It was dinnertime.
Gua grimaced as he ate the Beef Hot Pot, which had been seasoned with sweet soy sauce, salty soy sauce, and white sugar.
"What's wrong? Doesn't it taste good?"
Dashan asked Gua with a stern face.
Gua straightened his lips and put on a serious expression. "It's good."
Gua felt that his emotional intelligence was almost too high. To come up with an answer that offended no one at a time like this-he really was impressive.
But then came the deadly follow-up question from his mother, Izumi.
"Then which is better, sweet soy sauce or salty soy sauce?"
Gua had no idea how to answer. It was just like being cornered by adults in his previous life and asked, "Do you like Daddy more, or Mommy?"
Gua really wanted to say, "Can't I like both?"
Judging by their expressions, though, liking both probably wasn't an option.
"I think, maybe, soy sauce just doesn't belong in Beef Hot Pot."
In the end, Gua chose a "neither" answer.
He felt incredibly clever for finding another way out of this situation.
And indeed, he was a genius. Faced with a choice between offending Dad and offending Mom, he had chosen to offend both Dad and Mom.
Sure enough, his father Dashan's mouth twitched slightly at Gua's answer.
"Son, you'll never find a girlfriend at this rate."
His father Dashan spoke with heartfelt gravity.
His mother Naiha planted her hands on her hips and glared at Gua, her cheeks puffed with indignation.
"Huh? Really?"
Gua was a little surprised.
He had lived two lives, and although he had been a shut-in in both and had never even held a girl's hand, surely he wasn't doomed to such a miserable fate?
"That's right, Gua!"
His mother Nai let out an indignant breath and stared at her clueless son, beginning to worry about her future daughter-in-law.
"Even so, I'm only six. Isn't it a little early to worry about girlfriends?"
Gua said.
"How is it early? You're already six, seven by traditional age reckoning. You'll be eight before you know it, nine in the blink of an eye, ten after the New Year, then eleven in no time..."
By the time she finished, his mother heaved a long sigh. "What will we do if you still can't find a wife at thirty?"
Faced with his mother's worries, Gua's expression turned solemn, as though a formidable enemy stood before him and a mountain loomed overhead.
Is the Night of the Massacre really that close already?
When his mother Nai mentioned being thirteen in the blink of an eye, Gua had immediately picked up on the crucial point.
Looks like I need to take assassinating Itachi seriously.
Gua silently told himself.
At the same time, he resolved to attach it to Itachi the moment he learned fire release tomorrow. Once his ninjutsu overwhelmed Itachi's, it would be time to eliminate that threat.
Seeing her son look as though he were facing a terrible enemy, his mother Nai smiled.
She reached out and gave Gua's head a firm yet gentle poke.
"Mommy was just teasing you. Our Gua is so handsome, plenty of girls will be chasing him someday."
That reminded Gua of what had happened after school that day.
Izumi's angry expression when she left was still fresh in his memory.
He had to find some way to repair their damaged little boat of friendship.
So he asked,
"Dad, if a girl is angry, how do I cheer her up?"
Uchiha Oyama froze.
Looking at Gua's earnest expression, he was momentarily stunned.
Has my son finally caught on, or did what Nai and I said just now scare him into thinking he needs to put finding a girlfriend on his agenda?
If it was the former, that was fine. But if it was the latter, Uchiha Oyama felt that he and Nai might have gone a little too far today.
"Gua, is she a girl in your class?"
Dashan asked tentatively.
"Yeah!"
Gua answered, "A really good friend."
Hearing that, Dashan breathed a sigh of relief. It seemed his son really had run into a boy-girl relationship problem.
With everything clear now, Dashan's lips curled upward. He exchanged a glance with Nai beside him, and each saw the same proud, gratified thought in the other's eyes: Our son is going places.
And so.
Uchiha Oyama prepared to pass down his entire twenty-nine-year collection of "secrets to wooing girls" to his son in one go.
"When you're pursuing a girl, you have to keep at it and strike while the iron is hot. Once your feelings for each other have warmed up, bring out your trump card: confessing your love! Remember, a confession is the fanfare of victory, never the battle cry for a charge!"
Gua had already known all about relentless pursuit and trump cards in his previous life.
What he lacked was an actionable plan.
"Could you give me something more specific to do?"
Gua asked.
His father Dashan's lips curved upward. He seemed to be getting carried away with the conversation, speaking with far more energy than his usual quiet self.
"Relentless pursuit means making sure the girl knows you treat her well. But you can't treat her too well, either. Too much is as bad as too little. Remember that.
"Before you've officially become a couple, never give her anything too expensive. That'll change the nature of your relationship. On the other hand, little everyday surprises often work much better. Bringing her breakfast every day, for example, is an excellent choice!"
Listening to his father Dashan, Gua felt doubtful.
That didn't sound quite right.
Could bringing breakfast every day really win a girl over?
But in his previous life, there had been a single name for people who did that: "simps"!
In fact, the moment someone mentioned "bringing breakfast every day," plenty of people would immediately equate it with "simping."
Was his father's method really reliable?
Gua was deeply skeptical.
But when he saw the encouraging look in his mother Nai's eyes, it suddenly occurred to him... perhaps girls in the shinobi world were different.
Gua looked at his mother, then at his father.
It seemed he had uncovered an incredible little secret today.
Was that how his father and mother had gotten together?
Thinking of it that way, if his father Dashan had been capable of such relentless pursuit in his teens, he must have been quite a spirited young fellow.
He definitely hadn't been as steady as he was now.
"Okay, I understand. Thanks, Dad."
Having finished dinner, Gua stood up and prepared to return to his room to sleep. He would be learning fire release tomorrow, so he needed to keep his energy up!
Watching his son leave, Dashan's lips curled upward.
"That's Uchiha Oyama's son for you! His talent might not be great, but if he can bring home a wife from the Ninja Academy, then going there won't have been a waste!"
As Dashan said that, his grin nearly reached his ears.
Nai propped an elbow on the low table and rested her chin in her hand, watching Dashan with an amused smile. "Back then, you knew to bring me breakfast every day. Now I cook for you myself, and you still argue with me over sweet soy sauce or salty soy sauce. Have you stopped cherishing me now that you've won me over?"
Dashan rubbed his nose, his ear-to-ear grin slowly fading. "Of course not! From now on, all the Beef Hot Pot in our house will have salty soy sauce!"
Uchiha Oyama spoke the last half of that declaration with absolute conviction.
"Pfft!"
Nai laughed.
With life this wonderful, how could she not be happy?
Before you continue