Fearlessness had never meant having no fear, but overcoming fear through an ever-deepening understanding.
Kallen had already forgotten exactly when he had decided to cast life and death aside. When he had first crossed the sea to Vien, he had harbored contempt for religion, including his own rejection and criticism of the God of Order, influenced by his grandfather.
After peeling back the veil of this world step by step and gradually seeing the nature of this special world clearly, he looked down at his feet and discovered that what he stood upon was the "Light of Order."
Whether he wanted it or not, there was no turning back. Even though selfishness, cowardice, greed, and other things still objectively existed within him, he had become caught up in the role. He had preached too many principles and stirred too many emotions. When the crucial moment came, he really was too embarrassed to take it all back. He could only stake everything. Even if it was an abyss, he had to jump.
In truth, Kallen had already died during the incident in the Pollution Underground Tunnel.
He had not merely lost his former body, as richly stocked as a general store, but had also torn away that thin yet undeniably present veneer of refined self-interest.
He had willingly "died" for his faith. It was an affirmation of both his faith and himself. From then on, he no longer felt uncertain inside. When he spoke of Order Doctrine again, he could teach others with a clear conscience, while also demanding that the Order Followers under his command die for their faith on the battlefield.
Alfred's private notes clearly recorded the changes in his young master during that period. These records could not appear in the New Light of Order, because in official