I Have a Plan

What?!

Kūkaku's eyes glistened as she pulled herself upright, sitting bolt upright as though she had risen from her deathbed.

Although she now felt like eating Dōsan alive, Kūkaku, who had learned to treasure what she had after losing it, merely gave him a resentful look.

Dōsan was like a soulless walking corpse, his eyes vacant and unfocused, his right hand resting weakly against the wall. His chest heaved violently from time to time, as though he were enduring something, and the lifeless expression on his thoroughly worn-out face was exactly like Ganju's usual look.

Kūkaku and Ganju looked at each other. She and Ganju had never seen Dōsan so utterly distraught.

Under his big sister's piercing gaze, Ganju steeled himself, turned his feet inward, and asked awkwardly, "Dōsan-chan, what were you doing out there today? Why did you come back so late?"

Something was wrong, very wrong. Little Dōsan had gone out to buy groceries, so how had he come back empty-handed and completely distraught?

"Sorry, Sister Kūkaku, Brother Ganju. I went out to have a meal with someone and came back a little late."

That probably counted as having a meal with someone, even though he had spent the whole afternoon eating while the girl captain watched.

Ganju gazed resentfully at Dōsan. Don't talk about eating! I was practically in the grave, and you didn't even care. You still had the heart to eat!

The two-hundred-pound baby was hurting inside, but he wouldn't say it.

There was no way he could have spent the whole day eating. Kūkaku scrutinized Dōsan from head to toe.

This was a little like when Brother Kaien had been in love, sneaking around all day and coming home looking drained of energy every time.

Kūkaku stopped her foolish little brother, who had missed the important point, and stammered, "The person you, uh, ate with—was it a man or a woman?"

A man or a woman?

Dōsan thought of Soi Fon, small and as adorable as a sprite. "I suppose she'd count as a girl."

The sushi was wreaking havoc in his stomach. Dōsan really couldn't take it anymore. Clutching his stomach, he apologized weakly, "Sorry, Sister Kūkaku, Brother Ganju. I'm not feeling very well."

As Kūkaku and Ganju exchanged horrified looks, Dōsan ran into the house in a panicked, trembling rush.

The two of them—no, along with Koganehiko and Shiroganehiko, who were too stunned to speak—all four were deeply shaken.

Ganju threw both hands into the air and fell to his knees, looking up. "Why haven't even I, the Crimson Bullet of West Rukongai, found a girl I like? Could it be that even the Soul King is jealous of my good looks?"

Kūkaku rolled her eyes at Ganju but didn't strike him. After all, this baka had always been foolish more often than not.

Although he wasn't a pig her family had raised from childhood, they had spent nearly a month together day and night, and now he was about to root up someone's cabbage. Kūkaku felt something she couldn't quite put into words.

Kūkaku sat cross-legged in the corridor, a smoking pipe between her lips, taking puff after puff.

This felt even more different from when her older brother had been in love. This time, Kūkaku was more experienced and felt far more involved.

"Ganju, get up. Be a man."

Ganju wiped away his tears and snot and looked resolutely at his sister.

"Brother Kaien once said, 'Every romance is a battle destined to be lost, but we have to make thorough preparations!'"

"Ganju, get ready. Don't let her look down on the strength of our Shiba Clan!"

"Yes, Sister!"

Kūkaku put her hands on her hips and cackled. If the girl knew what was good for her, she would agree to be with little Dōsan.

If she didn't, Kūkaku reached out with her right hand and made a few grabbing motions in the air.

Hehehe...

"Oh, right, little Dōsan probably didn't get enough to eat while he was out on a date with his girlfriend!" Kūkaku remembered her older brother's experience. "Koganehiko, Shiroganehiko, I'll leave Dōsan's dinner to you. He probably can't stomach anything too greasy."

"Just make some sushi!"

"Yes!" The brothers Koganehiko and Shiroganehiko answered just as energetically.

Kūkaku pulled off her headscarf, sending her black hair swinging down like a waterfall. Fierce flames rose in her eyes. This was the Shiba Clan's greatest crisis of the year!

After Soi Fon returned to the Second Division, she wasn't in a very good mood either.

Dōsan Hanyū's plight was too tragic. Such a sincere, hardworking boy was being exploited by those vile nobles.

If she used the meal she had treated him to as leverage to coerce Dōsan Hanyū, how would she be any different from those vile nobles?

But Dōsan could also eat a little too much, and the heavily indebted Soi Fon's small frame couldn't quite bear the burden. So she went to the Second Division's resident sucker.

"My deepest apologies, Captain Soi Fon. Here are the 100,000 kan."

Soi Fon accepted the banknotes and nodded in satisfaction.

Ōmaeda didn't mind either.

He was even more satisfied. At thirty percent interest a year, given a Soul Reaper's long lifespan, he would practically earn back however much he lent.

Soi Fon didn't mind either. In any case, it was all being charged to the division's account. She might be gone one day, so why think so much about it?

Seeing that Soi Fon was about to leave, Ōmaeda's greasy face twitched twice. "Captain Soi Fon, please wait."

"Captain Soi Fon, have you thought this through? According to our Second Division's report, even if you feed him his fill every day, will he really join the Second Division?"

That's right!

Thinking back, even Captain Unohana had invited him, only to be refused.

Who was Captain Unohana?

She had been voted the Gotei 13's most popular female captain for ten consecutive years, gentle as a Yamato Nadeshiko and beautiful as the white moonlight. Her appeal to young boys was extraordinarily effective.

Yet even so, to repay a debt of gratitude, Dōsan hadn't hesitated for a moment.

Today, even though he had clearly been starving, he had still saved the most delicious honey sushi for him.

Soi Fon felt helpless too.

Seeing that the captain wasn't paying attention to him, Ōmaeda patted the fat on his chest with a slap, slap and looked at Soi Fon with great confidence.

"I have a plan. It will get Dōsan Hanyū to join our Second Division without the slightest effort."

"So busy, so busy," Rangiku Matsumoto said, her feet propped up. She had actually worked for three hours today. The vile Tenth Division simply didn't treat her like a person.

Rangiku wondered where she could get her hands on some sake.

But then she suddenly caught a faint whiff of sake. Unlike the delicate plum-sake fragrance of Dōsan's brew, this sake was richer, its aroma spreading through the air. Just smelling it made Rangiku Matsumoto's throat feel hot.

Huh? Are my wishes coming true?

"Hm? What a coincidence. Isn't this Lieutenant Rangiku?"

Three weeks later, despite Isshin Shiba's repeated attempts to stand in her way, Rangiku Matsumoto had successfully taken over as lieutenant of the Tenth Division, dropping the "acting" from her title.

Rangiku narrowed her eyes, finally shifting her gaze away from the sake flask. A large gold tooth gleamed so brightly in the moonlight.

"Third Seat Ōmaeda, this should be our Tenth Division's jurisdiction, shouldn't it?"