Chapter 19

[Yangzi Fried Rice: Boss, huge progress! Your big brother messaged me and told me to go to his office after work today.]

[Yangzi Fried Rice: He's asking me out alone to add scenes, huh? Can I count it as overtime pay?]

Shi Jihan, upon receiving the message: ?!

"What are you muttering about? I can't hear you." He automatically filtered out the glaring words "overtime pay," his gaze landing on "asking me out alone" and "find him after work." "Oh my god, it actually worked?"

No, Big Brother, how did you really fail to hold yourself back?

Zero-Zero-Zero wept with joy: [Host, you really are the best! Even our rumor-based romance got the plot back on track. As expected of an all-powerful host!]

[ Ding. Task issued: Have Shen Qinghuai catch his husband meeting privately with his White Moonlight late at night. Reward: Malice Points +30. ]

30!!!

A fortune!!!

Shi Jihan hurriedly contacted Shen Qinghuai, who had gone on a business trip to a branch office today, bombarding him with calls: "Brother Huai, get here now!"

By the time Shen Qinghuai hurried back from another city, it was already after work. It was Friday, and the company employees had cleared out completely. There were barely any people working overtime. Standing in the empty company lobby, he asked, "What happened?"

Shi Jihan grabbed him and urged him repeatedly, "Come with me first. You'll know when we get there."

He dragged Shen Qinghuai into the elevator and, following Zero-Zero-Zero's instructions, pressed the floor number. On the way straight to the president's office, he fiercely condemned, "Let me tell you, this is truly a decline in public morals, corruption of the human heart, moral decay, and utter filth!"

Seeing how angry he was, Shen Qinghuai vaguely sensed something was wrong and became slightly flustered.

When Shi Jihan shoved open the office door with a bang and Shen Qinghuai saw the two heads pressed together, his breathing stopped.

The hand hanging at his side clenched into a tight fist, his nails digging into his flesh.

Maintaining his last shred of composure and dignity, he asked in a trembling voice, "What... are you doing?"

"Huh?"

The two heads turned around in unison.

Revealing the Bilibili video on the computer screen.

[An uploader teaches you how to master the VLOOKUP Function in ten minutes and say goodbye to being a workplace newbie!]

Shi Bochuan tentatively said, "Helping, helping our company employees train their workplace skills?"

Otherwise, why would someone who could not even set up ten-thousand-unit display, OCR text recognition, animation duplication, and other functions write "proficient in WPS and various other software" on his résumé?

Chapter 19

The moment Zhou Zeyang saw Shi Jihan, it was like seeing his own father. Tears streamed from his eyes like egg drop soup, and he was just short of throwing himself at him.

Help, why did he really come to work overtime?!

Shen Qinghuai's expression gradually shifted from anger and grief to astonishment.

[ Ding. Task "catching his husband meeting privately with his White Moonlight late at night" completed. Reward: Malice Points +30. ]

Shi Bochuan even waved the two newcomers over to look at the Bilibili watch history. From Excel multidimensional tables to PowerPoint motion paths, it covered everything imaginable.

It made Shi Jihan go limp.

No worldly desires, quietly waiting for flowers to bloom.jpg

He turned to look at Shen Qinghuai's expression, only to discover that Shen Qinghuai had actually started scrolling with great interest, wanting to examine the process of making motion paths in detail. "How do you make this? It's amazing."

"..."

So this was what qualified workhorses were like.

So thoroughly marinated that if they were made into beef and mutton skewers, they would definitely taste like cumin and chili.

Shi Bochuan spoke eloquently. "I noticed long ago that Xiaoyang's behavior these past few days was off. Sure enough, it was exactly as I thought."

Shi Jihan forced himself to perk up, waiting to hear what nonsense he could still come up with. "How so?"

Shi Bochuan said, "I tested him just now. Xiaoyang has a real talent for marketing. With proper training, he'll definitely be an asset to the company. But someone like him was unknown, a minor employee pushed to the edge of the company. He had ambition but no chance to rise, so he took an unconventional approach and decided to make his presence known in front of us, hoping to fight for a future."

He summed it up with heartfelt sincerity. "Inspiring."

That single statement directly silenced both Shi Jihan and Zero-Zero-Zero.

The air congealed into frozen tofu. Silence. Deathly silence.

With the plot derailed like this and the White Moonlight instantly becoming an ambitious company employee, Zero-Zero-Zero seemed to see the disciplinary notices the Main System would slap down when it returned to the Unified Realm to report in.

It did not understand. It had clearly completed every task properly, so how had the plot gone off course?

It felt wronged on behalf of its host. QAQ

Zhou Zeyang broke the silence with a cat-paw-pointing emoji expression. "Huh? Me?"

"Makes sense." Shen Qinghuai nodded, thoroughly agreeing with Shi Bochuan's guess. "Everything suddenly makes sense."

Then he said to Zhou Zeyang, "Of course it's you. A-Chuan is very accurate when judging people. If he says you have talent, then you definitely do. How about this? Isn't Xiaohan's new clothing line about to be promoted? The two of you can work together."

Shi Jihan shouted repeatedly, "No, you guys—" Listen to me!

Zhou Zeyang darted forward and covered his mouth, his eyes shining like searchlights. "Then do I get paid? Paid normally, not docked until I'm left with just one coin?" he asked shyly.

Shi Jihan rolled his eyes hard. "Mm! Mmm-mmm-mmm!"

How dare you!!

Shi Bochuan was angry. "Who would dock your wages for no reason? Isn't that workplace bullying? That's simply immoral and disgraceful. Don't worry. Work with us from now on, and no one will dare treat you like that. If you do well, you'll even get bonuses and commissions. Company shares aren't out of the question either."

"President Shi!" Zhou Zeyang immediately leaned in to kiss him. "Let's watch some more useful material. I'm overflowing with motivation to work overtime now!"

[I'm overflowing with motivation to die right now!] Shi Jihan let out a soul-deep howl at Zero-Zero-Zero. [Is there something wrong with your task evaluation standards? Did the system get a virus? Otherwise, how could the plot possibly veer this far off course!]

Zero-Zero-Zero felt wronged. [I'm Higher-Dimensional Machine Intelligence. How could I possibly malfunction?]

Shi Jihan was certain beyond doubt. [It's absolutely your problem. I'm sending you back for repairs right now.]

His motto was simple: when in doubt, never internally spiral. Never ask why he was at fault; only ask why others were.

Though Zero-Zero-Zero was heartbroken at being misunderstood, it still tried hard to comfort its host. [It's okay. It hasn't completely collapsed yet. As long as those two don't bring the century wedding of the HE ending forward to now and butterfly away the three hundred thousand words of chasing his wife through the crematorium in the middle, we can still be saved.]

Shi Jihan regained the strength to make money. [Okay, then what should we do now?]

Zero-Zero-Zero: [...]

Zero-Zero-Zero: [Go collect the Main System's administrative penalty notice.]

Shi Jihan: .

After returning home, he sorrowfully ordered seven or eight deliveries. Without even using an Expanding God Coupon, he decided, in the fury of someone who had given up on life, to drown himself in mala tang.

He was certainly good at picking ways to die.

After the two-day weekend, he had nearly talked himself back into feeling better. He thought it was fine—when one side did not shine, another would; the coffin lid was honestly pretty bright.

Then Monday came, and he saw Zhou Zeyang at the workstation across from his.

Shi Jihan: Not hehe.

Still brimming with enthusiasm that had not yet been marinated by the Monday morning grind, Zhou Zeyang greeted him, "Good morning, Xiaohan."

Shi Jihan fiercely condemned him. [Listen to that. He doesn't even call me boss anymore.]

Zero-Zero-Zero: [After all, the two of you now serve the same master.]

[If you don't know how to use idioms, shut up.]

Zhou Zeyang leaned over and said, "Brother Huai told me to come up with a promotional plan with you and to cooperate with you fully. Can I take a look at your new designs first?"

A month after Carbohydrate Rhapsody, the prolific Shi Jihan had once again brought a pile of trash to the fashion world.

The Going to Work Is Like Attending a Funeral collection.

He sent the fashion sketches to Zhou Zeyang.

In the first one, the model wore a burial-shroud suit printed with company slogans. "Wolf culture," "flexible working hours," and "flat management" bound him tightly. He carried a folding camp bed on his back and clutched a neck pillow printed with "Get Rich Soon." Dark circles ringed his vacant eyes as he stared at the camera.

In the second, an elaborate and heavy European-style layered ball gown was made from sheets of edible coloring paper stacked one atop another. Every sheet was covered with the empty promises drawn by the boss, crushing the model beneath them. It was truly the art of a paper dress made of empty promises.

The accessories included earrings made from toilet paper rolls labeled "Let Me Briefly Say a Few Words," and a five-meter-long speech manuscript full of nonsense—the boss's one-man carnival right before the end of the workday.

There were also trench coats with scrolling PowerPoint laser screens, dresses strung together from coffee capsules, and more. Even the accessories had been designed: Merit Fish-Drum Hats, "Read But No Reply" masks, tombstone briefcases, funeral-wreath headphones, and graveyard high heels.

Zhou Zeyang was astonished. "Don't you ever hit a creative bottleneck?"

"I used to," Shi Jihan said, slumped in his chair and staring gloomily at the ceiling. "Then I worked for a few months, and it disappeared."

Zhou Zeyang immediately felt a bond of mutual sympathy. Knowing that the president's younger brother suffered just as badly as he did put him at ease. "You already have a promotional plan, right? This time, we'll join forces and make President Shi's advertising budget more than worth it."

-

Shi Group's new collection soon hit the market again.

Zhou Jingcheng did not need to make a special effort to ask around. The news kept reaching his ears on its own. The people passing along the information kept giving him strange looks, but whenever Zhou Jingcheng questioned them, they laughed it off and refused to say why, wearing expressions that said, "You know."

I'll turn all you riddle-speakers into red bean paste. Zhou's Red Bean Buns smiled kindly.

That day, he finally found time amid his business war with Harlan and asked Secretary Sun what exactly was going on.

Secretary Sun showed him Shi Corporation's promotional campaign for the new collection. "It's a collaboration between Young Master Shi and the new hire. It trended again. Take a look."

Zhou Jingcheng randomly clicked a link. It was a co-branded advertisement for the clothing and a new-energy electric car.

Wait, with a new-energy electric car?

He clicked play. In the advertisement, the female lead lifted her skirt and sprinted through a subway station. Her life-saving battle gown made from coffee capsules clattered loudly, while the espresso concentrate hidden in her high heels seeped out with every step, becoming overtime fuel. "What do you do when your fuel is low and your power isn't enough?"

The female lead opened a capsule on the spot, poured it into her shoe, and shook it violently. Planting one foot on the ground, she lifted the shoe and recited the slogan: "DC fast charging, rapid energy replenishment, long-lasting range."