Rules in Ruins! Schrodinger's Referee, Deadpool!
"Beep!!"
All eyes were on the center circle!
Just as Sing Sing was about to pass the ball to Chan Ka-kui, Deadpool suddenly pulled a large red megaphone out of his crotch.
"Attention all!!"
"The great Coach Wade announces the first special rule of the game!"
"From now on, no ordinary passes with your feet are allowed! You can only use your abilities! Anyone who dares to pass with their feet, this judge will send them flying with an RPG!"
Sing Sing's outstretched foot was suspended in mid-air.
Damn it!
This bastard really thinks he's on his home turf?!
Are you trying to mess with me?!
Before Sing Sing could even unleash his fury, the visiting team's Mutants were already ecstatic!
"Quack!"
With a strange cry, Lao Mo, the Toad, leaned forward, his hunched body looming over Sing Sing's feet with his extremely long tongue covered in barbs.
"Whoosh!"
He curled his tongue around the soccer ball and pulled it back, then swung it in an exaggerated arc in mid-air, sending the ball flying directly into the Kung Fu Team's half!
"Take off!"
In mid-air, Luke Shaw, Mayfly had just completed the sixth stage of cybernetic transformation, unfurled his carbon fiber and steel wings!
A Spectrum bionic eye locks onto the trajectory of the eyeball!
He flipped his entire body in mid-air and headed the ball as it flew like a cannonball!
Bang!!
The steel forehead slammed into the soccer ball, sending it hurtling towards the corner of the goal.
Yan Shuangying was still striking a pose when he watched the ball go into the net.
Goal!
1-0!
"Pretty!!"
"Just ten seconds into the game! The Starfire Mutants United has taken the lead!!"
"Lao Mo's tongue is practically a guided missile with a built-in 8x scope!!"
"Luke's Cyber Assault is pure violent aesthetics!!"
"Commentator Zhang, what do you think of this rule that prohibits passing the ball with your feet?"
"Hehe... this referee is really something! He turned the football match into a superpower brawl! The Kung Fu Team is in for trouble now!"
The live stream chat exploded with a dense barrage of comments:
"Holy crap! You can play like that?! Is this even football?!"
"Lao Mo's tongue is amazing! 'About how I used my tongue to execute a De Bruyne-style through ball!'"
"That ball speed canceled out the goalkeeper's save animation; Luke's a header monster!"
"Li Zhi, you son of a bitch! I bet on the Kung Fu Team to win with the handicap, and they messed up right from the start!"
"Master Yan: I bet there were no bullets in your ball. Turns out there really were!"
"Hey buddy up, let's go to the rooftop. The Mutants United's prestige speaks for itself, right?"
Sing Sing stood in the center circle, his face darkening.
Playing with superpowers, huh?
OK!
The ball is restarted.
Deadpool was dangling an AK at the sidelines, his eyes narrowed into slits behind his mask as he stared expectantly at Sing Sing.
Chan Ka-kui tossed the ball in front of Sing Sing.
Sing Sing didn't catch it with his foot!
He bent his knees and lowered his waist, his eyes wide open, and stomped his right foot on the grass!
"Thump!!"
The entire center circle of grass shook the ball so hard it bounced high into the air!
The ball was hovering in mid-air!
Sing Sing tensed his calf muscles and unleashed a powerful volley at the ball!
Smoke!
Collapse!
"Bang!!"
The ball, accompanied by a white shockwave, hurtled rapidly towards the opposite goal!
The guard at the Geggebu was so frightened that his pinkish biological paraffin body trembled violently, and he instinctively ducked.
The ball grazed his translucent skull and slammed into the goal!
1-1! Tied out!!
"It's in! It...!"
Sing Sing!!
"Oh my god!!"
"That volley was incredibly powerful!"
"Using internal energy to lift the ball up—is this the mark of a national-level special agent?!"
Sing Sing landed, casually tossed his hair, and pointed at Deadpool, raising his chin provocatively.
Deadpool wasn't angry at all; instead, he rubbed his hands together excitedly.
"Beep!!"
The whistle blows!
"A second rule has been added!!"
Deadpool pulled out a pair of giant sunglasses from somewhere, put them on, and wiggled his hips while shouting, "Goals must be celebrated with a dance! A goal without a celebration dance is penalized with a point deduction!"
Is this even possible?!
The game continued, and Chan Ka-kui received a pass from Yang Liqing in the attacking third, and slammed the ball into the net with a parkour-style bicycle kick!
He just scored, and hadn't even had a chance to roar in celebration.
Deadpool shoved an AK-47 into his face. "Dance! Now! Get moving! A striptease is fine too!"
Chan Ka-kui glared, his big nose bulging, his face flushed red. "Screw you! I'm from the Serious Crimes Unit!"
Why is a tough guy like him wiggling his butt here?
It would be better to kill him!
Deadpool promptly made a big X with both hands in front of his chest!
"Violation! Goal disallowed! Not only disallowed, but a point will be deducted!!"
On the scoreboard, the Kung Fu Team's score went from 2 to 0!
The score is now 0-1!
"Damn you!!"
Sing Sing flushed red, and he pointed at Deadpool, cursing loudly.
That biased whistle was enough to warrant a ten-minute execution in the old society!
Before the Kung Fu Team could even react, the Mutants United had already started racking up points like crazy!
Storm Ororo floated in mid-air, her long, silver-white hair dancing wildly in the wind!
Her eyes flashed with a terrifying white light, and a black thundercloud gathered in the clear blue stadium!
"Boom!"
The powerful electrostatic magnetic field directly enveloped the ball.
The ball slowly drifted through the air across most of the field and went straight into the goal guarded by Yan Shuangying!
After scoring, Ororo landed slowly, his body swaying.
"Ouch! My sister stepped on me!!"
"Those long legs! That presence!"
"How to Legally Cheat on the Sports Field by Controlling the Weather Bureau Chief"
"The Kung Fu Team is deflated! They've been completely ruined by the rules!"
Director Wang on the sidelines couldn't hold back any longer!
The thermos was smashed on the ground, spilling goji berries all over the floor.
"This is outrageous! Charge in with all your forces! Don't give them a chance to breathe!"
Director Wang pointed at the field. "Xiao Yan! Teach them some manners!"
With a cold face, Shi Xiaoyan walked to the front without saying a word.
The ball fell from the sky, and she calmly untied the paper umbrella from her back.
She completely disregarded the rules of football and treated this like a golf course!
With a twist of his waist and hips, the red umbrella struck the bottom of the ball!
Bang!!
The ball was deflected by the tip of the umbrella in a bizarre "outer foot arc cross" trajectory!
He flew past three defenders in mid-air and into the top corner of the goal!
After scoring, Shi Xiaoyan opened her red umbrella expressionlessly and spun around twice on the spot, as if she were dancing.
Deadpool reluctantly gave a thumbs-up. "You pass!"
The match has completely entered an unrestricted free-for-all mode!
Silver Fox Sif used all the top agent's infiltration skills in the restricted area!
She astutely observed the Ma Jun's defensive route and positioned herself in advance.
As soon as Ma Jun approached, she screamed without hesitation, rolled three and a half times on the grass as if she had been electrocuted, and even realistically spat out a mouthful of blood from who-knows-where!
Staged accident?!
The Ma Jun were stunned.
"Beep beep--!"
Deadpool blew his whistle wildly, pointing to the penalty spot. "Penalty!! Maliciously fouled!! Yellow card!!"
Positioning and creating opportunities!
He fooled the opponent into giving him a penalty kick with exceptional smoothness!
Li Qianhuan blew Ling Lingwu into a mess, Yang Liqing choked Daken, and Hong Wubi and Colossus fought back fiercely.
One-armed Li Ding'an chased after the Mayfly with a knife, while Yang Jianhua and Polaris pulled each other's hair.
The score started to go back and forth wildly!
3-3!
5-5!
8-8!
The stadium can no longer be called a stadium.
The Riptide transformed into a purple tornado, instantly lifting Chan Ka-kui and Hong Wubi into the air, preventing them from descending.
Polaris coldly manipulated Colossus's mechanical arm, swinging him around like a windmill to smash people.
Sing Sing, using his Divine Movement, Hundred Transformations and Ever-Changing move, repeatedly outmaneuvered three defenders with his Great Strength Vajra Legs. After each goal, he was forced to perform an extremely abstract Michael Jackson moonwalk combined with a hip thrust.
"10-10!!!"
"The first half isn't even over yet, and the score is already an absurd 10-10!!"
"This is no longer football, this is Ragnarok!!"
At this crucial moment, Deadpool felt it wasn't exciting enough.
Laughing wildly, he pulled a handful of banana peels and anti-personnel mines from his dimensional pocket and threw them wildly onto the field like a shower of flowers!
"Add some spice! Add some spice! Let the storm rage on!"
Just as Sing Sing was about to shoot, he slipped and stepped on a banana peel.
He flew sideways, and with a Deadly Scissor Legs, he tackled Daken, who had just received the ball, to the ground!
Sing Sing got up from the grass, spat out the mud in his mouth, and stared at Li Qianhuan, who was dangling a ball outside the penalty area.
There's one minute left in the first half...
If we don't show them our real skills, these foreigners will really think our Kung Fu Team is pushovers!