Reincarnation Requires Picking the Right Time

"This novel has already been sent to the 'black room' for review once, so I suppose I can consider myself a veteran author."

"This novel is a fanfiction of Mushoku Tensei. Even if you haven't read the original work, you can still follow along; you just need to know that Rudeus is the protagonist of the original story.

This is a harem novel, but I won't mistreat the original protagonist, nor will I snatch Sylphie or Roxy away from Rudeus. P.S.: Their chests are too small, it's no fun!

I will recruit other female characters whenever possible. The novel is frequently under review and is currently on its Nth revised version. If you like this type of story, I suggest following it chapter by chapter rather than saving them up to read all at once. I hope you all enjoy it."

(The main text starts below!)

This is Akihabara, the holy land of anime. Ever since I started traveling in Japan, this was the place I wanted to visit most.

Wow, it's Ken Kaneki, and there's Miyuki Shiba. Over there is Jibril from No Game No Life. There are so many cosplayers on the street; this really is my paradise. Time to stock up!

The Gurren Lagann Blu-ray collector's edition—wow, I love it, I have to get it. Kill la Kill, Gurren Lagann—I have to buy them all. Can't miss a single one.

Passing by the novel section, I saw a pleasant surprise. I rubbed my eyes; unexpectedly, it had finally been published. Mushoku Tensei: Jobless Reincarnation—this is my favorite novel. Although it's only the first two volumes, I have to get them today.

I bought 20 copies directly, planning to show them off to my best buddies back home and then, amidst their grateful gazes, give the novels to them as souvenirs.

After leaving the shop, I looked at the heavy backpack I was carrying, filled with all my favorites. The sun was scorching the earth, and I carefully shielded the backpack in front of me, terrified that my treasures inside might get bumped or damaged.

Just then, a rumbling engine sound came from afar. What's going on? Isn't the pedestrian light green right now? I looked to my left and saw a dump truck filled with debris rushing toward the crosswalk without slowing down at all. Looking closely, damn it, the driver must have fallen asleep at the wheel. No matter the country, drowsy driving kills!

The truck was barreling toward a woman pushing a baby carriage at about 60 km/h. It happened so fast that I didn't even have time to think; my body subconsciously wanted to do something. I reached out and pushed the woman's back.

At this critical moment, I suddenly felt time slow down. Every second played out frame by frame before my eyes, and I saw the woman and the baby had been pushed to safety. The corners of my mouth inexplicably began to curl upward. Even though I wasn't out of danger, why could I smile?

The truck was only a few meters away. I saw the driver's face as he woke up suddenly and tried to jerk the steering wheel—how careless. I wonder if the compensation for being hit by a car in Japan will reach my parents smoothly.

Without much thought, I subconsciously used the bag in front of me as a shield, hoping it would provide some cushioning. Bang! I lost consciousness.

I don't know how much time passed, but it felt like I was startled awake from a nightmare.

The only sensation I could feel was pain. So, this is what it feels like to be hit by a dump truck.

Through my skin, I felt like I was surrounded by water. I couldn't open my eyes; it was pitch black, as if a membrane was covering them. Am I blind?

My whole body lacked any strength. Is this the effect of anesthesia? I tested it and found I could move my limbs slightly. That's okay; being able to move my limbs means I didn't become disabled.

I tried to breathe, cough, cough, cough—I forgot I was underwater. I choked on water. How am I not suffocating?

Although I couldn't breathe, I didn't feel like I was suffocating either. I groped around in the water with my hand and felt a smooth tube.

It was quite soft! I tried to pinch the tube and tugged on it, attempting to alert the medical staff outside that I had woken up.

As my hand kept squeezing the tube, my head suddenly became dizzy again, with a feeling of oxygen deprivation and chest tightness, like holding my breath for a long time.

So, I really will die if I don't breathe? I squeezed harder and tried to kick the wall of this water tank with my feet to make some noise.

My consciousness slowly faded.

I let go of the tube, preparing to meet my death.

Hoo. As I let go, I suddenly felt a miraculous surge of air in my chest. How could I breathe air underwater? My nose hadn't moved, and there was no breathing motion, yet my consciousness gradually recovered.

I started a new attempt. Although I couldn't see, I could use my hands to touch and my sense of touch to feel the current environment. Perhaps, after becoming a blind man, this is the only way for me to understand this world.

I tried my best to feel around. It was strange here; I felt like I was wrapped in something, and my head seemed to be pressing against something soft. I tried waving my arms to see if I could get out of this strange place.

My arm strength wasn't enough, so I turned my body and gathered strength in my legs, trying to poke through the soft membrane wrapping me, hoping to leave this hellhole!

Dragon God Calendar Year 402, November 11th, Night.

"Dear, it seems to be moving again. Come and feel it."

"Oh, beautiful Aria, the child must have just woken up and is saying good evening to you!"

In the room, there was a man and a woman. The woman was half-leaning against large pillows, her belly bulging high. The man sat on the edge of the bed, gently stroking her belly to feel the resonance of their bloodline. The life inside the belly rotated left and right, occasionally pushing up the large belly with a tiny hand; one could even see the outline of the hand.

The woman said to the man, "I feel like the child is especially lively today. It seems much stronger than before."

"Is that so? I just saw it stop for a moment and thought it was about to fall asleep. I didn't expect it to be so excited now. I guess it can't wait to see its mother."

Ah. The woman clutched her belly and groaned in pain. "I think it kicked me. It feels like my water broke."

The man stood up nervously and shouted outside, "Someone, come quickly! Call the midwife!"

Pain. My whole body hurt. After I used my feet to kick that thin membrane, I felt like I had broken something.

Then, I felt the water around me slowly flowing out, and my body was being squeezed by something strange. Finally, someone realized I was awake. I was ready to leave this hellhole.

After being squeezed into a head-down, feet-up position, I suddenly felt a massive force. I seemed to be squeezed by very resilient flesh. The immense pressure crushed my whole body; my head felt like it was being flattened.

There was no time to think. The only feeling in my head was pain. I wanted to scream out, but I failed; my mouth wouldn't open, my body wouldn't move, and my eyes wouldn't open. Perhaps I really am going to die this time.

In this torture, I don't know how much time passed—it felt like years, yet it also felt like only a few hours.

My endurance had reached its limit. At this moment, I vaguely heard a woman's voice. She was screaming heart-rendingly; it was as if she were screaming out the sound I had been wanting to make all along.

I felt like I had found a kindred spirit. Are we in the same amount of pain? The difference is probably that she can scream it out, while I can only endure it silently!

Not long after, I felt like I slid out from somewhere. My body, which had been wrapped up, was suddenly able to stretch out. It was truly comfortable.

The feeling of pain also ended. I felt like I had been reborn.

I felt the air, and my body tried to breathe. Cough, cough, cough! My nasal cavity and throat were filled with unknown liquid. I struggled to cough the liquid out and tried hard to breathe in the air.

Just then, my bottom was slapped heavily. I used all my strength to try and open my mouth to make a sound. "Waa, waa, waa, waa." I finally cried out, and the liquid in my nose and throat flowed out along with my crying.

I felt a faint glimmer of light in my eyes. I tried to open them, catching sight of flickering candlelight and several busy people. Judging by their attire, were they maids?

I was completely bewildered. What was going on? A strange European man with a handlebar mustache, dressed in odd but intricate formal wear, picked me up. I had no idea what he was saying—what language was this? Smack! He planted a kiss right on my face.

Waaaaah! I was so startled I burst into tears. My first kiss—well, not on the lips, but still. I didn't want to be kissed by a man! Was this some kind of punishment? My first instinct was that he was going to eat me; his massive face and mouth felt like they were half the size of my entire body. Was this the Land of Giants?

I raised my hands and realized I had turned into a child. My hands were tiny, and my arms were covered in chubby rolls of fat. Had I really transmigrated into the body of an infant?

Did this mean I had to go through nine years of compulsory education and three years of hellish college entrance exams all over again? That was too tragic.

To stop the man from kissing me again, I just kept crying. Fortunately, he didn't do anything else weird while I wailed; he looked awkward and handed me over to someone else.

It was a blonde woman who looked to be in her twenties, wearing silk pajamas. She had golden wavy hair and a tear mole at the corner of her eye. Could this be Audrey Hepburn? Her beauty was as clear and pure as morning dew, yet carried the gentleness of the dawn.

Was this my mother? If so, being reborn as a baby might not be so bad.

After she took me, she turned me horizontally and unbuttoned her clothes. Whoa, beautiful lady, don't! Men and women should keep their distance, I thought, though I was secretly thrilled to have intimate contact with a place I hadn't touched since I was a child.

Contrary to my expectations, the actual contact felt a bit hard—completely different from what I had imagined. I could clearly feel the collision of ribs.

I opened my eyes, feeling a bit awkward. I couldn't say there was nothing there, but it was close enough; it was better than a flat board, but only just—like a standard fried egg.

I mimicked the way Kakyoin Noriaki ate a cherry in JoJo, performing the standard procedure for a nursing infant. This was the first time in my twenty years of life that I had seen the source of an infant's food supply. The real thing was quite different from the pictures on the computer.

I decided then and there: I would act like a baby and consume enough nutrition from the start so I could grow up quickly.

"Xerxes, have you decided on a name for the child? Look at him, he's staring at my chest as if he's mesmerized."

"My beautiful Aria, I decided long ago. If it's a boy, we shall call him Dolin Prodia Greyrat. A preference for a flat chest is an indelible gene carved into our Prodia bloodline. Our Prodia clan feels nothing for those two lumps of fat; such deformed existences are only liked by the disgusting Notos."

"Praise be to slender, beautiful women; only such women can be called beautiful. Aria, believe that your child will also marvel at his mother's beauty in the future."

"But husband, I feel like it's too small, as if I can't feed him enough. Shouldn't we hire a wet nurse so he can be full? I'm afraid he'll go hungry."

"Aria, this is your child. The ancestral teaching of the Prodia is that one must nurse their own child. This ensures that after the child is weaned, your beauty will not grow, but rather become even smaller. This is the wisdom passed down by our ancestors; you must persist."

While the couple discussed size, I fell into deep thought. Had I returned to an infant state, or had I transmigrated? Looking at their clothing, this didn't seem to be Japan. The man and woman both had the features of Western Caucasians.

I didn't see any East Asians nearby. There was no electricity in the room, the lighting was provided by candles, and the style of the bed wasn't modern either. Had I returned to the European Middle Ages?

This was too incredible. Those Japanese dump trucks must be toxic, sending people off to transmigrate every single day. I guessed there was no Meng Po in this local area, as my memories were still intact.

I supposed this was a silver lining in a bad situation. I had to learn the language here as quickly as possible. What year was it? Was this even Earth anymore?

Sigh, there were so many things to consider. The family environment seemed decent enough; the room was huge. Even though there were no computers, TVs, or phones, living in a wealthy family and having a harem of wives in the future didn't sound too bad.

Hey, hey, lady, stop bumping me with your ribs! There's no cushioning at all—your ribs are still really hard.