I confessed to him

Shan Ye acted on the thought right away, hailing a taxi and giving the driver Fan Jin's address.

Fan Jin lived quite far away, and the evening traffic was bad. It took Shan Ye over an hour to get there. He took a hundred yuan out of his wallet and handed it to the driver. "Keep the change. Thanks."

He immediately got out and ran toward Fan Jin's home, following his memory.

After running up to the third floor, Shan Ye stopped outside Fan Jin's door, took a deep breath, and knocked.

No one answered. He wasn't sure whether Fan Jin was home at this hour.

Or whether he hadn't come back yet.

Shan Ye waited outside the door. The lousy stairwell only had a sound-activated light, so he had to cough every so often.

He had no idea when Fan Jin would return.

He went from standing to squatting to sitting on the floor. He smoked all his cigarettes, and Fan Jin still hadn't come back.

He checked the time. It was past midnight. Fan Jin might not be coming back.

He stood up to go home when a cough suddenly sounded downstairs. That voice... it was Fan Jin.

He hurried to the stairs to look. The damned light had gone out again, and he and Fan Jin coughed at the same time.

The man below was climbing the stairs. He looked up and met Shan Ye's gaze.

Seeing Fan Jin supporting a drunken man, Shan Ye hurried down to help, then realized the drunk was Yaoyao's biological father.

Shan Ye frowned. It bothered him, but he held it in. He would help Fan Jin get the man upstairs first.

Fan Jin said nothing, letting Shan Ye help him carry Xu Jing into his home.

Shan Ye helped carry the man into the guest room, then watched Fan Jin take off his shoes and clothes and cover him with a blanket.

He really wanted to ask just what this man was to him.

Once they were done, Shan Ye walked over to the sofa but remained standing, waiting for Fan Jin. Fan Jin closed the guest room door and looked at him for a few seconds.

He spoke. "Why were you outside my door?"

Shan Ye wasn't afraid. During the three hours he'd spent outside, he had imagined a thousand possible conversations. His answer came readily. "I was waiting for you."

"What for?"

"There's something I want to tell you."

Fan Jin lowered his lashes and walked over to the sofa. "Sit down."

"How long did you wait?"

Shan Ye answered honestly. "Three hours."

Fan Jin raised an eyebrow. "You like men?"

That was so fucking blunt. Shan Ye had known they would get to this topic, but he hadn't expected it to happen so quickly, or so directly.

He might as well go all the way. Being gay wasn't illegal. He admitted it. "Yes, I like men. I'm gay."

He stared intently at Fan Jin. "Are you scared of me?"

Fan Jin smiled and cast him a sidelong glance.

He casually put a cigarette between his lips and pressed the lighter with his thumb. As the flame flared, Fan Jin tilted his head slightly, smoke drifting over his brow.

"Why would I be scared of you?"

"...I'm gay."

"You're not the first gay man I've met."

"...What if a gay man likes you?"

Shan Ye must have been shaken by what had happened tonight to confess so quickly. He was afraid he couldn't hold on to Fan Jin, that the distance between them would only grow.

Fan Jin exhaled a mouthful of smoke. "How many days have you even known me?"

He suddenly took on a lecturing air.

Shan Ye lowered his head. "It has nothing to do with how many days."

"You like me?" Fan Jin scoffed. "Wasn't someone hanging all over you tonight?"

"No! I didn't touch him. I wanted to push him away, but then I saw you-"

"I was scared you'd think... I was that kind of person too. But I'm really not." He did his best to explain. Whether Fan Jin believed him or not, he had to say everything on his mind.

"Shan Ye." It was the first time Fan Jin had called him by name.

"Who you like and what kind of person you are have nothing to do with me." He paused. "I don't like men, and I don't like you. Understand?"

Shan Ye froze. Fan Jin's rejection was decisive. He had played this outcome over in his head many times, so he wasn't particularly surprised. He even felt somewhat calm.

Shan Ye wasn't so nervous now. He asked in return, "Then why did you go to a gay bar?"

Fan Jin smiled. "Are only gay people allowed in?"

Shan Ye suddenly smiled. He had lived for twenty-eight years; he wasn't about to lose face over one remark. He stood up and bent forward, leaning closer to Fan Jin until their eyes met.

Shan Ye asked softly, "You're straight?" He stared sharply into Fan Jin's eyes. He could tell whether a man was straight just by looking into his eyes.

Fan Jin met his gaze. "Yes."

"Your ears are so red. They must be burning, huh?" Shan Ye glanced at the reddened tips of his ears.

As soon as he said it, he noticed Fan Jin's ears twitch and his pupils shift. He curled his lips. Not wanting to embarrass Boss Fan, he smiled and said, "If you're straight, I can still turn you gay. If you're gay..." He deliberately paused.

"Then what?"

"Then I'll make you fall in love with me."

Fan Jin turned his head away and laughed, leaning back against the sofa. "Where do you get that confidence?"

Shan Ye straightened up, his smile gentle and his voice relaxed. "I'm teasing you. I'm not that capable."

"But I really do like you. I'm very attracted to you."

Fan Jin seemed to breathe a sigh of relief. He glanced at Shan Ye and took something out of his trouser pocket.

It was a flash drive. He held it out to Shan Ye, whose gaze shifted to it.

"Why do you have that?"

"It was in the stuff you dropped off at noon."

Shan Ye realized he must have put the flash drive in the bag. He accepted it with a smile. "Thanks, Fan."

"Fan?"

Shan Ye's eyes curved into crescents. "You're four years older than me. What else should I call you?"

"Why didn't you reply to my text?" Fan Jin looked up at him.

"Text?" Shan Ye frowned. "I didn't get one. When did you send me-"

"Wait, that was you?" He suddenly realized.

He immediately took out his phone and found the junk text. He'd thought someone was harassing him and had even blocked the number. He hadn't expected it to be from Fan Jin!

"I-I thought it was someone harassing me. I thought it was someone I'd been set up with." He hurried to unblock the number.

Fan Jin laughed. "Someone you were set up with? You've got a lot going on."

Shan Ye shut his mouth. The more he said, the messier it got, and the more mistakes he made.

"I really didn't ignore you on purpose. I'd be thrilled to get a message from you..."

Fan Jin stood up. "Go home. It's late." He glanced at the clock. It was already past one in the morning.

Shan Ye suddenly felt dizzy. "Can-can I..."

"No."

Shan Ye wasn't happy. "But he gets to." He pointed at the guest bedroom.

"I only have two bedrooms. If he takes one and you take the other, where am I supposed to sleep?" Fan Jin asked.

A naughty thought suddenly occurred to Shan Ye. "I don't mind-"

Fan Jin was merciless. "I do."

Fine. His Fan was too heartless, sending him home this late at night. What could he do?

"Then can you drive me home, Fan? I didn't bring my car."

"Please." He was certainly quick to beg.

Fan Jin was silent for a while, then suddenly changed his mind. "Stay here tonight."