Yacht Party

"This treadmill can reach a top speed of 800 kilometers per hour. It automatically adjusts when you speed up or slow down, and it doesn't make a sound. No exaggeration, give me enough materials, and I could make a high-speed train run in place on a treadmill." Thanks to Dongfang Bubai's—oh, no, Tony Stark's—formidable hands-on skills, a pile of materials Xia Yu couldn't make sense of was quickly assembled into a ten-meter-long treadmill. Tony had been practicing the simplified Yijin Jing with Xia Yu these past few days, enduring all manner of jabs and criticism from him. Now that he was finally in his element, he had to show off a little.

"Why did you make it so long?" Xia Yu asked curiously.

"It gives you some room in case you suddenly accelerate, idiot," Tony said without looking up. He was busy assembling a machine to test strength.

Top speed: 231 kilometers per hour; acceleration from zero to 100 kilometers per hour: 0.7 seconds

Standing jump height: 21.3 meters (tested outside the house)

Right punch force: 3.12 tons

Left punch force: 3.07 tons

Apart from his speed, the measurements were all taken without the aid of Internal Energy. Having practiced the first three levels of the Dragon Elephant Prajna Skill, Xia Yu could go head-to-head with genetically enhanced heroes like Captain America and the Winter Soldier even without using Internal Energy.

Unfortunately, Tony's equipment could only detect the enormous energy inside Xia Yu's body. It couldn't detect the path or intensity of his Internal Energy at all. As JARVIS put it, "Sir, I cannot detect the meridians and acupoints you mentioned at all. Does the human body have such organs?"

Once the preliminary measurements were done, Tony eagerly asked Xia Yu when he would reach the same level. Xia Yu gave a wry smile and told him that all his Internal Energy had been given to him by his grandfather before he died. As for his physical strength, that cultivation method had to be practiced from childhood; they could talk about it after Tony mastered the six diagrams.

The blow sent Tony straight into his laboratory. He refused to believe he couldn't detect the human body's acupoints and meridians. He firmly believed science could provide the ultimate explanation, and he thought that once he uncovered the secrets of meridians and acupoints, he could quickly master the secret of how the human body absorbed and stored energy.

Xia Yu could only respond with a wry smile. Just as even the greatest doctor in the world couldn't understand even the simplest theories behind foot massage in Huaxia culture, martial arts needed some idealistic concepts to support them to a certain extent. For example, Xia Yu had tried teaching Tony and Pepper Potts the most basic seated meditation and qi cultivation, such as sinking qi into the dantian and imagining a stream of qi moving through the body. They simply couldn't do it.

It was better to let Tony Stark focus on practicing the simplified Yijin Jing. What the system had specially designed was what suited him. For the next while, Xia Yu focused on helping Tony restore and strengthen his manhood. In truth, Tony would have been perfectly fine just practicing the Yijin Jing, but he was fixated on his December date with the twins, and he didn't have a cultivation cheat like Xia Yu's. He had no choice but to trouble Xia Yu to use Internal Energy to nourish his offal every day. Yes, that was what Xia Yu called it in his mind: offal.

After nourishing Tony's offal every day, Xia Yu finally received a notification from the system and happily collected ten thousand points. Wanting to buy the fourth level of the Dragon Elephant Prajna Skill, Xia Yu discovered to his dismay that he could only buy three levels together. He had no choice but to wait for the system to issue another mission.

After being told his treatment was over, Tony cheered and shouted that he wanted to throw a party. So he maliciously arranged a business trip for Pepper Potts through the company. Although they weren't officially together yet, Xia Yu's butterfly effect had already made things ambiguous between them. Tony was already a little afraid to sleep with girls and leave Pepper Potts to clean up after him like he used to.

The business trip had originally required Tony to attend, but Xia Yu shamelessly lied to Pepper Potts, saying that Tony was at a critical moment and so on. After tricking her into leaving, Tony declared that he would give Xia Yu a taste of a luxurious yacht party. Xia Yu scoffed. Even if he'd never been to one, hadn't he seen movies? In his previous life, Xia Yu had watched countless bad online movies, and he'd seen more than enough of their three essential ingredients: yachts, beauties, and big boobs.

"You're so tacky. Taking a boat out to sea with a bunch of beauties in bikinis lying around sunbathing—what's so fun about that?" Xia Yu said disdainfully to Tony.

As it turned out, Xia Yu slapped his own face harder than Tony ate hot pot.

"Is this a fucking yacht? It's a villa on the sea!" Xia Yu said, standing on the shore at a yacht club in Los Angeles and staring at the 120-meter-long behemoth on the water.

Tony burst out laughing and put an arm around Xia Yu as he led him onto the yacht.

This was what it meant for poverty to limit one's imagination. The yacht had three decks above and another two levels inside the hull, with five suites and ten standard twin rooms. Its luxury exceeded Xia Yu's imagination. There were three swimming pools alone. Damn it, this was a yacht, not a cruise ship! There was one dance floor, and five movie theaters, gyms, dining rooms, medical rooms, and lounges; Tony Stark made Xia Yu instantly understand how Granny Liu had felt visiting the Grand View Garden.

Wearing a smug expression, Tony took Xia Yu on a complete tour. Then he brought him to the top deck, poured a glass of red wine, and handed it to Xia Yu. "My friend, the main attraction hasn't arrived yet. We'll set sail when the girls get here."

Xia Yu looked at Tony and said very seriously, "Tony, now I know why so many people hate you. I really want to slap you to death right now."

Tony laughed heartily. He loved seeing Xia Yu at a loss, and he provoked him again. "I had this yacht custom-built in Germany. It cost me 800 million dollars. Actually, I wanted to build a small island at sea, but it would have taken too long, and I couldn't wait."

"I want to beat you to death even more now. You're making me feel utterly poor," Xia Yu said, looking at the more than 100 million dollars in his Space Ring. (He had found time to count it a while ago.)

Tony Stark intended to make Xia Yu's jaw drop clean off today. Looking toward the shore, he said to Xia Yu, "Stand up, buddy. Let's welcome the girls."

Xia Yu stood up and looked toward the shore, nearly dropping the wineglass in his hand on his own foot.

Three buses slowly pulled up beside the yacht. That was right, the kind used for tours. The doors opened, and beauties of every skin color stepped out, all dressed in bikinis. Yes, Tony Stark, that damned capitalist, had brought beauties over by the busload—three busloads at once.

Once all the beauties were aboard, the crew came out one after another to set out food and drinks. A DJ booth was placed at the very front of the deck where the two men stood. Tony had hired the best DJ in the entire western United States.

By then, it had grown dark. After the yacht had been sailing slowly for more than ten minutes, a great many fireworks shot into the sky from the stern. The cheers of the beauties rang out all over the yacht. Tony picked up the microphone at the DJ booth and announced loudly, "The party starts now! Have fun, girls!"

Right on cue, the DJ started spinning records and playing music, and the entire yacht became a sea of merriment.