Emperor grumbled to himself as he took the tablet and tapped on the video.
Then Emperor fell into a metro-elderly-phone-using expression.
"Indescribable Penguin shrieks*Longmen Curses*Yanmen Curses"
After finishing the video, Emperor let out a string of age-inappropriate phrases and almost dropped the tablet in his hand.
Isv sat quietly to the side, watching his boss's frantic appearance.
It was super stress-relieving.
"Hah... hah... This kid is this fierce? Is there a record of that ability of his?"
After cursing for a long stretch, Emperor caught his breath slightly and asked Isv for the other files.
He wanted to see what on earth this guy's ability was.
51 Hurry Hurry Hurry Hurry Hurry
Penguin Logistics, dormitory.
"It's here, it's here, Crazy Thursday is here!"
Standing at the door, Exusiai shouted loudly while carrying a large bag.
"Go on in."
Behind her, Texas gave a light push to Exusiai, who was blocking the doorway, and slipped in through the gap at the side.
"Exu, you're too fat, you're taking up the whole doorway."
Croissant, who was behind, bumped Exusiai with the top of her head.
"My back! Croissant, your horns poked me!"
With her back poked by Croissant's horns, Exusiai felt as though a hole had been poked in her spine.
"Um... has Shirou already tidied everything up?"
Following the path Croissant cleared, Sora also walked into the living room.
The living room had already been tidied up. Having experienced the fried-food party last time, Shirou pretty much knew the girls liked to party over by the sofa, so this time he specially brought a few small chairs and placed them next to the sofa.
"Wait, where is Shirou, though?"
Exusiai placed the bag in her hand onto the table, but there was no sign of Shirou anywhere around.
"What is it?"
Shirou walked out of the kitchen; it seemed he had just heard Exusiai calling him.
He had bought some fruit when he came back, and he was just cutting it up, putting it on a platter, and placing it in the fridge so they could eat some cool fruit to cut through the grease after finishing the fried food later.
"Just wanted to ask how your test went today."
Exusiai wore the expression of an onlooker eager for gossip.
"It should be pretty good, I suppose? Isv said he'll send the details to me later, so I'll let you all see it then."
As for Exusiai's curiosity, Shirou just let her be; they were all part of the same team anyway.
"I've got high hopes for you, you know!"
Beside him, Croissant patted Shirou on the shoulder and extended her left thumb.
"Go wash your hands."
Swatting Croissant's hand away, Shirou told the girls to go wash their hands first while he neatly arranged the fried food they brought back onto the table.
When the girls came back after washing their hands, they saw that Shirou had already filled the table and set out the drinks.
And all they had to do was eat.
"Ah, life is way too comfortable like this."
Exusiai sat in her seat, sighing over a lifestyle where she was taken care of every day until she was getting somewhat decadent, and then picked up a sweet egg tart to jump-start her appetite.
As a Sarkaz, taking sweets as a staple food was completely reasonable.
The girls at the side also successively found seats and picked up the food they wanted to enjoy.
Croissant and Texas grabbed fried chicken and immediately started gnawing on it, while Sora sensibly took a few French fries and a burger; eating those was enough for her.
What Shirou took was similar to Sora's; fried chicken and the like could be left to the carnivorous trio to solve.
The meat character embroidered on the front of Croissant's shirt was enough to show just how deep her love for meat was.
"Hurry, hurry, hurry, hurry, hurry, why is Isv so slow?"
Having polished off most of the fried food on the table, the girls began to chat idly.
Spearheaded by Exusiai, they started complaining that Isv was much too slow!
Their own scores had been released immediately back then, so why was it taking so long for Shirou's?
It had to be Isv loafing on the job!
"Are you really that eager to see Shirou's scores?"
Texas chewed on a chicken drumstick bone; as for Shirou's scores, she was relatively aloof about them.
She only had a tiny bit—just that tiny bit of curiosity.
"Exu must be worried someone's gonna steal her sniper spot, so she wants to suppress him first! Hero Shirou, quickly use your invincible meat-pie to suppress Exusiai!"
Croissant pointed at Exusiai with the expression of someone who had seen right through her opponent.
"Croissant, are you a demon?"
Sora couldn't even listen to that anymore; making Exusiai eat a meat pie or something was simply too cruel.
"A savory apple pie?"
Shirou offered a compromise.
"That's even more vicious than a meat pie, strawberry Mapo Tofu, and pineapple pizza combined! Shirou, you absolutely must not make that kind of dark cuisine!"
Exusiai cracked, attempting to salvage the innocent Shirou from earlier.
"No, no, you can rest easy on that score."
Seeing Exusiai looking like she was about to cry, Shirou hurriedly comforted her.
"Th—that apple pie..."
Exusiai wore a look of hopeful anticipation.
"Maybe next time."
Seeing Exusiai push her luck, Shirou dismissed her.
Ding
Shirou's phone chimed; out of everyone in Penguin Logistics, only his phone used this sort of older notification sound.
According to him, it was just because he was more used to this kind.
"It's here, it's here, it's here! Isv! My superman!"
Exusiai took Shirou's phone, finally arriving at her happiest moment.
Then, scrolling down, the expression on her face turned somewhat strange.
"Why the look like you just saw the boss dancing ballet? Let me see!"
Seeing Exusiai's metro-elderly expression, Croissant curiously crowded over.
"...Combat skill is Outstanding?"
A multitude of question marks appeared above Croissant's head; among them, Exusiai and Texas, who were the best fighters, only ranked as Proficient, so how did an Outstanding suddenly pop up?
Sure enough, the TV hadn't lied to her! The truly formidable bosses were always those cooks or janitors!
"???"
Texas and Sora crowded over as well.
"Originium Arts adaptability is Flawed... meaning you achieved an Outstanding score relying purely on your physical body, Shirou?"
Texas read all the way down, and as one of the main combatants, she naturally understood the true weight of Shirou's "Outstanding" rating.
"Wait, doesn't Shirou have Originium Arts? How can it be Flawed?"
Sora still remembered last time when Shirou made the tissue paper's material hardened; that ought to have been a kind of Originium Arts, but the "Flawed" rating above left Sora feeling bewildered.
"It's a long story... Anyway, it seems I can't trigger Originium Arts."
Shirou answered from the side, explaining that he had tried to activate it with magic afterward, but it seemed completely useless.
A staff in his hand was just like a plain stick, and it was the same later when Isv took out other types of Originium weapons.
"Exusiai, stop zoning out, scroll down and take a look."
Pumping Exusiai's dropped jaw back up, Croissant urged her.
"Let me see... adaptable positions are Guard, Sniper, and Caster? We have a Caster? We have a Caster!"
Seeing the word Caster, Exusiai cheered.
"And this evaluation..."
Compared to position adaptability, Texas paid more attention to Isv's evaluation of Shirou.
Evaluation: Shirou's ability is less of an Originium Arts and more of an unknown technique, hereafter temporarily referred to as an "ability."
The ability possessed by Shirou can be used for both close combat and ranged attacks, and his personal combat awareness is extremely high. In this simulation test, he annihilated all test machines—including the supplementary drones—while suffering almost no damage.
Furthermore, Shirou's ability is extremely special, but precisely because of this, Shirou seems unable to trigger staves and other Originium products; however, I believe Shirou's own abilities are sufficient to make up for this shortcoming.
The following data has been redacted; please contact Penguin Logistics if necessary.
52 I Have a Huge Business Deal (Revised)
Seeing the final "please contact Penguin Logistics," the girls almost smashed the phones in their hands.
Fortunately, Shirou hastily stopped them, and his phone managed to avoid surviving for only a month.
"There's no need to smash the phone... phones are very expensive, you know."
Shirou carefully put his phone away and lectured the lot of them.
"Sorry, sorry, acted on impulse for a moment there."
Sora said, and the other girls also apologized to Shirou with sincere expressions on their faces.
"After all, seeing it cut off right at the climax like that is really infuriating."
Croissant, who had almost smashed the phone flat with a punch just a moment ago, said.
"It's like opening a box of Pocky and finding every single piece snapped."
Texas, who had almost cleaved the phone in two with a blade just a moment ago, said.
"It's like looking inside an apple pie and finding no apples, only apple jam."
Exusiai, who had almost blown a hole in the phone with her gun just a moment ago, said.
"Croissant and Texas's comparisons barely pass, but Exusiai, what you said sounds like you just encountered something that annoyed you, pure and simple, right?"
With a single knife-hand strike, Shirou chopped down on Exusiai's head and spoke.
"Ow, wah, Shirou, are you targeting me?!"
Cradling the spot that had taken the chop, Exusiai complained, feeling as though Shirou always singled her and Croissant out to make an example of, especially her.
"Before you feel like I'm targeting you, shouldn't you reflect on yourself first?"
Pressing both fists against the left and right sides of Exusiai's head, Shirou applied a little pressure.
"I was wrong, I was wrong, it's my fault, my head's about to flatten out, let go already, aaah!"
Feeling the pressure from both sides of her head, Exusiai hurriedly surrendered.
"If you don't court death, you won't die; how come you never understand that, Exu?"
Before you continue