This Episode Is Amazing

"Anyone who closes their eyes is gay."

The voice sounded in Calcharo's ear like a devil's whisper.

"You're gay. All of you are gay."

Calcharo couldn't take it anymore. He could accept people calling him bad at games, and he could accept people calling him a washed-up old man, but he couldn't accept people calling him gay, just as he refused to admit he was weak.

No, that wasn't right. He wasn't weak at all.

"Can't help it. We kept calling you, and you wouldn't get up."

Wuling chuckled as he played with Calcharo's sleep-mussed hair.

"Couldn't you just bring me breakfast? It's right on your way, isn't it? Did you really have to wake me up?"

Calcharo swatted away the hand Wuling was using to mess with his hair.

"I stayed up a little late last night. I really don't have the energy right now, so please bring me some~, I'm begging you~."

His cutesy voice was met only with silence and Wuling's outstretched hand.

"Urgh." (Hit sound effect.)

Calcharo rubbed his aching head. A closer look revealed a small red mark on it.

"Serves you right. Who told you to ask me to bring you coffee so late at night? I warned you, but you insisted on drinking it."

"I was afraid I'd get sleepy playing games at night. Ah, how was I supposed to know it'd turn out like this?"

"But even with the coffee, you only stayed up until one in the morning."

Lingyang spoke from below, his face expressionless.

"You drank coffee and still only made it to one. No, maybe you didn't even make it to one. Calcharo, you're pathetic."

Wuling looked at Calcharo with a hint of pity.

"? What do you mean?"

"You're weak. You're a weakling now."

"Maka..."

"Ah~~~, I'm so sleepy I could die."

Calcharo yawned, his head still a little foggy, as if he'd only booted up halfway.

It was eight in the morning. Normally, the paths should have been full of people, but clearly, that rule didn't apply on weekends.

Eight was late for a weekday, but far too early for a weekend. Most people were still asleep at this hour.

Wuling and the other two walked all the way from the dorm to the cafeteria, and they didn't even see ten people along the way.

There would probably be more people around nine, since breakfast was only served until nine thirty, while lunch wouldn't go on sale until around ten thirty.

After buying breakfast, they found a nearby table and sat down, eating while looking at their phones.

Wuling was planning to check the campus forum, but before he could tap it, a group invitation popped up.

Nabomo invited you to join the group chat "Star Society."

Wuling suddenly remembered that after he joined the club, Nabomo had said she'd add him to its group chat. For some reason, she'd only gotten around to it now. Wuling hadn't remembered either, so he didn't ask.

Nabomo: Sorry, junior. I went back to sleep earlier and forgot when I woke up. I only just remembered.

Nabomo: Whatever you do, don't tell them about this once you're in, or they'll make fun of me again.

Nabomo: Please, junior.

OK, verdict's in. This president really is unreliable. No wonder the club nearly disbanded.

Wuling didn't reply to her. Instead, he opened the group chat and sent a request to join.

Group entry question: Who is the most gentle, adorable, beautiful, considerate, wise, understanding, reasonable, honorable, magnanimous, talented, calm and composed president in the world, unparalleled and irreplaceable?

Wuling: ...

Subway, old man, phone.

Wuling felt that if not for the character limit, Nabomo could have copied every word in the book into it.

What normal person makes that their group entry question? And how is the president a narcissist too?

Despite his complaints, Wuling obediently wrote Nabomo's name in the answer field.

Notice: Incorrect answer.

Wuling: ?

What the heck? How could that be wrong? Would that narcissist really put someone else's name?

Wuling didn't know, but he was deeply shocked.

Wuling: What's the group entry question?

Nabomo: Huh? You don't know?

Wuling: You never told me. How could I possibly know?

Nabomo: Oh, oh, I see. Sorry, junior.

Wuling: ...

Nabomo: The answer is the founder of our Star Society, the first president of the Star Society, the gentlest person at Star Torch Academy, the golden sun.

Wuling: There's not enough room here for that many people.

Nabomo: All those titles belong to one person, and that's Lady Phoebe!

Whoa, why does this suddenly feel so hype?

Wuling: But you said before that you founded the Star Society yourself.

Nabomo: Ah, did I? I must have still been half-asleep and said the wrong thing. I only took over.

Nabomo: Anyway, you'll learn about Lady Phoebe in time. I'll tell you later.

Wuling stared at that long string of lofty titles on the screen, his fingertip hovering over the text box. For a moment, he didn't know what expression to make.

So that whole long string of flattering adjectives hadn't been describing Nabomo herself.

He reopened the group application page and typed in Phoebe's name.

Notice: Incorrect input.

He tried again, typing Lady Phoebe.

This time, no red incorrect-answer notice appeared.

The page changed, and his application was successfully submitted.

This episode is amazing.

In less than a second, his application was approved.

Notice: Rover joined the group chat.

Assassinating the Novelist: A newbie?

Braised Sheep Head: Welcome, new member.

Siberian She-Monkey Sneaks Into Grandpa Bull's Black Stockings: Another one the president lured back? Nabomo, stop poaching freshmen everywhere.

Call Me Madam President: What do you mean, poaching! I have an eye for talent!!

Call Me Madam President: Our new junior is here. Everyone, applaud.

A jumble of stickers immediately flooded the screen.

Wuling roughly counted the people who had spoken. There were eleven in total. The remaining eight probably hadn't woken up because it was still early.

Wuling watched the chat scroll by. His finger paused, and after considering his words, he sent a message.

Rover: Hello, everyone. New member reporting in.

The group went quiet for a brief moment as soon as the message went out.

The next second, another flood of messages began.

I Am a Name: Oh, you're really in.

Agile Mountain Dog: Hi, newbie. A word of warning: don't believe the president's grand promises too easily.

Tomato Impact: Don't go out wandering at midnight with the president.

My Sword and Shield: Don't accompany the president when she challenges the wild trails on the academy's back mountain.

The warnings popped up one after another, making the corner of Wuling's eye twitch slightly.

Call Me Madam President: Hey, hey, hey! Don't slander me in front of the newbie! I just enjoy an adventure now and then!

Wuling silently committed those messages to memory.

Enjoys adventure, which is pretty much the same as occasionally courting death.

It really was a bit unlucky to be stuck with a president like that. He had no idea how she'd become president in the first place.

Call Me Madam President: Junior, we have a welcome activity at two this afternoon. Don't worry, it's just for fun. If you have time, you can come give it a try and get acquainted with everyone.

Wuling thought it over. He had nothing to do that day before six in the evening, and he didn't work at the coffee shop on Saturdays, so he simply agreed.