How should I put this? Something from the past suddenly came to mind and made my heart ache. How should I say it? It was like the gut-wrenching pain of a breakup. But I hadn't actually gone through a breakup. My chest felt painfully tight. I wrote a little over a hundred words, then my mind went completely blank.
Even this brief explanation I was typing now had taken me ages to think through. I had to think for a long time just to write a single sentence, and I didn't even feel like reading it over once.
It felt like an excuse that sounded like a lie, but I really didn't know how to explain it. In any case, there was nothing I could do. I was already prepared to be criticized... to be judged as committing some kind of terrible behavior I didn't know how to describe. When the words reached my lips, I had no idea what to say. I didn't know what was wrong with me either. Anyway, I was sorry.
I didn't know what to say again. Forgetting what I wanted to say just a second ago—there was really no one else like me.
Once my thoughts recovered tomorrow and I updated, I'd explain what I wanted to say now! I really didn't know what to say.