The Saintess or Wasted Effort

"...We won't leave until we're drunk."

And so, Zhao Linchuan and Bibi Dong drank cup after cup.

The sky outside the window shifted from orange-red to gray-blue, and then into a deep, ink-like darkness.

The moon climbed above the treetops, its cold, clear light spilling across the courtyard, scattered like handfuls of crushed diamonds tossed across the sky.

Bibi Dong drank more and more; her cheeks transitioned from a light flush to a deep crimson, and finally to a flushed, drunken red. Her eyes shifted from clear to hazy, and then into a complete blur.

Her speech began to slur, her movements grew clumsy, and she swayed unsteadily, like a small tree bent by the wind.

Zhao Linchuan had also drunk his fair share. From time to time, he would pick up food for Bibi Dong, pour her wine, and occasionally crack a joke, making her laugh so hard she rocked back and forth, nearly falling off her chair.

When Bibi Dong was thoroughly intoxicated, Zhao Linchuan suddenly changed the tone of the conversation.

"Dong'er, you said before that if I ever needed your help, you would do everything in your power to assist me, right?"

"N-no problem!"

Bibi Dong's face was flushed with wine, and her eyes were barely open, yet she still struggled to straighten her back and patted her chest, her voice loud as if she were afraid someone might not hear her.

"What is it?"

"Do you have something you need this Saintess to help you with?"

"There is indeed a major matter I need your help with."

Zhao Linchuan leaned in close, and Bibi Dong brought her ear near. He whispered mysteriously:

"I need you to help me have a child..."

"Hmph—!" Bibi Dong let out a delicate gasp at these words and shot Zhao Linchuan a look of disdain. "I knew you were up to no good!"

"Well then... my dear Saintess..." Zhao Linchuan's tone carried a hint of temptation. "You wouldn't happen to be going back on your word, would you?"

"How could that be!"

Bibi Dong stood up abruptly, her body swaying so violently she nearly lost her footing, only managing to steady herself by gripping the edge of the table.

She patted Zhao Linchuan on the shoulder, then patted her own chest, declaring in a booming voice:

"This Saintess's word is law! I keep my promises!"

"Isn't it just having a child?"

"Leave it to me!"

"Tell me..."

Before Bibi Dong could finish her sentence, Zhao Linchuan had already risen. He swept one arm around her waist and the other beneath her knees, lifting her up into his arms.

"Hey—! What are you doing!"

Bibi Dong struck Zhao Linchuan's chest, her voice urgent and shy.

"Put this Saintess down at once!"

"Didn't you promise to help me have a child?" Zhao Linchuan deliberately raised an eyebrow, his tone filled with mischief. "You aren't planning to renege, are you?"

"Who's reneging—!"

Bibi Dong withdrew her hands and buried her face in Zhao Linchuan's chest, too embarrassed to look up. Her voice was as faint as a mosquito's hum.

"Whatever you want to do... this Saintess will listen to you..."

"Very well." Zhao Linchuan said gently, carrying her toward the bedroom. "Let's go to your room, and I will teach you properly..."

A long time later, a voice laced with tears drifted intermittently from Bibi Dong's room.

"Wuwuwu... Zhao Linchuan, you bastard... It was one thing when you used your finger to touch my 'center of the brows' last time, but this time you actually used a 'bench leg' to hit me..."

The voice grew softer and more incoherent.

"Just you wait for this Holy Maiden... once I recover my strength... I, I will make you pay!"

"Wu—!!!"

As she spoke, Bibi Dong suddenly let out a sharp sob, her eyes bulging slightly as she stuck out her tongue and muttered:

"Wuwuwu... Zhao Linchuan... you scoundrel... you're so wicked..."

The next day, the sun was high in the sky.

Sunlight poured in through the window lattice, the osmanthus tree outside swayed gently in the morning breeze, and a few sparrows chirped on the branches.

"Ow—!"

A shrill cry suddenly erupted from Bibi Dong's bedroom, startling the sparrows outside into flight.

Zhao Linchuan leaned against the headboard, clutching a fresh, slightly bleeding bite mark on his chest, wincing in pain.

He looked up at the murderous-looking Bibi Dong and spoke first:

"Are you trying to murder your own husband?!"

"You bastard!!"

Bibi Dong grabbed a pillow and began raining blows down on Zhao Linchuan, one after another, fast and fierce. The corners of the pillow struck his body with dull, rhythmic thuds.

Her hair was disheveled, she was stark naked, and her cheeks were flushed crimson. With her eyes rimmed in red, she looked like an agitated kitten, brimming with a mix of fury and shame.

"You actually took advantage of me being drunk to trick me into having your children--!"

She lashed out with all her might, her voice never ceasing:

"And you made me strike such embarrassing poses! You made me say such shameful things!"

It wasn't that Bibi Dong hated Zhao Linchuan for taking her.

On the contrary, she had already sobered up in the middle of the night.

When she woke, Bibi Dong discovered Zhao Linchuan was having his way with her, yet she hadn't immediately turned on him. Instead, she continued to feign drunkenness, allowing him to do as he pleased.

She didn't know why she had done that; perhaps she was addicted to the sensation, or perhaps she was simply afraid of the awkwardness that would follow once she was fully awake.

But now that the sun was up, she didn't know how to face him.

So, she chose the clumsiest method possible—throwing a tantrum...

"Be gentle!"

Zhao Linchuan caught her flailing arms, gave a firm tug, and pulled her entire body into his embrace.

"Do you know that a wife who acts like this is easily disliked by her husband?"

"You wouldn't dare--!"

At these words, Bibi Dong felt her teeth itch. She spoke with bitter resentment, her voice laced with a grinding intensity.

"If you dare to dislike me... I, I will seduce you! And then I'll bite it off!!"

Zhao Linchuan couldn't help but shiver at the threat. He held the struggling Bibi Dong tightly in his arms, watching her look both fierce and cowardly, angry and shy, and retorted viciously:

"How bold! It seems I have no choice but to teach you a lesson."

"What are you planning to do now?"

Bibi Dong slowly stopped struggling, her face showing lingering fear.

"I'm warning you... you are not allowed to make me hold up a 'V' sign with both hands again!"

Her voice softened, carrying a hint of a plea.

"Besides, my body is in terrible shape right now; I can't take any more of your torment!"

"Is that so?"

Zhao Linchuan's tone held a trace of mischievous laughter as his gaze slowly roamed over her face.

"Shall I give you an examination, then?"

As the words left his lips, his hand had just begun to rise—

"Husband--!"

Yan Lingji's voice drifted in from outside.

"Are you there?"

"The Pope has sent someone with a message, saying they want to invite you and Dong'er over."

Zhao Linchuan's hand froze in mid-air—

"I'm here!"

He called out toward the window.

"I'll be right there!"

With that, he lowered his head to look at Bibi Dong in his arms, his tone shifting to one of gentle warmth:

"You just stay here and get some rest. I'll go and explain things to the Pope."