No Childhood Without Being Pervy

The gale howled atop the mountain, while the roar of water never ceased beside the waterfall.

"Little Fatty really didn't lie to me..."

After recalling his past memories, Yun Shenwei slowly opened his eyes and turned to glare fiercely at the two of them.

Though he had remembered the past, he would rather never have remembered it.

"Ah... my spotless reputation!"

Whenever Yun Shenwei thought of how he had followed these two weirdos as a child to peep at senior sisters bathing, blow up cesspits, and do all sorts of ridiculous things... he wanted nothing more than to throw them off the waterfall.

Fortunately, he had a fairly strong mental fortitude. Otherwise, these two would probably have gotten another savage beating today.

"S-S-Senior Brother, have you remembered your childhood memories?"

Skinny Stick trembled under his glare and cautiously asked. He deliberately stressed the words "childhood memories." It was already impressive that he could speak; Little Fatty beside him had been so terrified that he rolled his eyes back and started playing dead...

"For old times' sake, I'll let this slide. Niu Xuante, Xin Daorong, spit it out. Don't waste my time here."

Yun Shenwei could not be bothered wasting time with the two perverts. The aura of a One-Star Dou Zhe erupted from him as he spoke decisively.

"Don't get worked up, don't get worked up!"

The moment Little Fatty Xin Daorong heard Yun Shenwei remember his name, he snapped his eyes open. His round body rolled across the ground like a ball several times before he sprang up and kicked Skinny Stick beside him. Only then did he ingratiatingly say, "We came to you this time because we need your help with something important. Senior Brother, you have to agree."

He blinked hard and tried his best to put on what he believed was a kind smile. Combined with his dark skin, he looked exactly like a little black piglet.

"Get lost!"

Yun Shenwei hated noisy chatter the most. He raised his hand and slapped Xin Daorong flying, then turned to Skinny Stick and lifted his chin. "Niu Xuante, you explain."

"Ah... we really did come to ask for your help with an important matter. Seeing you two on a date before was just an accident. You know how it is—the Glory Trio was founded because of pranks in the first place."

Niu Xuante explained awkwardly, afraid that Yun Shenwei would still hold a grudge over the peeping incident. Little Fatty, who had been sent flying several meters away, rolled back over. Just as he was about to speak, he caught sight of Yun Shenwei's vicious glare and immediately coughed dryly, pretending to be innocent.

"A few days ago, an unfamiliar young man came to the sect. Xin Daorong and I thought he was a new disciple, so we went to prank him. First, we dumped a basin of shit over his head, then we burned his bundle. Only afterward did we learn that he was actually Pill King Gu He's newly accepted disciple, named Liu Wen..."

Niu Xuante continued, "That Liu Wen insisted there was a Pill Recipe given to him by Senior Gu He in that bundle. He said that if we didn't compensate him, he would report us to Senior Gu He. Senior Brother, you know that Senior Gu He comes to our Misty Cloud Sect every few days and has a very good relationship with Sect Leader Yun Yun. If he complains, the two of us will be thrown out of the Misty Cloud Sect!"

"Exactly, exactly, Senior Brother, you have to help us! We've been playing together bare-assed since we were kids. Sure, we used to blow up cesspits and peep at female disciples all the time, but we're still tight! If you don't help us this time, then if we get kicked out later, who knows what we might say."

Xin Daorong somehow found the courage to cut in, deliberately or otherwise issuing a threat. After speaking, he widened his eyes, wearing an expression that said, This is my attitude, deal with it.

"Damn it, those two weirdos actually provoked Pill King Gu He's disciple. That's unbelievable."

After hearing everything, Yun Shenwei kept shaking his head.

Within the Jia Ma Empire, Pill King Gu He was a name known to nearly everyone. These two had provoked Gu He's disciple, dumped shit over him, and even burned his Pill Recipe. They were more absurd than absurd.

At that moment, the Extraordinary Romance System's voice suddenly appeared, and time stopped along with it.

Main Quest triggered. Please make a choice, Host!

Choice 1: Refuse them immediately. Penalty: the Host will lose their current cultivation realm!

Choice 2: Agree to help them. Reward: 100 All Heavens Coin. Note: All Heavens Coin can be used to exchange for items in the All Heavens Mall.

"Choice 2!"

Without even thinking, Yun Shenwei agreed immediately. He would not refuse an Extraordinary Romance System mission if he could help it. Besides, accepting it would not cost him anything.

Main Quest in progress. All Heavens Mall currency has been automatically credited. Since the Host has not previously used the All Heavens Mall, the system will automatically activate Guidance Mode.

Yun Shenwei only felt his vision blur. When he opened his eyes again, he seemed to be standing amid an endless sea of stars, with countless palm-sized stars floating around him.

He casually picked up one of the stars. Before he could examine it closely, the palm-sized star turned into a jade slip.

Nine Heavens Emperor Profound Art, Earth Rank Advanced. Suitable for Metal Attribute cultivators. 10,000 All Heavens Coin.

The jade slip only remained for a few seconds before flying out of Yun Shenwei's hand. Seeing this, he grabbed another passing star. The items displayed inside were either cultivation arts, Dou Skills, or pills... They essentially encompassed every item in the Battle Through the Heavens world, and many things even came from the All Heavens World.

"Too expensive! I can't afford any of this..."

Yun Shenwei released a golden saber and watched it turn back into a star that slowly drifted away, unable to help feeling disappointed.

Then the river of stars before him began to turn, and a light screen appeared in front of Yun Shenwei, listing the items he could currently afford.

Bursting Chili, First Grade Pill. Increases Fire Attribute cultivation speed after use. Maximum usable realm: Dou Zhe. Price: 1 All Heavens Coin.

Happy Whip, Profound Rank Elementary. Made from the tendons and bones of a Happy Beast. Anyone struck by it will laugh uncontrollably for ten minutes. Price: 5 All Heavens Coin.

Dou Qi Bomb, one-time consumable. Can injure a One-Star Great Dou Shi. Using more than 10 increases its damage by one star. Damage stacks up to a maximum of One-Star Dou Ling.

Yun Shenwei looked at the dazzling array of products before him, unsure how to choose. Just then, he suddenly spotted an item, and his eyes lit up.

Basic Pill Refining Technique. Effect: proficiently master the methods for refining all First and Second Grade Pills. Only 38 All Heavens Coin during the special sale.

"This thing is awesome. If I buy it, I'll practically be a Second Grade alchemist. Doesn't that brat Liu Wen want compensation? Fine, I'll compensate him. Hahaha..."

Yun Shenwei's mood instantly brightened. Without another word, he bought it. Not only that, he felt as though a broad road to wealth and prosperity had opened before him.

He looked around the All Heavens Mall for a while longer and saw many interesting items. He even saw Dou Qi experience points. The goods were great, but the prices were right there. After considering things from every angle, he could not bear to buy them and decided to wait and see next time. After all, All Heavens Coin had to be spent where it mattered. What if he spent it all now and another high-difficulty mission came along?

After Yun Shenwei exited the space, time resumed. Niu Xuante and Xin Daorong were staring anxiously at him, so he said:

"No problem. I can agree to it."