The Value of a Simp

It must be said that everything has its counter.

Ma Qiao, who has the innocent and adorable Vivi completely under his thumb, really doesn't know how to deal with a wicked woman like Reiju.

Ma Qiao really couldn't understand whether he was threatening her with Sanji, or she was threatening him with Sanji.

In short, with the excuse that "everything is for my younger brother," everything Reiju does seems to become reasonable.

Faced with Reiju's provocative gaze, Ma Qiao retreated in panic.

Then he made a phone call to Twitch.

"Twitch, you wouldn't want your master to be poisoned at his happiest moment, would you?"

"From now on, you will double your intake of toxic food."

Moreover, simple natural toxins are no longer sufficient to match your current status and digestive system.

My suggestion is that we could try using Fukushima nuclear wastewater.

Of course, nuclear wastewater doesn't exist in the world of One Piece.

Wano Country does have wastewater, but it looks like it contains excessive heavy metals, which is what causes Minamata disease, so it's not as potent.

However, although Krieg was killed, Gangplank said that some poison gas bombs were still stored in the outpost's warehouse.

Ma Qiao demanded that he immediately cooperate with Twitch in a drill simulating a police-criminal conspiracy, and to legitimately hand over the poison gas bombs to the Shadow Unit.

Just as Ma Qiao had finished making the necessary arrangements, Garp suddenly sent him a QQ message.

This QQ account is Garp's official QQ account; the profile picture shows him wearing a white suit and a justice cape.

He appears to be very honest and reliable.

If it weren't for Ma Qiao having a backdoor in the system that allowed him to learn some of Garp's unknown secrets, he would almost have been fooled by all this superficiality.

Some people may appear to be upright and noble old generals, but it's hard to say what they really are.

"Scarf Kid, I've brought you some business. This time, a big shot is coming. Do your best, or the Marine Headquarters' sanatorium might just move from Sabaody Archipelago to Alabasta in the future."

The "important figures" naturally refer to the Sengoku.

Although the Marine Headquarters is a subordinate agency of the World Government.

However, it is clear that its power is similar to that of the Imperial Japanese Navy Ministry during World War II, and it has a strong bargaining power with World Governments.

The decision on where to establish an official sanatorium can be made by the Fleet Admiral alone, without the need for approval from government officials.

If it really works out, it would be a fantastic thing for Ma Qiao.

Ma Qiao wasn't entirely sure how many soldiers Rear Admiral were in the Marine Headquarters, but he was certain that the number was quite large.

After all, the mere Alabasta Kingdom has a standing army of 600,000... just kidding!

Ma Qiao has been active in Alabasta for several months now.

I've been to the capital city a few times.

In this godforsaken place, with its lax military preparedness, how could it possibly have a standing army of 600,000? Ma Qiao would have sent Tahm Kench's head to Cobra to kick around like a football.

However, while Alabasta most likely no longer has a standing army of 600,000, it's not an exaggeration to say that the Marine Headquarters has 600,000 troops, after all, it is a standard world police force!

Only...

Coming to the desert for health retreat, I wonder if Garp even came up with that idea.

In fact, Ma Qiao planned to build a medical city in Shurima.

Medical treatment is medical treatment, and recuperation is recuperation. Although they have some similarities, they are not the same in essence.

As a result, it seems that the old Garp enjoyed Kennen's electrotherapy treatment and fell in love with photon skin rejuvenation, leading to a slight misunderstanding of Shurima's positioning.

It's understandable for older people; they always like to socialize with friends.

Whenever a supermarket offers discounted eggs, the elderly residents of the entire neighborhood flock to it.

Garp has always been adept at stirring up trouble.

However, accepting the Navy's convalescent care mission was indeed a tempting offer that Ma Qiao found hard to resist.

Generally speaking, a health resort should at least have green mountains and clear waters.

There is a mountain behind the Shurima Town.

However, apart from weathered rocks, there wasn't even a cactus on the mountain.

The good news is that, because of its low starting point, Shurima's greening growth rate this year is likely to exceed one-tenth of a berth.

Green mountains and clear waters—this is certainly too much of a luxury for a country like Alabasta.

But adding a little greenery is perfectly reasonable...

"I'm insane, I need a certificate from Dr. Ma."

Ma Qiao met Jinx tinkering with a rocket in a special care ward at Shurima Hospital.

Next to Jinx, the Virtuoso, is helping out.

Jhin is also quite skilled with individual weapons, although his skill level is far from that of Jayce. However, he at least has some common ground with Jinx.

For example, how to blow up the Holy Land Mary Geoise in 108 different ways.

Ma Qiao came over to inspect the progress of the work, Jinx happily reported that the development of the Fishbones was completed.

After handing Jinx a certificate of mental illness stamped with his own seal, Ma Qiao got what he wanted: a small, single-soldier rocket launcher.

He took Nami, Vivi, and a group of Retainers with him and headed to the desolate mountains behind the town.

This place is so barren it brings tears to my eyes.

This is no longer a question of whether birds poop or not.

Apart from some desert scorpions, there were almost no signs of life on the mountain along the way.

Finding a suitable hillside, Ma Qiao jumped off Tahm Kench's head, who then vomited out a large bag of something that looked like cement.

This is a prohibited item, Dance Powder, which is banned in many countries.

"Uncle, are we really going to use this kind of thing?"

Vivi bit her lip. "Why don't we try digging for water from underground?"

Do you really think that indiscriminately extracting groundwater is better than artificial rainmaking?

Isn't that so?

Ma Qiao has always held reservations about the brains of even the natives of the One Piece world.

In the original work, using Dance Powder to create artificial rain is seen as a villainous act, while the old man who stubbornly and relentlessly extracts groundwater in a land with depleted water resources is regarded as a hero.

This view on water resource utilization is truly incomprehensible.

Fortunately, Ma Qiao had a clear-headed local pirate by his side.

That's Nami, the Cat Burglar.

Nami is a natural navigator; she has an incredible talent for meteorology.

This talent is so powerful that even a great pirate like Golden Lion would risk being dragged into a movie, and so powerful that even Zeus, who was made from Big Mom's soul, could be subdued.

Nami has not yet gone to Weather Sky Island for further studies.

However, thanks to the fact that Ma Qiao is not an ignorant and incompetent King Luffy, over the past six months, through his connections in the Navy or by directly purchasing books, Ma Qiao has acquired a whole roomful of meteorology books for Nami.

Although her progress is not as rapid as that of the old man from Sky Island who taught her by example, Nami has now surpassed most so-called experts in meteorology.

"Vivi, you've misunderstood Ma Qiao."

Nami took out a nautical chart near Alabasta, marked with the direction of the monsoon and ocean currents.

"Alabasta is a large, water-scarce island primarily due to the unique monsoon climate in the region."

"Every year in February, which is now, the monsoon winds carrying ocean moisture blow from the South Blue towards the northeast."

"In other words, Shurima is the last stop of this monsoon. After passing through Shurima, the monsoon will reach the sea and turn the moisture into rain, which falls into the ocean. If we trap the moisture in the monsoon, it will not cause any trouble for others."

Listening to Nami's earnest analysis, Vivi tugged at her ear, finding it surprisingly reasonable. However, upon closer reflection, she felt there were still some issues:

"But what if the monsoon winds change direction in autumn? If it doesn't rain for six whole months, even if we plant anything, it will wither and die."

"This will require the use of water conservancy facilities."

Ma Qiao pointed to a depression in the valley. "If we could build an artificial lake here, perhaps we could retain enough rainwater to cope with the dry season."

According to Ma Qiao, if the prototype of Alabasta is Ancient Egypt, then the Alabasta people should also have a racial talent for building water conservancy facilities.

However, this time it was Nami who poured cold water on Ma Qiao's enthusiasm.

"I'm afraid that won't work. According to my calculations, the cloud cover precipitation here is very limited. Even if we prepare enough Dance Powder, the average annual precipitation here will only reach 140 millimeters."

"At the same time, the sunlight here is too intense, and the water stored up by the spring monsoon cannot survive the long summer."

Ma Qiao remembered that in his previous life, Gansu Province had an average annual rainfall of three to four hundred millimeters, so 140 millimeters of rain was truly heartbreaking to witness and bring tears to one's eyes.

But even the smallest mosquito is still flesh; where there is rainfall, there is life, and life is Tenacity.

"Jinx, get ready to launch the rocket."

Ultimately, Ma Qiao felt that doing something was better than doing nothing.

"Yes, Dr. Ma Qiao!"

Jinx hoisted her beloved Fishbones onto her shoulder, a maniacal grin spreading across her face.

Nami then set up professional measuring equipment and informed Jinx of the exact launch location.

"Rules are meant to be broken!"

Jinx yelled, and the rocket shot out from her thin shoulder, hitting the center of the cloud a few seconds later.

Bang!

The rocket exploded, and the 100 kilograms of Dance Powder it carried exploded like fireworks on New Year's Eve.

The moisture-laden clouds shuddered as if someone had grabbed their waist, and then a light drizzle began to fall.

Tick-tock, tick-tock.

Raindrops fell on Vivi's nose, bringing the fragrance of spring.

Even though she still harbored some fear towards the Dance Powder, Vivi was now moved by the vibrant life force of the rain.

The rain quickly intensified.

Ma Qiao and the two girls, Vivi Nami, quickly hid under Tahm Kench's belly.

As for Jinx, she's happily jumping in mud puddles.

Perhaps due to artificial rainmaking, or perhaps because the cumulonimbus cloud itself had a limited capacity, the rain stopped after only about fifteen minutes.

After all, according to Ma Qiao's estimate, the reason Crocodile was able to create a nationwide drought was that it directly drained most of the moisture from these clouds at the source of the monsoon, preventing them from reaching the amount of rainfall required.

I wonder where all that water Crocodile absorbed went after he metabolized it?

Even if women are made of water, this is still way too outrageous.

It has to be said that the world of One Piece is indeed quite magical; even Newton don't apply here.

This was just a small-scale test rainfall.

Jinx's rockets are very reliable, steady, and accurate, but the final result is somewhat different from expectations.

This was mainly because Ma Qiao overestimated the potential of the cloud cover in the Alabasta region.

However, the rain that fell in just half an hour was already quite abundant for the outskirts of the Shurima Town.

In the moist soil, fast-growing desert plants quickly sprouted, absorbing water and growing rapidly, and blooming beautiful little white flowers within a day.

Inside the valley, in the puddles formed by rainwater, the croaking of frogs could be heard.

These frogs have been sleeping at the bottom of the dried-up riverbed for years, even decades, just waiting for the rainy season to complete their ultimate goal of mating and reproduction.

In short, what was a lifeless, forbidden valley just half an hour ago has now become a vibrant ocean of flora and fauna.

But Ma Qiao knew that this was just a fleeting moment. Without further water, these flowers, grasses, frogs, birds, and beasts would disappear quickly after a few days, just like their ancestors, hiding themselves and silently waiting for the next heavy rain.

It seems that with this little bit of rainwater, there's no hope of achieving any greening by relying on normal plants.

Ma Qiao plans to create a small grove here to block wind and sand and Cleanse the air.

We should at least provide a place for the elderly to take a morning stroll.

Fortunately, just because ordinary plants don't work doesn't mean all plants don't.

Ma Qiao also has the option of having reliable Retainers.

When it comes to landscaping, you'd obviously need the duo of plant-like individuals, not Amumu with his green hat...

Etc?

Ma Qiao touched his chin.

Amumu seems to be quite prone to crying.

Deep beneath Shurima, in a vast space excavated by Rek'Sai, Ma Qiao has already moved the entire spring here.

Using his masterful Summoning Technique and hand seals, three enormous plumes of white mist slowly rose in front of Ma Qiao.

Then, three heroes, one large, one medium, and one small, emerged from the white mist.

Vegetative state patient number one.

Strong and healthy, honest and kind, Maokai a twisted tree spirit skilled in Asian bondage.

Vegetative state patient number two.

Zyra, the Rise of Thorns, is a woman of graceful figure and alluring beauty, and a master of the Queen's Whip.

Mobile juicer.

Big head, short stature, covered in bandages, the ultimate simp who's a master at licking his brother's boots, Amumu's Lament.

"It is my honor to serve you, my master!"

The three heroes bowed to Ma Qiao.

Ma Qiao smiled and nodded, then eagerly leaped over Maokai and Zyra to reach Amumu.

Ma Qiao pulled out a photo of Annie and Teemo together.

Amumu was struck dumb, and tears welled up in his eyes.

Ma Qiao bent down and said earnestly:

"Brother Amumu, you don't want this kind of thing to keep happening, right?"

"To be honest, Captain Teemo is the first Retainer I recruited besides the Freedom Trio."

"Three hundred and sixty-five days a year, Teemo has been working diligently in the dark and dreary mushroom garden, striving to realize his self-worth."

"He has now become the top lieutenant, no, the top pillar, in the mushroom cultivation field of the Big Bird Consortium."

"Brother Amumu, if you don't work harder, you'll be completely outclassed by Teemo!"

I don't even want to think about how Annie will view you all...

"Fortunately, I, your master, am a benevolent capitalist who loves to bring hope to young people. Now, an opportunity is before you, Brother Amumu, you must seize it!"

"Oh, right, Amumu, if you want to woo girls, you need a strong physique. Starting today, your meals will be in Tahm Kench's hands, making sure they're low in salt and sodium..."

--A side note--

I worked until 5 a. m. last night... and I'll continue tonight. See you tomorrow at noon, dear readers.