Secrets / Who Would Love a Monster

Noah was so terrified he wanted to scream.

But it was as if an invisible hand had seized his throat, and he could not make a sound.

He had been wrong. He never should have gotten close to Ning Zhao.

The flawless Crown Prince everyone saw was a devil!

Shi Sheng's heart pounded violently. A voice in his subconscious told him to leave.

Perhaps if he pushed open this door, the life he was currently content with would be shattered.

But another voice told him Elaine had to be inside.

That was Elaine...

Shi Sheng let out a long breath and reached out his hand.

The moment he pushed open the door, a powerful scent of pheromones rushed at him.

It was a scent Shi Sheng knew better than anything.

Yet Elaine was nowhere to be seen in the empty room before him.

Moonlight spilled across half the room, casting White Phoenix's long tail feathers in pure, dazzling light.

Shi Sheng had seen that White Phoenix before.

The beautiful white divine bird lay on the soft carpet, its golden eyes half-open.

For a moment, Shi Sheng wondered if he was dreaming.

Before, he had thought it was a pet Elaine kept. But at this moment, Shi Sheng felt that he might have been wrong.

Amid the familiar pheromones filling the room, a strange suspicion arose in Shi Sheng's heart.

Lindsay found Yumian and carefully examined him again.

"I'm fine." Yumian pushed Lindsay's hand away, sounding tired. "How's Big Brother?"

"Not good." Lindsay looked troubled as well. "He probably won't be able to change back anytime soon, and he might..."

Yumian calmly said, "He might lose his human consciousness, like I did when I was little, right?"

Lindsay sighed. "That's the worse possibility. Don't worry too much. The head of the family is in good physical condition. At worst, he'll recover in a few days."

The two brothers sat silently in the night.

After a long while, Yumian asked, "Do you think Shi Sheng will still like Big Brother if he sees him like this?"

"I don't know," Lindsay said.

"Who would like a monster?" Yumian sneered, as though something had come to mind.

"Most people in this world can't even accept the flaws of ordinary people, much less a curse."

"Yumian." Lindsay seemed about to say something, but in the end, he merely pressed a hand to Yumian's shoulder. "It'll be okay."

Yumian turned his head. "Are you comforting me, or yourself?"

"Brother, I've always found it strange. Your salary at the research institute is enough to support yourself, so why don't you leave Carlos?"

"Mother has been gone for a long time, and you don't need to repay any debt of gratitude."

"What good is there in staying in this family?"

Lindsay did not answer.

He merely patted Yumian's head, like any ordinary older brother in the world.

"It'll be okay, Yumian."

Moonlight dyed White Phoenix's wings a sacred silver.

Shi Sheng carefully walked over, barely daring to breathe.

But White Phoenix still sharply caught the sound of his footsteps and suddenly spread its wings.

A gust of wind blew open the window, and the stained glass gave off a faint cracking sound.

In that instant, without even thinking, Shi Sheng rushed into the room. Driven almost entirely by instinct, he lunged forward and wrapped his arms around White Phoenix's wings.

Elaine!

Shi Sheng cried out desperately in his heart. It felt as though his heart had been sliced by countless blades, then tossed into saltwater.

Without caring about anything else, he used both hands and feet to cling to White Phoenix's beautiful, enormous body.

The violent wind made it impossible for Shi Sheng to open his eyes, but he did not loosen his grip in the slightest.

Elaine...

White Phoenix slowly stopped spreading its wings.

He heard Shi Sheng's sobbing in his heart.

Seeing that White Phoenix had stopped moving, Shi Sheng hurriedly wrapped his arms around its long neck.

This familiar scent was unmistakably Elaine's.

A hoarse sob escaped Shi Sheng's throat, and his tears fell into White Phoenix's soft feathers.

He did not know why he was crying, or why he felt so sad.

He was only afraid Elaine would truly fly away, so he hugged White Phoenix and did not dare move at all.

After a long time, he seemed to feel White Phoenix sigh. Warm feathers gently covered him.

Shi Sheng looked up and met White Phoenix's golden eyes.

He cautiously looked at Elaine, then at the open window.

Then he carefully released him and dashed to the window at the fastest speed of his life, closing it and even seriously locking it.

He turned around and earnestly signed, "I know you're Elaine, aren't you?"

White Phoenix did not answer.

Shi Sheng gestured again. "You have Elaine's pheromones. I know them very well. I won't mistake you."

"Don't pretend you don't understand. I know you do."

White Phoenix sighed again like a human, then slowly nodded.

Shi Sheng finally smiled. He wiped away his tears with the back of his hand and ran back to Elaine's side.

He knelt beside Elaine's wing and vigorously gestured, "Elaine is amazing. You can even transform."

A trace of surprise flashed through those golden eyes, followed by a very complicated expression.

Shi Sheng pretended not to see it. He sat beside Elaine for a while before carefully asking in sign language.

"Then... can you change back?"

He gave Elaine an obedient smile. "You're beautiful like this too, but I want to talk to Elaine."

Elaine did not answer. Thinking the signs were too complicated for him to understand, Shi Sheng used his voice device to ask again.

After a long silence, Elaine shook his head.

Shi Sheng's eyes began to ache. He blinked several times uncontrollably, only to realize tears had fallen again.

An unfamiliar emotion surged up in his heart. The more he thought about it, the sadder he became, and he could not stop his tears.

A pained emotion flashed through Elaine's golden eyes. But he had no hands to wipe Shi Sheng's tears, so he could only raise his wings and shelter the Omega beneath them.

Shi Sheng sniffled a few times and tried hard to wipe away his tears. He poked his head out from beneath the wings, forcing a smile onto his face.

"I'm not afraid," he slowly signed. "And I don't dislike Elaine. I just..."

He froze for a moment and sniffed.

"Does it hurt for Elaine to be like this?"

Only then did Shi Sheng realize that this unfamiliar emotion was heartache.

He ached for Elaine, the powerful but gentle Alpha whom he had always thought could do anything.

When no one knew, Elaine would uncontrollably turn into another form, and he had even avoided Shi Sheng because he was afraid Shi Sheng would see him.

Shi Sheng felt so heartbroken he could barely breathe.

He hugged Elaine tightly, wanting him to understand his feelings.

Elaine could not speak, so he could only cover Shi Sheng with his wings again.

Even in this form, he was still as gentle with Shi Sheng as ever.

Shi Sheng buried his face in the soft feathers and gently rubbed against them.

Before today, even though he had liked Elaine so much, he had still felt that Elaine was very far away.

At this moment, he instead felt closer to Elaine than ever.

It was okay, he thought.

He had spent such a long time getting to Elaine's side. How could he possibly care what form Elaine took?

Shi Sheng had a long dream. When he woke again, he found himself lying in his original bedroom.

The instant he opened his eyes, he could not tell reality from dream.

He only knew that he was alone in the huge bedroom, and Elaine was nowhere to be found.

Shi Sheng hurriedly got out of bed. Just as he ran to the door, someone pushed it open from outside.

Before his eyes could light up, they dimmed again—it was Yumian.

Yumian looked no different from usual. He looked at Shi Sheng in surprise. "What are you doing? You aren't even wearing shoes."

Shi Sheng ran back for his voice device. "Where's Elaine?"

"Oh, there's something going on at the military headquarters. He left for two days." Yumian spoke as if nothing had happened. "Are you going to breakfast? I'm starving."

Shi Sheng quietly looked at Yumian.

Normally, Yumian would not specifically come to the bedroom he shared with Elaine just to call him to breakfast.

Yumian grew uneasy under Shi Sheng's stare and rubbed his hair. "Ah, I just came to check on you. So much happened yesterday. I wanted to see if anything was wrong with you."

Shi Sheng decided to be direct. He used his voice device to describe how Elaine had turned into White Phoenix and asked whether Yumian knew about it.

Yumian's gaze drifted to the side. "What nonsense are you talking about? You must've dreamed it."

"Big Brother took you back yesterday, then the military headquarters called him away right after that."

Shi Sheng only kept staring at Yumian.

Yumian's eyes shifted from left to right.

Seeing that Yumian had no intention of telling the truth, Shi Sheng reached out, pulled up a recording from his wristband, and held it in front of Yumian.

Yumian's expression changed. Just as he was about to speak, Shi Sheng pressed his voice device again.

"Yesterday, I, recorded, everything."

"It, was, not, a, dream."

"How, is, Elaine?"

Yumian opened his mouth, but in the end, he surrendered under Shi Sheng's gaze.

"If you want to ask so many questions, you should eat first. I won't have the energy to answer you if I don't eat."

Yumian's first transformation in his memories happened when he was ten years old.

It was the first year after his mother's death. No one would hold him when the full moon came, when his entire body felt awful, and coax him to sleep anymore.

That was also the year when Yumian discovered he had grown sharp teeth and claws. He had been so frightened that he burst into loud tears.

The entire Carlos household was roused by him. It had been a chaotic night.

But when he woke the next day, he found that many servants had disappeared.

That day, he met his eldest brother, who had already become the head of the family.

Elaine was very busy. At eighteen, he was at the age of entering the reserve forces of military academy.

Yet he still came to see Yumian and told his younger brother how to accept this terrifying curse.

Only then did Yumian learn that the rumor he had vaguely heard since childhood was true.

They—the entire Carlos family—had truly been cursed by the goddess.

Yumian had always known that he was not a likable child.

Since childhood, he had seemed to have less of the so-called empathy than others. Sometimes, when servants were punished and cried before him for mercy, he only found them noisy.

Many times, he could not feel pain either. He did not think bleeding or being injured was particularly frightening.

His temper was also worse than that of ordinary children.

He remembered that when he was even younger, his mother had tried to teach him to become a kind and sensitive person, only to give up again and again in despair.

Even when his mother died, he had not become a normal child.

So this was the curse.

His two brothers had received the same curse. It seemed that terrible spell had been branded into their blood.

At first, Yumian had comforted himself. Being able to turn into a beast was so cool. He could have strength, speed, and freedom humans did not possess.

But the truth was that they could not completely control these transformations.

Most of the time, he could not put away his sharp fangs.

There was not even any pattern to it. Sometimes, a slightly stronger emotional fluctuation would cause problems.

And occasionally, after transforming, he had no human consciousness at all.

Yumian had once broken down like his mother, but there was no way to ease his breakdown. He could only become an arrogant young master.

Elaine had told him to accept his flaws.

And as a member of the Carlos family, he had to grow stronger and turn those flaws into weapons.

Yumian obediently accepted it and considered himself a terrifying monster.

Gradually, he felt it was not such a big deal. Look at his eldest brother—he could still become a marshal, still become the undefeated God of War of the entire Empire.

But he would never forget that even if they could accept themselves,

most people in the world only saw Carlos as a family of slaughter.

Shi Sheng was immersed in prolonged shock.

He had never taken the rumors about Carlos seriously before.

So the curse was real. Elaine wasn't the only one suffering like this.

After a long while, he finally asked, "So Elaine can't turn back?"

"He can, but he's lost his human consciousness now," Yumian said. "It happened last night, after you came."

The voice device slipped from Shi Sheng's hand and hit the floor.

Yumian hurriedly said, "That's normal too. It's happened before. He'll be fine in two or three days."

But Shi Sheng didn't believe him.

How could that be normal? With something this strange, who could guarantee what might happen the next second?

Yumian was the youngest brother. When he was little, he could still cry and show his fear. Even after beastification, he still had two older brothers to teach him from experience.

But what about Elaine? Elaine was the older brother. When he was young, did anyone comfort him?

Was Elaine supposed to be powerful from birth, strong from birth? Before becoming the steady, reliable older brother Shi Sheng remembered from the battlefield, had anyone protected him?

Shi Sheng stood there in a daze for a while before bending down to pick up the voice device again. "Where is Elaine?"

Yumian fell silent, but he couldn't withstand Shi Sheng's repeated questioning. "At the research institute. Lindsay is watching him."

Shi Sheng quieted down.

"...Aren't you afraid?" Yumian finally couldn't help asking. "Of something this strange?"

Shi Sheng shook his head.

Yumian's tone turned strange. "You don't actually like my eldest brother, do you?"

Shi Sheng glanced at him. "Can't I?"

"You should give up as soon as possible." Yumian leaned back, resting his head against the back of the couch, his gaze drifting somewhere unknown.

"You'll have a short life if you're with Carlos's Alpha."

Shi Sheng frowned and looked at him disapprovingly.

But Yumian didn't continue. He seemed to have thought of something.

Only after a long time did he say, "What do you even like about my eldest brother? I really can't understand it. He's so cold and hard, and people outside say he kills at the drop of a hat, don't they?"

"And those Omegas who like Izel must be blind."

"You probably don't know my second brother either. All that gentleness and affection of his is an act. In reality, he's unbelievably awful."

"When I was little, I fell into the water and thrashed around for ages. He just stood on the shore and watched. He could swim, but he wouldn't come save me."

"Merico was the one who pulled me out afterward."

"Do you know what he said to Merico then? He was actually shocked that I might drown, because he could swim himself and couldn't understand how someone could drown."

"He's a complete freak."

"If those Omegas knew Izel's mind wasn't normal, they'd probably flee on rockets."

"The person he's been searching for all this time probably ran away after seeing his true colors."

As Yumian spoke, his eyes grew increasingly cold and distant.

A warm force settled over the back of his hand.

He froze, then saw Shi Sheng holding his hand and gently patting it.

Yumian felt a little awkward. "What are you doing?"

Shi Sheng lowered his head and pressed the voice device. "When you really like someone, you won't be afraid."

After thinking for a moment, he put down the voice device and made a gesture.

Then he picked it up again. "This gesture means me."

He continued gesturing, picking up the voice device after each motion to tell Yumian what it meant.

At last, he repeated it seriously, joining the gestures into a complete sentence.

Shi Sheng said it meant, "My heart is eternal."

"Yumian." Shi Sheng carefully formed Yumian's name with his lips.

"Someone who likes you will like every version of you."

Yumian stared at Shi Sheng blankly.

There was a soft smile in Shi Sheng's eyes. In that moment, he seemed like a real older brother.

He leaned forward and hugged Yumian.

Yumian felt him slowly write three words across his back.

"You've had it hard."

Yumian felt something strange in his eyes, a sour ache.

Before he could make sense of it, Shi Sheng had already let him go.

"So now, can I go see Elaine?"