"Even if those filthy, battered sunglasses were offered up as a sacrifice, all we'd be doing is getting rid of dead weight. I've wanted to say this for a long time, Hasegawa—you simply aren't suited to wearing sunglasses!"
"Asshole! Sunglasses are a man's second face! There isn't a man in this world who isn't suited to sunglasses! Filthy and battered? Compared to the BOSS's lousy chair that has no idea how much pressure it's endured, my sunglasses, which I've meticulously cared for, are a flawlessly preserved work of art!"
"..." The sight of the two "aberrations" arguing while kneeling on the ground made black lines creep across Sogo Doma's face. "Um..."
Unfortunately, the "aberrations," now thoroughly worked up, seemed to have completely ignored him.
"Hasegawa, what do you mean, it has no idea how much pressure it's endured? Are you saying I'm fat?" the short, pudgy BOSS asked, his face full of disbelief at being talked back to by his sunglass-wearing subordinate.
"BOSS, don't you hear the chair crying out every time you sit down? Rather than making it bear a weight it was never meant to bear in its lifetime, wouldn't it be better to offer it to this gentleman as a sacrifice? That way, everyone wins..."
"Hasegawa, you really are calling me fat, aren't you?" A vein popped on the short, pudgy BOSS's forehead. "What crying out? That's just the chair's massage function activating! I'm only a little plump, just a little plump! Why do you keep finding roundabout ways to say I'm fat...?
"Dammit, you've made me angry! Unless you immediately offer up your sunglasses and kneel to beg this gentleman to show mercy and spare us from the claw machine witch, I won't forgive you, Hasegawa!"
"It was the BOSS who said my face wasn't suited