"Mario... oh, no, Mario Bros."
A Yin clicked into the game details page.
Beside the crude, regrettable cover art was the game information—
Game Title: Mario Bros.
Developer: Golden Wind
Genre: Side-scrolling platformer
Price: 2 yuan
"This art style..."
A Yin stared at the upright cat with its smug grin for a moment, then couldn't help laughing.
"What the hell is this piece of crap? No wonder it only costs two yuan."
As he spoke, A Yin clicked purchase and added "Mario Bros." to his library.
At the same time, the bizarre game cover had the barrage cracking up—
'What the hell kind of game is this?'
'It looks way too crude.'
'This art style, hahahahaha, barely a step above stick figures.'
'But this cat really does look so smug...'
'Isn't this just a Mario reskin? What a scam.'
'Getting fed shit right from the start, as usual.'
'The creator probably set the price low on purpose. It's only two yuan, so players probably can't be bothered to refund it.'
'Shady cash grab. I'm ready to report it.'
'This counts as a game?'
'...'
The game was tiny. In the blink of an eye, A Yin had finished downloading and installing it.
Looking at the barrage, A Yin secretly shook his head. His thoughts were much the same as the comments.
"We'll try it out for a bit. If it's just a straight-up scam, we won't even play for twenty minutes. Everyone can leave a report, and we'll carry it off."
With that, A Yin opened the game.
The game screen appeared.
Even cruder, rougher graphics than Mario filled the screen.
Oval clouds, square bricks, rectangular pipes, perfectly round uncolored enemies...
A Yin was speechless.
"This is a bit too much, isn't it?"
"I'm not asking a two-yuan game to look amazing, but at least don't use the system's built-in drawing software to design it!"
This piece of junk!
He could make it himself!
"And isn't this just Mario?! Even the level is exactly the same! I could clear this with my eyes closed!"
As he spoke, A Yin started the game.
He controlled the smug-looking, bizarre little cat forward a few steps while explaining as he went.
"Go forward, hey, jump here, stomp this little enemy, hit the question-mark block ahead, and there'll be a coin—"
As he spoke, A Yin controlled the smug cat to jump and hit the block.
However.
Diu—
A smug little sound effect rang out.
The block that should have popped out a coin actually moved up one square right before everyone's eyes!
"Huh?"
A Yin froze and instinctively held down the jump button.
Diu—
Another sound effect rang out, and the question-mark block flew even higher.
"What the fuck?"
A Yin finally realized something was wrong.
"Why won't it let me hit it?"
Seeing this, the viewers in the livestream also seemed to realize that this game might actually have something to it—
'Hahahahaha, I've lived this long, and this is the first time I've seen a block that runs away on its own.'
'Block: Get lost! Stay away from me!'
'Hahahahaha, it's so disgusted.'
'"I could clear this with my eyes closed."'
'This actually seems kind of interesting.'
'So damn smug...'
After trying to jump twice more, A Yin watched the block dodge higher and higher. With no hope of getting the coin, he gave up.
"Forget it, forget it. It's just a coin. If I can't eat it, I can't eat it. There's a mushroom up ahead."
As he spoke, A Yin continued forward and successfully hit the second question-mark block.
Ding dong!
As the sound effect played, the mushroom A Yin remembered appeared and slid down along a row of bricks.
A Yin had already run beneath the bricks, ready to eat the mushroom and grow bigger.
At the same time, he didn't forget to boast. "I really can clear this game with my eyes closed. See that? I've practically memorized the level—"
Before he could finish!
The purple mushroom slid down the bricks.
It landed squarely on Mario Bros.' head.
Then!
The Mario Bros. controlled by A Yin gave a tiny jump on the spot and died instantly!
At the same time, a final message popped up over its head—
This mushroom... is poisonous...
After a brief moment of stunned confusion, A Yin was completely shocked!
"What? Huh? I've played Super Mario for over twenty years, and no one ever fucking told me mushrooms were poisonous!!!"
Clearly!
This absurd death not only shocked A Yin, but also had the viewers roaring with laughter!
'He died from eating a mushroom, hahahahaha.'
'Mario would laugh at you for the rest of your life.'
'That's way too fucking ridiculous, hahahahahaha.'
'Young people really are healthy. They can lie down and fall asleep instantly.'
'It scared the boss so much his Jinmen accent came out, hahahahaha.'
'Cause of death: I've memorized the level.'
'The final words are killing me too.'
'This game is poisonous, hahahahahaha...'
Only then!
From streamer A Yin to the viewers in the barrage, they truly realized this game was far from simple!
On the surface, its level design seemed identical to Mario.
But danger lurked everywhere, and every step could lead to an unexpected trap!
A Yin took a deep breath, glanced at the cheerful glow-stick gifts filling the screen, and steadied himself.
"Ah—damn it! Got it, got it! This game is kind of provoking me now!"
"Damn it, you want to play dirty with me? Fine!"
With that!
A Yin sat up straight, flexed his fingers, and gripped the controller tightly!
"I'm a dual-platform PC and VR-pod streamer. You think you can hold me down?!"
Rallying himself!
A Yin restarted Mario Bros.!
The first coin block? He didn't want it!
The mushroom from the block was poisonous? He wouldn't eat it!
By sheer luck, A Yin even avoided the flying fish enemy that suddenly shot out of the first pipe!
"...Damn! See that? That's what Number One in Jinmen means!"
A Yin patted his chest.
"Hey, with that reaction just now, wouldn't anyone have to say, 'Fine moves, young hero!'"
Feeling rather pleased with himself, A Yin gave a small jump, stomped an enemy to death, and arrived beneath the second pipe.
After testing it a couple of times, A Yin confirmed that no more flying fish would emerge from this pipe.
He couldn't help chuckling.
"You can tell whether a designer understands Super Mario just by looking at a pipe like this."
"Because old players all know this pipe should lead to a hidden room."
"Let's give it a try."
As he spoke, A Yin stood on the pipe opening and pressed down on the directional pad.
Sure enough!
After a brief pause, Mario Bros. gradually entered the pipe.
A Yin nodded approvingly. "Not bad. Remembering this hidden stage shows that this designer..."
Before he could finish!
Suddenly!
The pipe began shaking in place!
As the shaking grew more violent, everyone stared in utter disbelief as raging flames burst from the bottom of the pipe!
Then came a thunderous rumble.
The pipe transformed directly into a rocket, shooting into the sky and carrying Mario Bros. upward until it became a tiny star!
Lives: -1
A Yin: ...
"That just proves this fucking designer is insane!!!"
Bang!
The scene before him was so absurd that A Yin slapped the table on the spot!
"Cinema taught you to make games like this?!"
Before you continue