Smuggled

"Hello to all my followers, and to all the fans who haven't had time to follow me yet! I'm Big Machine, the king of phone reviews."

"The phone I'm reviewing today is one everyone should be paying attention to. It's been insanely popular lately—red-hot beyond belief."

"That's right, I'm talking about... the Cannon Phone!"

"To be honest, when I first heard its name, I rejected it."

"Cannon Phone? That sounded ridiculously stupid. Hearing that name, you could practically picture some grimy, blackened little workshop, a bunch of roughneck guys digging discarded parts out of mountains of electronic waste and assembling them into a crappy phone. That was my initial impression."

"I swore right then that I could never like this phone. Even if I jumped off a building and died outside, I still wouldn't use it!"

"Now, after using it for several weeks, I have no choice but to say: it's amazing!"

"It's too amazing!"

"After using the Cannon Phone, every other phone I own has become completely bland!"

"First of all, the Cannon Phone isn't without flaws. Many of its specs don't measure up to the top phones currently on the market. For example, the new Chrysanthemum Phone and Pear Phone that came out a few days ago both have cameras with much higher pixel counts than the Cannon Phone."

"However, after testing them, I was astonished to find that the Cannon Phone took the best photos out of all these phones!"

"Please take a look at the pictures!"

Several pictures were posted, each with a caption underneath.

All the pictures showed the same subject: a little white rabbit lying on a sofa.

The first was a rabbit photo taken with a Chrysanthemum Phone. It was very clear and fairly bright.

The second was a rabbit photo taken with