Classroom of the Elite, I Have a Life Simulator

But now, it meant reclaiming her sister's smile.

Ichinose Honami reached her hand toward one of them, but the sudden sound of voices nearby made her pull back as if she had been electrocuted.

She hurriedly lowered her head and walked away quickly, pacing around the surrounding counters; lingering for too long would invite suspicion.

Even at a time like this, Ichinose Honami was still engaging in rational thought, which made her feel so disgusted she wanted to vomit.

She blended into the chaotic crowd. Back at school, Ichinose Honami had countless times stood tall with confidence to deliver speeches before the eyes of hundreds or thousands of students, but now she instinctively craved the ability to be invisible, trying to shrink her presence bit by bit.

In these short few minutes, it seemed as if the casual conversations of others were like muffled thunderclaps exploding in Ichinose Honami's ears. If someone so much as glanced at her, Ichinose Honami would have to tremble from head to toe as she scrutinized herself.

In every second of the past fifteen years, Ichinose Honami would never have associated herself with the word criminal.

She wasn't committing a crime; she was doing it for her sister.

A thought suddenly welled up in her heart.

Doing something bad for her sister was no big deal. Compared to the many people in the world who did bad things, she was the most deserving of forgiveness.

This thought occupied her mind, and Ichinose Honami's hand suddenly became much steadier, a strange and peculiar sense of relief slowly emerging from the depths of her soul.

Ichinose Honami needed this ethereal self-consolation, as if doing so would prevent her actions from appearing too shameless.

She gripped the hair clip with a posture as natural as could be; a girl like her standing in front of this counter picking out merchandise would not be suspected.

Her sister's smile had now solidified into this small hair clip, firmly clutched in Ichinose Honami's hand. Her graceful figure seemed to settle down all at once, as if she had suddenly gained dozens of pounds of weight, her two feet almost hammered into the smooth, pristine floor tiles.

Ichinose Honami's heart hung stiffly in the air, while her hand uncontrollably tucked the hair clip into the inner pocket of the bag she was holding in her right hand.

She turned around with difficulty and walked into the nearby restroom, almost without looking back.

Inside the restroom stall, in order to reduce the volume, Ichinose Honami somewhat clumsily or perhaps violently tore open the outer packaging of the small item. After flushing the shell down the toilet, she tucked the small hair clip inconspicuously into her inner pocket.

Carrying stolen goods on her person naturally made Ichinose Honami feel ashamed and guilty, but something much heavier pressed down on that emotion.

As she walked out of the restroom and headed toward the exit, Ichinose Honami felt as if something in her heart was missing, just like a full moon bitten by the mythical celestial dog. Every step she took felt like a needle pricking her heart. While desperately enduring this torture, she picked out a pack of gum she wouldn't normally even look at from the checkout counter, as if in atonement.

Ichinose Honami's physical body was still there, smiling at the clerk as she handed over the money, but her soul seemed to be swaying as if it were about to drift away. It wasn't until she stood on the street again, under the scorching sun, that she finally came to her senses.

Ichinose Honami.

Had committed theft.

She stood blankly under the shade of a tree for a while. The sunlight slanted down through the crisscrossing branches and leaves from above Ichinose Honami's head, dragging her shadow into a long stretch. Then, she dragged this long shadow behind her, walking toward home with uneven steps, as if she had just come off some battlefield.

Ichinose Honami walked numbly along this road home for a long time, so long that she found it strange herself.

So, for the first time in a while, she looked up and glanced around. The road on the right was still bustling with traffic, and the glass window of a clothing store on the left reflected a hazy image of her.

Although she had been walking for a while, it was only now that Ichinose Honami seemed to realize what she had done. It was like the effect of some anesthetic had suddenly worn off, like waking up suddenly from a nightmare. Staring at the blurred reflection on the glass window, Ichinose Honami suddenly felt a stinging pain.

She reached out to touch the glass.

To the passing pedestrians, this girl was likely just admiring the gorgeous garment displayed high up in the cabinet.

Ichinose Honami clutched her own throat. In her field of vision, the person in the mirror wasn't herself, but a nightmare from the past that had suddenly walked out of the darkness, making her feel momentarily dazed and afraid.

A thought even crossed her mind to return the hair clip.

But Ichinose then thought of her sister and mother. She imagined the scene of herself handing the hair clip to her sister, and a surge of immense pride welled up in her heart. All the blood in her body rushed to her head, and she fell into a brief, illusory pleasure.

In this dreamlike state, Ichinose Honami quickened her pace.

As if fleeing from a murder scene.

Under the blindingly blue sky, the girl trotted all the way home.

Chapter 4: The Guilty (Part 2)

The door to the Kitagawa house across the hall was wide open. Kitagawa Ryo was leaning lazily against the wall outside, the white cat on his shoulder slightly opening its eyes. Its colors, as pure and brilliant as fluorite, carried an ultimate beauty, but it closed its eyes again as if uninterested, curling into a soft white ball.

"Good afternoon."

Kitagawa Ryo looked at the slightly panting Ichinose Honami.

"You seem to have run into some trouble, Ichinose-san."

Kitagawa Ryo, the somewhat strange neighbor who had moved in at the beginning of this month.

Ichinose Honami didn't like to label people, but for Kitagawa Ryo, she could only make such a definition on her own.

Aside from the polite visit when he first arrived and the casual encounters and customary greetings in daily life, this boy, who was only a year older than Ichinose Honami, had always seemed to be a recluse. Ichinose Honami's conversations with him had been limited to that initial meeting.

"Thank you for your concern, Kitagawa-kun, it's nothing."

Without much thought, Ichinose Honami instinctively rejected his inquiry.

She fumbled for her keys. Ever since her sister and mother argued last time, Ichinose Maki had been locking herself in her room. It was fine now that it was summer vacation, but Ichinose Honami was more afraid that her sister would remain stubborn until school started.

Therefore, she had to quickly hand that hair clip to Ichinose Maki as a belated birthday gift.

"Uh, Ichinose-san's sister is in my living room right now, playing with Hotaru until she got tired, and she just fell asleep."

Kitagawa Ryo stepped aside. Ichinose, standing outside the door, leaned in and quickly saw her sister sleeping groggily on the large sofa in the other's living room, covered with a thin air-conditioning blanket.

Ichinose Honami naturally knew about her sister's fondness for Kitagawa Ryo's white cat named "Hotaru." It seemed that after her sister's mood had been poor these past two days, she liked sticking to Hotaru even more, and every time Ichinose Maki went over to pet the cat, Kitagawa Ryo would generously leave the door open.

"Thank you for the trouble..."

Ichinose Honami composed her thoughts and emotions, gradually steadying her once-hurried breathing before bowing to apologize to Kitagawa Ryo.

"It's fine."

Kitagawa Ryo shook his head in silence. Upon first meeting him, one might perceive him as the cold and aloof type; although according to Ichinose Maki, "Kitagawa Ryo is a very kind older brother," Ichinose Honami felt a wave of relief upon hearing that he held no grudge.

"Ichinose-san's sister has been acting a bit strange these past two days. Though it may be presumptuous, would you mind telling me what happened?"

The emotions that had just settled suddenly surged back up, and Ichinose spoke almost instinctively:

"No, nothing happened."

Because her tone was too blunt, Ichinose Honami quickly offered a wry smile and apologized:

"Thank you for taking care of Maki during this time, Kitagawa-kun. Regardless, I will handle it as soon as possible."

Since she had put it that way, Kitagawa Ryo did not press further. After Ichinose Honami whispered her thanks, she woke her sister, and the two sisters bid farewell to Kitagawa Ryo together before closing the door.

Because she still had to deliver food to her mother, Ichinose Honami hurried to prepare the ingredients. Ichinose Maki, who was yawning, had no intention of communicating with her sister and went straight back to her room.

After placing the finished dinner on the table and leaving a note for her sister, Ichinose Honami packed her mother's portion into a bento box and returned to the hospital.

Before leaving, Ichinose Honami tucked the hair clip into her textbook, planning to give her sister a surprise when she returned that night.

She stopped thinking about the origin of the hair clip; Ichinose Honami had long since decided to bury this matter in the deepest part of her heart. Her steps felt inexplicably light, and her mood had brightened as well.

On the way to the hospital, Ichinose Honami looked up and saw the setting sun. It hung heavily on the branches like a blood-red fruit, and the irises in the green belt were as bright as spring, grinning at her.

Ichinose Honami ate with her mother. Her mother sat on the bed, and since her health had improved slightly, she kept fussing about being discharged. Ichinose Honami could only coax her like a child. Knowing the reason for her mother's current illness, she sat on the edge of the bed, held her mother's hand, and said:

"Maki... will be fine in a couple of days."

It was like a comfort, and yet also a promise; but coming from Ichinose Honami's lips, it transformed into an unshakable fact.

And so, her mother finally set her heart at ease. She trusted her daughter, a trust accumulated over every single second of the past fifteen years.

They began to eat with smiles. The mother and daughter ate mouthful by mouthful, and the two silhouettes cast by the light on the glass window repeated the same movements, looking almost like a feast for four.

Seeing the oil on the corner of Ichinose Honami's mouth, her mother reached out with a handkerchief and wiped it away carefully:

"Like a little child."

Ichinose Honami's face flushed, and she lowered her head, poking the corner of her mouth with her right index finger as if afraid there might still be oil left.

When Ichinose Honami walked out of the hospital, the silvery moonlight had already blanketed the earth. The night streets were no less bustling than the day; groups of salarymen who had stumbled out of some izakaya were drunk and shouting, Shibuya-style women in high heels and heavy makeup were smoking cigarettes while waiting for someone, and couples of her age were whispering with their heads leaned together.

But her heart seemed to have quieted down. Ichinose Honami walked toward home along the texture of the moonlight, without any obstacles.

Several hours had passed, and she had yet to hear any rumors about lost items. As Ichinose Honami passed that department store, it was still brightly lit, the massive flow of people no less than it had been during the day, weaving back and forth between the shelves.

Ichinose Honami was merely a tiny member of that crowd, and that hair clip was nothing more than one small item among many.

Right?

Ichinose Honami clutched a flyer she had just received; the midsummer fireworks festival would be held at the end of the month.

She looked up, waiting for the fireworks to rise into the night sky, amidst the street crowd and the sparse stars under the moon.

When Ichinose Honami returned home, her sister had already turned off the lights, and the plates on the table were gone. Ichinose Honami opened the cupboard; they were washed and stacked there, suggesting her sister had habitually washed the dishes after eating.

She once again solidified the fact that her sister was not a bad child.

Her mother was a mother who had done no wrong, and her sister was a sister who had done no wrong. Their reconciliation only needed that one small catalyst; the current cold war was merely a child throwing a tantrum.

Feeling the heat of the water from the showerhead touch her skin, Ichinose Honami instinctively shivered at first, then quietly closed her eyes, feeling the rush of the hot water.

If she gave the hair clip to her sister tomorrow morning, she would be happy, right? And then, she could naturally suggest that she go visit their mother...

Holding onto this thought, Ichinose Honami lifted her clear, bright eyes to the stark white ceiling. With her hair plastered to her face by the water, she stood up and pushed aside the shower gel sitting on the shelf.

The morning dew was held up by a leaf. In that instant, it was so beautiful, crystal clear and reflecting the radiance of the sun, as if it were glowing golden itself. The proud dewdrops gradually became plump, weighing the leaf down heavily.

Until the very next moment, when they shattered into pieces.

Ichinose Honami knelt blankly in front of her mother's hospital bed. The woman before her had stopped crying, but her sobs seemed to still echo in her ears. Those cries were like dust floating in the air, drilling into her ears like tiny fish, burrowing into her brain, and lingering there for a long time.

An hour ago, Ichinose Honami had seen her loved one at her most joyful. That joy, emanating from the heart, had felt like a spring breeze, almost washing away the guilt within her. But now, an hour later, she was facing her loved one at her most furious.

Ichinose Maki naturally would not have thought that this hair clip was something her sister had stolen. Just as Ichinose Honami had expected, after receiving the clip, she had agreed to visit their mother, even though Honami had just made her promise to keep it a secret.

But her sister clearly hadn't cared; to her, in that moment, she had been dying to show that hair clip to the whole world.

Except for one person.

Her mother bit her lip, staring at Ichinose Honami. The hair clip lay on the bedside table nearby, and her face suddenly turned rigid:

"Where did you get this?"

"...I took it from the mall."

"Where did you get the money?"

Perhaps she wanted to struggle against the truth for a moment longer, or perhaps she simply refused to believe that the daughter before her would commit an act of theft, but her mother asked a question that was entirely unnecessary with trembling lips.

"The hair clip... I stole it."

Ichinose Honami said it honestly, closing her eyes as she waited for the judgment.

Her mother had never struck her or Maki before; even last time, when Maki had thrown a tantrum and cursed her with the most unreasonable words, her mother had only apologized desperately.

But this time, Ichinose Honami truly received a heavy, stinging slap.

Whether it was from a strength her mother had summoned from nowhere, or because she had already surrendered control over her own body, Ichinose Honami's frame trembled as she collapsed to the floor.

The entire hospital room fell into an extraordinary silence, as if time itself had paused in that instant. Ichinose Honami sat on the floor in that fallen posture for a long time, and it was her mother, rising from the hospital bed with a grim face, who pulled her up.

Despite still being ill, her mother suddenly exuded an unquestionable aura of authority as she grabbed Ichinose Honami's hand and dragged her toward the exit.

Ichinose Honami knew exactly what her mother intended to do, and she understood her mother's methods of discipline, but she lacked the courage to speak up and even less of a reason to refuse.

She felt as though she were already standing on the edge of a cliff, suspended in mid-air; for the first time, the omnipotent Ichinose Honami revealed a look of helplessness, but it met her mother's gaze, and she felt a chill run through her entire body.

Ichinose Honami had committed a theft that violated the principles of her past fifteen years of life.

Her mother intended to make her burn away everything from those past fifteen years.

Her paranoid mother dragged Ichinose Honami to the department store, the very place where an equally paranoid girl had been just yesterday.

Her mother publicly exposed her daughter's crime before the crowd, convinced that only such a painful consequence could force Ichinose to truly reflect.

Ichinose Honami knelt on the ground in a dogeza posture, and beside her, her mother knelt as well.

The onlookers surrounding them included professionals in suits, students from the same junior high school as Ichinose wearing their uniforms, and, more than anyone else, housewives out shopping.

Ichinose Honami suddenly realized that the individual known as "Ichinose Honami," which she had constructed over the past few years, was burning away; all her memories, events, and relationships were like piles of firewood—she had done her job too well, and they were stacked exceptionally high.

Consequently, the fire burned with a terrifying intensity, crackling and popping, as the thing called trust turned to ash and drifted away.

Ichinose Honami was put on display like a statue; the gazes of the onlookers were like knives, slicing away all her dignity, while their lips acted like millstones, grinding the truth into a sticky pulp before whispering it to yet another circle of gathering people.

Ichinose Honami was a strong and brave girl, and although all of this shook her to her core, she knew this was a sin she had committed, so she pressed her lips together and endured it.

What truly destroyed her was her mother, who had knelt down right beside her.

Perhaps her mother felt this was the punishment for her own failure in raising her.