Soft reassurances

Qi Yu leaned against the headboard, a soft cushion supporting his lower back. Chun He had placed two behind him. He had thought that was too many and pulled one out himself, only for Chun He to tuck it back in. Gray Rabbit lay on the quilt beside his knees, ears drooping and twitching now and then. Light Gray Rabbit curled into a ball against Gray Rabbit's rump. The two rabbits huddled together, warm and cozy.

His fingers were rubbing the back of Gray Rabbit's neck when he saw his imperial father walk in. The moment the door opened, morning light flooded in from behind his father, casting a long shadow across the floor. Instinctively, he tried to get out of bed to pay his respects, but he had barely moved his legs before his father reached the bedside.

Qi Xiao asked him whether that palace maid had hurt him, directly and without preamble. Qi Yu shook his head, then nodded. He shook his head because the woman had not had time to touch him, and nodded because she had indeed frightened him. That night, he had opened his eyes to find a naked woman lying beside him, smiling at him. That smile had chilled the blood in his entire body. He had screamed, and then knew nothing more.

"She has been dealt with. No one will foist anyone on you again." Qi Xiao paused there, lowering his voice further. "I was remiss."

"From now on, I will personally choose the people who serve in your hall," Qi Xiao said.

"What about Chun He and A Ping?" Qi Yu asked.

"They have served in your hall for a long time. Naturally, they will stay."

"What about Qin Wei?"

"Qin Wei is your study companion, not a member of your hall's staff. But he sent word through someone today, asking when you could return to the Imperial Study. The Grand Tutor said you have missed several sets of lecture notes. If you do not go back soon, he will make you copy the Book of Documents as punishment." At the words "copy as punishment," the corners of Qi Yu's mouth turned down. He remembered that he had not attended lessons for quite a few days. Qin Wei had probably copied out two sets of his lecture notes, one for himself and another left in Qi Yu's desk compartment, waiting for his return. He withdrew his hand from his father's palm, looked down at his own fingers, and suddenly asked whether A Rong was dead. Qi Xiao was silent for a while, then murmured an assent.

Qi Yu, too, fell silent for a while. He remembered that palace maid pouring tea for him, her voice meek when she spoke, her eyes always lowered. Then he remembered the smiling face he had seen when he opened his eyes that night, as white as a mask in the candlelight. He pulled the quilt up a little.

"It was my fault. I should not have let those people come." Qi Xiao tucked a loose lock of hair behind his ear, then let his fingers settle on his shoulder and patted it gently twice. The touch was very light, as light as when he was little and woke from a nightmare in the middle of the night, and his father would scoop him out of the covers and pat his back, saying, "I am here." "From now on, if something troubles you, tell me directly. Do not hide away on your own. For every day you hid, I spent a day looking for you."

Qi Yu looked up at his father. He remembered those days he had hidden in Yuning Hall, pretending nothing had happened, attending lessons and feeding the rabbits as usual each day, but never taking a single extra step toward Xuanzheng Hall. He had thought his father did not know, but it turned out his father knew everything. He said, "Then you have to tell me things from now on too, Father. You have to tell me what troubles you too." Qi Xiao did not answer, only nodded gently.

"I'm not afraid anymore," Qi Yu said. "I'm not afraid when you're here."

At some point, the two rabbits in the Side Hall had jumped off the quilt and huddled together on the little rug at the foot of the bed. Gray Rabbit washed his face with his front paws, while Light Gray Rabbit rested his chin on Gray Rabbit's back, his ears twitching. Sunlight streamed through the window and fell across the edge of the bed, warming the bright yellow brocade quilt. He heard A Ping speaking quietly with Chun He in the corridor again. Chun He said His Highness had drunk an extra half bowl of porridge that morning, and A Ping said the Imperial Kitchen would have to prepare an extra portion of braised spare ribs for lunch. Listening to those sounds, he suddenly felt very much at ease. He pulled the quilt up to cover half his face and, imitating his father's tone, said in a muffled voice, "I was remiss."