Yukinoshita's Correction Method

If Yukino Yukinoshita was allowed to speak her mind...

"Fine." Yukino Yukinoshita drew a light breath. "It's extremely boring. Reading it was actually painful. This work is unimaginably dull."

Yoshiteru Zaimokuza looked as if he'd taken a heavy blow and nearly fell out of his chair.

Dong Yunshan sighed.

Yeah, that was what would happen.

"C-could you tell me which parts are boring, so I can use it as reference?" Yoshiteru Zaimokuza no longer had the strength to keep up his act.

"First of all, your grammar is a complete mess." Yukino Yukinoshita flipped through the manuscript. "Why do you keep using inverted sentences? Do you not even understand how to use particles? Did you not learn this in elementary school?"

"T-that way, it reads more smoothly..." Yoshiteru Zaimokuza struggled weakly. "It makes readers feel more familiar with it..."

"That sense of familiarity has to be built on correctness. Sentences that can't be read properly only trouble people." Yukino Yukinoshita flipped two pages. "Second, the furigana are all wrong too. How does [Phantom Crimson Blade Flash] get annotated as [Bloody Nightmare Slasher]? Where did [Nightmare] come from?"

"T-this is a special style. Recent supernatural battle works all have very distinctive readings..."

"The prerequisite is that someone can understand them." Yukino Yukinoshita pointed straight to the heart of it. "Do you actually want people to understand this work? Oh, and speaking of the work, the plot progression is far too predictable. There's no fun in it at all. Also, why does the heroine take off her clothes here? Logically, there's absolutely no need..."

"Hold on, there's that kind of plot?" Dong Yunshan opened his own copy of the manuscript. "Why didn't you say something sooner about something this exciting?"

Volume Two, Club Activities: The Heavenly Order Turned Upside Down

Every gaze focused on Dong Yunshan.

"Why are you all looking at me?" Dong Yunshan wore an innocent expression. "I'm looking at it critically. How am I supposed to criticize it if I don't read it?"

"And your descriptive sentences are too long, with too many obscure characters." Yukino Yukinoshita shot Dong Yunshan a look. "Also, don't show people a story that isn't even finished yet. Before you flaunt your literary talent, brush up on some common sense first..."

Each word smashed into Yoshiteru Zaimokuza like an iceberg, making him cry out again and again, trembling nonstop.

"Yukinon..." Yui Yuigahama was afraid Yoshiteru Zaimokuza might depart this world then and there, so she spoke up weakly to interrupt.

"I'm not finished." Yukino Yukinoshita set down the manuscript. "But if you have something to say, then you can go instead."

"Huh? I... I have to say something too?" Yui Yuigahama flusteredly picked up the manuscript and flipped through it with a loud rustle. "This... um... that..."

All right, Dong Yunshan had figured it out.

It wasn't that Yui Yuigahama had only read a few pages. She hadn't read it at all.

"Um, I... I think..." Under Yoshiteru Zaimokuza's pleading gaze, Yui Yuigahama grew unbearably guilty and squeezed out with difficulty, "You know so many hard-to-understand words!"

"Pfft!" Yoshiteru Zaimokuza spat out a mouthful of old blood—though not really—and slid from his chair to the floor.

He had burned out, turning into pure white ash.

"Huh?" Yui Yuigahama didn't understand. "Why? I was trying really hard to compliment him."

"Light novels are novels meant to be read easily. Their prose usually uses the everyday spoken style readers are accustomed to, making them relatively simple and easy to understand, suitable for young boys and girls." Dong Yunshan answered Yui Yuigahama's question. "Having hard-to-understand wording is the greatest possible rejection of that kind of work."

"That's it! I knew you'd understand me..." Yoshiteru Zaimokuza struggled to climb back up. "Brother Dong Yun, if it's you, then the world I've depicted, and everything in that world, you will surely understand!"

"Although I only read part of it," Dong Yunshan gave him a "trust me, I'm right" look, "I used some other methods and finally managed to figure it out."

"My good brother!" Yoshiteru Zaimokuza tried to kip up like a carp, failed to get up, and seemed to have used Splash. "My life's work has finally found someone who understands it!"

"I saw it all and kept it in my heart." Dong Yunshan thumped his chest, then took a notebook from his schoolbag. "And wrote it down on paper too."

Yui Yuigahama: "Huh?"

"The school sections come from Full Metal Panic!, the villain organization references Overlord, the monster designs are drawn from Sword Art Online, the ability settings come from A Certain Magical Index, the romantic development between the male and female leads resembles My Little Sister Can Read Kanji, the family situation is close to Book Girl, and the male supporting character is from The Case Files of Jeweler Richard..." Dong Yunshan set down the notebook. "I probably didn't miss anything, right?"

"Aaaaaaah!!!" Yoshiteru Zaimokuza clutched his head and rolled wildly across the floor.

Splash, Splash, Splash, Splash, Splash~

Yui Yuigahama was so frightened that she hid behind Yukino Yukinoshita. "It feels like the damage you caused was higher than both of ours combined."

"Don't you not read light novels?" The moment Yukino Yukinoshita asked, she gave the answer herself. "You have a friend?"

"He works in a doujin circle. He's an expert in this area, so I asked him for advice." Dong Yunshan rubbed his chin in recollection. "He also asked me to give the author one sincere suggestion."

"Advice from a professional? That sounds really impressive." Yui Yuigahama was afraid Yoshiteru Zaimokuza might just die here, so she hurriedly asked, "What was it?"

Dong Yunshan said, "Get a real job."

"Hrgh!" Yoshiteru Zaimokuza let out a terrifying sound and stopped using Splash.

"Oh no, oh no!" Yui Yuigahama jumped in fright. "It looks like he's stopped breathing!"

"You put in this much effort," Yukino Yukinoshita noticed the increasingly brilliant smile on Dong Yunshan's face, "just to see him in this miserable state?"

Dong Yunshan shook his head. "Of course not."

Yukino Yukinoshita was quite surprised. "No?"

"Mm." Dong Yunshan nodded. "It was only a phone call. I didn't put in that much effort."

"In any case..." Yukino Yukinoshita helplessly pressed a hand to her forehead. "This request was completed smoothly as well."

"Huh?" Yui Yuigahama found it unbelievable. "This counts as completed?"

"If he can survive a blow like this, then he should have the ability to face online criticism directly." Yukino Yukinoshita lightly tapped the manuscript with her fingertip. "This is what it truly means to teach a man to fish."

"So you read it all overnight in order to deliver an all-around blow to him?" Dong Yunshan remembered their initial debate. "Not to help him find every mistake, but to polish his spirit until he could face criticism head-on?"

"Your ability to see through to the essence has improved." Yukino Yukinoshita covered her slightly parted mouth and yawned. "You still haven't seen the whole picture, but at least you've made progress."

"Wait." Something stirred in Dong Yunshan's mind, and their recent arguments and bickering roared through his head. "Then all those things you said were also..."

"If I rejected your form, you would think about the meaning within that form. When you tried your hardest to refute me, that was when your thoughts were at their firmest. Keep that up long enough, and before you acted, you would first consider the meaning behind it and prepare yourself to refute me." Yukino Yukinoshita gave a rare, faint smile with real amusement in it. "It seems this method of correction works very well on you. Your reaction was still half a beat slow, but at least you reacted."

"You..." Dong Yunshan opened his mouth. "I..."

"Refute me. Use your refutation to express your agreement with me." Yukino Yukinoshita clasped her hands behind her back and leaned forward slightly in an utterly unguarded posture, lifting a face so cute it ought to have been illegal. Her large eyes curved into happy crescents. "I said before that whether a person succeeds or not is not determined by external traits—and now, the difference is clear."

His messy black hair fell down, casting a blurred shadow over Dong Yunshan's face.

Why had the atmosphere suddenly turned so serious?

A bewildered Yui Yuigahama looked left and right, not quite daring to speak.

"Hah..." Dong Yunshan raised a hand to cover his face and couldn't help laughing aloud. "Hahahahaha!"

All this time, Dong Yunshan had been looking down at Yukino Yukinoshita from the lofty stance of an adult.

He had treated her persistence as a child's stubbornness, her sharp tongue as a child's rebelliousness, her goal as a child's fantasy...

But he had forgotten the words he himself had said.

["I see the green mountains as full of charm; the green mountains must see me the same way."]

"So all those things Yukinon said were to correct Dongyun?" Yui Yuigahama muttered softly. "That doesn't seem quite right..."

"Of course it wouldn't seem right to you." Dong Yunshan, who had laughed enough, let out a long breath. "But in my eyes, Yukinoshita has a privilege."

Yui Yuigahama did not understand. "Privilege?"

Was it because Yukino Yukinoshita was cute?

Was being insulted by a beautiful girl also a kind of pleasure?

Yui Yuigahama silently moved a little farther away from Dong Yunshan.

"Was that half step back of yours deliberate?" Dong Yunshan was almost about to sing. "Such a tiny movement, yet it hurt so much."

"Um... I can understand..." Yui Yuigahama hurriedly waved her hands. "Don't people say it all the time? That a person's, you know, is free."

"You say you understand, but your body is honestly moving away. You've got the wrong idea. It isn't just Yukinoshita. There's you, too." Dong Yunshan pointed at Yoshiteru Zaimokuza, who was lying on the floor like a corpse. "Zaimokuza is the same."

"Me?" Yui Yuigahama pointed at herself blankly. "I have one too?"

She didn't feel as if she had ever had any kind of privilege in front of Dong Yunshan.

"Children's words carry no blame." Yukino Yukinoshita snorted coldly. "Having spent so long in society, he treats us students in school as children. As long as it doesn't involve a matter of principle, a mature adult won't stoop to a child's level."

Children had limited ability and could only win with their tongues.

Adults, on the other hand, had many means at their disposal and did not care about verbal disputes.

No matter how sharp-tongued Yukino Yukinoshita was, if she had to wear cat ears, she still had to wear cat ears. If she had to meow like a cat, she still had to meow like a cat.

That was the so-called composure of an adult.

"Now that you mention it..." Yui Yuigahama recalled Dong Yunshan's previous reactions. "Dongyun really does give off this old-fashioned, world-weary feeling."

"The mature me, as I saw myself, would not stoop to your level." Dong Yunshan made no attempt to hide his admiration. "And if I got worked up because of your sharp tongue, I would become a child throwing a tantrum at a child, which would mean you had successfully corrected my thinking."

"Mm... let me think." Yui Yuigahama's head felt itchy. "So this was a correction method custom-made for Dongyun?"

"It was a correction method custom-made for adults who look down on children, or rather... for children who think of themselves as adults." Dong Yunshan pointed at Yui Yuigahama. "The proof is you."

"Huh? Me?" Yui Yuigahama pointed at herself blankly. She had lost track of how many times she had made that gesture. "I'm part of your flirting too?"

Yukino Yukinoshita said righteously, "It is correction."

"She only said something harsh to you once. After you showed your agreement with her, she became Yukinon." Dong Yunshan noticed that when he said "Yukinon," Yukino Yukinoshita's shoulders clearly trembled. "And I kept refuting her, so she kept being Yukinoshita. But... compared to my refutations, what you hated more was my condescending attitude, wasn't it?"

"The effect was even a little better than I expected." Yukino Yukinoshita lifted her fair chin. "It's fine if you start getting angry now, Dongyun."

"Then your correction will officially succeed, right?" Dong Yunshan brought two fingers together and lightly tapped his temple. "Let me think. When I get angry—no, when I show even the slightest sign of being hurt, the kind and upright Yukinoshita will apologize to me, then declare her victory, and use the demand she wins to offset the punishment she ought to receive."

Slow down... Yui Yuigahama held her head, feeling as if she could no longer keep up with their train of thought.

Weren't these two just a pair of bickering lovebirds flirting?

How had something so simple become this complicated?

Why didn't you two just keep flirting... Even if I couldn't understand it, at least it was fun to watch.

"Skip these boring subjective assumptions." Yukino Yukinoshita crossed her arms in front of her chest. "Go straight to your sophistry. This is your final chance."

Did that pose help with thinking?

Yui Yuigahama tried crossing her arms like Yukino Yukinoshita, only to find that the fullness in front of her chest got somewhat in the way.

How strange.

Yukinon clearly made it look so easy.

Yui Yuigahama could only adjust the position of her arms slightly downward.

That worked.

When Yui Yuigahama looked up at Yukino Yukinoshita, she found that Yukino had lowered her hand again.

Yui Yuigahama: "?"

"Twisting logic? No, no, no. I just discovered something very interesting." The smile on Dong Yunshan's face grew even more obvious. "When you thought of this method of correction, did you really not notice it? The trap hidden inside it... the trap you set for yourself."

That gloating expression... For some reason, unease stirred in Yukino Yukinoshita's heart.

"The moment you came up with this method to correct an adult, you had already placed yourself in the position of a child." Dong Yunshan bent slightly and leaned closer to Yukino Yukinoshita's stiff face. "The premise for this correction method to be correct is that I am indeed treating you like a child, and that you accept being treated that way. Little Miss Yukinoshita, how does it feel... being spoiled by an adult?"

Yukino Yukinoshita's pupils abruptly contracted.

The problem Dong Yunshan had needed to face just now became, in an instant, the problem she needed to face.

She had to see herself as a child and regard Dong Yunshan as an adult for her correction method to be correct.

But if she did not see herself as a child, nor regard Dong Yunshan as an adult, then her correction method was wrong.

Either she admitted that she was a child, or she admitted that she was wrong.

This was the greatest flaw in the correction method she had tailor-made for Dong Yunshan.

"Originally, there was nothing wrong with this method. As long as I got angry and lost my temper, you won." Dong Yunshan pointed at Yoshiteru Zaimokuza. "But a little hiccup appeared, letting me discover your plan before I lost my adult composure."

"Huh?" Yoshiteru Zaimokuza used Splash once. "I still have a role?"

"It's not over yet..." Yukino Yukinoshita clenched her small fists. "Don't think you've won just because of that."

"True. As long as you don't admit it and I don't admit it either, the winner still hasn't been decided." Dong Yunshan sat back down in his chair. "The only thing that can decide the winner now is Zaimokuza's request."

"Huh?" Yoshiteru Zaimokuza pushed up his glasses. "I really do have a role?"

Yukino Yukinoshita also sat back down in her chair. "You will reveal the result."

"That's right!" Yui Yuigahama sat down as well. "You will reveal the result... reveal what?"