Cinema Teaches You How to Make Games!

"Mario... oh wait, Mario Bros."

A Yin clicked into the game's detail page.

There, beside the disappointingly sloppy cover, was the game info—

Game Name: Mario Bros.

Developer: Golden Wind

Genre: Side-scrolling platformer

Price: 2 yuan

"This art style..."

A Yin stared for a moment at the upright-walking cat with that perpetually smug grin, then couldn't help but laugh out loud:

"What the hell is this piece of crap? No wonder it's only two yuan."

With that, A Yin clicked purchase and added "Mario Bros." to his library.

Meanwhile, the barrage comments were already cracking up at the bizarre game cover—

'What kind of game is this'

'Looks way too sloppy'

'This art style hahahaha, barely a step up from stick figures'

'But that cat really does look so smug...'

'Isn't this just a reskinned Mario? A cash grab, right?'

'Classic bait-and-switch'

'Bet the dev set the price low on purpose—since it's only two yuan, players probably won't bother refunding'

'Scummy tactic, already planning to report'

'This counts as a game?'

'...'

The game was tiny—almost in the blink of an eye, A Yin had finished downloading and installing it.

Glancing at the barrage, A Yin shook his head to himself, his thoughts pretty much matching the comments:

"Let's give it a quick try. If this is purely a scam, we won't bother playing for twenty minutes. Everyone leave a report, and we'll move on."

With that, A Yin opened the game.

The game screen appeared.

Even rougher and more slapdash than Mario's sprites filled the screen.

Oval clouds, square bricks, rectangular pipes, standard circles for enemies that weren't even colored in...

A Yin was speechless:

"This is a bit much, isn't it?"

"I'm not asking for much from a two-yuan game, but at least don't use the system's built-in Paint program to design it!"

This piece of junk!

He could make it himself!

"And isn't this just Mario! Even the levels are identical! I could clear this blindfolded!"

With that, A Yin started the game.

He controlled the smug-faced, demonic little cat, walking forward a few steps while narrating:

"Move forward, hey, jump, stomp this little enemy, hit that question block ahead, there's a coin—"

As he spoke, A Yin made the smug cat jump up to hit the block.

But then.

Diu—

A smug sound effect rang out.

The block that should have spat out a coin instead shifted upward by one square right before everyone's eyes!

"Huh?"

A Yin froze, instinctively holding down the jump button.

Diu—

Another sound effect, and the question block flew even higher.

"What the hell?"

A Yin finally realized something was off:

"Why won't it let me hit it?"

The livestream audience saw this and seemed to start realizing this game had some tricks up its sleeve—

"Hahahaha I've lived this long and never seen a brick that moves on its own"

"Brick: Move it, stay away from me!"

"Hahahaha so dismissive"

"'I can clear this with my eyes closed'"

"Looks kinda interesting, huh..."

"So damn cheeky..."

After trying to jump twice more, watching the brick dodge higher and higher until grabbing the coin was hopeless, A Yin gave up:

"Forget it, forget it. It's just a coin, no big deal. There's a mushroom up ahead anyway."

With that, A Yin kept moving forward and smoothly hit the second question block.

Ding-dong!

As the sound effect rang out, the mushroom from A Yin's memory appeared, sliding down along a row of bricks.

A Yin had already run under the bricks, ready to eat the mushroom and grow bigger.

At the same time, he couldn't help bragging: "I can clear this game with my eyes closed. See? I've already memorized the layout..."

Before he could finish!

That purple mushroom slid down along the bricks.

Right on target, it landed square on Mario Bros.' head.

Then!

A Yin's Mario Bros. did a little hop on the spot and instantly died!

At the same time, a line of last words popped up above his head—

[This mushroom... is poisonous...]

After a brief moment of shock, A Yin was completely stunned!

"What the hell? Huh? I've played Super Mario for over twenty years, and no one ever told me mushrooms could be poisonous!!!"

Clearly!

This absurd death not only shocked A Yin but also had the audience howling with laughter!

'Died from eating a mushroom hahahaha'

'Mario would laugh at you for life'

'So damn ridiculous hahahaha'

'Young people sure drop fast, lie down and sleep'

'Even scared the Number One in Jinmen accent out of him hahaha'

'Cause of death: I can memorize the layout'

'The last words kill me'

'This game is toxic hahahaha...'

At this point!

From streamer A Yin to the chat audience, everyone truly realized this game was no joke!

On the surface, the level design seemed identical to Mario.

But danger lurked everywhere, with unexpected traps at every step!

A Yin took a deep breath, glanced at the screen full of cheerful glowstick gifts, and steadied himself:

"Ah—damn! Got it, got it! This game's challenging me, huh!"

"Son of a bitch, playing dirty with me, are you? Fine!"

With that!

A Yin sat up straight, flexed his fingers, and gripped the controller tight!

"I'm a PC and motion-capture pod dual-platform game streamer—you think you can get one over on me?!"

Regrouping!

A Yin's Mario Bros. started over!

The coin brick at the start? Skip it!

The mushroom from the block? Poisonous, don't eat it!

And by sheer luck, A Yin even dodged the flying fish monster that suddenly burst out of the first pipe!

"...Damn! See that? What do you call Number One in Jinmen!"

A Yin patted his chest.

"Ah, with a reaction like that just now, anyone who saw it would have to say, 'Young Hero, Good Skills!'"

As he spoke, A Yin was quite pleased, hopping to stomp a small monster and arriving under the second pipe.

After a couple of probing pokes, A Yin confirmed no flying fish monsters would emerge from this pipe.

He couldn't help but chuckle:

"Take this pipe, for example—you can tell whether the designer really understands Super Mario."

"Because any old player knows this pipe should lead to a hidden room."

"Let's give it a try."

With that, A Yin stepped onto the pipe's opening and pressed down on the D-pad.

Sure enough!

After a brief pause, Mario Bros. gradually sank into the pipe.

A Yin nodded approvingly: "Not bad, remembering this hidden level shows the designer..."

Before he could finish!

Suddenly!

The pipe began to shake in place!

And as the shaking grew more violent, to everyone's stunned disbelief, roaring flames erupted from the pipe's base!

Then, a rumbling sound came.

The pipe transformed into a rocket, shooting straight into the sky, carrying Mario Bros. into the heavens, vanishing into a speck of starlight!

Life: -1

A Yin: ...

"It shows the damn designer is insane!!!"

Bam!

Because the scene before him was just too absurd, A Yin slammed the table on the spot!

"Is this how Cinema teaches you to make games!?"