Konoha.
Some unknown Jinchuriki rolled over in bed.
"Good thing I just passed out after gaming for too long. I thought I'd kicked the bucket."
Naruto.
Before he transmigrated, he'd been gaming all night under the covers.
After staying up too long, he'd fallen asleep and dropped his phone on his face.
As luck would have it, the eight stars aligned, and the magnetic field of Blue Star reversed.
The phone's radio waves resonated with his brain waves, and his soul was swept into the space-time torrent of the solar system, where it underwent a complete transformation.
And so,
Naruto transmigrated!
"Why's the sun out? I wasn't supposed to wake up in the morning!"
Naruto opened his eyes.
A flood of memories instantly surged into his mind.
A lonely Demon Fox boy on a swing. Stealing a scroll and learning the Shadow Clone Technique!
The kind, understanding young lady he'd just met was actually a cute boy, but in the blink of an eye, he'd tried to kill him!
The girl he liked had a thing for a Red Eye boy she found a little annoying, yet she'd formed a bond with him!
In the blink of an eye, he'd taken the Chunin Ninja Exams and handed in a blank exam paper, which just so happened to cater to the examiner's peculiar tastes!
He'd stolen a scroll and met all sorts of inhuman beings, then beaten his childhood friend in the preliminaries with a fart.
And so,
Naruto blinked and immediately figured out where he was.
"I died!"
"I came back to life!"
And he'd become Naruto Uzumaki!
"Whatever, it wasn't the game's fault. It was all because gravity took things too seriously!"
Naruto quickly accepted his new identity.
Before transmigrating, he'd loved playing all kinds of Naruto games and watching the Konoha beauties cosplay and dance.
"Strange. I feel full of energy, but I'm also furious!"
Naruto's cheerful memories were soon overwhelmed by a flood of dark ones.
"I almost forgot that Naruto was too optimistic and had a heart of steel. I'm the kind of guy who'll lose an argument in the comments, then spend the whole night rewatching videos and figuring out what I should've said!"
Naruto took a deep breath, trying to calm himself down.
"I graduated from the Ninja Academy, and I'm already on the Genin roster. I get a good cut, my bloodline's strong, I'm talented, and I've got hidden reserves of energy. I..."
The more Naruto thought about it, the angrier he got.
How could he keep swallowing all this anger?
He'd make sure to walk tall in Konoha and the Ninja World from now on!
"System! If you're not dead, get out here already! I know you're in there!"
Naruto was furious.
What kind of life had Naruto been living every day?
The son of the Fourth Hokage, a Nine-Tails Jinchuriki, and the reincarnation of Asura Chakra—was he supposed to put up with all this crap?
[Beep!] [Having sensed the Host's rage and wicked thoughts, the Turn Back to the Shore System has activated and successfully bound itself to you.] [Complete tasks through your own efforts to earn Goodwill Points. Fail a task and you will receive Punishment Points.] [Goodwill Points and Punishment Points can be used to spin separate prize wheels.]
Naruto saw two prize wheels before him.
The one gleaming with golden light was for Goodwill Points, and it said that one spin cost 10 Goodwill Points.
The dark purple one was for Punishment Points, and it said that one spin cost 100 Punishment Points.
Well, well?
Naruto sucked in a sharp breath.
Something was off with the System!
The prizes on the wheels were completely different, too.
The Goodwill Points wheel had "Frilled Lizard Technique," "Lightning Five-Combo Fist Taijutsu," "Double Suicide Decapitation Technique," "Summoning: Rabbit Family," and "Better Luck Next Time."
What kind of prizes were those?
The Punishment Points prizes were:
"Lightning Style: Lightning Armor," "Rasengan," "Shuriken Shadow Clone Technique," "Summoning Technique: Slug," and "Three More Spins."
Naruto was speechless.
The answer couldn't be more obvious!
"The golden wheel's full of a bunch of useless junk. I can't believe this."
Naruto didn't have the slightest intention of turning back to the shore.
[As you can see, good thoughts take one step at a time until they reach the summit, while the road of evil punishment is difficult to tread.] [That is why each choice of good thoughts is like taking a tiny step toward traveling a thousand miles, while each evil thought is punished harshly.] [When the Host's good thoughts or evil thoughts reach a certain level, you will receive rewards or punishments, respectively.] [The Host's wicked thoughts are rising rapidly. Hurry and extinguish them!] [First task activated.] [Today, you will run into the Perverted Sage, Jiraiya, at the hot springs.] [No matter what, you must not help evil flourish, especially by using the Sexy Technique.] [Use the bearing of an upright gentleman to get him to teach the Host ninjutsu properly. May you become a true Chunin of the righteous path.] [Task success: 10 Goodwill Points.] [Task failure: 100 Punishment Points.]
Naruto's lips curled upward.
He was absolutely going to fail the task.
He'd get 100 Punishment Points and spin the wheel!
After the draw for the third official match yesterday,
the Third Hokage had said
that everyone should take a month off to prepare for the competition.
Naruto had wanted Kakashi to train him, but Kakashi had entrusted him to Ebisu instead.
Today, he was going to find Ebisu, that lecherous Special Jōnin!
Naruto's stomach growled.
He simply got up and made himself a cup of instant noodles.
Then he opened a carton of milk.
"Ptooey!"
The noodles tasted awful, and the milk tasted weird, too.
"It's all expired!"
"Doesn't matter. It won't kill me."
Naruto was convinced his body could handle it.
He headed out.
Konoha was well landscaped, and the air was quite fresh.
The hot springs.
Ebisu was teaching Naruto, in all seriousness, how to gather chakra in the soles of his feet.
That was how one learned to walk on water.
Naruto had wanted to give it a try, but Orochimaru's seal on his stomach was interfering with his chakra flow.
After several failed attempts,
the mist gradually cleared beside the wall.
A white-haired man was crouching there, peeping.
Jiraiya!
"There's a pervert!"
Naruto recognized the Perverted Sage at a glance.
"What are you talking about? I haven't done anything!"
Ebisu panicked, thinking Naruto was talking about him.
"Damn it! What are you shouting about, kid? You nearly ruined my spotless reputation!"
Boom!
The smoke cleared.
Jiraiya was crouched on the back of a giant toad.
The toad was standing on top of Ebisu, who had just passed out.
"You trampled my instructor! You lecher!"
Naruto immediately began forming Hand Seals.
Only three jutsu came easily to mind:
the Shadow Clone Technique, the Sexy Technique, and the Harem Technique!
The Turn Back to the Shore System's task said
Naruto wasn't to use the Sexy Technique, and he was supposed to get Jiraiya to teach him properly.
So,
Naruto was, of course, going to obey!
"What do you mean, lecher? You caught me?"
"I am Jiraiya, the Toad Sage of Mount Myoboku!"
Jiraiya hadn't even finished introducing himself
when two streams of blood nearly shot out of his nose!
Naruto hadn't used the Sexy Technique.
He'd gone straight for the Harem Technique!
He struck Jiraiya, who was in the hot spring, with a devastating blow!
"Good! You're a fine lad! What a genius! You combined the Transformation Technique and the Clone Technique so perfectly!"
Jiraiya wiped away the blood from his nose.
"I'll be your teacher! Let's keep training!"
Jiraiya was just about to teach Naruto with a lecherous grin on his face
when he noticed something unusual about Naruto's stomach as he formed Hand Seals.
He easily removed the seal Orochimaru had left behind.
This time,
Naruto stood on the surface of the water with ease.
He knew full well it was thanks to Jiraiya.
"You've got a bit of talent, at least."
Jiraiya folded his arms and smiled. "Looks like I should teach you something real!"
"Wait!"
Naruto's stomach hurt, so he took off running.
As soon as he came out of the bathroom,
Jiraiya turned and leaped up from beside the wall, grinning as if his scheme had worked.
"Something came up today. Meet me at the Forest Training Ground tomorrow!"
Before Naruto could reply,
Jiraiya had already vanished.
That was it?
"I'll go back and throw out all that expired milk and instant noodles!"
Naruto knew he'd earned some money from missions and could stock up on fresh food.
[Beep!] [The Turn Back to the Shore System detected that Jiraiya had left. The Host failed the task and has received 100 Punishment Points as humiliation!]
"You're just letting me off that easily?"
"That's all the Punishment Points you're going to give me to humiliate me with?"
Naruto wished the System would punish him even more.
[The Host appears to be a little corrupted.] [Host, there's no need to panic. This system is dedicated to helping you devote yourself wholeheartedly to goodness!]
"That's all the better!"
Naruto clapped his hands, cheering himself on.