February 4, 2000, New Year's Eve. In the basement of a building in San Francisco Chinatown, there were no fireworks or dumplings, only the smell of mold, blood and cheap perfume that never went away.
A Xiu was sitting on the cold wooden bed, holding a small mirror with three cracks in her hand. She bought it with tips from three customers, and it was her only personal item in this Hell.
What was reflected in the mirror was a completely destroyed face.
A hideous tic-tac-shaped scar split from the middle of her forehead, across the left eye, the bridge of the nose, the right cheek, and extended to the chin. The wound has not completely healed, and the edges are covered with dark red flesh, like an ugly centipede lying on her face. Three days ago, Jake made the scar in front of everyone with a sharp fruit.
But who would have thought that just two years ago, this girl was the most beautiful girl in the small fishing village of Fujian Ningde.
A Xiu's real name is Lin Xiulian, and people in the village call her A Xiu. She has a pair of eyes as clear as sea water, and when she smiles, they bend into two crescents, revealing two shallow pear dimples. Her skin is the unique healthy wheat color of a seaside girl, and her two long black braids hang down to her waist. She sways them when she walks, which attracts the boys in the village to secretly look at her.
A Xiu's temperament is as tough as the rocks on the seaside, and as gentle as the sea water. She helped her mother fish, weave nets, and do housework since she was a child. She supported half of the family at the age of fifteen. Her hands are particularly skillful, and her lotus embroidery is the best in the village. She is so famous that when any girl gets married, she always wants to beg her to embroider a pair of red embroidered shoes. She is also kind-hearted, and she will take the initiative to help anyone who has difficulties. The old people in the village say that whoever marries A Xiu will be really blessed in his previous life.
But A Xiu doesn't want to get married.
Her younger brother is about to go to junior high school, and the tuition fee has not yet been paid. Her mother worked hard in the early years and became very poor in middle age. She took medicine all the time, and the family already owes a lot of debt. A Xiu wants to go out to work and earn a lot of money, so that her brother can study and her mother can treat diseases.
Just then, A Fang came back.
A Fang was the first person in the village to go to United States. She was wearing a fashionable dress, gold necklace and gold earrings, holding a mobile phone in her hand, and she spoke with a few words in foreign language. She looked very beautiful. The whole village surrounded her, listening to her tell the story of United States with envy.
"United States, there is really gold everywhere!" A Fang sat on the threshold of A Xiu's house, chewing melon seeds and spitting, "Wash dishes in any restaurant and you can earn two thousand US dollars a month, which is more than 10,000 yuan when converted into RMB! It's more than what we earn here in a year!"
She held A Xiu's hand and said, pretending to be affectionate. "A Xiu, you are so beautiful and hard-working, you will definitely make a lot of money if you go to United States. By then, let alone your brother's tuition, you will be able to buy a big house in the county."
A Xiu's heart beats.
"But... I don't speak English." She said hesitantly.
"What are you afraid of!" A Fang said, patting his chest, "Chinatown are all China people, and they don't need to speak English at all. I have a good friend in San Francisco who has opened a large Chinese restaurant and is short of waiters. I told her that you can go to her place to work, and the food and accommodation are included, and the salary is three thousand dollars a month. How about it?"
"Really?" A Xiu's eyes lit up.
"That's still fake!" A Fang said, "We are all from the same village, can I still lie to you? If you want to go, I will help you with the procedures. The handling fee is only five thousand yuan."
A Xiu's mother was a little worried. "A Fang, isn't there any danger in this?"
"Auntie, just be more at ease!" A Fang said with a smile, "I've been with United States for five years, isn't it a good thing? A Xiu will follow me and I will ensure that she enjoys good food and drinks, and comes back in glory in two years!"
A Xiu believed it.
She took out all her family's savings and borrowed money from relatives. Finally, she collected five thousand yuan and gave it to A Fang.
On July 12, 1998, A Xiu carried a shabby cloth bag, said goodbye to his mother and brother, and followed A Fang on the ship bound for United States.
She stood on the deck, looking at the receding coastline, filled with longing. She seemed to have seen her brother carrying a new school bag to school, and saw the smile on her mother's face.
She doesn't know, she is heading towards Hell.
The ship drifted on the sea for a full twenty-one days. When A Xiu finally set foot on San Francisco's land, the person who greeted her was not the good friend A Fang said who owned a Chinese restaurant, but a tall and burly white man.
He is Jake·Wilson.
Jake is about 20 or 30 years old. He has blond hair and blue eyes. He is wearing an expensive suit and looks polite. But there is no warmth in his eyes. When he looks at people, he looks like he is looking at a product.
A Fang took a thick envelope handed over by Jake, counted the money inside, and showed a satisfied smile on his face.
"I brought you the person, the money and goods are clear." She said to Jake.
"Good job." Jake nodded.
A Xiu was stunned.
"Sister A Fang, what's going on? Didn't you say you would take me to a Chinese restaurant to be a waiter?"
A Fang turned his head, the smile on his face disappeared, replaced by a look of indifference and contempt.
"Waiter?" She sneered, "Do you think United States's money is so easy to make? What else can you do besides selling your body?"
"You... you lied to me!" A Xiu's voice trembled.
"What's the matter with lying to you?" A Fang said coldly, "If it weren't for me, you would still be fishing in that poor ravine. Just be content. After you work hard and make money, you have to thank me."
After saying that, she took the money and left without looking back. She never looked at A Xiu again.
Jake took A Xiu to the darkest corner of Chinatown, a basement without windows.
This is his underground brothel.
The basement was divided into a dozen small cubicles of less than two square meters, each with only a shabby wooden bed. A dozen girls like A Xiu lived here. They all came from various places in China and were sold by traffickers like A Fang.
"From today on, you are mine." Jake leaned against the door frame, looking at A Xiu up and down with eyes that looked at goods, "Here, what I say is the law. You must be obedient and make good money. If you dare to disobey..."
He pointed at a girl with a scar on her face in the corner. "Did you see her? She tried to escape last time, and I broke her legs."
A Xiu was shaking all over.
She wanted to run, but the door was locked.
That night, Jake raped her.
She resisted desperately, scratching and biting. But how could she beat a tall and strong white man. Jake was annoyed by her and punched her in the stomach. A Xiu curled up on the ground in pain, like a wounded kitten.
"Bitch!" Jake kicked her hard, "Remember your identity! You are the dog I bought with money!"
From that day on, A Xiu's Hell life began.
She has to receive more than a dozen customers every day, from eight in the morning to two in the morning. If she slows down a little, she will be beaten severely by Jake. Jake does not regard them as human beings. In his eyes, these girls are just tools for him to make money.
Because a customer was dissatisfied, he would strip the girls naked and hang them from the rafters, smoke them with a belt, and burn them with cigarette butts. He would force the girls to eat rotten food and drink dirty water. He would have sex with them in front of all the girls to humiliate them.
When A Xiu resisted for the first time, his right leg was broken by Jake.
She lay in bed for a whole month before she could walk. During that time, no one came to see her. Only an old woman who was deaf and mute brought her a bowl of cold rice and a glass of turbid water every day.
She lay on the cold wooden bed, looking at the moldy ceiling, thinking about her mother over and over again. She wanted to go home.
She thought that as long as she could run out and find the police, the police would definitely help her.
In March 1999, A Xiu escaped for the first time.
She climbed out of the ventilation duct in the basement while Jake was not paying attention. She ran as fast as she could on the cold streets with bare feet. She ran through one street after another and saw well-dressed pedestrians, bright store windows, and police patrols.
As if grasping a life-saving straw, she ran towards the policeman.
"Mr. Police! Help! Please help me!" she shouted in broken English.
The policeman stopped and turned to look at her.
A Xiu thought she was saved. She cried and told him her experience, saying that she was sold by human traffickers, locked in the basement, and beaten and raped every day.
But the policeman just looked at her indifferently, his eyes full of contempt and impatience.
"Illegal immigrants?" he said with a frown.
He took out the walkie-talkie and said a few words. Then, he grabbed A Xiu's arm and pushed her into the police car.
A Xiu thought he was going to take her to the police station and help her punish the bad guys.
But she was wrong.
The policeman took her to a remote alley and threw her to the ground.
"Go back to where you belong." He said coldly, "Don't cause any trouble for me here."
Then, he drove away in a police car.
A Xiu was stunned on the spot, his whole body was cold.
At this moment, Jake's bodyguard found her.
They dragged her back to the basement.
Jake hung her from the rafter and beat her with a belt all night long. Her back was covered with criss-crossing blood marks, and there was no good piece of flesh. The other girls lowered their heads and did not dare to look at her. They were numb. They knew that resistance was useless.
In this country, no one cares about the life and death of these yellow-skinned illegal immigrants.
In October 1999, A Xiu escaped for the second time.
She hid in a vegetable truck and drove to Oakland. She thought Jake couldn't find her this time.
She hid in a park for three days and made a living by picking up food thrown away by others. She met an old Chinese lady. She asked the old lady for help, saying that she had been sold by a trafficker and wanted to borrow some money to call home.
The old lady looked at her and sighed.
"My child, it's not that I don't want to help you." She said, "Jake is very powerful in Chinatown, and there are people in both black and white circles. If I help you, he will kill me."
She gave A Xiu a piece of bread and left in a hurry.
The next day, Jake found her.
This time, Jake knocked out three of her front teeth.
Her face was swollen like a pig's head. She couldn't even eat rice and could only drink porridge. She looked at her ugly appearance in front of the cracked small mirror and cried for the first time.
She couldn't figure out why it was so difficult for her just to go home.
Why is this country that claims to be free and equal, so indifferent and cruel to her?
February 1, 2000, three days before the Spring Festival.
A Xiu escaped for the third time.
This time, she had been planning for a long time. She saved up her tips for three months and bought a boat ticket back to China. She hid the ticket in the sole of her shoe and ran out at night.
She ran all the way to the pier. She had already seen the ship bound for Shanghai and the five-star red flag flying on the pier.
Her heart was pounding. She could finally go home.
She can see her mother and her brother.
But just as she was about to board the ship, Jake's bodyguard caught her.
They dragged her back to the basement like a dead dog.
Jake was completely angered. He felt that A Xiu's challenge to his authority again and again was the greatest insult to him.
He called all the girls into the hall.
He pushed A Xiu to the ground and, in front of everyone, used a sharp fruit knife to make a tic-tac-toe mark on her face.
One sword, two swords, three swords...
Blood flowed down A Xiu's face, dripped on the ground, and dyed her clothes red.
The severe pain made her almost faint. But she did not cry or shout.
She just looked at Jake quietly. There was no fear or anger in her eyes, only dead silence.
"Let me see how you can run away in the future." Jake said with a grin, "Now, no one will want you. You can only stay here for the rest of your life until you die. When you die, I will throw your body into San Francisco Bay to feed the fish."
From that day on, A Xiu changed.
She no longer spoke or resisted. When guests came, she was like a soulless puppet, at the mercy of others. When Jake beat her, she remained motionless, as if she had no consciousness.
Other girls said, A Xiu is crazy.
Only A Xiu knows that she is not crazy.
She is just waiting.
Waiting for a chance to go home.
She had heard that if you die wearing red shoes, your soul will find its way home.
She wanted to drift across the vast Pacific Ocean and return to the small fishing village where she was born and raised.
February 4, 2000, New Year's Eve.
There were intermittent sounds of firecrackers outside. People in Chinatown were celebrating the New Year. There were laughter and laughter everywhere, and the smell of food was everywhere.
There was dead silence in the basement.
The girls huddled in their cubicles, crying silently. They also missed home.
A Xiu took out a cloth bag from under the bed. Inside the cloth bag was a piece of red cloth cut from the cotton-padded jacket her mother made for her. It was the only thing on her body that came from her hometown.
She folded the red cloth and put it in her arms.
Then, she quietly walked out of the room.
It was pouring rain outside. The cold rain hit her face, cutting her skin like a knife. The wounds on A Xiu's face were soaked in the rain and turned white, and it hurt terribly. But she didn't care at all.
She wrapped the thin shirt tightly around her and walked in the muddy alley. The rain wet her hair, and strands stuck to her face. Her bare feet were covered with mud, and were cut open by the gravel on the ground. The blood mixed with the rain flowed down, leaving a series of crooked bloody footprints behind her.
The street was deserted. Occasionally, a car drove by, splashing high water on her body. The white driver in the car stuck out his head, glanced at her with disgust, cursed "Damn China guy", then stepped on the accelerator and drove away.
A Xiu did not raise her head. She just lowered her head and walked silently. She knew that in this country, no one would care about the life and death of a yellow-skinned illegal immigrant. They would just treat her as trash and Pestilence and avoid her.
Three months ago, she saw A Fang at the Chinatown vegetable market. The woman was wearing a sleek mink coat, carrying a shiny designer bag, and had a man with oily hair and pink face on her arm. A Xiu was bargaining with the vegetable vendor. The sun fell on her bright red nails, which made A Xiu's eyes hurt. At that moment, the scars on A Xiu's body suddenly began to hurt so much that she could hardly stand still.
From that day on, A Xiu would start following her whenever there was an opportunity. Every time Jake allowed them to go out together to buy daily necessities, she would find an excuse to break away from the group and go around to the wealthy street where A Fang lived. She was like a lurking bird in the shadows. The cat inside silently observed the woman who ruined her life. She watched A Fang go out to do her hair on time at nine o'clock every morning, go to the cafe for afternoon tea at three o'clock in the afternoon, and go to high-end restaurants with different men at night. She figured out the house number of A Fang's apartment.
Jake and his younger brothers were having a party upstairs and were very drunk. The door to the basement was ajar. A Xiu took out the fruit knife that she had sharpened countless times from under the bed - the same one that Jake used to scratch her face. She hid the knife in her sleeve and slipped out of the basement like a shadow.
When she knocked on the door of A Fang's house, the woman was wearing a silk nightgown, applying a facial mask, and holding a cup of hot milk in her hand. When she saw A Xiu at the door who was soaked with water and had hideous scars on her face, the cup in A Fang's hand fell to the ground with a clang, and the milk spilled all over the floor.
"You... why are you here? What do you want to do?" A Fang's voice shook like chaff, and she stepped back step by step, "Where is Jake? How did you escape?"
A Xiu didn't speak. She just looked at A Fang quietly, her eyes as calm as a pool of stagnant water. She approached step by step until A Fang retreated to the corner, with no way to retreat.
"You lied to me." A Xiu's voice was very soft, but with a biting chill, "You said United States that there is gold everywhere, and you said that I can make a lot of money, let my mother cure diseases, and let my brother study."
"I'm sorry...A Xiu, I was wrong..." A Fang knelt on the ground with a plop and kept kowtowing, "I will give you all the money, can you let me go? I don't dare to do it anymore..."
A Xiu shook his head.
"Oh, it's too late," she said.
She raised the knife in her hand.
There was no screaming or struggling. A Xiu's movements were very steady, and each knife stabbed accurately and deeply. Blood spattered on her face, mixed with the scars on her face that had not yet healed, and it was difficult to tell which was the old blood and which was the new blood. A Fang's body slowly fell to the ground, her eyes wide open.
A Xiu stood next to the corpse and looked at it quietly for a long time. There was no joy of revenge or fear of killing in her heart. It was as if she had just completed something that should have been done long ago.
She wiped the blood on the knife and hands with A Fang's nightgown, and left the apartment quietly.
When she returned to the basement, the party upstairs was still going on. No one noticed that she had left, and no one cared where she went.
Now, she has to do one last thing.
She walked for a whole hour and finally came to Li's Tailoring Shop.
The wooden door of the tailor's shop was closed tightly, with a faint light coming from inside. A Xiu raised his hand and knocked gently on the door.
"Dong dong dong."
There was no movement inside.
She knocked again, a little louder.
"Old Li, it's me, A Xiu. Open the door."
After a long time, there was a sound of shuffling footsteps coming from the door. Then, the door opened a crack.
Tailor Li stuck his head out, he was still young at this time.
When he saw clearly that it was A Xiu standing outside the door, his eyes widened suddenly.
"A Xiu? Why are you like this?" He quickly opened the door and pulled A Xiu into the room, "Come in, come in! Don't freeze!"
The room was very warm. A small coal stove was burning in the corner, making a crackling sound. Several old-fashioned cheongsams and tunic suits were hung on the wall, and the table was piled with cloth and needlework. The air was filled with the smell of mothballs and cloth, which was the warmest smell A Xiu had ever smelled in his life.
Tailor Li poured a cup of boiling ginger tea for A Xiu and gave her a dry towel.
"Quickly wipe it." He looked at A Xiu distressedly, "Look at you, your whole body is soaked. The injury on your face... was that damn Jake's doing?"
A Xiu took the ginger tea and held it with both hands. The warm tea flowed down her throat and into her stomach, dispelling a little chill. She nodded and said nothing. The tears finally couldn't help but fall down and hit the cup, causing ripples in circles.
Tailor Li sighed and shook his head.
"That place is not for human beings." He said, "But what can I do? Jake dominates the sky in Chinatown, and the white policemen wear the same pants as him. If I dare to help you, he will burn down my shop. It doesn't matter that I am an old Bones, but if I die, my family will also suffer. I am incapable of helping you, hey."
A Xiu knelt on the ground with a plop.
"Old Li, make me a pair of red embroidered shoes." She raised her head, the scars on her face looked particularly hideous under the light, but her eyes shone with a strange light, "I heard the old people in the village said that if you die wearing red shoes, your soul will find its way home. I want to go home. I miss my mother."
Tailor Li looked at her with tears streaming down her face.
He stretched out his trembling hands and helped A Xiu.
"Good boy, get up quickly." He choked and said, "I will make them for you. I will make you the best red embroidered shoes and embroider them with your favorite lotus. Let you go home beautifully."
He took out the best red satin from the cabinet and the thinnest silk thread. He put on his glasses, sat in front of the sewing machine, and started making shoes.
His hands were shaking so much that he had to thread the needle several times before he could get it in. But he did it very seriously, sewing every stitch and every line very carefully.
A Xiu sat on the small stool next to him and looked at him quietly.
The room was very quiet, with only the clicking sound of the sewing machine and the sound of rain outside.
"Old Li, do you know?" A Xiu said softly, "The lotus flowers embroidered by my mother are very beautiful. When she taught me to embroider, I always couldn't learn it and messed up the threads. She was not angry, she just smiled and scratched my nose, saying that I was a stupid girl."
"My brother is so naughty. He goes to the beach every day to catch fish and shrimps and gets himself covered in mud. Every time he comes home, his mother spanks him, but after the spanking, she makes him something delicious."
"There is a lotus pond in front of our house. In the summer, the lotus flowers in the pond are in bloom, which is beautiful. My brother and I often go to the pond to play and pick lotus pods to eat. The lotus seeds are sweet and delicious."
Her voice was very soft and soft, as if she was talking in her sleep. A long-lost smile appeared on her face, as if she had returned to that sunny little fishing village, back to her mother and brother.
Tailor Li was making shoes and listening at the same time. Tears kept falling from his face, dripping on the red satin, and causing small water splashes.
At dawn, the red embroidered shoes were ready.
The shoes are very beautiful. They are made of bright red satin, with two lifelike lotus flowers embroidered on the upper. The petals are layered on top of each other, and the stamens are embroidered with golden silk thread, sparkling under the light.
A Xiu picked up the shoe and looked at it carefully. Her fingers gently touched the lotus on it.
"It's so beautiful." She said with a smile, "It's even more beautiful than my mother's embroidery. Thank you, Old Li."
She took off the silver ring from her neck and placed it on the table. The ring had turned black, but the small lotus flower engraved on it was still clearly visible.
"My mother gave this to me." A Xiu said, "After I leave, please help me keep it. If one day, my family comes to see me, give this to them. Tell them that I miss them. Tell them that I am going home."
Tailor Li picked up the silver ring and held it tightly in his hand. His hands kept shaking.
"Good boy, don't worry." He choked and said, "I will keep it safe for you."
A Xiu bowed deeply to Tailor Li.
"Thank you, Old Li. You are the only good person I met in United States."
She put on the pair of red embroidered shoes. The shoes fit her feet very well, just like her mother had made them herself. They were soft and warm when she stepped on the ground.
She turned around and walked out of the tailor shop.
The rain has stopped. There is a hint of fish belly white on the sky.
A Xiu was walking on the street in the early morning. Her steps were light and steady.
She passed by a Chinese restaurant. There was laughter and laughter inside, and the smell of dumplings and braised pork wafted out. A family was eating New Year's Eve dinner inside. A little boy's laughter was particularly loud.
A Xiu stood outside the window and watched quietly for a long time.
Then, she turned around silently and continued walking forward.
She returned to the dark and damp basement.
The other girls were awake. They stood in the corridor and looked at her quietly. No one spoke.
They all knew what she was going to do. They all understood her.
In this Hell, death is the only escape.
A girl named Xiao Mei came over. She took out a small candle from her arms and handed it to A Xiu.
"Take it." Her voice was hoarse, "Let the road be brighter."
A Xiu took the candle and smiled at her.
"Thank you."
She walked into her cubicle and closed the door.
She took off the shirt that was stained with mud and blood and put on a clean white shirt. This was made for her by her mother when she came to United States. She was reluctant to wear it and hid it under the bed for two years.
She combed her hair and re-braided her two long braids.
Then she moved a stool and placed it under the beam.
She stood on the stool and tied a rope to the beam.
She took one last look out the window.
The sun has risen. The golden sunlight shines through the narrow transom window in the basement, casting a small spot of light on the ground.
A new year has begun.
Mom, brother, I'm back.
A Xiu kicked over the stool under his feet.
The pair of red embroidered shoes embroidered with lotus flowers were swaying gently in the air.