Pirates: How Many Divisions Do the Five Elders Have? A Rough Start

Lieutenant Nezumi had settled into the town inn for the time being.

His public explanation was that his old anal fissure had flared up again.

That was a serious matter, so naturally he wasn't fit to go back out to sea.

Every day, Nezumi helped the town dispose of its expired, spoiled food. He was less picky than the livestock in a pigsty.

Igaram felt somewhat guilty.

He thought his inadequate care had caused the officer to fall ill.

Nezumi declined his well-meaning offer to improve his meals.

Twitch, the great man that he was, would never eat the people's food for free.

Of course, if Igaram really felt guilty, it wouldn't hurt to show a little appreciation with some "local specialties."

And so Ma Qiao's personal account reached 2.5 million Beli once again.

Only 500,000 Beli of that had come from running the tavern.

The profits from selling cheap, low-quality booze and cigarettes to Pirate Hunters were hardly worth mentioning compared to what corruption and bribery brought in.

All in all, Ma Qiao's sustainable poverty continued.

But a turning point seemed to be just around the corner.

Wednesday.

The Big Bird Spin-Spin Tavern was closed for its regular day off.

On the second floor of the tavern, Ma Qiao's little class was in session.

"Stinky old man, I'm here!"

Ma Qiao didn't know if he was imagining things, but Vivi's little camisole seemed to be getting thinner and lighter.

Although Ma Qiao knew that dwindling amounts of fabric were a major trend in the development of fashion in the pirate world, he still put on a stern face and gave her a harsh scolding.

"What the heck!"

Vivi pouted. As she put on a cover-up, she muttered, "It's just getting hotter, that's all! Besides, you read those kinds of magazines, so this is nothing, right?"

Vivi really hadn't expected this lecherous old man to be so conservative.

Was it because I don't have a figure like those shameless women?

Vivi silently added another serving of milk to her meal plan for the day.

She had been quite well behaved lately.

After her attempt to contact Igaram failed, Vivi had begun deciphering the secret message "Dr. Mundo says Mr. 0 is a big woman" on her own.

She believed the sentence wasn't as straightforward as it looked, and that the truth was by no means so simple.

There must be some foreshadowing I don't know about yet.

Taking on the identity of Edogawa Vivi, she had been searching for the slightest clues.

For now, though, what Vivi looked forward to most was the upcoming "Great Sea Survival Guide Series Course."

Come to think of it, as an intern at Baroque Works, Vivi had yet to learn a single bit of combat experience or knowledge from her supervising instructor, Ma Qiao.

Ma Qiao had also considered that slacking off this much might be going a little too far.

The interns' first practical assessment was only a few days away. It wouldn't be good if Vivi, absorbed in her detective game, got knocked flat with a single punch.

He had to teach her at least something.

But before the lesson began...

"Vivi-chan, if—and I mean if—there were an extremely powerful Den Den Mushi that far outperformed every product on the market, but cost an extra one or two thousand Beli a month, would you consider buying it?"

"Huh?"

Vivi blinked.

She thought the old man's question had come out of nowhere.

"Two thousand Beli a month? Who would use something like that?"

Vivi shook her head like a rattle-drum.

Two thousand Beli wasn't much to her, but wouldn't that money be better spent on forty pieces of cotton candy?

Why spend it on a Den Den Mushi?

Could it be...

A possibility occurred to Vivi. "Do you mean the rare black and white Den Den Mushi?"

Black Den Den Mushi liked exchanging information with their own kind and were often used as listening devices.

White Den Den Mushi were the opposite. They were placed on ordinary Den Den Mushi to emit jamming waves and prevent eavesdropping.

Both types of Den Den Mushi were very rare.

If that was what he meant, paying a little extra might be worth considering.

"Uh... no, not those."

Ma Qiao shook his head.

He pulled a Den Den Mushi from his pocket. It looked ordinary, but its shell bore the Big Bird (Penguin) Spin-Spin logo.

"Although it can't eavesdrop or prevent eavesdropping, it's still very special..."

"For example?" Vivi tilted her head.

"It lets you chat with strangers. Give it a shake and you might find a handsome guy. Isn't that interesting?" Ma Qiao suggested.

"Huh? A handsome guy?"

Vivi rose onto her toes in her white stockings and reached out to pinch Ma Qiao's cheek. "Look, I've already found one."

Ma Qiao's pre-class sales pitch ultimately ended in failure.

These days, even begging a student to play on her phone during class didn't work.

Who could he complain to about that?

In short, Vivi couldn't understand what use a Den Den Mushi that could text strangers would be.

She had absolutely no interest in the shake feature, either.

As the princess of Alabasta, how could she possibly be short of so-called "promising young men" around her?

But these so-called "promising young men" showed their true colors whenever the country fell into crisis.

Either they were helpless and useless, or they believed every rumor they heard, too young, too simple, and were exploited by people with ulterior motives.

All in all, Vivi had found that those guys seemed less reliable than the stinky old man.

Of course, when it came to saving the country and such, she still had to keep working at it herself.

"Vivi, oh Vivi, you don't have time to waste on boring things!"

Holding to that conviction, Vivi had no interest in using instant messaging software like WeChat or QQ.

Especially when its monthly "phone bill" cost her the equivalent of forty pieces of cotton candy.

Even though Ma Qiao repeatedly assured her that the Big Bird Brand Den Den Mushi could later add features such as photo transfers, video calls, community interaction, and even payments, shopping, and navigation, Vivi remained unmoved.

It wasn't as though special Den Den Mushi like Image Den Den Mushi, projection Den Den Mushi, and photography Den Den Mushi weren't already on the market.

As for navigation and the like, an Eternal Pose was more than enough.

Why go to all the trouble of making some "all-in-one" Den Den Mushi?

In Vivi's view, the strange experiment Uncle Ma Qiao was tinkering with was completely pointless and bound to cost him everything.

"What a pitiful person..."

The two simultaneously cast each other a look of pity.

They sighed.

Ma Qiao wasn't discouraged.

He even felt a little sorry for this ignorant native who hadn't been tempered by the age of big internet capital.

Heh!

Ma Qiao realized that the real Penguin hadn't had a smooth start either. At one point, even Brother Ma had personally pretended to be a female customer service representative to attract users.

The Big Bird Brand Den Den Mushi would probably have a start full of hardships and setbacks too.

Besides, he really did come from an "ordinary family" and would have to truly build everything from scratch.

Still, Ma Qiao didn't think he would have it so bad that he'd need to pretend to be a female customer service representative.

There was no way he was going to cross-dress.

Not in this lifetime.

After all, the mistakes of those who went before served as lessons for those who followed.

He might have oversimplified things before.

Ma Qiao thought he might need to consider a plan for initial promotion and testing.