The Dragon Ball Version of "Tan Tan" for Everyone

Future Trunks's sulking was none of Vegeta's concern. He had no interest, and certainly no time, to babysit him. Trunks was a grown man; he needed to stand on his own two feet!

What had Vegeta riled up now was being ignored. First, that guy had rejected his challenge, and then, right in front of him, he'd admitted he wanted to get with Vegeta's woman.

Bulma had pretended she hadn't heard, but Vegeta still couldn't accept it!

Did the guy really think Vegeta hadn't noticed Bulma's heart racing and her cheeks flushing right away?

Whoosh~~~!!

Vegeta's golden aura surged with unprecedented power. In that moment, fueled by humiliation and rage, he exploded!

His power level jumped by a full 200 million, soaring to 800 million in an instant. Even Frieza was taken aback!

What the hell? Saiyans were completely ridiculous!

Bam~~~!!!

Vegeta's fist slammed into Android 17's chest. Android 17 blocked it with both arms, but the immense force still cracked the ground behind him all the way through.

Frieza's eyes narrowed. The divine power within him surged into the earth, reinforcing the ground as much as he could.

As soon as the fighting began, everyone's attention snapped back to the battle. Even Future Trunks watched Vegeta and Android 17 with a tense expression.

Android 17 really didn't want to fight. He'd already found his target. The fact that Bulma had already had a child wasn't something he cared about. Once he completed his mission, the devices inside him would shut down permanently.

He had no choice!

Just as Vegeta was relentlessly attacking him, Android 17 had no choice either. He could only defend and counterattack with everything he had.

There was a difference of 100 million between 800 million and 900 million, but battles weren't decided by power levels alone. Especially when Vegeta kept appearing in impossible places, which gave Android 17 a massive headache.

He'd already taken plenty of hits, crashed through one mountain after another, and left craters of all sizes in the ground. His clothes were torn, and a gash marked his face.

Touching the cut on his face, Android 17 flew into a rage!

He was counting on that face to charm Bulma. A scar would be a huge loss, and it could determine whether he completed his mission!

"Vegeta!! You're asking for it!!"

Buzz~~

"Ha~~!"

His aura flared, and a transparent wall of energy appeared, blocking Vegeta's next kick from behind. Android 17 immediately followed up with a sweeping dragon-tail kick.

Android 17 had been forced to use his energy barrier, a life-saving technique he could only use three times a day!

Bam~!!

Thud~ thud~ thud-thud-thud~~

Vegeta was caught off guard by the kick. His Shift, which had worked every time except against Frieza, had actually been blocked by this pretty boy!

He crashed through several mountains before finally absorbing the force of Android 17's kick. Furious, Vegeta roared.

"Damn it~ damn it~!! I'm the Prince of the Saiyans! You dare covet my woman? I'll make sure you can't be a man anymore!!"

Frieza thought he could hear the background music that only played during battles in Dragon Ball.

Dun~ dun-dun~ dun! Dun~ dun-dun!! Dun~~ dun! Dun~~ dun! Dun-dun~ dun! Dun-dun~ dun-dun~ dun!! Dun~ dun~ dun~ dun!!! Dun-dun-dun-dun!

"Hey, Chi-Chi, Goku's stable now, right? Oh, oh, got it!"

A bead of sweat appeared on Frieza's forehead. What the hell? That was Bulma's ringtone!

A traditional plow had just encountered a musical staff.

Unbelievable!

Bam~ bam~ bam!!

Dwang~~

Android 17 headbutted Vegeta. The two of them moved in perfect sync, clutching their heads and crouching down on the ground.

In the end, Vegeta proved more resilient. He clenched his fists at his waist, bent his knees slightly, opened his mouth wide, and began howling for all he was worth.

"Ahhhhh!!!"

Thump~ thump~ thump~~

Vegeta transformed again, taking on the Super Saiyan muscle form. His whole body grew tremendously muscular and rock-hard, making Bulma drool.

If he didn't have that lump on his head, he'd look even more intimidating.

As it was, the lump just made him look a little ridiculous.

"Pfft~~"

Frieza couldn't help laughing. He didn't know why his sense of humor had gotten weaker and weaker, but Vegeta's appearance really was too funny.

In his muscle form, Vegeta's power level instantly soared to 1.2 billion. It was terrifying, to say the least.

Whoosh~

Vegeta knew he was too slow in this form, so he promptly used Shift.

He kicked straight at Android 17's groin, putting everything into a single, ball-crushing blow.

Android 17 didn't react in time. His head was still spinning.

He and Android 18 both had endless energy, so they wouldn't grow weak as a fight dragged on. But they could still feel pain.

And now, when Vegeta suddenly appeared in front of him, Android 17 couldn't mount an effective defense. Was instinctively clamping his legs together really going to help?

If he'd been facing someone around his own power level, that move might actually have worked.

But he was up against an enraged, muscle-bound Vegeta. His instinctive defense seemed so utterly feeble.

Android 18 had already covered her eyes. She could imagine the ball-crushing scene perfectly. For a moment, she wasn't thinking about saving Android 17, but about how he'd never be able to complete his mission.

Only Frieza, on Vegeta's side, could stop what was about to happen.

But why would he stop it?

Frieza had lost his reproductive organs when he crossed over, and he wanted everyone else to be just like him!

So not only did he let Vegeta go ahead, he also learned a lot from watching. The next time someone annoyed him, he could try this kick too.

Look at the angle, force, and speed of Vegeta's kick. It was impeccable—steady, accurate, and ruthless. Frieza was watching with rapt attention, thoroughly enjoying himself!

Boom~!!

Hmm?

That didn't sound right. Shouldn't there have been a "pop" as the balls shattered? Had he kicked Android 17 so hard he'd blown him apart completely?

Wasn't that a little too violent?

The wind blew past!

The dust settled~

Vegeta had been stomped into the ground by a huge foot. His whole body was twitching, as if he might stop breathing at any moment.

His head was buried in the dirt, leaving him unable to breathe!

Whoosh~~!!

Future Trunks's golden aura shot into the sky, his hair standing on end with rage for his own father!

Whoosh~~!!

A purple aura shot into the sky.

Frieza was furious!

He'd been enjoying the show, and then that big lug, Android 16, had to barge in and ruin it. Was he trying to get himself killed?!

Whoosh~

Whoosh~

Future Trunks and Frieza moved at the same time!

Bam~

Whoosh~

Clang~

Frieza's tail sent Future Trunks flying. This time, even Son Gohan didn't have time to catch him.

Krillin put both hands to his forehead and said with a sigh, "Conan—uh, Trunks really never learns, does he? How many times has he been beaten up now?"

Tien Shinhan blinked all three eyes, then solemnly raised a hand and started counting.

"First, Frieza knocked him around in the sky. Second, he got hit by a spaceship. Third..."

Bam~~!!!

Frieza kicked Android 16 in the chin, launching him into the sky. Then Frieza recalled the move Vegeta had just used.

Whoosh~

He Shifted in front of Android 16 and kicked out with even greater speed, precision, and ruthlessness than Vegeta.

That kick was the epitome of grace, unmatched in the world, and a thunderbolt from a clear sky.

Dwang~~!!!

"Yow~~~ It hurts~~ Ow, ow, ow~~ It hurts! My foot~ my foot~ my foot, foot, foot, foot, foot~~ My foot's going to be ruined~~ Ow~~ Ow, ow, ow, ow!!"

The Dragon Ball version of "Tan Tan"—for everyone!

Lyrics by: Little Golden Turtle!

Performed by: Frieza!

At last, Tien Shinhan said what came next.

"Counting Bulma's slap, that should make seven times, right? Conan—uh, Trunks is pretty pitiful!"

Bulma flew into a rage!!

She lifted Baby Trunks with both hands and pointed his little chili pepper at the two of them!

"Trunks, fire!!"

Don't say I'm padding this out. Every chapter of mine is around 2,400 characters, which is a lot more substantial than those that barely scrape by at 2,000!

If nothing unexpected happens, I can still update another chapter tonight.

As long as you enjoy reading, that's all I ask. If I made you laugh, I've achieved my goal—whether it was a deadpan laugh, a mocking laugh, a happy laugh, or a laugh you couldn't hold back!

Finally, good morning, everyone!