Broom Star's Work Troubles

Gong Kai moved much faster than Wen Ning had expected.

That evening, just as Wen Ning saw the last fox spirit who had come for a bath out the door,

his phone rang. Gong Kai had sent him a WeChat message containing only a string of numbers—Zhou Hu's birth date and time—followed by a voice message: "Wen, I'm counting on you. My friend's been tormented so badly he's thinking of becoming a monk. Please hurry."

Wen Ning quickly replied, "Got it."

He copied the birth details onto a sheet of paper, sat down in a chair, and stared at them.

He had no idea how to do this. Though his cultivation was now at the Earth Immortal level, as for using someone's birth details to check their fortune...

His godfather had never taught him, and there was no chapter on it in the Eight-Nine Mysteries incantation.

Still, it didn't matter that he couldn't read birth charts.

Wen Ning had his own ways. He might not know how, but he had connections in the Heavenly Court. Besides, with Zhou Hu having such terrible luck this month, he first had to rule out any factors originating there.

Zhou Hu's misfortune was remarkably regular and far-reaching, striking every aspect of his life, from travel to food to work, without leaving a single gap.

This systematic, persistent, all-encompassing pattern of bad luck

was something he had glimpsed in the Compendium of Human-World Anomalies Lu Ming had sent him.

At the time, Lu Ming had even highlighted one sentence with an exclamation mark:

"When large-scale, regular patterns of misfortune occur in the mortal world, ninety percent are related to Broom Star. Contact Broom Star himself immediately to verify!"

That gave him a lead: Broom Star, the deity in the Three Realms specifically responsible for misfortune. Making people unlucky was his job, and Zhou Hu's symptoms practically looked like a textbook example of his work.

Rather than make wild guesses, Wen Ning might as well ask the man himself.

If Broom Star really was behind it, and there was no serious issue involved, he could mediate. At worst, he could treat Broom Star to a meal and let the matter blow over.

Wen Ning was just about to ask for Broom Star's contact information in the Heavenly Court Work Group.

But then he remembered how, the last time he had asked about a Snail Maiden in the group, Lu Ming had flooded the chat with more than thirty messages.

In the end, his godfather had had to step in personally to bring the discussion to a close.

Besides, if he asked about this himself,

for one thing, Wen Ning didn't carry much weight.

For another, word getting out wouldn't do Broom Star's reputation any favors. A professional matter was best discussed privately.

With that in mind, Wen Ning took three incense sticks from the drawer, placed them neatly in the burner, and lit them. He stepped back twice, kowtowed three times, then looked up at Wen Zhong's statue.

"Godfather, could you help me get someone's contact information? Broom Star, the one who handles misfortune in the Heavenly Court. There's a mortal whose bad luck seems a little abnormal, and I'd like to ask whether he's been doing his job a little too well."

The incense smoke rose in a perfectly straight line.

Then the statue's eyes flashed.

A moment later, Wen Ning's phone screen lit up.

Wen Zhong had sent a message containing only a phone number: three zeros followed by seven digits. Beneath it was a brief instruction: "Call him directly. Don't ask in the group."

Wen Ning looked at the message and was about to dial.

Then Wen Zhong sent another message: "Tell Broom Star to mind his manners. He was muted for three days after arguing with someone in the group last time."

The Heavenly Court's group moderation is pretty strict, Wen Ning thought as he dialed the number.

The phone rang several times before the call connected.

A lazy voice came from the other end, amid a great deal of noise.

It sounded as though many people were talking, with the occasional slap of a hand against a table.

"Hello? Who's this? I'm busy. Make it quick."

Wen Ning recognized the sounds on the other end. Wasn't that a game of mahjong?

"Uh, hello. I'm Wen Ning, a Heavenly Official with the Thunder Department Celestial Registry. I'd like to consult you about something in the mortal world."

"Pong! Wait, I'm claiming that red dragon!"

Broom Star shouted on the other end before returning to the phone. His tone became slightly more serious, though it still carried a trace of impatience. "Thunder Department? Who are you? How did you get my number? I'm busy. Make an appointment first."

With that, he was about to hang up.

Wen Ning couldn't let the conversation end like that, so he hurriedly added,

"My godfather, Heavenly Venerable Wen, gave me your number."

Once he heard that, Broom Star hardly dared hang up so casually.

"Oh, oh! So you're one of Heavenly Venerable Wen's people in the Thunder Department! All top talent. We're colleagues, aren't we? No need to stand on ceremony. What's the matter?"

Wen Ning gathered his thoughts and explained Zhou Hu's situation.

Before he could finish, a sudden clatter of mahjong tiles came over the phone, followed by Broom Star's excited voice.

"Win off a kong! I'm out! All one suit, all triplets! Pay up, pay up, pay up!"

Wen Ning moved the phone a little farther from his ear. Once the other end finally quieted down, Broom Star spoke again. Clearly, he had won that hand.

"Sorry, young man. That was a huge hand. My luck's running hot. Go on. What did you say happened to that mortal? Instant noodles with no seasoning packet and no fork? Now that's interesting. Sounds a bit like my handiwork. But hold on, let me check the duty roster."

The sound of pages turning came over the phone. Broom Star leafed through them for quite a while, muttering to himself as he went.

"Nothing scheduled around the urban village this month. This wasn't me."

Still clinging to a shred of hope, Wen Ning asked,

"Could one of your interns or temporary workers have taken the wrong assignment?"

Broom Star's tone turned serious.

"Young man, even if Heavenly Venerable Wen is your godfather, you cannot question the professionalism of the Heavenly Court Misfortune Department. I can tell you unequivocally that every employee's duty roster is approved by the Three Realms Fate Management Committee.

"Every assignment is documented and carried out in accordance with regulations.

"Besides, I'm the only person in the Misfortune Department. Where would I get an intern? What respectable person would want to be Broom Star these days? The work offends people, the pay is lousy, and the year-end appraisal even depends on public satisfaction. What mortal would be satisfied with bad luck?"

As he spoke, a hint of self-mockery crept into his voice, but he soon returned to his earlier tone.

"Still, young man, I can help you analyze the situation. Misfortune in the mortal world only comes from a few sources: above, below, or in between. Above means me. Below means something's gone wrong with the ancestors. In between means something's gone wrong with the person himself."

Wen Ning quickly wrote that down. Since Broom Star wasn't behind this, the problem had to lie either with Zhou Hu's ancestors or with Zhou Hu himself.

Broom Star added one more thing over the phone.

"Oh, right, young man. You've broadened my experience. Instant noodles without a seasoning packet—I'll have to add that to the training materials."

Wen Ning thanked him and hung up. He still needed to find someone. He had turned to his godfather for the world above, but who could he ask about the world below?

Then it struck him: Meng Jiang, Lu Ming's mortal enemy. Wasn't she Meng Po's niece? Wouldn't this be exactly her area of expertise?

With that thought, Wen Ning wasted no time. He would find the cause tonight and solve the problem for Zhou Hu tomorrow.