safe inside the car when the crash happened.

"As for your arm, she asked me to tell you she was sorry. You frightened her. When she grabbed your arms and torso, she never expected you to struggle so hard that you could even break your own arm."

"Tell me about something else." Jiang Xueming held the coffee can, his fingers still trembling from the dull pain in his arm.

Bu Liuxing nodded. "All right. You should remember that after I cut open your clothes, The Faceless Lady also got the phone and the logbook, then hooked fingers with us, right?"

Jiang Xueming nodded along. "Right. I thought she was provoking us."

"She was reminding us that we had left something important behind and wanted us to go back for it." Bu Liuxing explained, "We both misunderstood what the other meant."

Jiang Xueming showed a surprised expression. "I thought—"

"That's right! Exactly what you thought." Bu Liuxing said with a grin. "You saved me twice. I don't like owing people favors, so I figured that even if I had to risk my life, I'd get the phone back."

Jiang Xueming thought it over. "What happened after she caught you?"

Bu Liuxing explained, "She was afraid of you. You reeked from head to toe like contraband, so she decided to talk to me alone first."

Jiang Xueming asked, "Just like that?"

Bu Liuxing replied, "Just like that."

Jiang Xueming asked, "What did you talk about?"

"That's a very, very long story." Bu Liuxing said. "How about I start with the most exciting part?"

Jiang Xueming tried hard but could not pull open the coffee can's tab. Opening A Xing's can earlier had already used up all the strength in his fingers.

"Let's hear it."

Bu Liuxing casually flicked a finger and popped open A Ming's coffee tab in one go.

"The moment I entered, she started touching me like crazy, so I started touching her like crazy too. We felt each other up from the living room to the kitchen. I was strong, and she couldn't handle me, so she tried to tie me up with her tentacles."

Jiang Xueming said, "Wait. Wait—"

Bu Liuxing had no intention of waiting. "Then, when I got caught, I started cutting off my clothes, because her tentacles were covered in a lot of protective oil. They were really slick. If they touched my skin directly and made me slippery too, she wouldn't be able to catch me."

Jiang Xueming said, "Wait. Stop, stop—"

Bu Liuxing still had no intention of stopping. "I ran naked from the first floor to the second, then she dragged me back down to the first. I fell onto the sofa beside the fireplace, and when I turned around—those tentacles weren't like squid tentacles, you know? No suckers. And where they clustered together, that was her real body. Man, what a sight."

A Xing clapped his hands and said animatedly,

"Wasn't that the face of one of my ex-girlfriends? Though I don't remember which ex-girlfriend it was."

Jiang Xueming said, "All right, continue."

A Xing clicked his tongue in amazement. "Then I got ruthless and followed that momentum straight up to plant a French wet kiss on my ex-girlfriend's face."

Jiang Xueming had already entered work mode. He took out his logbook and carefully recorded A Xing's experience in the Western-style house.

A Xing continued, "Those tentacles had originally been pulling me toward The Faceless Lady's arms. But I'm stubborn, so I burrowed right into her embrace. After I kissed her, the tentacles loosened up. I thought, Hey, this might actually work?! Then I looked up and saw The Faceless Lady's monster face, along with several huge holes covered by bluish-gray skin."

Jiang Xueming asked, "You were scared?"

"No. I thought about it." Bu Liuxing said earnestly and firmly, "There was still a sweet taste on my lips and tongue, like the air in Fang Feng, only sweeter. So I figured it could work."

Jiang Xueming said, "..."

"When she hugged me, I kept kissing her. When she squeezed too hard and I couldn't breathe, I kept kissing her. Later, she seemed to realize she couldn't use too much force." Bu Liuxing described it animatedly. "She learned to behave and stopped treating me so roughly. Then—"

A Xing's expression shifted from frivolous amusement to solemn gravity.

"A glowing tentacle extended from her clothes. It split into lots of smaller tentacles, like cable fiber-optic connectors, and shoved into my mouth, ears, and nostrils. It felt so weird! That was seriously stimulating. You should try it too—it was wild."

Jiang Xueming first stood up, then quietly moved to the small table across the aisle.

Bu Liuxing was still puzzled. "Ming Ge, why are you sitting so far away?"

Jiang Xueming said, "Nothing. Keep going. I've written it all down."

"Oh." Bu Liuxing did not think anything was wrong. He only noticed something odd in Ming Ge's disgusted gaze, but did not dwell on it.

He continued.

"Then I heard a sorrowful voice. That was The Faceless Lady talking to me. My eyes started hallucinating too. So many, so many images were crammed into my head like force-feeding ducks—

—I felt like my skull was about to split, so I grabbed The Faceless Lady's hair as hard as I could. I didn't dare grab anywhere else. She seemed to know I couldn't take that kind of stimulation, so she slowed the pace a little."

Jiang Xueming asked blankly, "Could your descriptions be a little more normal and less vulgar?"

Bu Liuxing lightly slapped himself. "Oh, oh, oh, I'll watch it. But I really felt that this kind of communication went far beyond any communication through hearing, touch, smell, or language."

Jiang Xueming continued asking, "What happened afterward?"

"Eventually, that violent stream of information finally slowed down." Bu Liuxing frowned as he organized his thoughts. "I could communicate with her in simple ways—it was very smooth."