My Online Friend Can't Be This Cute

"Alright, don't worry about it." Mo Xiangwen smiled. "If I really need anything, I'll ask the family."

"Oh, right, one more thing."

"Mhm, go ahead."

His dad on the other end of the call seemed to hesitate, but with his mom urging him in the background, he finally said it.

"Remember to find yourself a girlfriend in college, or I won't be able to hold my head up around the relatives."

Well damn, so this was what the two of them had really called about tonight, huh?

"Hey, Dad, tell Mom for me that students should prioritize their studies. Isn't that what you used to tell me?"

"Your mom says she doesn't want to reason with you. Your wings have grown in, and she can't argue with you anymore. Just remember to find a girlfriend and bring her home."

"Oh, and your mom also complained that you never reply to the messages she sends you on Weixin. Remember to reply to her later."

Before he could say anything, the call was simply hung up.

What did they mean, find a girlfriend and bring her home? Was getting a girlfriend really that easy?

If he was bringing her home already, how far would the relationship have progressed? Did they think things were still like before?

As for Weixin, though, that was true. He hated how it drained his battery, so he had directly killed it in the background.

Back when he was working every day, he had kept it on standby twenty-four hours a day until he was numb. He really couldn't bring himself to like the app.

Anyway, he wasn't a corporate slave anymore. It was fine if he didn't use Weixin, right?

Still, he had forgotten that his parents would send him Weixin messages. He hadn't expected the two of them to learn how to use these things too.

He might as well reply to them now.

After Mo Xiangwen opened Weixin and replied to his parents, he discovered that besides their messages, there was another red notification waiting for his response.

It was a message from an account with an adorable white lion cub avatar.

He only had three Weixin friends in total, including his parents. Naturally, this person was Yan Nuoya, whom he had added at the scenic area so they could split the meal bill.

That was strange. What could Yan Nuoya possibly want from him?

The preview only showed an emoji. He would have to tap in and see.

There were four messages in total: two from yesterday and two from today, all sent in the afternoon.

Yesterday's messages and today's were almost exactly identical. The top one said, "Want to eat together?" and the bottom one was a Kitty emoji.

Well, if there was any difference, it was that today's Kitty emoji looked a little less happy than yesterday's.

...Yan Nuoya had said she had plans with a friend today. She probably hadn't meant him, right?

Logically speaking, he hadn't even seen the message or agreed to it, so it probably didn't count as having made plans.

...Forget it. He would apologize first for not seeing the messages. Whether she had meant to invite him could wait.

Mo Xiangwen sighed softly to himself. Just as he was wondering how to explain things, he turned around and found Zhong Taihong and Xi Shaojie glaring at him.

"What are those two up to now?" Mo Xiangwen looked at them in confusion, then asked Qin Yongfeng, the only normal one left.

Qin Yongfeng gave the two of them a speechless look. "Didn't we just mention couples having long phone calls? They think you were having a long phone call with your girlfriend."

"You two are seriously something else. Am I really that suspicious?" Mo Xiangwen glanced at them helplessly and sighed.

"You are pretty suspicious. Who told you to secretly have dinner with two beautiful girls tonight?" Xi Shaojie said honestly.

"Now that Old Zhong is done explaining himself, you have time to come after me?"

"Not yet, but Old Zhong said that with a great enemy before us, we should call a temporary truce."

"The hell do you mean, a great enemy before us? Old Zhong, what are you thinking?" Mo Xiangwen looked at the other man.

"Well, just like how you went out to eat with beautiful girls, I can't help feeling you're suspicious." Zhong Taihong sighed.

Mo Xiangwen paused, then stressed, "I told you, they're friends."

"Hehe."

"Hehe."

Alright, these two clearly didn't believe him at all.

"Then how about a bet? I haven't had time to change the contact name yet, have I?"

When he heard there was going to be a bet, Xi Shaojie looked hesitant.

"He's bluffing you." Zhong Taihong quickly patted Xi Shaojie, then asked, "What are we betting on?"

"If I really was just on the phone with my family, then this week's and next week's takeout..." Mo Xiangwen said meaningfully.

"I'll cover it." Zhong Taihong patted his chest. "But if you were chatting with a girl..."

"Then I'll cover it." Mo Xiangwen chuckled.

"Fine."

"As for Old Xi, if the takeout lottery lands on me and I have to go downstairs to pick it up during these two weeks, you'll get it for me. How about that?"

Xi Shaojie hesitated, just about to refuse when Zhong Taihong smacked him again.

"Fine, if we lose, you'll get it."

Seeing that they had both taken the bait, Mo Xiangwen opened his call log. The most recent entry clearly read, "Dad."

Not only that, but the entries before it were either Dad or Mom.

Zhong Taihong and Xi Shaojie looked at each other, unable to say anything.

"Do you admit it now?"

"I admit it. Damn it, Old Zhong, I'm going to fight you."

"Don't, bro. Bro, I was wrong."

Mo Xiangwen felt inexplicably guilty, but he still forced himself to remain calm. He shook his head, put on a show of letting out a heavy sigh, then passed between them and returned to his seat.

After thinking for a long time, he finally typed out a line on his phone and sent it.

"Sorry, I didn't see it."

Almost immediately, a reply came back.

"It's okay. Let's eat together next time."

PS: This was a combined chapter, nothing was cut. I rested. I'm not the protagonist—I don't have cheats. When it's time to lie down, I lie down. Hehe.

I'm Not the Cao Thief

"Hurry up. Today's our first time gathering as an entire class. It'll be awkward if everyone gets there and has to wait for just us," Qin Yongfeng urged.

"Then tell them that. Haven't I already come out?" Mo Xiangwen sighed. "Besides, there's still nearly half an hour. No need to rush."

"It'll take quite a while to walk there, and since it's the first time, everyone might arrive early." Qin Yongfeng shook his head.

Fine, Qin Yongfeng had a point.

It was just that Mo Xiangwen had gotten used to slacking off back when he was a corporate slave. Unless the deadline was right in front of him, he absolutely refused to move.

After all, everyone knew that work would not decrease just because you did it quickly and well.

On the contrary, there would only be more and more work.

It sounded contrary to common sense, but it fit human nature perfectly.

By the time you realized something was wrong, all the work had already piled up on you.

And raises were just lies told by bosses.

Over time, that had nurtured his procrastination and habit of slacking off.

"We're coming, we're coming," a voice called from the bathroom.

Zhong Taihong and Xi Shaojie walked out one after the other.

Zhong Taihong had clearly taken a shower, and his hair was still damp. Mo Xiangwen had no idea whether he had used hair gel or perfume, but the guy looked remarkably presentable.

Xi Shaojie, meanwhile, looked bleary-eyed, squinting as he yawned behind Zhong Taihong.

"Old Zhong, what are you doing? Going to a mixer?" Qin Yongfeng mocked. "Why are you dressing up so flashy just to attend a meeting? I thought you had spent so long in there because you fell into the toilet."

"Old Qin, you're a little aggressive today." Zhong Taihong stared at Qin Yongfeng in shock. "Did you eat gunpowder for breakfast?"

"Who told you that Old Qin had been urging you two for so long before you finally came out?" Mo Xiangwen sighed. "Old Qin and I have been waiting outside for more than ten minutes."

"Come on, it's our first time meeting our classmates and the teaching assistant senior. We have to prepare properly." Zhong Taihong patted his shoulder. "Especially since I heard there's a really pretty girl in our class. I have to make a good impression on her."

"Where did you get that gossip? What pretty girls could there be in Computer Science?" Xi Shaojie forcefully shoved Zhong Taihong's back. "And a teaching assistant senior? I think you've gone too long without satisfying your physical needs. Hurry up and move, don't block the way."

"I think you guys are seriously repressed. Every three sentences, you bring up girls." Mo Xiangwen urged, "Let's go, let's go. If we don't leave now, we really will be late."

"Old Zhong's brain is waterlogged. It's useless now." Qin Yongfeng shook his head. "He even mentioned the pretty classmate and the teaching assistant senior."

"Damn, I just casually mentioned the teaching assistant, but the pretty classmate is real." Zhong Taihong laughed and cursed. "Unfortunately, she already has a boyfriend. She came to register with him on freshman orientation day."

"They're a perfect match, and the whole major has been talking about them."

Mo Xiangwen blinked. What Zhong Taihong described sounded strangely familiar.

Could they be talking about Yan Nuoya?

If nothing unexpected had happened, they probably were.

Otherwise, it was hard to imagine that anyone in Computer Science, a major with such a severely unbalanced gender ratio, could casually be compared with Yan Nuoya in looks.

At Yan Nuoya's level, the only people he had seen who could compare were the Su Mengli sisters.

The three chatted as they walked. The moment they stepped out of the dormitory building, the August sun beat down on them with a scorching heat.

"Come to think of it, after orientation education ends, it'll be military training, right?"

Mo Xiangwen raised a hand to shield his eyes from the glaring sunlight and narrowed them slightly.

"Military training in this damn weather would be deadly."

Zhong Taihong froze. "Damn, I completely forgot college freshmen had to do military training."

"Well, you're like a monkey in heat right now. All you can think about is girls." Xi Shaojie laughed at him. "No wonder you're so bad at games."

"What the hell do you know? If college students don't date, it'll be even harder once they enter society." Zhong Taihong sneered. "At least in college, there are still a few silly girls who will genuinely date you for feelings. Once you're out in society, it's all just exchanges of interests."

Mo Xiangwen looked at him in shock. He hadn't expected this guy to be so terrifyingly insightful, grasping that truth so early.

"Old Zhong, who told you that? It doesn't sound like something you'd say." Mo Xiangwen asked curiously.

It was normal for college students to have romance on their minds. They were in the prime of youth, after all; they were bound to be restless.

But using those words as the basis for pursuing a relationship showed remarkable foresight... though it was still limited by the belief that one had to find a girlfriend and get married. Still, having that awareness was better than not having it.

"Damn, Old Mo, why are you just like those two? Why are you so aggressive today?"

"Am I? Maybe you're imagining it. If you really insist that I am, shouldn't you reflect on your own problems?"

"So it's my fault after all?" Zhong Taihong sighed blankly. "But no, I didn't come up with it. My cousin told me."

"Your cousin is someone who's been through it too." Mo Xiangwen sighed as well and patted his shoulder. "So what's his situation now?"

"His family's seven aunts and eight great-aunts are surrounding him and pressuring him to get married." Zhong Taihong shook his head. "He looks alright, and his family isn't short on money. Logically, he shouldn't still be unmarried when he's nearly thirty. He's already the latest among his generation, and everyone is anxious for him."

"But he says some things aren't about money or not. Precisely because it's such an important matter, he can't afford to settle even a little."

"Damn, why make it sound so cool? Isn't he still single this long because he couldn't find anyone in college?" Xi Shaojie mocked.

"Damn, you really ruin the mood. Even if that's true, my cousin still makes sense, right?" Zhong Taihong gave his cousin no face at all.

"That does make sense." Xi Shaojie nodded.

"Right? That's why I'm in such a hurry to find a girlfriend in college." Zhong Taihong glanced at the two silent men. "What about you two, Old Mo and Old Qin?"

Mo Xiangwen shrugged. "I don't have that intention for now. I'm not in a hurry."

If he couldn't find someone suitable, then he just wouldn't date.

There was no need to stubbornly trap himself from both ends.

Playing games with his online friends was also a form of spiritual entertainment. It wasn't like he absolutely had to have a girlfriend.

Qin Yongfeng also shook his head. "I'm not interested for now. I'd rather study hard and make money."