Social Anxiety and the Rock of Loneliness

She really did look disappointed.

He felt he should find an opportunity to explain things clearly—seriously explain what he meant.

So it could not be in front of the other band members, nor on the way to the train station.

That left only one place: the place where he enjoyed having his personal space.

But it seemed like quite a long walk. Could a homebody like Bocchi walk that far?

He immediately picked up his phone and looked up some information.

After silently planning out tomorrow's schedule, he opened LINE and casually scrolled through it. When he saw Kita Ikuyo's profile picture, he smiled.

After returning home, Kita called out to her family.

"I'm home."

Her mother responded flatly from the living room.

Kita went into the living room for a look. Her mother was still watching TV. After greeting her, she turned and returned to her room.

Entering her cluttered-looking room, filled with all sorts of little decorations and one or two cute stuffed animals, she quickly sat down at her desk.

She picked up an instrument bag beside it.

Pulling the zipper all the way down, she took out the instrument inside.

Looking at its six strings, she nodded firmly.

"This definitely isn't a bass."

But as she said that, she remembered what the others had said and added uncertainly, "...Right?"

Just then, her phone received a message. From the notification sound, she could tell it was from the group she had marked for special attention.

She quickly opened her phone.

It was from Ishikawa Hayato.

"Can Kita do makeup?"

Kita Ikuyo's head filled with question marks. Was he questioning a high school girl's basic skills?

Kita: "Of course. I'm really good at that."

Ishikawa Hayato: "Mm, that makes things much easier. The kind of music you like requires some makeup skills. I was worried about it just now."

Music, makeup?

They really were talking about music, right?

Kita: "I feel like you tricked me again..."

A while later, the other side sent a smiling banana-man sticker, along with a link to an MV.

So she really had been tricked!

Kita Ikuyo was starting to worry about what exactly this genre of music was.

She opened the link and saw the title: Detroit Metal City Band. Looking further down and seeing all the positive reviews, she relaxed.

At least it did not seem like a scary video.

Still, the upload dates on the videos were all from a long time ago.

She did not understand why Ishikawa Hayato had sent her this video, but she still opened the music MV uneasily.

Not long after the frantic music began, a strange figure with pale face paint and horrifying black eye makeup suddenly sprang out like a cockroach.

"I~'M~GOING~TO~KILL~~YOU~~!!!"

"Ahhhhh!"

Kita Ikuyo threw her phone away.

Not long after sending the message, Ishikawa Hayato received Kita Ikuyo's reply.

Kita: "Ishikawa-kun... can you come to STARRY earlier tomorrow?"

Ishikawa Hayato: "What do you think? This song suits your mood right now, doesn't it?"

Kita: "I'll kill youuuuu! (with a cute knife-wielding emoticon)"

Ishikawa Hayato smiled and put away his phone.

After getting home.

Seeing his dad watching the news at home, and thinking that he had not talked much with his family lately, he sat down beside him as well.

When it was time to eat.

Hibiki came downstairs and, before she had even reached the living room, heard the voices of two men inside grandly discussing affairs of state and pointing out the course of the world.

Their tone was so presidential it made even the president sound less presidential, and she let out a deep sigh.

Even by the time they sat down to eat, the two were still endlessly arguing over how the world would develop and change in the future.

Finally unable to take it anymore, Hibiki set down her chopsticks and complained to her brother beside her.

"Big brother, you're so loud!"

Ishikawa Hayato sat up straight and looked down imperiously at his sister beside him.

"You actually dare speak to me like that! You..."

Before he could finish, their mother's gentle call instantly knocked him back into shape.

"Hayato~"

His expression changed, and he immediately switched gears.

"Tonight's dinner is delicious. Our great mother must have added her love for us into it."

Seeing her son start spouting nonsense again, Ishikawa Jinpei shouted in objection.

"Nonsense! Only my bowl has Shizuka's love in it!"

This time, Ishikawa Hayato's mother, Ishikawa Shizuka, was the one who sighed.

After things quieted down for a while, amid the soft clinking of chopsticks, Ishikawa Jinpei—still not over his earlier grand discussion—asked Hibiki, "Have you decided on a high school yet? Do you want to go with your brother?"

"With that pervert?" Hibiki looked up at her father in disbelief.

Ishikawa Hayato lifted his head as though he had just been praised.

But after saying that, Hibiki glanced at Ishikawa Hayato, fell silent for a while, then suddenly said with a hint of irritation, "We'll talk about it later!"

The next day, after greeting his mother and telling her she did not need to prepare lunch for him, Ishikawa Hayato left home.

He checked his phone and saw no message from Bocchi rejecting him.

He was not sure whether Bocchi wanted to come or not. After all, hardly anyone could see through layer upon layer of psychological defenses and understand what someone else was thinking.

People sometimes did not even know what they themselves were thinking, or why they did what they did.

After taking the train to Iketora Station, he spotted Bocchi the moment he exited the station. She was sitting on a public bench with her head lowered, seemingly lost in thought.

She was still wearing a tracksuit today, with a beige cloth bag slung over her shoulder—an outfit so unfashionable no one would give it a second glance.

Judging by how she looked, there was no telling how long she had been waiting there.

Ishikawa Hayato understood why she was like this, though.

She was the sort to worry about every possible situation and prepare early. Then, once she had finished preparing, she would wonder whether the other person might arrive early too, so she came ahead of time.

"Bocchi."

Ishikawa Hayato only greeted her after walking a little closer.

Bocchi raised her head, her sapphire-blue eyes peering out from beneath her bangs at Ishikawa Hayato.

"Ah, good morning."

"Yeah, good morning. Let's go."

Ishikawa Hayato walked over to her side and waved. Bocchi followed after him, both hands gripping the strap of her bag.

After leaving the station, Ishikawa Hayato glanced at the map and led Bocchi toward a street with few pedestrians.

After walking for a short while, Bocchi grew nervous from the complete lack of conversation. At the same time, she realized the area was becoming somewhat secluded, and she asked Ishikawa Hayato with a little fear, "Um... Ishikawa, where are we going?"

Ishikawa Hayato, who had been thinking of teasing Bocchi a little earlier, finally smiled.

"Bocchi, you followed me this far without even knowing where we were going. I'm worried about your safety in the future."

But Bocchi seemed to have recovered by then.

Well, recovered to her usual gloomy state.

"Ah... someone as worthless as me, nobody would want me anyway..."

She looked gloomily at the tiny pebbles on the ground.

Ishikawa Hayato did not know whether she said that because of their earlier conversation about part-time work, or because she genuinely thought that way.

He recalled Bocchi's family situation, then continued, "Bocchi's parents definitely care about you." He looked at Bocchi. "You should pay more attention to your family, Bocchi."

But Bocchi merely nodded and did not respond further.

They walked for a little while longer.

"We're here."

Ishikawa Hayato stopped walking.

Following Ishikawa Hayato's gaze, Bocchi saw a sign overhead.

Bicycle Rentals.

Huh?

Bocchi's eyes darted back and forth between Ishikawa Hayato and the bicycle rental shop, full of confusion.

Why had he specifically come all the way to this bicycle rental shop in such a remote place? And hadn't they passed one just now?

Could it be...!

Bicycle—chain—chainsaw.

Illegal clinic!

He wasn't going to... chop her up and sell her organs, was he?!

So that was what Ishikawa meant earlier. And she'd trusted him so much, too.

Was it still too late to run?

Run now...

Her hand was grabbed.

Bocchi looked at Ishikawa Hayato in terror.

His expression was grave, and like a thug heading off to commit a crime, he pulled her into the bicycle rental shop.