Chapter Summaries

Jian Ruonan’s forces used gas-cylinder and pressure-cooker rocket launchers to devastate the Wa Kingdom army on Greenbrow Mountain. After the enemy’s explosives continued detonating among their own troops, the Maiden Army declared a sweeping victory, and Jian Ruonan led them up the mountain to capture survivors and seize the treasure.

• Jian Ruonan had Dantai Mo read Black Tortoise’s embarrassing battle poems through a Loudspeaker while she and Abbot Li prepared the weapons.
• Mechuan Yaokuzi mocked the enemy and boasted of victory before a gas-cylinder rocket streaked toward the summit.
• Jian Chuxue launched Interceptor Explosives, but the gas-cylinder rocket broke through and killed fifty Wa Kingdom generals.
• Jian Ruonan ordered Abbot Li to fire the pressure-cooker rocket launcher, which killed thirty-three more Wa Kingdom generals and triggered further explosions at the summit.
• The Maiden Army declared a sweeping victory, and Jian Ruonan led them up the mountain to capture the enemy and seize the treasure.

Jian Ruonan and the Maiden Army captured the Wa Kingdom’s forces on Green-Eye Mountain and found the Previous Dynasty Treasure. On the return journey, Mechuan Yaokuzi declared his love for Commandery Princess Jiarou, who recalled Jian Ruonan’s warning about late affection.

• Jian Ruonan had soldiers carry her and Teng up Green-Eye Mountain in mountain sedans while Commandery Princess Jiarou climbed on foot.
• Jian Ruonan’s forces found Mechuan Yaokuzi and Jian Chuxue stuck together on the summit, arrested them, and uncovered the treasure.
• The Maiden Army counted twenty prisoners of war and two soldiers with minor injuries before Jian Ruonan ordered a triumphant return to the capital.
• Jian Ruonan caught Commandery Princess Jiarou sneaking around camp and warned her that affection arriving too late was worth less than grass.
• Mechuan Yaokuzi declared his love for Commandery Princess Jiarou in a pigpen, while hidden gossip-seekers watched nearby.

Jian Ruonan and the others gathered to spy on Commandery Princess Jiarou visiting Mechuan Yaokuzi in the pigsty, while Dantai Mo joined the gossiping crowd after questioning Black Tortoise about its secret dealings. Mechuan Yaokuzi tried to win Jiarou over with a dramatic confession, but she urged him to eat the flatbread she had brought.

• Jian Ruonan followed Commandery Princess Jiarou, and Black Tortoise coaxed Dantai Mo into joining the gossip group after he demanded an explanation for its contact with the Dog System.
• Jian Ruonan muted the subject while Wang Defa and the Marquis's Brother-in-law removed Jiarou, Mechuan Yaokuzi, and the Wa warriors from the group chat.
• The gossipers hid in the bushes, and Dantai Mo took Wang Defa's place beside Jian Ruonan.
• Jiarou brought Mechuan Yaokuzi a warm flatbread, and he explained that he had gone hungry because he could not bring himself to eat leftovers in front of his subordinates and the pigs.
• Mechuan Yaokuzi told Jiarou that he cared about her most and recalled a romantic memory beneath an apricot tree, while Jiarou urged him to eat.

Jian Ruonan and the gossip badgers watched Mechuan Yaokuzi try to win Commandery Princess Jiarou while avoiding questions about Mr. Snow. Dantai Mo pushed Wang Defa forward as a rival, and Wang Defa ended the chapter confessing his love to Jiarou.

• Jian Ruonan defended Jiarou from blame and Wang Defa kicked Captain Xue out of the gossip group for his poor gossip-watching ethics.
• Jiarou questioned Mechuan Yaokuzi about Mr. Snow, but he called Snow his adviser and asked her to flee with him to become his queen.
• Jiarou hesitated over Mechuan Yaokuzi's promises, while Jian Ruonan proposed finding her a more suitable suitor.
• Teng volunteered to court Jiarou, but Dantai Mo nominated Wang Defa instead and kicked Wang Defa out of the spectators' group.
• Wang Defa appeared before Jiarou and confessed his love to her.

Wang Defa confessed to Commandery Princess Jiarou, while Mechuan Yaokuzi tried to convince her that Wang Defa only wanted her money. Wang Defa challenged Mechuan Yaokuzi to prove his love, then turned the Pig Cage to reveal Jian Chuxue.

• Wang Defa confessed his affection to Commandery Princess Jiarou, and she asked whether he still liked Fifth Miss.
• Teng and Dantai Mo recalled signs of Wang Defa and Commandery Princess Jiarou growing close while playing mahjong.
• Wang Defa admitted he first noticed Commandery Princess Jiarou because she was wealthy, but said he admired her generosity and frankness.
• Mechuan Yaokuzi warned Commandery Princess Jiarou that Wang Defa wanted her money, while Wang Defa accused Mechuan Yaokuzi of the same motive.
• Wang Defa asked whether Mechuan Yaokuzi would still love Commandery Princess Jiarou if she gave her money to Fifth Miss, and Mechuan Yaokuzi said his feelings would never change.
• Wang Defa turned the Pig Cage around, revealing Jian Chuxue behind him.

Jian Chuxue and Mechuan Yaokuzi’s love triangle with Commandery Princess Jiarou ended in comic turmoil, while the Maiden Army continued its victorious return to the capital. At a relay station, Zi Azha and Shang Er plotted to use an infiltrator inside the Jinyang Marquis’s Residence to advance their scheme.

• Teng freed Jian Chuxue from her cage, and she confronted Mechuan Yaokuzi as he professed his feelings for Commandery Princess Jiarou.
• Mechuan Yaokuzi chose Jian Chuxue, and Commandery Princess Jiarou accepted their reunion before he asked her to imprison him beside Jian Chuxue.
• The Maiden Army continued its triumphant march toward the capital as three heirs of princes of fiefs traveled there for Emperor Deyuan’s Longevity Celebration.
• Zi Azha dismissed the threat posed by Jian Ruonan and her victory, while Shang Er warned him about the unexplained deaths in his family.
• Shang Er told Zi Azha that Gao Shou had infiltrated the Jinyang Marquis’s Residence, and the two agreed to work together toward their great undertaking.

Jian Ruonan returned to the capital victorious, and Emperor Deyuan promoted her to Dragon-Tiger General after learning the Maiden Army had defeated the Fire Ox Formation without casualties. She arrived on a motorcycle, which she passed off as a divine object, then called out a minister who had mocked her command.

• Emperor Deyuan learned that Jian Ruonan had captured enemies, seized war oxen, and planned a cattle farm in Tong County, so he promoted her to Dragon-Tiger General of the Principal Second Rank.
• After officials doubted the Maiden Army’s victory, a scout reported that it had defeated the Fire Ox Formation without losing a single soldier, and a court eunuch announced the army’s imminent arrival.
• Emperor Deyuan and the court went to welcome Jian Ruonan, who rode into the city on a motorcycle with Teng behind her and the Maiden Army following.
• Jian Ruonan called the motorcycle Iron Bull, claiming it was formed from the souls of three thousand war oxen, while a soldier warned Jian Chuxue not to insult the general.
• When Emperor Deyuan asked how she had defeated the Fire Ox Formation, Jian Ruonan asked the court for opinions and pointed out the minister who had said even a pig could lead the army to victory.

At court, Jian Ruonan exposed the flaws and embarrassing private lives of Bureau Director Sun and Official Ren after Emperor Deyuan asked them for strategies against the enemy. The ministers were left laughing at Sun’s new nickname and judging Ren’s dependence on his wealthy wife.

• Emperor Deyuan gave the ministers who had criticized Jian Ruonan time to propose a military strategy, and Bureau Director Sun suggested avoiding the enemy before attacking from behind.
• Jian Ruonan mocked Sun’s tactic, and a Light Screen revealed his history of abandoning friends, lovers, family disputes, and his concubine.
• The Dog System disclosed that Sun lasted four seconds in bed, and the court gave him the nickname Sun Four Seconds.
• Official Ren proposed splitting the ranks to let a charging herd pass, but Emperor Deyuan questioned what would happen to the supplies and baggage.
• Jian Ruonan exposed that Ren had married Wang, a wealthy older widow, for her money and that his wife’s family had secured his official position.

Jian Ruonan’s unusual strategy defeated the rebels’ Fire Ox Formation, and Emperor Deyuan promoted her to first-rank General Zhaowu. He then asked about reports that she had seized the Previous Dynasty Treasure, leaving Jian Ruonan alarmed and denying it.

• Official Wu proposed frightening the cattle with gongs, firecrackers, and shouting, then asked Jian Ruonan how she had actually broken the formation.
• Jian Ruonan explained that she had recognized Jian Chuxue’s surrender letter as a trick because she understood her enemy.
• The Scout revealed that Jian Ruonan had mixed an aphrodisiac and Multiple-Birth Pills into the cattle fodder, causing the bulls to fight and the cows to become pregnant, which ruined the Fire Ox Formation.
• Emperor Deyuan promoted Jian Ruonan to first-rank General Zhaowu after the court praised her victory.
• Emperor Deyuan asked Jian Ruonan whether she had seized the Previous Dynasty Treasure, and she denied that it had happened.

After the Maiden Army returned, Jian Ruonan and her companions denied finding the Previous Dynasty Treasure, then celebrated her homecoming at the Jinyang Marquis's Residence. At the welcome banquet, Jian Ruonan’s sword dance nearly struck Young Shi-shi, and Teng stepped forward to argue that his second aunt was also at fault.

• Emperor Deyuan questioned Jian Ruonan and the Maiden Army about the Previous Dynasty Treasure, but everyone denied knowing anything about it.
• Jian Ruonan brought Teng back to the Jinyang Marquis's Residence, where Min, Jian Xilu, and Jian Huayuan welcomed her.
• At the banquet, Young Shi-shi criticized Jian Ruonan and privately planned to have Jian Chuyun’s wedding overshadow Jian Xilu’s.
• Jian Ruonan offered to perform a sword dance for Old Madam and swung the Imperial Sword wildly.
• Young Shi-shi dodged as the sword slashed toward her, then accused Jian Ruonan of trying to kill her.
• Teng volunteered to speak up and argued that Young Shi-shi was also at fault.

Jian Ruonan mocked Jian Chuyun and Young Shi-shi over Jian Chuyun’s upcoming marriage to the Prince of Zhennan’s heir. The family learned that Jian Chuyun’s wedding was set for the same day as Xilu’s, and Jian Ruonan ended the chapter by deriding the heir’s age.

• Teng praised Jian Ruonan, who challenged Young Shi-shi and made the Old Madam declare that the trouble was Young Shi-shi’s fault.
• Jian Chuyun mocked Jian Ruonan’s roughness and marriage prospects, while Young Shi-shi revealed that Jian Chuyun would become the Heir Apparent’s Consort of the Prince of Zhennan.
• Jian Ruonan sarcastically congratulated Jian Chuyun and joked that she might marry the Prince of Zhennan herself to become Jian Chuyun’s mother-in-law.
• Min asked about the wedding dates, and Young Shi-shi said Jian Chuyun’s wedding was set for the eleventh of next month, the same day as Xilu’s.
• Young Shi-shi asserted that the heir apparent outranked Top Graduate Hou, and Jian Ruonan retorted that the thirty-eight-year-old heir was old enough to be a grandfather.

Jian Ruonan mocked Jian Chuyun’s impending marriage to Zi Azha, the Prince of Zhennan’s heir, while the household waited for his visit. Zi Azha arrived with lavish gifts, and Jian Ruonan prepared to claim one as the family gathered to meet him.

• Jian Ruonan exposed the heir’s age, two deceased wives, and unattractive appearance through her inner thoughts, enraging Jian Chuyun.
• Jian Chuyun hid behind a screen when Zi Azha arrived at the Marquis’s Residence to pay his respects.
• Jian Ruonan and Teng compared Zi Azha unfavorably with the men around him while Jian Chuyun insisted he looked respectable.
• Zi Azha presented expensive gifts for the Marquis’s children, and the household invited them to choose from the tray.
• Jian Ruonan asked for the concubines’ children to join in choosing gifts and claimed the gold ball, while Jian Chuyun accused her of trying to seduce the heir.

Jian Ruonan accepted a greeting gift from Zi Azha, then angrily confronted Jian Chuyun after she accused her of seducing him. Jian Chuyun returned to Young Shi-shi in tears, but the most obscene insults Jian Ruonan had used could not be repeated publicly.

• Jian Ruonan directed the Elder and Third Branches to bring their concubine-born children to choose greeting gifts, and Teng gave her a hollow gold ball.
• Zi Azha spoke approvingly to Jian Ruonan, prompting Jian Chuyun to accuse her of flirting with him after she left the Flower Hall.
• Jian Ruonan insulted Zi Azha and scolded Jian Chuyun, while Teng cheered her on and helped explain her swill metaphor.
• Jian Chuyun ran away crying and told Young Shi-shi that Jian Ruonan had cursed at her.
• Cui Zhu repeated Jian Ruonan's insults to Young Shi-shi, who realized the most vulgar details could not be spread around.

Jian Chuyun warned Zi Azha that the emperor planned to abolish the fiefs and told him Jian Ruonan was interested in him. Zi Azha tried to charm Jian Ruonan with poetry the next morning, but she humiliated him with a manure-soaked parody.

• Jian Chuyun visited Zi Azha late at night and warned him that the emperor intended to abolish the fiefs.
• Jian Chuyun told Zi Azha that Jian Ruonan was especially interested in him, and he promised to reject Jian Ruonan if she overstepped.
• Zi Azha waited outside Jian Ruonan's courtyard, hoping to win her over with his charm and a shower of peach blossoms.
• Jian Ruonan came outside and found Zi Azha striking the peach tree before he began reciting a poem.
• A maid accidentally splashed fertilizer into Zi Azha's mouth while Jian Ruonan mocked his performance with a crude poem of her own.

Jian Ruonan handled wedding preparations, rebuffed Shi Fan’s request for Multiple-Birth Pills unless he gave her father his ministerial post, and confronted Jian Chuyun over the heir apparent. When Jian Chuyun faked an injury in front of arriving guests, Jian Ruonan fell on top of her and accused her of hitting her.

• Jian Ruonan sent the Eldest Princess a blunt letter declining her offer to be the woman of complete blessings at Jian Xilu’s wedding.
• Shi Fan asked Jian Ruonan for Multiple-Birth Pills, and she offered them in exchange for his ministerial post for her father.
• Jian Chuyun accused Jian Ruonan of luring the heir apparent to Deer Song Courtyard, and Jian Ruonan mocked him for eating dung.
• Jian Chuyun tried to strike Xiaoyu, but Jian Ruonan blocked her as ladies approached.
• Jian Chuyun pretended Jian Ruonan had hit her and collapsed, so Jian Ruonan threw herself onto Jian Chuyun and cried that her sister had hit her.

Jian Ruonan humiliated Jian Chuyun, then met Dantai Mo, whose recovered legs and hidden investigation were exposed by Jian Ruonan’s all-seeing lookup. The chapter ended when Dantai Mo overheard her calling his Black Tortoise System a trash turtle and realized she knew about his need for energy.

• Jian Ruonan pinned Jian Chuyun down until she apologized for spreading rumors, then sent her away crying.
• Jian Ruonan met Dantai Mo privately and saw that he could stand; he thanked her for treating his legs and offered her a chest of gold.
• Dantai Mo admitted he had pretended his legs were still injured while investigating his fall from a horse.
• Jian Ruonan’s all-seeing lookup revealed that the three princes of fiefs had caused the horse stampede using gu, earning Dantai Mo 500 points.
• Dantai Mo asked Jian Ruonan to continue treating his legs, and she questioned whether the Black Tortoise System had kept the energy she used.
• Dantai Mo overheard Jian Ruonan call the Black Tortoise System a trash turtle and realized she knew he needed energy to heal his legs.

Jian Ruonan tried to treat Dantai Mo’s legs with acupuncture and moxibustion while the Black Tortoise System concealed how it had betrayed him. Her touch stopped his corruption from rising, and the chapter ended with Dantai Mo’s emotions earning her 1,000 points.

• Dantai Mo realized the Black Tortoise System had betrayed him and grew ashamed that Jian Ruonan might know he had stolen lamp oil.
• The Black Tortoise System warned Jian Ruonan that Dantai Mo’s corruption was rising, so she squeezed his legs and halted it.
• Jian Ruonan studied an acupuncture guide and located points on Dantai Mo’s legs while he tried to hide his embarrassment and growing affection.
• Jian Ruonan held a moxa stick over the points, and Dantai Mo denied feeling hot as his emotions earned her 1,000 points.

Jian Ruonan healed Dantai Mo’s legs and discovered that touching him earned her thousands of points, while Zi Azha became determined to win her after seeing her medical skill. The chapter ended with Dantai Mo secretly following her and mistaking her comparison of Zi Azha to a sawfish for evidence that she admired him.

• The Black Tortoise System admitted it had promised Jian Ruonan points from Dantai Mo in exchange for energy to heal his legs, and Dantai Mo questioned whether she knew about the stolen Lamp Oil.
• Jian Ruonan pressed Dantai Mo’s legs, gained thousands of points from his emotional reactions, and offered to massage him; the two systems gossiped about her treatment.
• After leaving the guest room, Jian Ruonan encountered Zi Azha, who realized Dantai Mo could walk again and asked her to examine him.
• Jian Ruonan agreed to treat Zi Azha when he offered her a tray of treasures as a consultation fee.
• Dantai Mo followed Jian Ruonan and heard her call Zi Azha a sawfish, then grew jealous when he saw a sawfish appear on the Light Screen.

Zi Azha prepared to use Harmony Incense on Jian Ruonan, while Jian Ruonan went to Jian Chuyun’s courtyard and uncovered a scandal about Granny Wang. The older women’s resolve to argue with Jian Ruonan crumbled as her inner voice revealed more of Granny Wang’s past.

• Zi Azha ordered his subordinates to stay away, took the Harmony Incense antidote, and convinced them that Jian Ruonan was dressing up for him.
• Jian Ruonan rode her Harley Motorcycle to Jian Chuyun’s courtyard and asked for Jian Chuyun to come examine the Sawfish.
• Jian Chuyun gathered Granny Wang and other sharp-tongued women to confront Jian Ruonan, and Granny Wang accused Jian Ruonan of behaving improperly in public.
• Jian Ruonan’s inner voice revealed that Granny Wang had repeatedly tried to get into Grandfather’s bed and that her husband had forced her to seduce men while watching.
• The older women were stunned by the revelation, and their fighting morale faltered as Jian Ruonan began looking for more gossip about Granny Wang.

Jian Ruonan’s gossip exposes scandals among Jian Chuyun’s grannies, who end up fighting each other and leave Jian Chuyun without her strongest attendants. When Jian Ruonan says the Heir asked her to examine him, her Light Screen reveals that his morning exercise is Latin dancing.

• Granny Wang charged at Jian Ruonan to stop her gossip, but Jian Ruonan knocked her into the bushes with her Harley Motorcycle.
• Jian Chuyun accused Jian Ruonan of cruelty, but Jian Ruonan turned the accusation back on her and demanded payment for supposedly exorcising Granny Wang.
• Jian Ruonan’s gossip revealed that Chen Pozi and Granny Zhang had each had affairs with the other’s husband, prompting the two grannies to fight.
• Jian Chuyun asked why Jian Ruonan had come, and Jian Ruonan said the Heir had requested an examination and invited Jian Chuyun along.
• Jian Ruonan used the Light Screen to see the Heir’s morning exercise and revealed that he was dancing Latin.