Taking Off!

Ye Ning clasped his hands behind his head and strolled home.

The first thing he saw was Tsunade, fuming as she hugged her two enormous breasts, gazing resentfully toward the grounds beyond the Senju Clan Grounds like a neglected wife. Every so often, she sneaked a sip of liquor.

The moment she saw Ye Ning coming back, Tsunade's face tightened.

"What, you finally remembered to come home? You were gone all day and didn't even think to take me with you?"

Tsunade had spent the entire day at home, without going anywhere.

She'd thought Ye Ning had just gone out for a little while and would be back soon. She hadn't expected him to spend the whole day out having fun!

Without Ye Ning around, Tsunade had suddenly lost interest in everything.

Even drinking felt a little dull.

Why did she feel so uncomfortable if she didn't trade a few barbs with Ye Ning?

"Tsunade, why are you waiting here?"

Ye Ning stepped over the threshold, looking curious.

"Don't tell me you sat here waiting for me all day?"

"Who was waiting for you? Don't flatter yourself!"

Like a cat whose tail had been stepped on, Tsunade bristled.

"I just feel like drinking here. So what?"

Ye Ning was baffled. Why was she getting worked up when they'd barely exchanged a few words?

Was it that time of the month?

She was in such a foul mood.

Realizing Tsunade might be on her period, Ye Ning wisely kept his mouth shut.

Arguing with her now would be pure suicide.

A couple of words back and forth, and he'd probably get a loving punch.

When Ye Ning stopped arguing and walked past her toward the courtyard, Tsunade hurriedly called after him.

"You went out today. Why didn't you call me?"

Ye Ning turned around, utterly confused.

Seriously, were you picking a fight?

Did you just have to punch me to blow off steam today?

I didn't call you?

You were sleeping like a log, and now you're blaming me for not waking you?

To shut Tsunade up once and for all, Ye Ning decided to explain where he'd been that day.

"When I came to get you today, I called you three times in a row, but you didn't react, so I had to go out by myself. I even got lost at first and ended up near a forest. I ran into a student from the Ninja Academy, and followed him back here."

"Then, at a hot-spring inn one street away from the Senju Clan Grounds, I found Jiraiya."

"Jiraiya's back?"

Tsunade took a sip of liquor, looking surprised.

The last time she'd seen him... had it really been more than three years ago?

That guy had met three war orphans and suddenly felt a pang of compassion. He'd stayed in the Land of Rain, saying he was going to teach the three brats.

Now that she thought about it, three years had passed. It was about time Jiraiya came back.

"When I found him, he was peeping."

"Peeping...?"

Tsunade's lips twitched, and her joy at the prospect of seeing an old friend again vanished in an instant.

Of course. She shouldn't have expected anything from Jiraiya.

That guy was a complete and utter bastard!

The first thing he did after returning to Konoha wasn't to find his old friend, whom he hadn't seen in years, and catch up. Instead, he went to peep at a hot-spring inn?

Tsunade rolled her eyes.

A dog couldn't change its spots.

"And then?"

"Then I gave him a talking-to. No, to be precise, I kindly taught him a lesson. After all, if no one teaches you, it's easy to make the mistake of behaving so indecently."

Ye Ning wore a mild, scholarly smile.

"Under my patient guidance, Jiraiya finally realized his mistake and decided to turn over a new leaf."

"Turn over a new leaf? Him?"

Tsunade scoffed at Ye Ning's claim.

If Jiraiya could kick his peeping habit, pigs could climb walls!

"He really did feel deep remorse and realize his mistake. After all, he swore that if he ever peeped again, he'd never be able to get it up and would have a houseful of children. I don't think anyone would make a vow like that unless they really wanted it to come true."

Tsunade froze.

Jiraiya had really sworn to that?

It was hard to even imagine!

But Tsunade soon realized that Ye Ning must have forced Jiraiya to make that vow.

"Hey, Ye Ning, isn't it a little wrong to talk about people behind their backs?"

An irritated voice came from atop the courtyard wall. Looking over, they saw Jiraiya crouched on the wall.

Damn...

Jiraiya had made that vow, and it seemed he really might be able to kick his peeping habit!

Tsunade glanced at the wall and nodded to herself. After all, he was already up there.

Seeing that Tsunade and Ye Ning had noticed him, Jiraiya stood up, leaped down into the courtyard, and struck a bizarre pose as he landed, convinced he looked cool.

Ye Ning's eyebrows twitched as he struggled not to laugh.

When it came to being embarrassingly awkward, I'd call you second best.

As for first place... that would definitely go to Might Guy.

Ye Ning spread his hands, looking innocent. "I wasn't talking about you behind your back. Was anything I just said wrong? Or have you still not turned over a new leaf and only given up peeping because of your vow?"

"H-how could that be?"

Jiraiya gave an awkward laugh, regretting it deeply.

He knew this kid was hard to handle. Why had he gone and provoked him?

What was the point of getting left speechless again?

Jiraiya simply ignored Ye Ning and turned to Tsunade.

She'd become even more beautiful over the years...

A hint of fascination showed in Jiraiya's eyes as his gaze drifted lower...

Before it could get very far, Tsunade strode forward and threw an upward punch that sent Jiraiya flying.

Holy crap!

There he goes!

Ye Ning swallowed, feeling immensely relieved.

He'd known it. Tsunade was definitely on her period today and desperate to vent her temper!

Good thing he hadn't provoked her just now.

Or maybe Jiraiya had taken the hit for him?

Poor Jiraiya traced a graceful arc through the air before plummeting back down like a free-falling stone.

After knocking Jiraiya flying, Tsunade walked back with a blank expression, still holding a bottle of liquor. The whole scene was bizarre beyond words.

"Ugh... that hurts, that hurts!"

Jiraiya, tough as nails, limped back with his face scrunched up. Tsunade's punch had clearly packed a wallop.

"Come on, Tsunade, it's been over three years since we last saw each other, and you hit me the moment we meet? That's not fair! What kind of a welcome is that?"

Tsunade snorted.

"I'm just helping you relive the memories of three years ago. What, not satisfied? I can give you another punch."

"N-no, I'm satisfied! Absolutely satisfied!"