What a Crime!

There was only one class that morning. Fortunately, the teacher hadn't taken attendance, which let Li Yichen breathe a sigh of relief.

On his way back to the dorm, he passed the noticeboard and found a crowd of students gathered around it, standing on tiptoe and craning their necks to see.

"Yes! I made it!" Just then, a chubby guy burst out of the crowd, waving his arms and shouting with excitement written all over his face.

Everyone else immediately shot him looks of envy, jealousy, and resentment.

"What are you staring at? Never seen a handsome guy before?" The guy raised his chin smugly, then muttered to himself as he walked away, "I'd better go back and spruce myself up so I can welcome my adorable freshman girls tomorrow."

"Shameless bastard. Scumbag. Animal..." Countless people flipped off his retreating back.

Only after Li Yichen squeezed into the crowd did he realize that the list of freshman welcome volunteers had been posted.

"Do they really need to get this excited? You'd think they'd passed the imperial exams." Li Yichen couldn't help shaking his head.

As expected, he found his own name and those of his roommates on the list.

After squeezing back out of the crowd, he couldn't help groaning to himself, "Why is my name on there? In this heat, too! What am I, some sucker they're trying to work to death? What a crime."

At once, he felt countless murderous gazes boring into his back. He hunched his shoulders and hurriedly fled.

He couldn't be sure these hormone-crazed guys wouldn't gang up on him. Although he wasn't afraid of them now, he couldn't exactly beat every last one of them into the ground, could he?

When he returned to the dorm, all three of his roommates were still asleep, each snoring louder than the next.

"Hey, wake up." Li Yichen gave the guys a few helpless pats.

"Quit it." They waved him off and rolled over without so much as lifting an eyelid.

"Earthquake!" Li Yichen had no choice but to shout at the top of his lungs.

"Pfffft..." His answer was an exceptionally long, exceptionally loud fart.

"Fuck." Li Yichen was furious. That saying really was true: you could never wake someone who was pretending to sleep.

Then Li Yichen held out his hands and activated his cultivation technique. A layer of frost immediately formed over both hands. "Heh heh... you asked for this. Don't blame me for playing rough."

With that, he planted both hands on Yang Weifeng's back.

"Aaargh!" Yang Weifeng sprang out of bed. "Holy shit, Number Four! What the hell's so cold?"

Li Yichen couldn't be bothered to answer him and turned his attention to Sun Kai and Zhang Yong.

Sure enough, the other two also leaped up, howling.

The three of them then glared at Li Yichen with bloodshot eyes, like three bulls in heat.

"Crack... crack." They cracked their knuckles, looking utterly menacing.

"Heh heh." Yang Weifeng gave a vicious grin. "Number Four, you brought this on yourself."

Then he beckoned to Sun Kai and Zhang Yong. "Number Two, Number Three, let's get him together. Strip this brat naked and put him on display."

"Stay back, or I'll call for help." Li Yichen backed away.

"Heh heh..." The other two put on affected voices. "Go ahead and scream. Nobody will come to save you, even if you scream yourself hoarse." As they spoke, the three slowly closed in on him.

"Stop! I actually woke you up because I've got good news. Do you want to hear it?" Li Yichen said hastily.

"Let's hear it." The three stopped as expected, and Zhang Yong threatened, "If it isn't good enough, you know what'll happen."

"I guarantee you'll be over the moon," Li Yichen hurriedly assured them.

"Then spit it out!" all three said in unison.

"Ahem." Li Yichen cleared his throat, then said, "Your names are on the list of volunteers welcoming the freshmen tomorrow."

"What?" All three shouted together, nearly deafening him.

He dug at his ear and said with a touch of disdain, "Didn't I tell you yesterday that I had a way? You didn't believe me."

"Really?" Yang Weifeng stared at Li Yichen in delighted surprise, looking as though he wanted to pounce on him and plant a kiss on him.

"Yep." Li Yichen nodded. "What would I gain by lying to you? Besides, the list's already posted. Go look for yourselves."

"Our names are on the list?" Sun Kai seemed to have only just caught on.

"Our names are on the list?" Zhang Yong looked ready to drool too.

"Yep." Li Yichen nodded to each of them and confirmed, "The list's on the noticeboard. I just checked it."

"Come on, let's go look." Unable to wait another second, Yang Weifeng called out, opened the door, and ran outside.

"Wait for us..." Sun Kai and Zhang Yong chased after him.

"Holy shit!" Li Yichen was dumbfounded. He hurried after them, shouting, "Could you put some clothes on first?"

If three guys ran onto the sports field in their underwear, their dorm room would become infamous. The "three male students streaking incident" would probably spread throughout the university. Even with his thick skin, he couldn't take that.

Ten minutes later, the "four-man peacock squad" appeared on the main campus road.

Only the three in front were strutting, though, each swaggering as if he owned the place. Behind them, Li Yichen kept covering his face and whispered, "Could you tone it down? This is so embarrassing."

They finally made it back to the noticeboard, where plenty of people were still gathered, craning their necks to search for their names.

"Boss, there are too many people. We can't get in," Zhang Yong said anxiously.

"No problem. Watch me." Yang Weifeng thought for a moment, then curled his lip. "Stay right behind me."

Then he marched up to the back of the crowd with his head high and chest out, reached out, and shoved the people at the rear aside, shouting, "Make way! Student council business! Everyone else, stand aside!"

"Badass!" Sun Kai and Zhang Yong couldn't help giving him thumbs-up.

Li Yichen acted as though he didn't know these idiots and stepped back, lest he get beaten up along with them.

The people who had been shoved aside were about to curse him out, but the moment they saw Yang Weifeng's towering six-foot-three frame, they shut their mouths and merely stared daggers at them.

Yang Weifeng didn't care in the slightest. He brazenly squeezed to the front and fixed his eyes on the list, getting so close his eyelashes almost brushed it.

"Holy shit, our names really are here!" Soon, Yang Weifeng looked away from the list and spoke to Sun Kai and Zhang Yong, his face full of excitement.

"Where? Let us see too." Delighted, the two crowded up to the front and looked at the list.

"Are those three in the student council?" someone suddenly asked. "How come I've never seen them?"

"I've never seen them either. Are they lying?" another chimed in.

"They definitely aren't members. I'm in the student council, and I've never seen them." That last person's words immediately sent the crowd into an uproar.

"Holy shit! Beat those three bastards to death!" someone suddenly shouted.

"Fuck! Guys... trouble... let's scram!" Seeing things turn ugly, Yang Weifeng hastily called out and took off running.