The man was Hidan.
The moment Hidan prepared to get rough, Kakuzu and Uchiha Itachi emerged from the woods, landing on either side of Konan in unspoken coordination.
Kakuzu had long been curious about this bizarre man. He stepped forward and snorted. "Let me see whether you really can't be killed..."
"Huh? Who are you guys? Where'd you come from?"
With a look of wisdom in his eyes, Hidan carefully sized up the two men and one woman in their strange outfits, then said in sudden realization:
"Oh~ I get it. You're all wearing the same flashy clothes, so you must be a band!"
"That masked guy with the beady eyes must be the bassist!"
"As for the girl in the middle, she looks like the lead singer and keyboardist!"
"No, no, wait..."
Hidan held his head and pointed at Uchiha Itachi, looking torn. "Hmm! This handsome guy must be the lead singer. Am I right?"
"Beady... eyes?"
All five of Kakuzu's hearts flared with anger. Grinding his back teeth, he advanced on Hidan step by step and growled menacingly:
"We're not a band! Is there something wrong with your head?!"
"Hmph, whatever. I don't care who you are! Lord Jashin will be delighted to have people like you as sacrifices!"
Whoosh!
The instant Kakuzu reached him, Hidan swung the scythe in his hand at him with all his might.
Kakuzu dodged easily. An old hand, he chose not to seize the opening to attack, instead observing his opponent's movements and techniques as he evaded.
"Ahahahaha~ What's wrong? All you can do is run? You're not getting away!"
Hidan leaped into the air, raising the Triple-Bladed Scythe overhead with one hand, intent on delivering a fatal blow to Kakuzu.
Kakuzu was growing bored. Figuring that further testing would only yield an endless stream of dull Taijutsu, he snorted and swung both hands. Two iron fists as hard as stone shot out, piercing straight through Hidan's chest.
Squelch!
A mouthful of blood sprayed from Hidan's mouth.
Hidan's body hit the ground heavily, and he groaned in pain...
"Hmph. So that's all you've got." Kakuzu was somewhat disappointed. This brat was far too weak.
"Ugh, it... it hurts..."
A few seconds later, Hidan suddenly got up as though nothing had happened and shouted hysterically at Kakuzu:
"Hey! That really hurt, you bastard!"
"...Oh?"
At the sight, tremendous confusion showed in Kakuzu's eyes, mixed with a little satisfaction and appreciation...
"I've had enough! I'll pass divine judgment on you!"
Although Hidan wasn't particularly smart, his brain did work on occasion.
Just now, after Kakuzu pierced his chest with his hands, Hidan had taken advantage of Kakuzu lowering his guard. As he fell, he had secretly collected a few traces of Kakuzu's blood from his black-thread "blood vessels" at tremendous speed.
Kakuzu hadn't noticed these details.
But they hadn't escaped Uchiha Itachi's eyes.
"Prepare to die!"
Stepping in his own blood, Hidan drew the vivid red symbol of the Jashin Cult on the ground.
Bam!
Another iron fist plunged into Hidan's chest.
Kakuzu wanted to pierce Hidan once more to see whether he really couldn't die.
"Damn it! Are you ever going to stop?! I already told you not to!"
Hidan grabbed the black threads, forcibly pulled the fist out of his body, and flung it back to Kakuzu.
"Hmm... It seems the rumors about your immortal body were true."
Hidan had earned Kakuzu's approval.
"Hmph!" Hidan gave a sinister laugh and licked Kakuzu's blood with the tip of his tongue. "Everything is ready. Let the ritual... begin!"
As soon as he finished speaking, the skin all over Hidan's body miraculously turned a horrifying black and white.
"?"
This remarkable transformation stunned Kakuzu, Itachi, and Konan alike, but what Hidan did next surprised them even more!
"Die!"
Hidan drew a black spear from inside his coat and drove it forcefully into his own chest!
Why's he started hurting himself?
Kakuzu muttered disdainfully to himself. Suddenly, the heart in which he was muttering throbbed with intense pain. Kakuzu knew this sensation: it was the feeling of a heart being destroyed.
"You... you bastard... ugh!"
Clutching his chest, Kakuzu writhed painfully on the ground.
"Wahahahaha... That feels good! So good! Sharing pain with someone feels absolutely amazing! May Lord Jashin bask in glory forever!!"
Hidan now looked every bit the crazed cultist, dancing about as he thanked Lord Jashin for everything he had given him.
"Itachi, have you figured out his ability?" Konan asked from the side.
"He licked Kakuzu's blood and said the ritual had begun. He probably used some sort of technique to connect himself to Kakuzu's body, allowing him to transfer the damage he takes to the person whose blood he licked..."
Hearing this, Konan nodded in agreement with Itachi's analysis.
"But I'm not quite sure why he can't die."
Itachi kept his eyes fixed on Hidan, hoping to glean more information from his actions.
Just then, the "dead" Kakuzu's body suddenly began to swell. A masked black monster burst out of him, turned into a puddle of black water, and gradually dissipated.
Kakuzu stood up.
He was alive again.
"Huh?"
Still in a state of ecstasy, Hidan froze, then craned his neck and shouted, "Hey, hey, hey! Why aren't you dead yet?!"
Kakuzu glared furiously at Hidan. "You've got some nerve, destroying my precious heart! I'll slaughter you!"
"Hehehe! You can't!"
A second battle between the two was about to erupt.
"Itachi, stop them," Konan ordered.
"...We're not getting rid of him?"
"No. His ability is very well suited to our organization, and to Kakuzu."
Hidan swung his Triple-Bladed Scythe, and Kakuzu lashed out with his iron fists. Just as they charged toward each other, a flock of crows blocked their path.
Within the flock, Itachi's silhouette slowly appeared.
"Itachi! What are you doing?!" Itachi's interference greatly displeased Kakuzu.
"Recruiting him..."
"...Him?"
"Yes, him." Konan looked at Hidan and asked, "Would you like to join our Akatsuki?"
"Huh?"
Hidan's face was full of disdain. "Are you kidding? I refuse! I don't know anything about this Akatsuki business. I have my own mission! To spread the faith of the Jashin Cult!"
Konan tried to persuade him. "Spreading your faith amounts to nothing more than killing people. That gives you all the more reason to join Akatsuki, because we're a killing organization that will stop at nothing. Wherever there's assassination or war, you'll find our presence..."
"Really?"
"Yes... With us, you'll be able to spread your faith faster..."
"..." Hidan looked at the three people before him. After a moment's thought, he said, "Hmph. An organization with powerful people like you probably wouldn't lie to me."
Konan said, "Then you're agreeing?"
"Hmm... As long as it doesn't interfere with spreading my faith, I really might join Akatsuki... Huh?" Hidan had been about to nod in agreement, but before he could finish, Konan suddenly fell to the ground, clutching her stomach and groaning incessantly.
"Ugh... ugh... It hurts... My stomach hurts so much..."
At the sight, Kakuzu and Itachi froze, then turned their eyes toward Hidan in unison.
"Hey! You bastard, was this your doing?!"
Hidan spread his hands, his face a picture of innocence. "Hey, hey, hey! Are you kidding me?"
Kakuzu said, "You're the only one with that ability to hurt people from a distance! It's fine if you don't want to join Akatsuki, but isn't secretly attacking someone when their guard is down going a little too far...?!"
Hidan said, "It really wasn't me!! I haven't licked this woman's blood, and I'm not standing in the circle! How could I activate my ability?!"
Thinking this was an act on Konan's part, Itachi said evenly, "It seems my analysis was correct. His ability really does require someone else's blood. Konan, you can stop pretending. Get up."
"Ugh, I... I'm not pretending. My stomach really... really hurts! S-someone must have... done something to me!"
"...?"
Itachi's pupils contracted. He finally realized that this wasn't so simple.